First thing I want to say is, happy birthday to Gerard Way!!! Hope he has a great day today. Secondly is congratulations to Frank and Jamia for their new born son :3
It's been such a long weekend. The problem with Edith and Linda have been swirling in my mind at the same time and I get a head ache every night. I'm just glad Edith is alright now. Now what I can't stop thinking about Is how much I've screwed with Linda! Fuck! She probably hates me! I can't ever say sorry. I'll probably die with this guilt.
Talking about Linda, there she is. Talking to Mr. Hendricks the school principal. She looks so sweet and harmless. I'm such a douche for hurting a great friend like she was. I can't believe myself...
Oh there she is, behind them is my sweetheart, Rebecca. Here she comes with the sweetest smile I've seen so far. She's so beautiful and sweet. She's the only one that helps me forget my problems. I feel like, I can't trust her with anything. I have a feeling she's the one...
"hey my love." she greets me adding a kiss.
"hey beautiful. How've you been? Seems like I haven't talked to you in a while."
"yeah, you being busy with your friends has split us apart for some time. I've been alright. I'm glad we're together again." she leans forward and kisses me like she has never done before. It's full of passion and lust which makes it perfect. She moved her hand down to my chest. She lets go and gives me a smile patting my chest. Is this the best day or what?!
I think, I think I might be falling for Bob. Well, it's not that I never liked him. I did have a tiny crush on him in the beginning but it kinda faded away. I was only with him because I wanted to get Linda mad. She deserves it for taking my guy back in 8th grade. I dislike her cause of that. But, he's just attracted me lately. The day we were all in Jade's house. How he looked so, caring and determined to find his friend. That was just sexy in a way. And he was dressed differently that day. He was wearing a leather jacket with a grey hoodie reading, "New Jersey 1987" black skinnies and black Vans. His hair has grown. He brushes it forwards now. He has a fringe and its shaved from the sides. Kinda like Frank's, before he cut his fringe. He just looks so much sexier now. Nah, I don't think I like Bob, I just lust him..
Great, I was about to go over and talk to Bob but Becky just had to come. I bet she kissed him like that just cause I'm around. She just doesn't know when to stop. Just like Victoria with Eddie and Gerard. They're full of the same kind of venom. How disgusting!
How in the world do I still have eyes for him? He doesn't even bother to come and talk to me! He even avoids me! What in the world is that!? But I can't stop loving or caring about him. I've known him since the 7th grade and we had become really good friends. I trusted him and he trusted me. I can't let go of that. We might not talk anymore but, I still very much love him as a friend and a lover.
Gosh, you have no idea how much I want to go over and talk to Eddie. She's all alone, listening to her iPod by the tree she's always at during lunch breaks. Why is she alone? Where is Gerard? Alright Henry, c'mon. Grab your balls and go talk to her. Okay, here we go...
"Eddie?" I stood over her and she didn't notice me. She just kept jamming to her iPod. I kneeled down and poked her. She opened one eye and when she noticed it was me, she rolled her eyes and plugged out her headphones.
"what do you want?"
"I just want to talk.."
She sat up and put pause on her iPod.
"how are you feeling?"
"are you healthy?"
"what did your boyfriend do?"
"Henry, where are you going with this conversation? What are you talking about?"
"well, after I dropped you off home, I didn't hear anything of you anymore."
"dropped me off home? Wh -what are you talking about?"
Is she acting or does she really not remember..
"um, well, I dont know how to put this. That one night, you were doing drugs in the alley.."
"how do you know about this?!"
She got off the ground and was standing on her knees. It almost seemed as she was blowing fire from her nose.
"I -I uh, I found you and took you home. You fell unconscious while I was carrying you home and, I found one of your friends outside. He carried you up to your apartment and his girlfriend, I guess, told me thank you for finding you. I guess you were missing for a couple of hours. You don't remember?"
"wow, I had no idea. I'm sorry but I don't remember any of this and no one told me how I got home or anything. All I remember is waking up in the hospital. So it was you who found me?"
"some dark alley close to the Farmers Market."
"who was I with?"
"Danny and Kaitlin"
"what was I doing with them?! I don't even talk to them! Oh gosh, I think I might be going crazy. I need help"
"Eddie, you're not crazy. You just, weren't feeling good."
"well, thank you Henry. If it weren't for you, who knows what would have become of me."
