I watched as the situation changed drastically, the air in the room becoming hotter.
[A/N: I apologize in advance for the changes of POV- I just wanted to better portray character emotions.]
(Third Person POV)
“Lisa? Yeah, it’s been a while. Is Kacy there with you? No, no… I just- she just wanted to have a little fun and take a road trip. I forgot where she said. I don’t think- I don’t know. Yeah, okay. Call me if she shows up there. Thank you. Bye.” The conversation was short, and Lisa was too excited to question the situation.
Brendon sighed heavily, looking at Spencer’s number. She couldn’t be there. He couldn’t believe that. He couldn’t put himself through that just yet. Instead he called Jon, who answered on the fourth ring. “What’s up?”
“Have you seen Kacy? Is she there?” Brendon couldn’t help but sound a little panicked. Kacy hadn’t come home and it was late in the morning now. She’d been gone all night. There hadn’t been any activity on their credit card or on her debit card. He just wanted to know that she was safe.
“No, but I saw her car at Spencer’s late last night when I was coming home.” No.
The breath was knocked from Brendon’s lungs, and he struggled for a few delicate moments before responding to Jon. “Great. Thanks.”
“Something wrong?” Jon instantly sounded concerned. “You don’t think… She wouldn’t do anything with Spencer man. She’s in love with you. You two are the perfect couple, and have been demonstrating it for the last six freaking years.” Jon thought he was helping Brendon feel better. He had no idea what he was really doing to Brendon’s emotions.
“Thanks, I’ll talk to you later.” Brendon decided to hang up before Jon could say anything else. He couldn’t handle anymore.
Spencer and Kacy.
The idea was like a nightmare to Brendon. He couldn’t deal with them ever being together. Was she fucking him? The thoughts running through his mind were vulgar and did nothing but tear him apart a little more.
“Are you sure I can’t talk you in to staying a little longer?” Spencer asked, making the bed look extremely alluring.
“I need to talk things through with Brendon. Um, last night I was sort of a wreck. Neither of us expected any of what happened… and now we should be able to discuss it like adults, I hope.” Kacy ran her fingers through her hair, trying to smooth it out. “I need to tell him what’s going to happen, even though I’m not really sure. This will be my first divorce.” Kacy laughed bitterly, “And one I really didn’t expect.”
“Hey, it’s okay.” Spencer could immediately tell that Kacy was about to cry. Her bottom lip began trembling and she closed her eyes, trying to shut the tears out. “It’s going to be okay. You’re strong enough to do this.”
“Am I?” Kacy wasn’t so sure.
“If there is one thing about you that hasn’t changed over all these years it’s your strength. You may have pushed it aside to do what you thought was right for Adam and Brendon… but it never disappeared. You’re a strong woman Kacy, and you can handle anything.” Spencer stared at Kacy, obvious love appearing in his eyes as he smiled kindly at her.
Kacy took a deep breath and nodded, “Okay, I can do this.” She whispered, before finally opening her eyes to look at Spencer. “Thank you Spencer. You’ve been my constant. You know that, right? You’re the reason I’m still even trying.”
The words touched Spencer, deeply. “And I’ll always be here.” Then he momentarily frowned, “Are you sure you don’t want me to come with?”
“I really think it would be better if I went alone. It’s going to be a mess, I’m sure of it. As much as I want to leave here thinking I’m going to have a grown up conversation… I know that things don’t always go as planned and this isn’t an easy subject to discuss.”
“You’re right but that gives me more reason to come along.” Spencer was beyond worried that Brendon would react badly to losing everything, who wouldn’t?
“Just stay put.” Kacy walked towards the bed, leaning down to plant a kiss upon Spencer’s soft lips. “I think I like you best right here.” She joked.
“Hurry back then.” Spencer pretended to pout, as Kacy walked from the room. He heard the jingle of her keys and jumped up immediately, unable to really let her go alone.
He cared too much about Kacy.
The heat was unbearable, and I felt as if I were sweating my composure off. The drive wasn’t far and most definitely was not long enough for me to re-capture the calm feeling I’d had back at Spencer’s. Things with Spencer had always been different like that though. Spencer had always made me feel safe. Spencer was more like the best friend, the one pushed to the back when he should be at the front. Brendon made me feel different. He was hot and made me feel alive, in an entirely different way. Brendon ignited the passion inside of me, while Spencer kept it going. It really was disturbing and made me wrong in so many ways but they worked like two sides of a coin- and sometimes I felt as if I needed them both. Maybe I was the one that was wrong all along. Maybe I was the one that should lose everything, I certainly deserved it.
Our home was beautiful. It was the perfect all American family home, the kind that you’d see in commercials. I’d fallen in love with it the moment I set my eyes on it and I was so glad that Adam would grow up in one place, with two happy parents. How wrong was I?
