Shortfic, not much showing a real pairing, more of some interaction between Kakashi being an ass and a complete smart ass and Iruka not being afraid to use his his situation against him and do the ...
Righto, this is my first Short-ish fic. I wrote this while I was bored of studying at Tafe and had a sudden amusing idea come to my head and I had to write something about it. I hope you all found it as amusing as I thought the idea was. On another note, I guess I should leave a disclaimer.
I OWN NOTHING!
Kakashi and his two other Anbu team mates landed at their checkpoints with a few hours to spare. Kakashi took a piece of mirror from his pouch and reflected some light into one of the dark windows of the small hut as a signal of their arrival. A light was shined back in response and confirmation that it was safe to continue and they made their way to the door. As they entered the hut, they were met with a few familiar faces, not all of them being Anbu like himself and his team mates, but just regular Jounin.
"You're early?!" Came a startled voice he knew quite well. He lifted his hand in greeting to his smoking friend
"Yo, Asuma-kun" He said as he ignored his friends question.
Kakashi pulled off his Anbu gear, chucking it all into a backpack and letting one of his team mates take away all the gear into the next room.
"How come you can't be on time for anything, unless it's an important mission?" He finished off his cigarette and squashed it into an ashtray
"Some days I think there's something wrong with you.." Kakashi sighed. "It's just the way I am, I guess" And he shrugged it off as his nose was met with a delicious smell.
"Aw. You cooked for us? That's so sweet" The Anbu let the amusement in his voice show and Asuma snorted back.
"Yeah right, I wouldn't cook for you even if you were on your deathbed and it was your dying wish." Kakashi pouted, although it wasn't all that visible through his mask
"You always destroy my dreams, Asuma." His voice sounded disheartened.
"Someone has to keep deflating your ego Kakashi-kun" Asuma emphasized 'kun' to add a little more bite to his comment.
"How disrespectful." Kakashi noted to get Asuma back later as a door opened and a trolley was pushed through, containing the delicious smell. He was surprised to see someone he'd never noticed before and wondered who he was.
"I thought you guys would appreciate this after your journey" he said simply, putting the bowls of steaming soup out onto the table for everyone and disappeared into the kitchen again.
"I've never seen that Shinobi around before." He commented, wanting to be sure someone else knew him so he didn't have to feel so suspicious.
"Chuunin." Asuma left that hanging with an intention to say more, but instead lighting up another cigarette.
"Huh? What's a Chuunin doing here?" He was confused and couldn't think of any reasons.
"We were short of Jounin for this mission and so we had a Chuunin sent instead to help out. Don't worry, he won't be in the field, like me. We're here to set up, clean up and if we need he can treat wounds and do basic surgery. He will be useful if there's any trouble." Kakashi automatically responded to Asumas explanation.
"As a decoy?" Once a smart ass, always a smart ass.
"To save your ass when you fuck up" Said an irate voice and Kakashi swivelled around to find the Chuunin had returned with a basket of bread and was glaring at him quite intensely. He kind of felt guilty, but wasn't showing it.
The next few hours had passed quickly, Kakashi and his team mates conversed with friends and ate. The Chuunin had disappeared after bringing bread and Kakashi hoped that he hadn't really upset the Chuunin all that much. Sure enough he had appeared again later with a crate, placing it on the ground and left again, then returning with a pile of clothing and dumping it onto a clear space on the table. He interrupted their conversation, which would have been rude except it was important and needed to be said
"Its time for you all to get ready, you'll be leaving in the hour" Kakashi and his two other team mates all nodded in understanding and started grabbing clothing and changing.
"Ugh, I can't believe these people wear this shit" One of his team mates commented, pulling on a pair of baggy pants. Kakashi noticed there were two extra sets of clothing left in the pile
"Who is joining us, Asuma-san?" He asked his Jounin friend. "A fellow Jounin and another Anbu. You know them both quiet well." Asuma replied as a Jounin burst through the doors. Kakashi groaned.
"Yes! Kakashi-rival, I shall be accompanying you on this adventure!" Asuma sighed
"Gai... You should have signalled before bursting in like that, I was about to jump up and kill you" He said going to sit back down.
"You mean you were going to try, Asuma-san!" Gai said confidently and Asuma resigned before the verbal fight even started
"Just get ready, you have to leave soon." Kakashi wondered why Gai had to come along, there were plenty of people who he would rather have here instead of Gai. At least it wasn't a long term mission and just a few-day mission. He could deal, he guessed.
Iruka had taken the remaining set of clothing, stealthily and into the next room where shortly later out came a yawning Yamato, dressed in gangster drag and ready to head out.
"Hey guys." He said lazily and wandered over to them. Kakashi smiled to have someone that could block out Gai's annoying ways. He shook Yamato's hand
"Good to see you again." And Yamato returned the greeting, remembering his long time friend.
"And you too. Its nice to see you haven't changed." He made his observation.
"What do you mean?" He was genuinely confused and Yamato smirked at this
"I mean, Iruka, who you've already managed to piss off with you're irresistible charm" Kakashi laughed weakly with a hint of guilt.
"My bad' Kakashi said and Yamato laughed, walking to the crate that Iruka had bought in earlier.
"This, team-leader" He addressed Kakashi
"Is a box of the weapons to be used in this mission. Everyone gets one." He pulled out one of the shiny weapons.
"As you know, this particular town and the few around it are run by gangs, with technology being their only weapons. The better your technology, the more control you have over your territory and the easier it is to defend and take over other territory. Our objective is to destroy the Akume gang under the ruse of a new gang looking to overthrow him. These weapons are called Lightning Guns and were the best that the village could get for us for this mission." Asuma handed out the weapons
"Oh" he added "One more thing. I cannot stress how important this is , DO NOT point your Lightning Gun at another team mate ever. Overall this mission should be a piece of cake. Let's get this over and done with."