Than, the moment I've been waiting for came. She leaned forward and gave me a caring hug. She was still on her knees. She wrapped her arms on my neck and I felt tense. I didn't move. At all. I came down from heaven when I saw a bee flying around and that's when I wrapped my arms around her back. It was a friendly hug. She let go of me and looked straight at me. She sat back down on her butt.
"Henry, I know I said I had forgiven you but, I still felt the anger. You saved my life technically and you've showed me you are actually sorry and you've changed. I'm not angry at you anymore and I fully forgive you. Friends?" she extended her hand to me and I took it with much love.
A smile spread across my face with a tear as well.
"aww, don't cry." she wiped the tear of my cheek and gave me the most adorable smile.
"thank you Eddie, for not being angry at me anymore. I've been waiting for this moment for so long. Thank you." I extend my arms and she came towards me, giving me another friendly hug.
This pact, just took a whole weight off my chest and I think my heart was just waiting for this to happen to let her go. I know, for a fact, that if she would have hugged me before any of this happened, I know I would have wanted to kiss her so badly. But know, I really like this hug. I love her, as a friend. Nothing else. But I'll never forget that she was my first love...
Why is it that, I always catch Eddie and Henry talking? It's always me! I'm pretty sure other people see them as well but I see it in a different perspective because I know who Henry really is.
"hey Frank, have you seen Eddie?" Gerard came up behind me in the main office. I was looking out the big window. I was in there to get my daily sign in because I've been ditching so much that now I have to get this signed by all my teachers. I have no idea why Gerard is in here though.
"she's over there talking to some guy."
"oh, Henry. I haven't seen that guy in a while. I'm gonna go say hi."
"wait!" I yelled before he stepped out. How does he know him?
"oh um, why are you in here?"
I rather not ask. I don't want to seem suspicious.
"cause I saw you and I wanted to ask you where is Eddie."
"oh, okay. Have you seen Emma?"
"yeah, she's by the girls restroom."
Gerard walked out. What was I doing in here? Oh yeah, my daily paper..
Eddie and I started to catch up on things. How were we doing and why did I move here and stuff like that. It was like old times, when I had barely met her and we were friends. It felt nice to start over.
"hey hey! What's up guys?" a voice came from behind me. I turned around. It was Gerard.
"hey Gee, why didn't you call me this morning?"
Eddie said to Gerard and hit him on his thigh as he sat down criss-cross.
"ouch! My mom was bitching at me for always drinking too much coffee in the morning and leaving my boxers in the restroom. I didn't have time cause she made me clean up."
"oh, it's fine then."
"oh sorry Henry, didn't get the chance to say hi properly cause some PRETTY GIRL over here didn't let me. What's up?"
We did our bro hand shake as Eddie hit Gerard again.
"t'sup man. What days are you working now? Haven't seen you."
"Monday, Thursday and Sunday"
"oh I have Saturday Wednesday and Tuesday."
"oh I hate those days cause its the most full."
"yup. Good luck man. So, what were you guys talking about?"
Eddie did her nose wiggle again.
"we were just talking about school and stuff." she replied.
"oh, boring. Now that I'm here, we could talk about something better. So,"
"I'm sorry, to interrupt you but, I have to go." I got off the ground and grabbed my back pack.
"oh alright. See you in 3rd period." Gerard said.
"bye Henry." Eddie said and shot me a sweet smile. How I love seeing that.
As soon as I walked in one of the buildings, the morning bell rang and my class is on the other side of the school. Great. I hurried to my locker that was in this building and tried to hurry back to my class. I turned the corner into a half empty hallway. And that's when I saw her, the girl form my 8th period class. God, I wish I knew her name but I don't. She was at her locker texting. She's beautiful. Her short blonde hair with the blue streak on her bangs. Her style. It's like punk-ish. I always see her with those school girl skirts and ripped panty-hose and a leather or denim jacket. But today, she's wearing ripped denim jeans with bright pink converse and leather vest. Her tank top was the English flag. She's beautiful. I walked by her slowly. She looked up at me for just a second but then turned away. The late bell rang and that's when I decided to walk by faster. I wish I had an excuse to talk to her..
"hey!" I heard someone call out. I turned around and it was her. She was calling me. Oh gees.
"yeah?" I replied.
"you're in my 8th period class right?"
I can't believe she remembers me.
"do you know what was the homework?"