As I stepped out of my car the temperature dropped and I vaguely wondered why I hadn’t rolled the windows down, or turned the air conditioning on. Oh well, it was too late now. The car door shut behind me, making me inwardly wince. I didn’t even know what to expect, or how to feel. I’d calmed down. The anger wasn’t guiding me anymore. Now I was scared, and I was sad. I was losing something too. I was actually losing everything that Brendon was losing. His lie affected us both, all three of us…
The door was unlocked and the house was in the same state I remembered leaving it in the other night. There was broken glass in the hallway, picture frames barely hanging in place. “Brendon?” What if he was asleep?
I heard a sound from the kitchen and immediately went in search of Brendon, not expecting the foul stench of Jack Daniel’s to greet me. When did we get so much alcohol in our house? Neither of us were really drinkers.
“Good morning…” I awkwardly stopped in front of the counter, watching as Brendon dragged random items from the fridge. He looked half-dead, as if he hadn’t gotten any sleep. “Are you looking for something?” I had things pretty organized, so I was sure I could help find whatever it was he was looking for.
“Your heart.” Brendon snapped. “I’m sure it’s in here somewhere, unless you just threw it away.”
Any chance at having a mature adult conversation was obviously lost. “Can we talk?” Once again I felt nervous around him, like a small child. Where had my confidence gone? At least the anger gave me a way to speak up.
Brendon finally stopped searching the fridge as he turned to look at me, gazing at me in disgust. “Where were you last night?”
“I stayed with a friend.” It wasn’t a lie, not really.
“What friend? I was worried.”
“We have something a little more important than that to discuss I think.”
“I don’t think so.” I nervously kept my eyes on Brendon as he came around the counter, quickly approaching me. “I think I deserve to know whose bed my wife was keeping warm last night.” Now he sounded angry. Did he already know?
“Ex- I’m your ex.” I want to be anyway.
“Not yet.” Brendon snapped. “For now you still have my last name and my ring on your finger. You’re still my wife. I don’t see any divorce papers and I haven’t agreed to sign anything yet.”
“You can’t refuse to sign the papers once I get them drawn up.” He couldn’t, could he?
“Who did you sleep with last night?”
“It’s none of your business.” I snapped, putting as much attitude in to the words as I could manage. I did pretty well, for how confused I was feeling with the situation.
Brendon suddenly grabbed on to my arm, pulling me closer to him. “It is my business when my wife decides to whore herself out to the rest of my band mates.” Brendon hissed, through clench teeth.
“Let go of me.” I glared up at Brendon, knowing very well that he wouldn’t actually hurt me. It was just smoke and mirrors, some stupid show to try and frighten me… He wasn’t going to scare me though. “I haven’t ‘whored’ myself out to anyone.”
Brendon didn’t let go as he gazed in to my eyes, as if searching for the truth there. “Then why were you at Spencer’s last night?”
“I needed a place to stay.”
“This is your house. Why didn’t you stay here?”
“You know why I didn’t.”
“There is more than one bedroom. You didn’t have to sleep in another man’s bed. Do you really want to hurt me that badly? That’s sinking pretty fucking low Kacy.”
“You hurt me first.” It wasn’t the smartest or most elegant thing to say… but it was the only thing that came to mind and it was the truth. Brendon did hurt me. He really, really hurt me.
“Is that the game we’re playing?”
“We aren’t playing a game anymore Brendon, we lost. It’s over. The game is done.”
“It’s not.” Brendon snapped, his grip tightening on me until I cried out. He let go instantly but his expression didn’t change. “This isn’t over.”
“It is. We are.” I didn’t like hurting him. I might have been angry before and I still was but… hurting him never was my aim. “I’m sorry but I don’t want to be with you anymore.”
Brendon’s hand came down hard on the counter top as his face turned red, “It’s not over. I’m not going to let you leave me.” Brendon shook his head, his voice getting louder. I was worried that a neighbor would overhear us and I didn’t want that drama. “Especially not for Spencer!”
“I came here to talk about things… If you can’t do that then I’ll come back later.” I tried keeping my voice steady as I tried to overlook how much pain I was causing Brendon. When he lashed out at me it just made things harder. It just made the entire situation seem so heartless… It just made me feel so heartless.
I couldn’t focus on the reason I was leaving him. I couldn’t, even though I needed to. “You and Adam aren’t going anywhere.” Brendon aggressively informed me. “I’m not going to step away as Adam’s dad and I’m not going to let someone else fuck my wife.”
I just let him rant; knowing he needed to get it out, just as I’d needed to get everything out the night before. If you held the anger in you would explode, and neither of us could let that happen when we had a son to care for.
“Are you listening to me?” Brendon’s voice continued to rise as I listened to him, saying nothing. He picked up an apple from the counter and tossed it across the room, attempting to make himself feel better in any way that he could. It seemed he found something that helped because he continued to pick up random items, throwing them across the room as hard as he could.
Things broke. The shattering just added to the effect of our broken marriage, and our broken love. “I gave you everything!” Brendon yelled, now not even looking at me.
“You’re a whore! A fucking whore, fucking my friends!” Brendon screamed, until he was red in the face.
Suddenly the back door flew open and Spencer stepped inside, his own face red with anger. “That’s enough Brendon.” He snapped.
I watched as the situation changed drastically, the air in the room becoming hotter.
This wasn’t going to be good.