Categories > Original > Humor > The Book of Hondo
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0 ReviewsHondonian Limericks
There once was a guy named Jake
Who had about all he couldst take.
So he hauled out his shotgun—
Let me tell thee that no one
Messeth with Extreme Jake!
There once was a pilot named Wayne
Who didst fly into hurricane.
His plane didst go around,
And then went straight down,
There now is a sailor named Wayne.
There once was a stuntman named Max
Who did his own stunts on railroad tracks.
He poured on some nitro,
For he was a pyro,
And the train cars now runneth on their backs.
There once was a man named Yoco,
Whom everyone thought to be loco:
As he stood in the rain
’Twould drive him insane
To think that sheep shrink in slo-mo.
There once was a man named Scoot,
Who was always oot scootin’ aboot.
And all o’er the land
He couldst backwards stand,
When Scoot the Ko’An was afoot.
There once was a tree in the wood
Which didst fall down, but could
It maketh a sound
With no one around?
’Tis a riddle no one understood.
There was a toaster from Greenwich,
Who was cursed with the gooney itch,
And squirrels may chanceth,
Other little fucks danceth
Lately till no one knoweth which is which.
There was a VCR that spat tapes,
And gophers can take on many shapes,
’Twas too civilized
To be magnetized,
The squid was a kid that wore capes.
Who had about all he couldst take.
So he hauled out his shotgun—
Let me tell thee that no one
Messeth with Extreme Jake!
There once was a pilot named Wayne
Who didst fly into hurricane.
His plane didst go around,
And then went straight down,
There now is a sailor named Wayne.
There once was a stuntman named Max
Who did his own stunts on railroad tracks.
He poured on some nitro,
For he was a pyro,
And the train cars now runneth on their backs.
There once was a man named Yoco,
Whom everyone thought to be loco:
As he stood in the rain
’Twould drive him insane
To think that sheep shrink in slo-mo.
There once was a man named Scoot,
Who was always oot scootin’ aboot.
And all o’er the land
He couldst backwards stand,
When Scoot the Ko’An was afoot.
There once was a tree in the wood
Which didst fall down, but could
It maketh a sound
With no one around?
’Tis a riddle no one understood.
There was a toaster from Greenwich,
Who was cursed with the gooney itch,
And squirrels may chanceth,
Other little fucks danceth
Lately till no one knoweth which is which.
There was a VCR that spat tapes,
And gophers can take on many shapes,
’Twas too civilized
To be magnetized,
The squid was a kid that wore capes.
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