"um, I think it was page 34 and 37 in the work book."
"alright thanks. What's your name?"
"Hi I'm Linda."
she extended her arm and I shook her hand nervously.
"nice meeting you." I said.
"nice meeting you too."
"well, I have to go. I'll see you around."
she smiled before turning around and turning the corner. I stood there, silently. I know if someone was around, I bet they'd think I'm a weirdo for just standing around looking awkward. When I realized what I was doing, I turned around on my heel and walked to my class.
I can finally talk to Her without thinking of Eddie. Goodbye Eddie, hello Linda...
We are entering second semester now. Senior year is going to get more complicated. I've already applied to colleges but haven't received the conformation from the college Christa and I are planning on going to together. She already got accepted. I'm afraid I won't. We are both determined to go there no matter what but, she said that if I don't get in she won't go. I don't want her to stop her dream just cause of me. She needs to live her dream of being a professional violinist. In my case, well, I don't want to play guitar professionally and play like, classical music and what not. I want to be in a rock band. It'll be so fun and epic. But I don't know who to ask to be in my band if I make one. I'll probably not even get famous and fail. Oh well. There goes my dream.
My phone rang in the middle of class and my teacher told me to put it away. Crap, I forgot to put vibrate again.
"okay, I'll turn it off!" I told the teacher but instead, I decided to read my new text message from Christa.
"I'm sorry Ray but I'm going to have flake on you today. I'm wont be able to make it to the movies because I have a violin audition :( sorry babe, I'll make it up to you. Xoxo"
Just what I thought. This semester is going to be difficult for me and Christa. We're going to be busy as hell.
during nutrition, I was walking towards Mikey's locker when I bumped into my flute teacher.
"Jade! Guess what?"
He said walking towards me holding a paper.
"what is it Mr. Spence?"
"I got you the scholarship."
"follow me into my office."
I walked behind Mr. Spence. I can't belive he was able to get me the scholarship. This is an amazing opportunity for my career!
We walked and he closed the door behind us.
"take a seat."
I sat down and he started to type in something in his computer.
"so, I was able to get the scholarship like I told you. But, making this work perfectly will be a little difficult. You'll have to work your ass off if you want to get in the school in Europe."
"god, how hard?"
"very! Everyone is fighting for this scholarship. You mess up and your out! So Jade, be careful. Work as much as you can on your scales and arpeggios. And, work on a piece you'll have to audition for this late Fall."
"do I get to choose the piece?"
"I'm not sure. I'll check up on that for you but please Jade, I want you to get this. Work as hard as you can."
"I will Mr. Spence I have to go now, my boyfriend is waiting for me."
He had a mischievous smile on.
"haha, I see your going out with one of the Way brothers. Pretty good, not bad not bad."
My teacher and I have a cool bond. He's like a really cool friend even though he's my teacher.
I walked out and hurried to where Mikey told me to meet him at.
"hey!" I yelled running down the hallway where Mikey was standing reading a book.
"hey beautiful!" he put the book back in his back pack and we kissed and I added a hug from all the excitement I have in me right now.
"whoa, what's up?"
"Mikey! You would not believe!"
"I got the scholarship I was telling you about!!!" I said jumping up and down. I took a look at his expression and he widened his eyes and pulled me into a tight hug.
"Jade! Thats great! I'm so proud of you!! We should celebrate today! C'mon, I'll take you out anywhere you want."
I let go of the hug so I can face him.
"I'm sorry Mikey, I can't today. This scholarship is very important and I have to work really hard to get it fully. I have to practice as much as I can."
"that's perfectly fine Jade. Do what you need to do. We'll go out some other day."
We kissed again and walked over to the others holding hands.
Today, Frank and I complete 7 months together. It's Been a really nice relationship between him and me. I love him so much.
I was waiting for him by his locker when I see him turn the corner carrying a book in hand and a smile across his face.
"Hey MJ" he said with a grin before opening his locker.
"hey" I replied.
He closed his locker and smiled again.
"ready to go?"
I returned the smile and answered.
"yes." he grabbed my hand and we continued to walk down the hall.
"where are we going Frank?"
"where ever you'd like. It's our day today."
"where would you like to go?"
"where ever you want."
"let's go to the beach. Like our first date."
"alright. I love you." he pulled me to a stop and looked me straight in the eye. He leaned forward and kissed me.
