There is a reason for Gerard's feminine ways, unknown to anyone else but him. Oneshot.
Gerard applied a bit of blush on his cheeks, sucking them in to outline the cheekbones. He brushed his fiery red locks and teased them so one side fell slightly over his left eye. He inspected his work in the dressing room mirror, turning his face in all angles. He had to be perfect. He had to be pretty.
Yet, it was not always like this.
True, the show business had put pressure on Gerard to be appealing to the eyes of fifteen year old, hormone driven girls. Still, it went further back than most people knew.
Mikey Way would tell you that his brother had always had a feminine touch to him. A touch that stemmed back to when they were barely teenagers.
Yet, unbeknownst to Mikey, the touch was not a feminine one at all. It was a violent touch, a rough and calloused touch. And that touch went by the name of Peter Neff.
By the name alone no one would know it, but Peter was a cousin of the famous Way brothers. He had the same brownish hair they did, slim and pale. He was rather muscular and much older, however. At least by about 6 or 8 years. At this point, Gerard could no longer recall. He had not seen Peter since the nights that Peter would babysit him and Mikey.
Gerard had few memories of that period.
Yet, so many nightmares.
They were in their pre-teens. Gerard must have been about 14, Mikey only 11. They both believed themselves far too old for a babysitter, but Donna spent a lot of nights out at the time, and so she had insisted. At first, it was not that they had disliked Peter. Merely that their mother's lack of trust in them was slightly insulting.
Gerard had gotten along better with Peter, seeing as he was slightly older. Mikey was just a kid. Therefore, they would always send Mikey to bed earlier, while Gerard always got the privilege of staying up 2 or 3 hours more with Peter. Usually, this was spent watching horror movies in the basement. Mikey complained about it so much.
Then one particular night, Peter had wanted to spend the extra hour or two doing something that, at the time, Gerard found odd.
Peter wanted to dress up in women's clothing.
Gerard thought it had been merely a joke at first. That first night Peter coaxed Gerard into getting into a black mini cocktail dress, fishnet stockings, and rather tall high heels. He fit in it well, as Gerard always did have a girlish figure. His hair at the time was long, and he did look quite convincingly like a member of the opposite sex. Peter took a few pictures, insisting it was all for fun. Peter put on some jewelry himself, but nothing like Gerard wore. They took a few silly photos together, and then they took the clothing off...and that was it. They got back into normal clothes, and so Gerard thought nothing of it.
Which is why he thought it was strange when Peter insisted he keep it a secret, but even then he did not question very much. He trusted Peter. Thinking back on it now, he probably just enjoyed the fact that someone older and "cool" like Peter felt so comfortable hanging out with him.
Yet it was not long before things started getting really odd, even for the stupid kid that he was at the time. Peter would bring over more and more clothes. When Gerard suggested that Mikey should be included in the fun, Peter became angry and insisted that it had to be only them.
The dress up sessions became gradually more intimate. The outfits he brought with him became skimpier and more revealing. Peter continued to take photos of them both, but he no longer even tried to put on any feminine items himself. He began to touch Gerard, while telling him how pretty he looked.
It would be pointing out the obvious to say that at this point, Gerard stopped having any sort of fun -- even if he pretended that he was for fear of repercussions. Soon the touching turned into flat out groping, rubbings of his inner thighs underneath the red plaid skirt that Peter liked so much.
There were times when Gerard thought to wake Mikey up. Scream for Mikey to come help him. Yet Peter did not hesitate to threaten him on numerous occasions. He would threaten him physically, and mentally, sometimes saying that he would tell everyone that this was all Gerard's idea. That Gerard had wanted this. And Gerard would back away, being what he was...
Just a scared child.
Then there was the one night where Peter sent Mikey to bed a bit earlier than usual, and Gerard already knew he was in trouble.
Shortly after he forced Gerard into some lingerie. Light pink and black were its colors. It had tiny pink bows on each strap. There were garter belts at the end of it, to which connected some lacy leggings that had a large black bow at the top of each, where the garters connected. Panties were absent, even though the set must have come with a pair.
Gerard only remembered this outfit particularly well, for it was the one Peter stole his innocence in.
To this day, Gerard felt partly to blame for the whole thing happening. He should have fought harder. He should have kicked and screamed and ran, rather than whimper pathetically as he did, shaking his head whispering "No, no, no..." over and over again. He should have punched him, thrown objects at him, woken Mikey up, instead of trembling beneath him, tears brimming at his eyes. Just praying he would stop soon.
He should have told someone.
Instead, frozen in his fear, silent and shocked, Gerard kept his mouth shut. Peter was then invited to come into their home many more times. Gerard tried to portray to their mother that he disliked Peter, making up any excuse he could that was not the truth. Donna however shrugged it off as Gerard being his "usual antisocial self".
Gerard was then trapped with Peter for many more nights of ravishment and violation. He would then only dress Gerard in lingerie, and gave Gerard his first lessons in the application of make up. He would put eyeliner, eye shadow, blush, and concealer on his face. The concealer was for the bruises, which happened when Gerard would even begin to try to struggle. Then he would fuck Gerard, who would be dressed in his masterpiece, and talk over his cries and pleads for him to stop.
"You're such a pretty little doll."
"No... Peter, please..."
"So fucking pretty."
"Fuck... it hurts so fucking much... please..."
"And you're all mine, pretty little doll..."
"PETER! PLEASE! STOP!"
Gerard turned around to see Frank standing behind him. He suddenly became aware of the present day and age once more, and he felt the memories fade into the back of his mind once again. Frank was looking at him impatiently.
"We got five minutes till show time, let's go! Mikey and Ray are already by the steps!" Frank urged, already beginning to walk away.
"Right." Gerard nodded, checked the mirror once more, and said, "Hey Frank?"
"Oh my god, Gerard, what?" Frank spun around, clearly annoyed.
"Do I look pretty?"
Frank's expression softened slightly and he gave Gerard a small smile. "Of course you do, Gerard. Just like always."
Gerard smiled at him, and Frank left towards the stage steps. Facing the mirror again, he teased his hair a bit more and puckered his lips, making sure he would look pretty for the public tonight.
Just like always.