Phil calls PJ and Dan doesn't like what he hears. PJ and Phil are over, does that mean Dan has a chance?
Phil smiles and dials PJ number. He looks up at Dan, panicked. His eyes widen. “H-hey, Pee…”
Dan nodded at Phil and placed a little kiss on his cheek. “I’m here” he mouthed. He held onto Phil’s hand as he talked to PJ. Phil sobbed. “Pee I-… Australia… Dan… Bulimia… Yeah, again… please!”
Dan watched the conversation unfold. His face fell as he watched Phil break down. He didn’t like seeing the poor boy like this. He just hoped that Phil could get better soon.
“PJ, please!” Phil cries hard. “I’m in a hospital… How long..? Oh… Eating um…”
Dan was heart broken. “What’s wrong Phil?” Dan whispered. He was concerned for his new friend. He had never seen anyone in this state before.
Phil looks up at Dan. “He wants to know how long it’s been…” he whispers.
Dan was curious to find out as well, but he kept that to himself. He rubbed his thumb over the back of Phil’s hand. “You’re gonna have to tell him eventually Phil. He’s your boyfriend, I’d want to know if I was in his position. Just tell him when you’re ready.”
Phil nods. “Y-your right.” He lifts the phone to his ear. “Pee, don’t be mad… All I ask is you don’t be mad…” Phil waits. He nods. “Okay… you wanted to know how long.” Phil takes a deep breath. “7…”
7? 7 what? Days? Months? Dan’s mind was reeling. He rubbed Phil’s back trying to offer him some form of support and comfort.
Phil sobs. “Pee,” he listens. “We’ve been together 3 years… how many times have you seen me eat…?”
Dan couldn’t hold in his tears any more. His sobs racked his body. He couldn’t believe that the boy in front of him did this to himself.
Phil looks at Dan. “Pee, I know. I’m worthless. A fuck up.” He grabbed Dan’s waist. He pulled Dan closer to him.
Dan’s tears soaked into Phil’s skin. “Just do it Phil. He’s not worth it. You’re perfect, if he thinks you’re worthless he doesn’t deserve you.”
Phil nods. “Pee, where are you?” Phil listened. PJ yelled at Phil. “You worthless twat Phil! Don’t do what I think your doing! NO! No you little shit! Who’s going to love you? NO ONE!” Phil couldn’t function. His whole body froze over. “You’re right Pee…”
Dan couldn’t stand Phil talking about himself like that. He had heard PJ yelling through the phone and was appalled by the things he heard. He grabbed the phone off Phil. “Don’t you fucking dare talk to Phil like that! He is perfect, and if you can’t see that then you don’t fucking deserve him. You know what? Phil is done with you. So pack your shit and get the fuck out of his flat!” Dan yelled into the phone, angry with PJ for treating Phil like he did.
Phil stayed frozen, unable to move. “What is my life?” He whispers under his breath, looking up at Dan. His eyes filled with tears. PJ growled. "You must be joking!? That twat would be dead without me. He needs me. I know that and so does he!"
Dan didn’t know what was going on. He looked at Phil. “Do you need him so much that you are willing to endure the shit he puts you through?”
Phil wipes his eyes and notices something. A razor… in his hand… was this a sign? PJ didn’t want him. Dan pitied him… Should he end it?
Dan saw what was in Phil’s hand. “No, Phil. Don’t you dare. Don’t you fucking dare.” Dan reached over and took the blade from Phil’s hand. He shouted into the phone. “Pack up your shit and be gone by the time we get back. You have caused this boy so much pain. He deserves so much better. He’s done with you.”
Phil whines, reaching for the blade. “Please! PJ! HE WON’T LET ME CUT!” He shouted. He knew it was messed up but he didn’t know what was happening to him. He gives up, crying and starts to rip out all the wires.
Dan was horrified at the sight before him. He didn’t know what to do, he pressed the call button and tried to calm Phil down while he waited for the nurses to arrive. He had his arms around the poor boy. “Do you want to get better or not? I’m not letting you cut coz we’re in a fucking hospital Phil. If we were in my room then I would. I would hate myself for it but I would let you.”
Phil cried, falling into Dan’s arms. “I hate it here. I wanna go home. Take me home Danny…” Phil clung to Dan as if he was going to never see the boy ever again.
Dan tightened his grip on the poor boy. “I’ll take you home, I love you Phil, and I don’t want you to get hurt. But we have to stay here tonight. If you don’t vomit or damage yourself then the doctors will let you out in the morning. Don’t worry, I’ll stay here with you the whole time.”
Phil was shaking, his anorexic frame almost vibrating. “I-I love you too Dan.” He tried to hug Dan closer. “You’ll stay? You won’t leave me?”
Dan shook his head and held Phil close. “I’m not going to leave you. I would never leave you. Never in a million years.” Dan stroked Phil’s hair, trying to comfort the boy.
Phil moves over slightly. “Please. Lie with me…”
Dan gently gets into the bed with Phil and wraps his arms around the poor boy. “Forever Phil. I want this forever.” Dan placed a kiss to Phil’s forehead and watched the boy he admired.
Phil purred and curled into Dan, feeling calm. “This. This is what I’ve always wanted. Perfect.” He whispers, yawning.
“I’ve always wanted to love and be loved. To be able to sleep in my lovers arms. Now sleep Phil, you need it. I won’t leave you I promise.” Dan rested his head on Phil’s and closed his eyes.
Phil purred softly as he drifted off to sleep.
Dan woke up as sunlight streamed through the window. He watched Phil sleep. The boy’s face looked peaceful and Dan wanted to see this face forever.
Phil purrs softly in his sleep. He was like a cat. He felt a body next to him and smiled. “Mmmm Dan…” He then squeaks as his dream turned into a nightmare.
Dan shook Phil awake. “What’s wrong Phil? You sounded like you were scared…” Dan stroked Phil’s back encouraging him to tell his dream.
Phil sobbed. “You and me… we were lying in my bed… sleeping and when I woke,” Phil sobs harder. “Y-y-you were dead, blood everywhere and-and-and-”
“Ssh, it’s ok Phil. I’m still here. I’ll never leave you. I love you.” Dan pulled the boy to him and hugged him tightly.“B-b-but PJ…. And….”
“It’s ok Phil, he can’t hurt us. I won’t let him. When we get to England we can change the locks. He can’t bother us.” Dan wanted nothing more than for Phil to be happy.
Phil nods, his sobs slowly stopping. “You are to good to me Danny… Better then I deserve…”
Dan shook his head. “You deserve better than me. I’m amazed you settled for this.”
Phil sighed. “There is nothing better then you…”
“Lets get out of here, yeah?” Dan asked a nearby nurse for the release papers. Once she returned he signed them and started to get Phil dressed.
Phil felt so helpless as Dan dressed him. He blushed as Dan’s hands touched his huge body.
“Phil, there’s no need to be embarrassed. You have the perfect body. I wish I was as fit as you.” Once Phil was dressed Dan pressed a kiss to Phil’s lips and held his hand as they walked out of the hospital. “Where to now?”
Phil looked at his phone. “Well… if we hurry, we can still catch our flight…”
“What about my stuff? I’ll need clothes and you certainly need clean clothes.” Dan stopped and looked at Phil.
Phil smiled. “Theres enough time for us to get some of your stuff. The flight leaves in…” Phil looks at the time. “4 hours.”