Iz experiences her first time being with Axl while he's going through a night terror/panic attack.
I was still shaken by the whole Gina thing. I'd kicked her out of the apartment and refused to help her with anything. I was trying not to think about what she said, about me being a girl version of Axl. Because I wasn't. Or am I? I'm overprotective of Axl, like he is with me. I hate his guts one second, then love him the next, like him with me. Apparently when I'm super angry my eyes go dark like Axl's do. I use a lot of threats. I dyed my hair red. Oh my goodness...is it possible I've been around Axl for so long and repressed feelings for him for so long that I've literally attempted to morph into him?! Or maybe this is who I really am and I just hadn't discovered it yet because I was so young. It was late at night now, Izzy and Axl still weren't back, and I'm scared to death of being alone when it's dark out. It was too quiet. I was thinking of calling Jani and Viv, when suddenly there was a knock on the door, I got up and went to the door, then stopped before I opened it. 'What if it's a serial killer?! Who would knock at this time?!' I thought to myself "Iz open up! I know you're in there!!" I heard someone call drunkenly, then I realized it was Steven. I opened the door and sure enough, there he was, drunk off his ass and probably high. "Iz, I love you! I want you back baby!! I need you! And you fuck me so good, I just wanna get some more of that..." he whined as he stepped into the door "Oh Steven, I'm so sorry, I know things ended awfully between us, and I'm so sorry. But it wasn't working out," I told him apologetically "One more kiss," he said, and then he kissed me in the lips "We can still be friends," I said "Yeah, sure. Well...I'm off!" he said as he wobbled out the door and into the hallway. I sighed and closed the door, then went to the couch. I laid down on it and soon I (unintentionally) fell asleep.
- 4 Hours Later -
I woke up, not on the couch, but on a bed. I could tell someone was next to me, so I rolled over and saw Axl lying with his back next to me. I smiled slightly and started to stroke his hair, just because it's so soft and pretty...man, it's better than mine! "I'm awake Iz," he said suddenly, I jumped a bit and giggled quietly "Sorry," I whispered, Axl turned around to face me and I noticed he looked like he had been crying and hadn't slept at all "It's okay beautiful," he whispered as he put the back of his fingers on my cheek and stroked it a bit. "Axl have you slept at all?" I asked worriedly, he started to get teary eyed "No," he said, voice breaking. "Oh god, Axl, are you okay? What happened?" I asked as I hugged him and cuddled into his arms "I have awful nightmares, memories, night terrors. I'm lucky if I get an hour of sleep after them," he sniffled, I could tell he was wiping his eyes "Oh man," I said as I hugged him tighter "It's so bad, Iz, when I sleep I remember these things that happened to me and I can't get it out of my head," he sobbed "It's okay Axl, you're awake now, you're safe, I'm here," I said soothingly as I squeezed him tighter. "And the nightmares....they're reflections of my life, just with different people or things! Sometimes I wake up in panic and crying and I didn't even have a dream!" he scream/sobbed as he hugged me tighter, digging his fingers into my back "I'm so sorry Axl, I'm sorry these things happen to you," I said, on the verge of tears myself. He continued to cry and hug me tighter, then he wrapped his legs around mine and attempted to get closer to me. The crying soon escalated into awful screaming and Axl squeezing me until I thought I might pop. I tried to calm him down, but he kept screaming this bloodcurdling scream that was combined with sobs. "Make it stop! Make it stop!" he screamed "I can't Axl! But you can! Just stop thinking about it! I'm here, and I'll always love you!" I screamed over his screams. Then he started coughing and shaking, I tried to let go of him to make sure he was okay, but he held me in place "Never let me go!" he screamed hoarsely, out of breath "Axl, you need to breath!" I yelled, worried he'd run out of breath "I only have you! No one else loves me!" he sobbed, "I'll always be here," I sobbed, crying myself. Then he couldn't produce anymore sound, he was just crying, he let go of me and kept crying "Axl, you need to stop crying! I don't want you to run out of air!" I cried as I climbed on top of him, he grabbed my head and kissed me on the lips "I'm the only one who loves you," he said "Just like me with you," I said, nodding in agreement. He slowly stopped crying, his breathing got steadier, and eventually he curled up into a ball on the bed and I got behind him, so he knew I was there for him, and that I'd never let him go.