The team nodded and left, after saying their goodbyes to Asuma and Iruka who would now spend this time packing everything away and loading it up into crates for when the transport arrived.
Iruka huffed as the team left
"Tch, what a prick" He commented to Asuma.
"Tell me something I don't know." He said back and sat down at the table. Iruka was now on a rant. "Where does that guy get off, taking about me like that (coffee?)"
"(Thanks) it's just the way he is, it comes naturally for him to respond like that. Infact, i'm not even sure he meant it with the way he acted when Yamato mentioned it."
Iruka bought in two cups of coffee and set them down. It was going to be awhile before they would return and Iruka intended to enjoy it.
Yamato wasn't kidding when they said it was going to be an easy mission. The gang battle was simple when there was only one member of the opposing force that had any abilities at all of that of a shinobi and they were only a Chuunin at best. Against five Jounin they had won easily. The oppressive gang was eliminated and now that town could get back to a normal life. Kakashi was picking up the weapons like everyone else to be taken back to the village and destroyed.
"That wasn't worth five Jounin!" Gai exclaimed loudly for what had to be the fifth time already.
"I told you," Kakashi said, irritated "the vil-" he was cut short from a loud bang and a pain shooting up his back, originating from his lower back. He fell forwards as his right leg could no longer support him. Yamato shot forwards, killing the gang member who had been hiding around the corner, who was barely alive himself as Gai jumped to Kakashi's aid. Kakashi grunted as he was lifted up and helped to stand.
"You alright?" Asked Yamato as he approached from behind.
"My ass hurts." Kakashi said simply while cringing from the pain
"Whoa, babe, we're not that far in our relationship yet" He was amused by Kakashis predicament and so were the others by the way they were all snickering at Yamatos response. Kakashi glared, not that amused, at all.
"Come on. Lets get you back" Gai said and everyone agreed following them with a hobbling Kakashi back.
It had taken quite awhile to get back to the small hut with an incapacitated Kakashi. Gai had practically dragged Kakashi most of the way there while Yamato and the other Jounins cracked a few jokes, lightening Kakashis mood. As soon as they had entered the doors, the two occupants had stopped all actions, focusing on Kakashis arm draped around Gai's shoulder.
"Oh, I didn't know you two had become lovers" Asuma smiled and Kakashis mood died a little. "Heh, yeah right, who would take this dolt?" Asuma had moved over to help Gai with Kakashi, putting his other arm over his shoulders and dragged him over to the table where he quickly cleared it of items
"What happened?" Gai let go of Kakashi to tell him about it
"Kakashi-kun was careless!" He exclaimed "The enemy was swift and stealthy in his attack and the result was Kakashi was shot in the ass!"
The abruptness and the way Gai had just gone straight to the point with his sentence had stunned the entire room. Asuma struggled to keep and straight face, turning from a serious face because of the injured situation to amused as all hell. He then turned Kakashi so that when he did lie down it wasn't going to be painful.
"I'll go get the surgical equipment" Iruka said, still laughing. Yamato went with Iruka and returned with a few towels, sheets and pillows. He draped the sheet over the table and waited for Kakashi to be lying down before placing a pillow under his stomach and giving him another to prop himself upwards.
"Why do we need surgical equipment? Its nothing so why don't you just bandage and clean it?" Kakashi asked with a little concern. Yamato was happy to answer
"It's a bullet wound. The bullet needs to be removed and the wound stitched up." Kakashi kept looking concerned while Iruka entered with a trolley of medical equipment.
"Don't worry!" Yamato put an arm around Iruka's shoulders "Nurse Iruka will look after you!" Iruka gave Yamato a strange look accompanied with a grunt of annoyance as he put together a syringe and filled it with some fluid.
"That's what I was worried about." Kakashi said. Iruka flicked at the syringe to get all the air bubbles out.
"This can be quick and easy or it can be hell, Kakashi-san." Iruka still wasn't happy with Kakashi and he didn't really have to use pain killers. He didn't even have to be gentle with the syringe. Yamato inwardly cringed at Iruka's words and thanked his stars he wasn't the one that had pissed off Iruka and then had to have him as his doctor.
"Oooohh, time to be nice now Kakashi, unless you want a needle in your ass..." Yamato taunted and Iruka paused
"That's the whole point of the syringe" He stated
"Oh" Yamato looked for a moment like he was thinking
"Well, good luck!" He moved to the next room before he could say anything else stupid.
"I need to be able to assess the wound" Iruka told Gai and Asuma, hoping one of them would catch onto what he was trying to say. As expected Asuma nodded and pulled a kunai from his holster.
"I hope you bought some spare pants, Kakashi" He said while tearing at his pant cloth with his kunai. There was blood smeared all down his right side from the wound. Iruka sighed
"I told you I'd be saving your ass when you fucked up" He wasn't intending conversation but Kakashi spoke up anyway
"I'm sorry." He said quickly and then left it, so Iruka could get his 'I told you so' speech out of his system. Iruka rubbed his temples while he cleaned up the blood around the wound with disinfectant.
"I forgive you. I understand it's the way you are" Gai and Asuma situated themselves near by, in case they were needed and there was an uncomfortable silence.
"So" Kakashi started, obviously content with the neutral ground they were on now and Iruka picked up his syringe.
"Come around here much, babe?" Gai and Asuma snorted and snickered abruptly as Kakashi said that. Iruka noted that Kakashi had a wonderful sense of humour and he promptly stabbed Kakashi in the ass with the syringe. Kakashi yelped in pain.
"Fucking smart ass." Iruka growled and started the procedure.
Womg, the first story I have ever finished, I'm so proud I finished it. I just hope it doesn't suck ;_;
Thanks for reading anyway ~