“Hello?” I say with a yawn.
“Hey Johanna! Its Ray is Gerard there?” Ray says spunkily from the other end.
“No he is still sleeping”
“Oh, he might as well live there ya know! He is never here *sigh* have him give me a call when he wakes up” and with that he hangs up. Gee someone is cranky . I put the phone down and walk back into the bedroom and see Gerard still sleeping. I smile at him he just looks so peaceful. I walk into the master bathroom and look at myself in the mirror and I look like hell. My make up is smeared and my hair looks like a tornado went through it. I decide it is time to take a shower.
I take off the clothes Gerard put on me last night. A pair of pajama bottoms and one of his shirts. And hop into the shower. I let the hot water run over my body for a while before going on with the normal shower duties. Even in the shower I can’t stop smiling. I love Gerard. I love him I love him I love him! And last night when he was sweet enough that he held my hair back and rubbed my back was so sweet . Today I am asking him to move in with me. I hear the bathroom door open and peek from behind the curtain and see Gerard standing in front of the sink.
“Good morning” I say cheerfully.
“Good morning” he says groggily back. “You’re very cheerful this morning considering last night” I put my head back into the shower and wash out the conditioner.
“Meh well I am just really happy” I say running my fingers through my hair.
“Good” I hear him turn the sink on as I turn the water to the shower off, I grab the towel hanging from the rack and wrap it around me and step out of the shower. Gerard is brushing his teeth but stops when he sees me and just looks me up and down. I bite my lip and look down at my feet and walk past him and into the bedroom and quickly get dressed.
He comes into the bedroom his pajama bottoms hanging low on his waste and his hair a mess. He looks damn sexy. He walks over to me and gives me a kiss. I feel the grin come back on my face. Gerard smiles a crooked smile.
“You’re so beautiful” he whispers.
“You’re so handsome” I whisper back. He kisses me again. Then walks over to the side of the bed and sits down.
“Where are my clothes?” He asks.
“Oh I washed them they should be in the dryer” I say pointing in the direction of the laundry room. He raises an eyebrow at me.
“You washed my laundry?” -Gerard
“Yeah I mean I don’t want you to wear dirty clothes and stuff….” –Me
“I could’ve gone back to my house and gotten clean clothes”-Gerard
“Yeah but you’ve spent almost every night over here for the past month and well I wanted you to have clean clothes while you’re here…”-Me
“Jo you don’t have to do my laundry it’s not like we are living together” He says standing up and going to the laundry room. I get up and follow him. He leans down and opens the dryer and pulls out a t-shirt and a pair of pants. Well here it goes…all or nothing.
“Do you want to live here…with me?” I shyly ask. Gerard stands straight up and look at me with happy eyes,
“What? I mean…..we’ve only been….but I have been,,,,,of course I’ll move in!” He exclaims and runs up to me and gives me a kiss. I kiss him back wrapping my arms around his neck, I can feel his smile through out our kiss. We pull away and he is grinning from ear to ear and so am I .
“I’ll call Ray and Mikey and let them know! I don’t have much stuff I can probably move in one car trip” He says excitedly.
The rest of the afternoon and part of the evening we move Gerard into my place. He doesn’t have much just few dressers, a couple gaming systems and games, a lot of art stuff, and paintings. I finish handing the last of his paintings and look around the place. It really is OUR place now. I smile as I look around. I walk into the bedroom and see Gerard putting stuff into the closet. I sneak up behind him and put my arms around him. He jumps a little startled but then turns around and looks down at me and gives me a kiss.
“I’m so glad you’re here” I say snuggling my head into this chest. He puts his chin on the top of my head and rubs my back.
“Me too” he responds. I take a deep breath and take in his smell and get butterflies. “Well I have to go get ready for the show tonight” He says pulling away from me. I frown, well this moment is ruined. “You going to come?” he asks hopefully. I sigh and think about work tomorrow, I really cant afford to go to work hung over tomorrow I have a lot of surgeries to do. I guess I can go and not drink.
“Yeah sure thing!” I say happily. He kisses me again.
