(#) japulapu 2012-06-12 01:26:40 PM
Hello. I though you were affected by chronic illness. I really missed your work and was super excited to read this. Now onto the first chapter. To be honest, I didn't like it too much. It dragged a bit and the dialouge at the end, even though it brought out the essence of character, it wasn't very natural. You did, however, have a strong start. It was powerful and meaningful. The plot was interesting, which encourages the reader to, well, keep reading. The second chapter I enjoyed a lot more. It moved faster, it had hints of humour and was on the whole more appealing. I really like the idea and the theme so far and I'm looking forward to more chapters. The language and grammar was, as usual, spectacular and no mistakes I could see. Your style of writing is distinctive and I quite liked all the elements of it. I really missed your work. You don't know how hard it is to find good writing. I must commend you on how well you write with no prior topic. Original ff is always harder. Excuse any mistakes in this enormous review. Autocorrect is being a bitch. Can't wait for an update.