Gerard held him close, never wanting to let go. His heart was aching for Frank.
“Frank, I can get the dishes.” Mikey sounded unsure
“No, you’ve done enough. It’s the least I can do” Frank smiled
Mikey sighed “Ok….”
Frank placed the dished in the sink and started washing them. He felt a pair of arms wrap around his waist and saw black hair in the corner of his eye.
“Gerard….Mikey” Frank warned, not wanting to get caught.
Gerard nodded kissing his neck “I know….He’s in the other room”
Frank laughed, wiping his hands on a towel before turning around to face Gerard. He wrapped his arms around his neck, pulling him in for a kiss.
“Did you not get enough this morning?”
Gerard pulled back and had a suddenly serious face on.
“Frank, I need to ask you something”
Frank grinned and tried to kiss Gerard again but he pulled back.
“This is serious Frank….please…”
Frank sighed “Ok. Fine….What’s up Gee?”
“Frank….were you….did you want….”
“Did I what Gee?”
“Did you want to die?”
Frank froze. Gerard looked at him with a sad smile, begging for an answer. Frank looked away
“I…I don’t…I don’t know Gee…..I..”
Gerard pulled Frank’s chin so he was looking him in the eyes
“Frank, talk to me. Please….I want to help”
Frank closed his eyes, tearing his face out of Gerard’s grip. “It felt so good to feel nothing. No pain, no misery, just a cold blanket wrapping around you. I was happy…..”
Gerard frowned “You were happy dying? Frank….”
“No Gerard. You asked and I’m telling you. Its so miserably being me. Everyone hates me, no one listens…..even my mother is clueless. Its so much better if I’m gone”
“Frank. I love you. I listen to you. How can you think that anything without you would be better off?”
Gerard’s eyes started to water at the thought of Frank dying. He held him close, never wanting to let go. His heart was aching for Frank. Frank buried his face in Gerard’s chest, gripping his shoulders for support.
“Shhhhh Its ok. I’m here….I’m here. Promise me you won’t ever do that again.”
Frank nodded in Gerard’s chest, soaking his skin with his tears. Gerard stroked Franks hair lovingly, trying to calm him down. He reminded Gerard of a child who had just woken up from a nightmare. Frank’s nails scratched Gerard’s back as he gripped him, afraid he would walk away.
Frank pulled away to look Gerard in they eyes “Do you really love me Gerard?”
Gerard smiled “I swear, from the bottom of my black little heart, I fucking love you”
Frank’s heart skipped a beat and he smiled, kissing Gerard with so much passion.
“I love you too Gee”
Gerard smiled, pulling Frank into a hug, burring his face in Frank’s neck. They stayed like that until they heard the water shut off and Mikey step out of the bathroom.
“Come on. Lets go get you some clothes then a shower….we smell like sex”
Frank giggled “Is that a bad thing?”
“Yes….well no but…If we don’t want Mikey to find out we have to be sneaky”
Gerard grinned, pulling Frank’s hand into his bedroom to find a pair of clean clothes he could wear. They locked themselves in his room until Mikey was back in the living room. Gerard dug though his piles of clothes and found a pair of tight black jeans and a dark green t-shirt with the words Christ is a Zombie on it in bold black letters.
“Here, now go take a shower” Gerard said as he threw the clothes at Frank.
“I love the shirt” Frank laughed and walked out the room to do as he was told.
Gerard sat down on his bed and fell back on his pillow, looking up at the ceiling. There was a knock at the door and Mikey walked in afterwards.
Gerard spoke not looking away from the stain he had found on the ceiling.
“Hey Mikes. Whats up?”
Mike walked in and sat down on the bed. “Can we talk?”
Gerard sat up and looked at Mikey “Sure. Whats on your mind?”
Mikey sighed “Frank….something’s off about him.”
Gerard sighed, knowing this conversation was going to happen. “Let me guess, he looks at me with eyes that are begging for something more than friendship and your worried about me right?”
Gerard nodded, thinking about if he should tell his brother about them or not.
Aww fuck it
“Mikey….what if I told you I liked Frank….more than friends”
Gerard looked at Mikey with slight fear in his eyes, afraid of what his answer would be. Would he hate him? Disown him? Outcast him?
Mikey rubbed his neck thinking about his answer “I would ask if you were happy….does he make you happy Gee?”
Gerard smiled, hugging his brother “He does.”
Mikey hugged back “Then that’s all that matters.”
“Thanks Mikey…..I was so afraid you would hate me for it….”
“You’re my brother, I can never hate you……you can tell me anything Gee, you know that”
Mikey smiled, holding Gerard on his bed for a while until they heard the shower turn off. Gerard looked at Mikey
“Frank is going to come in here……”
Mikey smirked standing up “I’m leaving”
Mikey was half way out the door when he heard Gerard call him back one more time.
“Hey Mikey….promise me something”
“Don’t tell anybody about me and Frank….no just for me but for him”
Mikey smiled “what about you and Frank?”