“You kicked him out?!?” roared Jon, infuriated by what he’d just heard. “How dare you, Brendon! How dare you kick him out of what he started! This is his band, not yours!” He screamed. Ryan could see Brendon crumpling and it broke Ryan’s heart farther.
“Stop it, Jon. It’s for the best. I am not what is best for this band right now, and the three of you are going to make the music that the fans are craving. I can’t do that anymore. I’m making the music I need to, not the music they want.”
“Ryan! How can you be okay with this? He can’t just kick you out like that! Spencer, back me up here,” Jon cried, turning to Spencer for help.
Spencer took a deep breath. “As long as we’re being honest here, I think that this could be for the best. I think that Panic will be able to expand creatively with this… change,” Spencer said, looking sadly at Jon.
Jon stared at Spencer, betrayed. “Spencer,” he whispered, the hurt evident in his voice. Spencer reached out to touch Jon’s arm softly. “Think about it, honey. From a creative standpoint, it’s the right thing to do,” he said gently. Jon yanked his arm away. “I thought you loved me,” Jon said, tears in his eyes. “Jon, of course I-“ Jon was shaking his head. “I’m sorry, Spencer. But I can’t. I love you. But I can’t,” he said, stepping back. He turned his attention to Ryan. “I’m coming with you,” he said.
Brendon and Spencer turned to stare at Ryan. He could say no, and Jon would probably stay. But if he said yes, Jon wouldn’t look back. Ryan bit his lip. He could see the heartbreak in Spencer’s eyes, the heartbreak in Brendon’s. If he said no, they would be okay. They would make music and forget about him. They would be fine. If he said no, he wouldn’t have to break Spencer’s heart too. He had to say no. He needed to say no. He was going to say no.