Mikey saved Gerard once. Can Gerard do the same? Oneshot.
"How could you do this?" He yelled, gripping me tightly by the wrists and yanking me towards him. My face was inches from his and I could actually feel the intense heat and anger radiating from him. "Why would you do this to yourself?" I stared back at him, body trembling. I didn't know what to say. What was I supposed to say?
"Why would you do this to me? Did you even think?" He hissed. I kicked my legs weakly and attempted to scramble away from him, but his grip was strong, and I was simply too weak. I writhed and scrunched my eyes shut as he glowered at me with an infuriated gaze. "Why would you ever do this to yourself? Why are you so stupid Mikey?" He growled. I stared up at him in horror and realised he was right. The moment the words passed his lips I could see he was already regretting it. But he was right. He let go of me and gripped his own cheeks, pulling his hair in despair and regret.
"No. Oh, god, I didn't mean that, I really didn't - Mikey!" He began to cry, reaching out to me. I writhed and crawled away from him in fright. "Please."
"I'm so sorry.." I choked back, bowing my head in shame. Tears sprung from my eyes and spilt onto my freshly sliced legs and chest. His hands reached towards me and I considered wriggling away, but I was getting weaker by the second.
"I didn't.. Don't you know I.." Gerard's voice broke and he also bowed his head, his crown pressed against mine. He continued gripping onto my wrists and we knelt in silence, sharing a brotherly intimacy I had missed over the past few years, his grip slightly softening but still on me with urgency.
Gerard suddenly gasped and let go of me. I stumbled slightly but caught myself before I flopped, suddenly becoming aware of the blood dripping down me and the haziness of my sight. Gerard returned moments later, his arms filled with bandages.
"You're not going anywhere, not any more," He whispered harshly, grabbing my arms tightly and wrapping the bandages around me hurriedly. "Don't you dare do this to me, ever again!" He hissed. He slipped a hand behind my neck once he was completed with bandaging me, and he pulled me towards him and into his chest. It would have been painful, but I felt I was too drowsy to feel any more.
He rocked me back and forth, his fingernails still digging into me urgently. His nose and mouth were buried in my hair, his soft breath spreading over me.
Many minutes of shaky breathing passed before Gerard finally broke the silence.
"I'm not angry, Mikey." He finally whispered, sniffling. I could feel his tears falling onto my head, only just. "And you're not stupid, you're so far from that, Mikey, I.." He breathed in and out deeply, rubbing a hand across my cheek and cupping it.
"You don't understand what would happen if you had.. done that. I know you probably didn't even consider everyone else, because Mikey I've been there, you.." He pulled me closer and I buried my face into his chest. "You saved me." I swallowed and suddenly felt to guilty for what I was doing.
He was right. I had saved him. I can't fathom how angry I was at him that night. I was furious, but I was mostly feeling empty as I was shoved out of the way and he was taken by an ambulance. His was just a little worse than mine. Now I'm just so hollow. I had inflicted the same pain upon him.
"But why?" He asked. I turned around and lay back down against him, my head resting beneath his chin, his arms wrapped tightly around me.
"It seems like, whenever I so much as.. Leave the house, I get clobbered. No one cares about my feelings, not out there. They kick me to the curb without a thought. Not always literally, but.. It's happened. I'm made to look an outcast because I'm good at school. I'm made to look like an idiot because I'm not very good at talking to people. I'm made to look like a weakling because I can't stop the medicine balls and punching gloves from being hurled at me. At home, Mom tells me how I'll never amount to anything and Dad tells me how music is no place for a boy like me. I can't do anything right." I crumble, my head falling against Gerard's arm, which I took slight comfort in. "And now you're going to go off to University and be this amazing person and I knew that I'd probably be dead by the time you got back anyway - So I thought I'd.. speed up the process." I began to sob and he pulled my frail body in, pressing his lips firmly against my forehead. He held me securely and rocked, his tears spilling onto me and mingling with my own.
"Let me save you."
My fingers trembled as I reached for his hand. I found it and squeezed it hard, reassuring him.
I think I have an issue with angst, yep. I'll write something more fluffy soon I promise! :')
Rate/Review if you get the time. ^-^