Timeskip To Lunch...
The feather spins between my two fingers and my thumb. I twirl it as I walk around the courtyard during lunch period. I haven't seen any of the boys yet. I've even texted Gerard and he hasn't texted back yet. That little weirdness in the hallway... The black wings and then the black feather right where he was standing... I couldn't explain it. It's supernatural or odd. Definantly both. It's made me curious about him. He hasn't told me much about himself, really. Who he is exactly, why I feel so safe around him... Why I saw wings. I want to confront him about it. Infact, I want to tell him everylast thing I want to know about him.
I sit down on the concrete stairs that lead us students to the picnic tabels. Before anything, I notice further down the long staircase, sitting upon the tabels are not just some jocks. But more girlies. I feel actually quite thankful that they haven't spotted me yet. Either they have, or they don't see me as someone worth their time at the moment. I'm then startled by a ringtone. The melody was Metallica's Nothing Else Matters. I must've been loud because even the preppy kids bellow heard it. They turn their heads to me. I look down at them. I can see the hungry looks within their further viewed pupils. I decide to crack a joke.
"If you're so hungry," I say pausing because of nervousness. "Why don't you eat each other's sexual needs in the gym showers?" I bite my lip. A couple of the girls bellow try to intimedate me with a "What did you just say to me?" stare. The men gawk at each other. I think I just became a target because they seem like they have something they want to do. Something that includes me. I step up one stair and check the text. It's Gerard.
"We're coming outside. We'll meet you by the picnic tables." I look behind me and I see the men approaching. I mumble a thanks to the sky. I walk faster, turning around and trotting over to the guys. Gerard welcomes me with open arms. Hugging him, I advise them to stay clear because I may have pissed them off. Frankie high fives me and Gerard chuckles. Mikey just acts bored, but I can still see the anxiousness within his stance. Ray's smiling. They're so friendly. I hate how this school's so full of judgmental people and-- and... bitches.
Gerard takes Frankie's hand-- I get a shock of jealousy-- and his four fingers hanging onto my index finger. I feel the notion to giggle, but nah. I dare not to.
We all sit under a large, old, oak tree on the hill that wasn't too far from the picnic tables. Frank and I have no lunches. It was stolen from our lockers. But we don't mind. Frankie leaned up against a tree and my head laid upon his lap. Michelle's glancing up at us frequantly, a sorrowful look in her eyes. She's been talking to Mikey. And for once, Mikey's talking to a girl. Ray fell asleep on one of the lower branches. His snoring's so loud, it's hilarious.
Frankie's talking about how stupid the popular cliques are. Mikey's explaining to Michelle about something that has to do with forks in toasters. She begins giggling. I think she's going to be a great addition to our little family here. She's the first girl Mikey's spoken to since his grade eight graduation. Though, I feel a slight pinch of jealousy when I see her smile at Mikey. I then wanted to make an excuse to leave. Is my "crush" on her seriously that bad? Or is it good? I don't know. It's confusing to me.
Getting up, I say I've forgotten something in my locker. When I get up to depart myself temporarily, I am being watched by Michelle. She wants something from me. She wants it. I can notice it a mile away. Infact, when I turn the corner a few feet to sit on the brick wall that creates the garden, she appears. A questioning expression, full of curiousity.
"Is something wrong?" She asks me, sitting beside my anxious soul. I want her-- no... need her. More than I need Frankie. She looks into my eyes as if digging for something precious. I melt within that gaze.
I open my mouth and shake my head. "No, not exactly."
She moved closer slightly and rested her head on my shoulder. I begin shaking uncontrolably. I whispered that I could tell her anything. That she wants to listen to my thoughts. That she wants to know about me. Every last bit of information. It was as though she was suppose to do research on me. She turns her head placing her chin on my shoulder and looking at me as I stare right back. We're at lips' distance and I know this isn't right because of Frankie and I. I finally speak up.
"I'm eighteen. A singer and cartoonist. I'm emo, too. I'm bisexual. I don't believe in self-harm. Us four boys created a band called "My Chemical Romance". And--" She took her right hand out of her right pocket and showed me a feather. It was three quarters of a foot long, black and glimmering. I immediantly reconized where it came from. Me. "What's that from?" I can tell she wanted to giggle because she smiled.
"I don't know. But when you left me in the hallways, it was right where you were standing." I watch her while biting my lower lip. I don't know what to say. Then she speaks again. "I want to know something... When you snatched me, I saw wings. Big black wings. Then they vanished as if they weren't even there."
When I responded to her, it was a lie in action. And it wasn't even my mind that wanted to do it, my body just reacted in a way that actually made her think the trip knocked her brain up a little. I told her that she was hilucinating. She needed some rest. I couldn't let her just yet figure out who I am. Only Mikey, Frankie, and Ray knows who I am really. I just met her and yet my feelings overcome myself whenever she and I are in the same area. If she found out, she'd most likely see me as some freak.
She nods. She fell for it hopefully. She asks for a little bit more of information. I can't think of anything immediantly except for those three tiny words. I shake my head advoiding them. And before I knew it her lips were on mine. My cheeks burned a red colour, out-redding my eyeliner. It was clear on my cheeks, I could tell. I began to think of Frankie. Then that's when I felt wrong. My stomache turned, but my heart skipped several beats until we unlocked ourselves from the each other. She stared into my eyes, I stared back. I wanted more. I needed more. So I kissed her deeper than she kissed me. My eyes were half-way shut, hers was completely closed. I began to think of Frankie again. I departed our lips and took her back to the three boys where Frankie attacked me with a glomp.
I caught him and he licked my lower lip before his lips pushed into mine. I closed my eyes and could see an image of Michelle falling to tears and cutting herself again. I pulled away and grabbed my forehead and began to run off. I looked back to the boys to see they were watching me. Michelle quickly grabbed out her phone and began texting. When she put it away mine vibrated again. I pull it out and read what she said.
In big letters was one word. "Sorry". I placed it back in my pocket and ran inside and found a staircase to the rooftop. I run to the edge of the building and I maintain a swan dive position and watch my shadow as I plummit down. I think of crows and the black feather, and soon my shadow creates two large wing-shaped figures and where it came from was my back. I swoop back up and to the blue sky to fly back home. I just start wishing that Michelle didn't see my tears. Or even my wings for that matter. Too much stress. I need some rest myself.