FicWad

 
Quickly, I was geting ready for school. I grabbed everything and ran out the door. I kept running, and was looking for everybody. I finally found Jared at his locker, grabbing some textbooks. " Hey! Frankie looking better. " he smiled hugging me. " Looking better? Yeah! Hey do you remember what happened to me on Friday!? " I curiously asked him. " Well you left with some friends, and then next day i heard you were in the hospital, they wouldn't let us see you until you felt better. Then you were at a friends house. I guess until you got home? " he ended it in a questionable tone. " oh. " 
" i don't remember that much.. I need you to do something for me though! " 

Jared walked out to the back of the school where the group usually sat, he was looking for the boy who might have my stuff! I watched from the door, he walked down the hill and was talking to them. He came walking back and i walked up to him. " So? Does he have my stuff? " " Wel yeah, sorta but he wants to talkto you before you can get it! " " what!? Why! No! Just go get it! " " I can't! He said he has them at his house and will get them if you go with him to get them. "

Fuck me! Are you fucken kidding me! Ugh!
Jared patted my back and went inside. I looked over at the boy who just starred at me, smoking the cig in his mouth, while the others around him talked amongst themselves.

I motioned my head over to the street, i knew i had his attention. A real man what get this shit handled. I have to do to what i got to do. I walked over to the street, and he followed. I looked down at my shoes than looked at him, and quickly looked away. 
" Erm, let's get this over with. " he walked towards what i'm guessing is the direction to his house. The weather was cool and my hands were cold . I quietly walked a fast pace. He looked awkward and unsure. I looked at him with disgust but i admired his beauty. There was so much feelings and thoughts going on with me. It felt so right and so wrong to walk along side with someone i used to know.
" Gee, do you actually have my stuff!? "
" What!? "
" My stuff?? "
" No! You called me Gee! "
Oh my fucking jesus! I did! Why? What the fuck! Old habits die hard!? No where the fuck did that come from. 
" uhh, sorry. But hey! Do you or not!? " i said shakily but serious.
All i want was that! And i can keep him out of my mind and life forever! 

" Yes. "
" Kgood! " 
" I'm sorry of what happened and if I scared you or made you feel angry and feel weird about everything. It's just everyt.."
He stopped, and i looked back at him as he got his apology out in the open and i cut him off. " K! Don't fucking talk about anything! Nothing has happened! Just leave me alone! Just get me my stuff and get out of my face! " I snapped so harshly at him. His face just lit up in shock and anger and disappointment. I didn't care! I didn't want him in my life all of a sudden! He did worse to me however! Why should I feel sorry speaking this way to him!

He did save me.... He was there when nobody else was, when i could of died that night if he didn't show up. But still! He left me adbandoned and wounded! He ripped out my heart! He didn't want me! He didn't love me! Now he knows how it feels to not be wanted! Fucking liar! 

I was so filled with mixed emotions! And all I kept thinking of the innocent, hurt, wimped face that starred at me, with those big eyes. I started to cry and fell to my knees. I sobbed there for a few seconds hitting the ground. As he knelt down in front of me. I kept mumbling " you didn't want me! " over and over again. When i noticed he was rocking me back and forth. And he was humming a song. This moment i didn't care how angry i was at him. The feeling and lost but familiar feeling i felt while being close to his body just warmed me. 

;; you're the only friend that makes me cry.. 

I'm so sorry frankie... I jus.."

He kept on with his apology, explaining everything to me. I heard his talking, but i wasn't listening. I stopped crying as i moved back and sat up, i looked into his eyes. 

" Gerard, I fucking hate you! " I said and wiped my tears. My eyes felt puffy, and i was dizzy. But I was about to get up, and stood face to face, wasn't even fully standing when i grabbed his neck and pulled him towards me and our lips locked and we embraced. The warmness from his lips and body pressed against me; i missed this feeling. I missed him. Even when i didn't wanna admit it. I needed him.
He was there. But did he want me?