"I love you too." I said pulling away and we continued walking down the hall.
I dont know what's wrong with MJ. She's seems happy but there's something else's thats bothering her. I can tell. She's my MJ.
I don't know but I hope I'll be able to control myself at the beach. Emma looks too hot today. It's so normal but I find it hot. She's wearing her normal black leggings and black tank top with a red and black pok-a-dotted Cardigan and black vans. Her hair scene as usual but just black. She dyed it recently. And her lips, a kind of dark red. It's beautiful.
I'm ready to have an amazing afternoon with MJ.
As I walked back home, I noticed a couple walking by the park. I was really bored so I took notice on everything. I observed them for a while and then I noticed it was Linda. Who is this guy? I decided to spy on them. Just for fun.
Dammit, this is the closest I can get and I can't hear anything.
They were seating down on the swings and I was 2 trees behind them. Oh well, I'll just observe.
They don't really do much. They're just talking. No body contact at all. Just plain talking. Oh crap! They're leaving!
"it was nice talking Henry. I'm glad you asked."
"it was nice talking to you too. I'll see you tomorrow."
He leaned forwards and gave me a kiss on the cheek and a hug. I felt my face turn hot. His face turned red.
We walked opposite ways. I can't believe I never actually paid attention to Henry. He's, very cute and polite. I'm so glad we were put into partners today in 8th period. We had to do a partner project and Henry and I got along so well. After class was when he asked me to have a "stroll in the park" with him. So adorable.
But I still can't seem to get Bob out of my head. I love Bob but he doesn't like me back. He's so rude about it too. I can't believe it. I should just give myself a chance with someone else and forget about Bob...
"Linda!" I turned around to see who was calling me. Unfortunately it was Bob running to me. My heart skipped a beat when I saw him.
"hey Linda." he said when he caught up to me, catching his breath.
"hey" I'm not to fond of being around you at the moment.
"ok look, I know you might be mad-"
"might?!" I interrupted with anger.
"ok, I guess you are mad but, I just want to say I'm sorry."
Oh Bob, I forgive you! I love you now kiss me!
"it's about time!" I said and walked away.
"Linda wait!" he caught my arm and made me face him.
"Linda please, forgive me. I swear I did not mean what I said in a bad way. Please let me explain."
"fine! But you better buy me dinner!"
"whatever you'd like"
Gosh, these rehearsals are becoming a pain in the ass. Black Swan is taking forever to come!
"Lady's that was beautiful! Great Job Edith! Ok, can we start from the part with the white swan and the prince."
All the corps de ballet stepped off the stage and the whole dance floor was left to me and Carlos. I have become very comfortable dancing with Carlos and he has become comfortable with me too. At first, I felt a bit nervous because, this guy was trying to hit on me. But now, we're just really good friends...
"excellent work! The bond between you guys is perfect! I'm glad I picked you two." Ms. Joyet clapped and pranced over to the speakers with joy.
"alright, now the rest of the dancers, step on stage and start from where the swans swim on the lake. Edith and Carlos, you guys are welcome to go home. We're done with you two for the day. Well done." I went around the dance floor to the exit door when Ms. Joyet called us back in again. Carlos and I walked over to Ms. Joyet.
"I completely forgot. On the day of the performance, there's going to be a famous Ballet dance company from Canada coming all the way down here. I'm informing you two first because you guys are heading out now. I'll inform the class after class but, I want you two to impress them. So keep practicing to make the crowd go wild. Specially the company directors."
"I'm pretty sure we'll do a great job huh Eddie."
"you got that right!" we high fived including Ms. Joyet and then we walked out. I'm so excited for the performance. It's going to be the best ever!
I hate Eddie so much. I just want to ruin her once and for all. But I just haven't had the chance to talk to Gerard. He always seems to runaway from me. I think it's really immature. Forget the past already gosh! I will show him the picture sooner or later wether he likes it or not.
So class ended and Ms. Joyet announced there will be a dance company from Canada coming to watch us. They sure are waisting their time because Edith sucks balls! I bet I could do a much better job. I think this is what Ms. Joyet, Carlos and Edith were talking about before they left. I remember back when we were friends she told me her dream was to dance ballet professionally for a few years. Maybe that's why she seemed excited. I just want to ruin her and Gerard but this will be harder than I thought..
What if, what if I show Gerard the picture on performing night? Hmm..