Frerard. High school.
I hate him with every ounce of my small, 5’4 being. His face brings disgust to mine. I see him in the halls at school, flaunting his body at every single guy he sees. It’s no secret that he’s gay, he brags about how much dick he gets in every conversation. It’s okay for him to be homosexual though, he’s popular. Popular kids can do no wrong. However, if I were to come out the closet, which I’m not saying I will because, It would be generally frowned upon and I’d get beaten. Again. I hate him for his sweet talking mouth, his confidence, his hairstyle, his fashion sense and his personality all together, but.
There’s always a ‘but’, isn’t there?
I am most undoubtedly and unconditionally in love with him.
Of course, he doesn’t know that. He doesn’t need to know that. He barely knows I exist. He walks past me in the hallway and barely notices I’m breathing the same air as him, so why would he need to know I love him?
Let’s go back shall we?
About two years ago, that’s when these feelings started.
I was walking down the school hall, unsure of where my math class was. I was a new student you see and they office staff gave me no map or guide. I had to work it out myself, which I guess was best anyway considering I hate people.
Anyway, I was walking down the hall, looking at my timetable struggling to find my way, when all of a sudden my feet had come to a stop and I found my head colliding with an unnaturally tall jock. He shoved me off of him, started looking for a fight. Which I, being my scrawny little 15 year old self, was not prepared to give. I started frantically looking around to see my escape options. That’s when he came, like my knight in shining armour. He was walking fast heading straight towards me and my new.. acquaintance might we say. Anyway, the black clothed being had now thrown the jock off my small frame and into the nearest wall, he knelt down close to his ear and whispered what sounded like a warning, however, I struggled to hear as y’know.. he was whispering.
He came off the jock and deliberately disregarded his plead for a help up and started walking away. I chased him down the hall -which in my mind sounded a lot less stalker-ish than I realised- and tapped him on the shoulder. He spun round meeting my gaze, I panicked and didn’t know what to say. I stared at him, open mouthed. Taking in all of his beauty. He blinked twice, looking me right in the eye before turning back around and disappearing round the corner. Needless to say, thanks to him I did not get beaten up. However, I was still lost.