A conversation on the rooftop of number 12 Grimmauld Place. Note: This is a first draft, so any and all critique is useful, so long as it's constructive. "This sucks" isn't going to cut it. The...
(#) ShadingInGrey 2005-05-21 03:43:07 AMThis really makes you think - and certainly doesn't suck!
You might want to watch out for typos, though. Also, not meaning to be offensive, but I'd be a bit iffy about posting it - it could easily be read as promoting suicide. And if I read this a year ago... suicide would've been a lot more likely.
However, this is very thought-provocative, and interesting.
Author's responseI'll be killing typos until I die. I swear, I have some pieces where I've killed the SAME typo five times and it keeps coming back. And yes, I've made certain to hit 'save'.
As for promoting suicide...well, there are people who read the poem "Southern Cop" as promoting anti-black sentiment despite the fact that Mr. Brown really was brown. I'm guessing from your comment that you respond well (or at least well enough) to the standard anti-suicide reasoning or something similar, and that's good. I'm Remus in this story, only I've been dealing with it longer. This is for all of the mes in the world that need something ELSE to keep them going...even if it's just a bitter resentment of life that makes them chuck potions ingredients at people's heads. You said it makes you think. That's what I was aiming for, and if I can keep one person out there who thinks like me and is ready to drown themselves if one more person tells them that they're doing the bare minimum required of them by breathing alive...well, all the better. And thank you for the review. I found it most helpful.