Jared writes a letter to the love of his life Gerard in his sadness.
I'm watching the rain fall right now. It's so dreary here in York without you. I wish you were here, your hands interlaced in mine and that perfect smile on your face. The beauty of all my possessions, of the house you left me in, none of it can compare to the way I feel whenever I'm with you.
Will it sound too extreme if I say that I'm nothing without you? If I say that love had no definition until I saw you walk out from that rain, an umbrella in hand, trying to figure out the streets out here? I want you back here. You only with your dark hair and those piercing brown eyes. Why did you have to leave? Didn't any of it mean as much to you as it did to me?
You're all I think about. You laying back on the grass of those fields you loved to visit, twirling a dandelion between your fingers. I told you your smile was breathtaking and you would laugh and tell me I was too much of a romantic. Those days felt unreal, like a dream. You were the only man I would ever love.
There are so many memories that I leaf through day after day, agonizing night after agonizing night. How am I supposed to survive without you? You were gentle hearted, sweet, beautiful. The one man that turned my world upside down and made me see the world differently. You changed my life.
The way the rain falls now reminds me of those tears you cried the last time we saw each other. You told me Summer was over and we couldn't be together anymore. A fling is what you called it. I know it was more than that- to the both of us.
The moon streaks silver through the window panes. You used to stand by that same window when you were here. Your skin glowing, the smell of your bath still on your skin, and your clothes discarded on the bed. I would watch you as you stood there so peacefully, contemplative and serene. I loved the way the moonlight danced on your ass. The way the silver light illuminated your skin, making it glow like a pearl.
What did you do with those days? Why did you throw them away?
I'm not even sure if you'll respond to this but in the ache in my heart I pray that you do. My Gerard, please tell me you'll come back to me. Tell me you miss me as I miss you. Tell me anything just not another goodbye. I need you, I miss you, I love you...
Yours always and forever...until the end of time