“I don’t know what I would do if you weren’t there Jo” I let a grin escape my lips. “So I’ll see you there around 8:00?” He questions. I nod.
“See you then, have fun warming up” I kiss his nose. He grabs his jacket off of the bed.
“You’re the best” He says kissing my head before walking towards to door. I watch him leave and instantly feel lonely.
I walk into the living room and see Pickles sprawled out on the floor chewing on a squeak toy while Batman is wondering around on the couch. I sit down and he comes and stretches out on my lap begging for some attention. I giggle at him and pet him and he purrs. Maybe I wont feel so lonely when he is gone because I have these guys. I force the idea of him leaving in a month out of my head, but it keeps creeping back and I feel the need to drink. I walk into the kitchen and open the fridge and see a case of beer. I go to grab it but then pull back remember last night. I sigh and close the fridge door and decide to escape all of this worry with reading a good book.
The time comes to leave and I call a cab and arrive to the bar on time. I decide to sit in the back and watch. The bartender puts a drink in front of me and I see it is the one from last night. My stomach turns into knots remembering puking. I just ignore that it is even there. The show begins and right away I stand up and wave my arms showing Gerard I am here. He looks over at me and waves causing several faces in the crowd to look over at me. I just shrug.
The show is going the way it usually does, same songs, same order, and same everything but still good. My subconscious soon takes over and before I know it, I have drunken the drink the bartender gave me, and when I catch myself all I can think is SHIT. But I do feel good, it isn’t as strong as yesterday so that’s good isn’t it?
Once the show is done Gerard comes over to me again and gives me kiss and orders himself a beer. He looks at me and then the empty glass in front of me.
“You’re really drinking that shit again?” he asks in an irritated tone. I shrug.
“Johanna that shit fucked you up last night and you have work tomorrow” he says sternly. Since when am I child?
“I know. I justhadone its not big deal” I slur a little. Gerard glares at me then at the bartender.
“You served her this shit again didn’t you?” He asks angrily. The Brown haired man nods and smiles and Gerard looks like he is about to lose it.
“Its not a big deal” I repeat.
“Lets get you home” Gerard says standing up and taking my hand. I stumble out of the bar with him and wait on another cab. He looks furious.
“Why are you so mad? Sowhatigot drunk and *hiccup* I have work tomorrow I will be fine. You get high all the time” I hiss.
He looks stunned at me. Then just shakes his head. The cab pulls up and we get inside silent the whole time. We get home and I stumble into the house and go into the bedroom. Gerard follows. I lay down on the bed and try to get the room to stop spinning.
“I’m sorry I said that, I just don’t like you getting that drunk” Gerard says sitting next to me putting his hands on my legs.
I smile and peek up at him, there are 4 of him again I respond “I didn’t mean what I said either, I’m sorry” I close my eyes again but this time I feel Gerard press his lips on mine.
“Get some sleep baby” He pulls the blankets over me and I drift into a deep sleep.
The next day at work is hectic, and not to mention 10 times worse because I am hung over and ten times worse than that because it is hectic making me want to drink again, so during my lunch I go and take a few drinks for the bottle in my car and relax. This is really starting to get out of control.
I arrive home and smell something cooking and see Gerard is laying out plates for us to eat. I smile at the image and sit down at the table.
“So how was your day?” Gerard asks giving me a kiss. “Never mind I am assuming very hectic by the taste of vodka” he sets a plate of meatloaf and mashed potatoes and vegetables in front of me. I grab a little bit of everything and start eating.
“Yup!” I respond to his question stuffing my face with mashed potatoes. “what did you do today?” I ask.
“Just worked on some songs, drew a little bit” he says serving himself. I nod.
“Thanks for dinner it is delicious” I compliment. Gerard smiles a crooked smile and I go weak in the legs.
“Anything for you” He responds sending my heart rate up. I gaze into his hazel eyes and get lost like I always do. I really do love this man.
Gerard and I spend the rest of the evening cuddled up on the couch watching CSI and other shows laughing and making out and staying sober. And that is all I could ever want. I am falling more and more in love with him each day.