a drink for the horror that I'm in.
"See, he's late. Let's just take the damn train" I sighed and tried to think of a way too fool Mikey into going with me. I had thought of blackmail and bribery and let's just say that I don't think I left a single questionable (illegal) way unthought of but none of them seemed to have an affect on Mikey.
I don't think he was as afraid of me anymore as he used to be.
"Mikey, respect my authority or I will beat your ass with this stupid flower thing" Mikey had bought his Mama a glass rose on a black satin box with a bunch of wires and lightbulbs underneath that made the rose sway and light up in various colours.
Despite the millenia, you could still see the 90's everywhere with all the disco shit with the lavalamps, the new generation walkmans, the one thousand and three things that attempted to look cool and outta-this-world but really had no use at all. It was starting to get to the best of us, I decided as I stared at the gadget.
I can't believe Mikey paid five bucks for this.
He yanked the thing out of my hands and tucked it safely into his messenger bag. I could see his nerves building up.
"He'll be here soon. We came out early" He said as he glanced at his watch and tapped his foot in a nervous manner. I rolled my eyes.
"Right. In case we're early then I'll just go up and have another cup of coffee before we depart" I bowed and made an attempt to get back inside but Mikey's hand soon had a firm grip on the hem of my jacket.
I lit a cigarette and pouted.
I know I was being stupid, but that Gerard guy made my skin crawl in a very bad way, from the short time I've known him he would already be my perfect definiton of the word jackass. Disrespectful, rude, a tattle tale, a real freaking pain in my sensitive ass.
I had told Mikey this and all he said was that I should take a long hard look in the mirror. I'd snorted and muttered something about me atleast not being a tattle tale. Mikey had ended the conversation by shaking his head and leaving the room.
Their stupid brotherly bond was starting to affect our friendship.
Speaking of the devil, I thought as the battered old van pulled up by the curb. Gerard jumped out of the vehicle that to me seemed more like a weapon of mass destruction. He pulled Mikey into a tight hug and eyed me all the while.
"Gee we better get going right now. Ma's expecting us at four and I wouldn't bet on the traffic being any more humane than usual"
"Yeah, sure. Get in"
So no greetings for me, huh? I walked to the side of the van with as much cockiness as I was capable of and climbed inside.
"It even smells like death in here" I stated after I got settled and had the seatbelt around my body as tightly as it would go.
"It didn't until you got inside" Gerard snorted.
"Oh, i'm not Death. What makes you think you'd still be alive if I was?"
"Cause you're a pussy" he shrugged as he revved the engine and started towards the highway.
"No, Gerard. Have, not am. Learn your freaking grammar."
"Are you sure you have one? I mean cause you're a total dick"
"You sure you have a dick then? I mean cause you're a total cunt"
"Hey PLEASE!!" Mikey shrieked "we're gonna go see Ma so get your fucking act together, both of ya!"
I slouched in my seat, glaring Gerard through the center mirror every chance I got.
By the time Gerard pulled the deathvan up on Mrs.Way's driveway that was as much conversation we had managed.
I wasn't even sure why I suddenly felt such powerful hatred towards the guy, he had seemed nice enough at the campus when Nick had first asked Gerard to help me out. I thought sourly about Nick and came to conclusion that it was actually all his fault - Gerard had got his panties in a knot when he had seen me sit on Frank's lap and had decided to show me the very dipshit in him by threatening to make a big deal out of it by telling Nick. I hadn't realized they were such BFuckingF's with Nick and apparently Gerard didn't like the way I presumable treated the guy.
What a bunch of bullshit.
I get why I was angry at him, I was sort of an easily offended type when it came to having a big mouth or poking his nose into my business or making evrything out of nothing and threatening he'd go tell and that it would sound like I actually had done something bad when in fact I fucking hadn't.
I was out of breath and frustatred as hell after listing all that so I decided to stop and go with the fact that I was entitled to hate him but he had no reason to treat me like a piece of shit. I'd never offended him. Well not until today, I added in spite of myself as I thought over the previous conversation.
Gerard was the first one to be greeted by Mrs.Way, they stayed in the intimate embrace for what felt like ten awkward years for me, while Mikey stood smiling and perfectly at ease. Even though I loved Donna to no end, I always felt a little out of place here. I wasn't family, after all.
She muttered some words in Italian which I think none of us understood. I didn't know Gerard that well but when it came to Mikey boy, he liked to show off his Italian roots but couldn't speak or comprehend the language any more than he would have if it was Japanese.
