What might the Joker have been thinking as he was being taunted during the final battle in Return of the Joker?
SUMMARY: What might the Joker have been thinking as he was being taunted during the final battle in /Return of the Joker/?
NOTE: Since there are two versions of the movie Return of the Joker (the edited version and the original version), I wrote this so it could fit either one. Still, it's rating of PG (or K+) is just to be safe.
/"Making Fun of the Joker,"/
Dedicated to BiteMeTechie, MyDirtyLittleSecret and SnowyBlackOwl for beta-reading this fic.
The Joker felt he was on a roll.
Tim Drake might have been able to "kill" him forty or so years ago back in the abandoned Arkham Asylum building, but the Joker managed to preserve himself deep within Tim Drake himself. Now, all this time into the future, he was back and ready to get even with some people who were really overdue.
It was one of the things with the Joker liked best about himself: He was good at getting the last laugh.
"You're out of your league, McGinnis. I know every trick the original Batman and Robin knew at their peak."
"Maybe... but you don't know a thing about me," Batman - sorry, Terry McGinnis shot back - shrugging off the effects of having been thrown into a table.
"You?" the Joker responded incredulously. "What's to know? You're a punk. A rank amateur. A costumed errand boy taking orders from a senile old man." Rolling up his sleeves, he then added, "Still, if it's a-whoopin' you're a-wantin'..."
It was then that McGinnis bolted to the door. "That's right," the Joker taunted. "Better to run and save yourself. It's about your speed..."
But to his surprise, the punk closed the door and ripped off the handle, ensuring that no one got in or out, or at least that way.
"Let's dance, Bozo."
Ooh, this out to be fun, the Joker thought with glee.
After some punches were thrown, McGinnis flipped back out of the way, but the Joker heard him whisper something: "He's tough. Any suggestions, boss?"
The Joker still stood his ground, ready for the next round. Yeah, right, he mentally scoffed. Even the great Batman himself couldn't stop me back then. What could he and his costumed errand boy /possibly do to me now?/
Then McGinnis muttered something else: "Wait... I like to talk, too."
As if that would do you a lot of good...
Then the Joker lunged into his next set of attacks.
However, he was completely caught off guard for when the punk held him and slammed his knee into his gut.
"What are you doing?"
ARGH, that hurts!
"The real Batman would never - oorgh!"
"Told ya you didn't know me."
After a moment of recovery, the Joker had collected his thoughts again and was ready to go.
"Can't say the same for you," was the taunting reply.
Wait, WHAT? the Joker thought one moment. The next moment, he had run into the table and banged his head against it.
"Imprudent brat. Who do you think you're talking to?" he hissed.
"Not a comedian, I'll tell you that."
OH, that tears it... ah, there's my gun!
"Shut your mouth!" he snapped.
"The real Batman never talked to you much, did he?" the errand boy called up from the rafters. "That's probably why you were so fixated on him."
The Joker gave a small cry of pain as the gun was dashed from his hand. "Don't play psychoanalyst with me, boy!"
Besides, your boss has enough issues of his own, or did you not notice? And I'm /not in the mood for some Freudian field day here.../
"Oh, I don't need a degree to figure you out." The next moment, the lights were killed.
As the beam from the defense satellite came ever closer, the Joker began to feel very trapped for one of the few moments in his life.
"The real reason you kept coming back was you never got a laugh out of the old man."
The Joker now felt trapped in his own memories as well. This seemed just a bit too much like that night where he taunted Batman just before he was subsequently killed right after that.
Now, however, he wasn't the one doing the taunting.
"I'm not hearing this..."
"Get a clue, clowny. He's got no sense of humor. He wouldn't know a good joke if it bit him in the cape." Then, as a follow-up to that, "Not that you ever had a good joke."
Now that was an insult to what the Joker considered to be his life's work. Heck, even before that, when he tried his hand as a comedian, yet failed at that. But this new Batman's words felt just too true for his own comfort.
"Shut up... SHUT UP!"
Why does this door have to be so heavy!? Why would anyone running a /candy factory years ago have such heavy doors at all!?/
"I mean, joy buzzers, squirting flowers, LAME! Where's the A-material? Make a face, drop your pants, SOMETHING!"
Yes, so I can wring out your scrawny little neck!
"You make me laugh... but only 'cause I think you're kind of pathetic."
Blood... pressure... rising...
And then the laughter began.
HIS kind of laughter!
"So you fell in a tank of acid, got your skin bleached and decided to become a super villain. What, you couldn't get work as a rodeo clown?"
URGE... TO KILL... RISING...
Even more laughter.
Ah, some grenades when I need them!
"Don't you dare laugh at me!"
As if you could POSSIBLY know what I've gone through...
Now there was the kind of laughter as though the punk was listening to the best joke ever. As though the Joker wasn't even that much of a threat to take seriously!
"Why? I thought the Joker always wanted to make Batman laugh!"
What!? You think /you're Batman!?/
That was the final straw as the Joker's anger truly erupted.
"YOU'RE NOT BATMAN!" he shouted.
The Joker was truly fuming now.
All these years, he wanted to take down the true Batman, one Bruce Wayne. He wanted to have the honor of taking him down, having him laugh like a lunatic before he was finally killed. He didn't want to merely take advantage of some misfortune which Batman may have had, but he wanted to prove that he was every bit as powerful as the Dark Knight, if not even more powerful.
Merely surviving all this time wasn't enough for the Joker. He wanted to be the one to terminate Bruce Wayne, the real Batman, once and for all, not some new substitute.
As he pinned down the so-called "new" Batman, he removed the mask and laughed.
Finally, he could kill this brat once and for all!
And once that was done, he would kill the real Batman.
And neither of them would ever make fun of the Joker ever again.
As McGinnis struggled to breathe, the Joker taunted him in a sing-song voice, "I can't hear you..."
"Ha - ha!" McGinnis ground out, raising his hand with a familiar device on it...
And the next moment, the Joker felt excruciating pain from his neck.
The Joker remembered all the times he had electrocuted people, and now here he was being electrocuted.
That's not funny! he thought angrily before he realized something else.
He could literally feel it crumble - feel himself crumble - as he realized that very moment he was doomed.
NO! he thought with all his remaining resolve. Nobody makes fun of the Joker -!
And the next moment, he ceased to be, considerably overdue to get what had been coming to him for years.
A/N: So, how was this? Personally, I think I did a good job with this. One of my favorite scenes in the movie is how Batman (Terry) is able to taunt the Joker and throw him off.
Also, if you liked this fic, I also have a few other plans for DCAU fics which are rather Joker-centric: "Dealing with the Joker" (which takes place during the animated movie /Mask of the Phantasm/), as well as one called "Aftershocks" (where other heroes and people from the DC Animated Universe, such as the Justice League, Static and Gear, etc. react to the Joker's fate and Robin's ordeal).
Thanks for reading this! -Quillian