A familiar smell; that comforting, loving smell, beckoned me back into consciousness, and I gladly followed. My eyes opened to be facing a ceiling littered with posters of bands and horror movies. The gorey faces and dark colours reassured that I was in my haven, I was safe.
The warm pillow cradling my head moved and groaned, transforming into Frank, My Frankie.
The normal phrase which I had heard so many times was like a punch in the gut, reminding me that nothing, nothing, would be the same again. My glasses started to steam with tears, blurring the frown on Frank’s face.
‘Oh Frankie, h-he j-just told me to leave... my own d-dad’ Another sob wrenched from my throat as he cradled me closer.
‘I know baby, but we told him now, that part’s over. You can stay here until he calms down, and I promise he will eventually, you’re all he’s got.’
My sobs had subsided to ugly snuffling sounds, and Frankie began to hum softly.
I need to get my stuff, I needed to talk to Gerard- shit, Gerard. What could I say to him? Will he still live with dad? If not where will he go? I mean- an insistent vibrating cut through my thoughts. I pulled out my cell to see Gee’s number calling. Oh god, fuck. I shifted off of Frankie so I was cross legged on his violent red duvet, and accepted the call.
'Mikey?! What’s happened? I got home and dad was drunk and shouting and you were gone and –'
'Gerard, listen. I told dad about me -' I squeezed Frank’s hand '– and Frank. He said tha- he said that he never wanted to see me again. I’m at Franks now.'
'WHAT?! How can dad say that? I’m coming round now, then we’re going back to dads and talking to him –'
'NO.' The force of my shout made Frank jump and the phoneline crackle. 'I can’t talk to him Gee, okay? I can’t. I’m safe here, I’ll see you Monday. I love you gee.'
I hung up and threw the phone on the floor. I collapsed across Frank’s bed, tears forming in my eyes yet again. Suddenly feeling overwhelmed with more exhaustion, I drooped back into his arms
‘Just sleep, Mikey, Just sleep.’