its easier to keep fallin...
I walked home with the guys, Benji had texted me a little while ago saying she couldn’t take being inside anymore, I don’t think she really has a choice anymore. “the guys want to come over and see you, I dunno if you want to see them though” I texted her back. “No its fine, there's nothing I can’t hide at this point besides how tired I am” she replied. “Alright she said it was good for her to hang out.” I said to the group as we walked.
“Gerard, what is wrong with her? What's been going on?” Bob asked me sounding really concerned. “I’m his own brother and I don’t know what's going on. I live there.” Mikey chimed in. “Look guys, I can’t say anything. This isn’t my place to open my mouth. If you ask her yourself, she might tell you, but I don’t know how comfortable she is talking about this.” I answered honestly. Nobody asked another question. We got into the house and down to my room. Benji was dressed and sitting on my bed playing video games.
Bob sat beside Benji and hugged her. This was quite unusual behavior for him. “Hey.” Benji smiled and hugged him. “How are you?” He asked her quietly. “I’m fine…thanks for asking.” “But if you don’t mind the rest of us asking, what happened, Benj? Why have you been down here and gone for so long? We’ve asked Gerard a million questions and he refuses to crack.” Ray sat down too. “Mikey doesn’t even know?” she looked up at me and him. I just shook my head. She had a legitimate smile on her face. I’m glad she can trust me.
Benji looked around the room to everyone just staring her down. They all demanded an answer that I wasn’t sure if she was comfortable giving. I’ve never seen Frank so concentrated, he hasn’t said 1 word since he saw her. “What did he do?” Frankie finally spoke up. Benji looked at him like she just saw a ghost. “How…?” She whispered. Frank walked over to her and put his arms around her “Fuck that, you have all of us to protect you. This won’t happen again.” Benji just nodded her head against his chest.
We all sat around and waited for someone to say something to start a conversation. This room was too quiet. I didn’t know if I should tell her if the police came for her, or if I should just leave it alone. I know I should tell her so she doesn’t go back to school, but then she really can’t go back to school. She won’t be able to get her diploma. I waited until after everyone left before I sat down with her. “Alright, Benj… The police are looking for you. A cop came to school today and took me out of class asking if I knew where you were, you’re dad must’ve remembered me from the other morning.” “How did he find out your name?” “I came to your house to walk you to school the other day, when you came to stay with me.” “Well what do I do now?” her head fell into her hands. “I’m going to figure something out, you can’t stay with him. Where is your mom at?” “Dead…”
I had no idea what to do at this point. All of my options are becoming slim to none. A huge part of me is saying to tell the police finally about what's happened, a little part of me wants to just hop on a plane back home, but I know I can’t go back home and I know I can’t go back to school until I figure all of this out. Gerard has been nice enough to let me share his bed with him; he’s kept the nightmares away for the most part. He’s doing this almost better than Zack did when I had him around. I’m so confused about life right now. It might just be easier on everyone if I pack up and go home.
Gerard came back from another day of school. He looked so drained. “Are you okay?” I moved over so he could sit beside of me. “Yea, just been a long day.” “Why?” “Fight at school. Fucking assholes were messing with my brother so I got up, then Frank got up. It’s just been a long day.” “Well what did the school do?” “What they always do. They suspended Frankie, Mike and I; didn’t do anything to Rick and his friends.” “So how long are you out?” “Next few days. Nothing major, but my mom is pissed off.” “I’m sorry.” “Not your fault.”
The room got silent for a few minutes. “Gerard, thanks a lot for helping me out.” “Duh.” He smiled at me. “No, seriously. You don’t understand how much this means to me. You’re a big part of my life. I don’t know what I want to do yet though. I honestly thought about just packing up and going home, but then again if I talk to the cops they might just take me out of his house.” “I don’t want you to do anything that’s going to affect your future.” “I don’t even know what would be best.” “Well Frank said that when his dad was beating him up, his mom called the cops and they pulled him away immediately.” “Well that’s good and all, but my mom is dead and I’m still a minor.” “You’ll be 18 in a few months.” “I know, but that’s too long to be out of school… I guess I should call the cops and see what I can do.”
It took me a few days to get the courage to call the cops, but I finally did it. They told me they’d been looking for me for a few days now and that I was good at hiding. When I told them the deal, they said for me to stay where I have been staying, they’d be over within the next day or two. By now Gerard’s mom knows what's going on and she was more than happy to take me. I got to meet his grandmother at dinner the other night, apparently she loves me. The police showed up just as they said and gave his mom permission to hold me until my court date. I ended up getting a social worker, that was a trip. She’s a bitch.
Finally I started going back to school. My teachers somehow knew what was going on and they had no problem either excusing me from the work I’d missed or they gave me enough time to make it up. Gerard, Frankie, Mikey and I all came back to school at the same time. Ray and Bob looked so happy to see us again.
During the next few weeks I’d met with my social worker 2 times a week. She prepared me for court, told me what to wear, what to say and what not to say. She was actually starting to get on my side about this whole deal. Finally I saw my dad in court. Needless to say, he did not look pleased with me. Everything worked out for me, Gerard’s mom had my custody handed over to her and my dad was sentenced to 3 years in jail and anger management classes when he got out. I felt so relieved. During this whole thing I had talked to Zack almost every night. He kept saying he was coming back for me, but I told him to just stay out there because there was no point in coming out here. The other guys were supporting me just like always.
Sitting back in Gerard’s room after all of these weeks was the best thing I’ve ever felt. I knew this was a home I could come to and feel great about. They even had an extra room for me. After all of my stuff was in the room, I laid back on my bed and looked out of the window “Finally.”