(#) paracelsus 2006-05-27Something is wrong here. Harry is a little too calculating; too aware of his destiny. This is what Dumbledore sent him to the Dursley's to avoid. His friends will notice the change. How is he going to inspire the kind or love and loyalty he will need in the final confrontation?
Author's responseObviously, that approach failed in this potter-verse. And this Harry will be more calculating, devious, and, at times, ruthless.
(#) Terdwilicker 2007-10-05Some points in this story are awfully WAFFish, and others tend towards a severe Gary Stu'ness which was a turn off in reading. However, parts of it were quite funny, like the duel using houses. I laughed hard at that bit. I hope in future you'll be willing to write an HP story which DOESN'T require him to be massively out of character, massively overpowered, and massively well informed. Consider it a challenge. How can you manage to bring HP through all these trials and tribulations without cheating? After all, how great of a hero would Harry be if he's massively more powerful than anyone else? Answer: not much. It would be good if you applied your talents/education in history and looked for a more objective method for Harry to accomplish his goals in a more believable way, with the least outlandish advantage. Something as small as studying 10 more minutes a day would probably be enough for him to defeat Tom. Find a Butterfly Effect without the massive power-ups and go from there.
Author's responseTry my first schnoogle story (Relations/Price of Peace). You can easily argue I wrote too much, so there probably something somewhere that would appeal to most fanfic readers
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