"And you two" She smiled "Still attached at the hip?" I smiled even though I very much wanted to point out the fact that she made it sound like we'd always have been best friends and never went anywhere without each other, when in fact I'd only moved to Mikey's after my mother made it clear she didn't want me in the house and that most days I didn't even see Mikey. He was out when I was in, and vice versa.
Despite all that, I bit my tongue and smiled.
"So when's the wedding again?" She laughed a melodic, loud laugh and I cringed at the crappy joke.
"Ma..." Mikey started
"Yeah, yeah, I was just kidding. Stop being so grumpy you two. Atleast Gerard is in a good mood." She pulled us into a quick group hug and we followed her into the kitchen.
"It's just gonna be lasagna" She announced "I was going for something a bit more special but that great idea is currently located out front in the trashcan"
"Lasagna sounds wonderful" I nodded as she took the steaming food out of the oven.
"And smells wonderful, too" Mikey agreed.
"Suck-suck-suck" I heard Gerard mutter undedr his breath and both Mikes and I replied with a glare. Atleast Gerard is in a good mood, pfft!
I did my best to ignore the older Way brother as we ate for I didn't want to hurt Donna's feelings by appearing annoyed.
She asked me questions about school, and I answered even though I didn't really want to get into it. Especially with Gerard around. Now that he wasn't being so helpful anymore, I had gone lost for like 45320 times and been late for most of my classes. By lunch, I'd given up and walked home. My glorious first day.
I told sheepishly this to Donna, and from the corner of my eye saw Gerard smirk throughout the story. I gritted my teeth, got a hold of my temper and went on - I spoke to Donna only.
She was encouraging as usual, stating that that was propably how the first day of college was for most of the students. She also made Gerard squirm by asking why he hadn't offered to help me and show me around. I loved seeing that smirk beinh wiped off of his face.
After thirty minutes of sitting in the livingroom feeling a little out of place, Donna suddenly stood up with a gasp.
"Oh my!" She hurried to the kitchen and back "Oh my, totally forgot about Grandma!"
Both Mikey's and Gerard's heads snapped away from the television.
"Oh no no, nothing serious, you boys can relax. But Michael, you have to get going - I promised Grandma you'd go and see her, you know, in the elderly center. Gerard went to see her last week and I've been there nearly every day but it's you she's hoping for. I told her you'd be coming home today and she's waiting for your visit"
Mikey made a face and just as he was about to start the whining, Donna went on
"Michael James Way, I don't want to hear a single negative word from you. It's your grandmother we're talking about and she misses you. I'll drive, but we have to get going, it's getting kind of late."
She turned her focus on Gerard who seemed to be concentrating on some documentary on Iron Maiden's early years and me, who was unable to unplaster the horrified expression off my features-
"Are you kids okay? There's soda in the fridge if you're thristy. Gerard - be a good boy and get her some if she wants. Why don't you have a movie night? Michael and I will be back in a hour or two"
-My face flushed pink as her words sunk in. Alone with Gerard. For an hour. Or TWO. Just shoot me already...
"I should go see my Mom" I announced after deciding that no matter how much I loved to put off visiting that woman, it was ten times better than the current option.
"Oh, sweetie, I don't think your mother is home right now. They've been on a vacation for over a week with that eh, friend, of hers. Mrs. Bellar from down the road has been watering her plants. I don't think they'll be coming back until later this week. She didn't tell you?"
Defeated, I sank back to the sofa.
"No, she didn't tell me."
The last thing I saw was Mikey's pained face and I wanted to kick him for acting like a goddamn martyr about visiting his grandmother when in fact I was the one and only victim in this story.
When the front door was slammed shut, the silence that followed was piercing. I was trying to think of something smart and witty to start a fight with since quarrelling was the only thing I knew that could help me avoid two hours of awkward silence.
I was just about to ask him if he wanted to watch the Titanic or something equally fluffy that he most likely usually watched, when he rose up to open the door to the patio.
"Let's go smoke" He said tonelessly and I followed. The deck was wet but I found a pair of slippers just outside the door. Two round-eyed kittens looked up from the fabric and I decided they had to be Mikey's. No one else loved cats quite like Mikey did.
Gerard surprised me by actually offering me a cigarette, which I accepted - defiantly and without a thank you.
"Well this is interesting" He mused has he blew out a long gush of smoke.
"Kinda" I amended.
"Not much of a bigmouth now, are you?" He chuckled.
"I've been raised better than to insult a man in his own house" I claimed, though I'd never been taught such thing. He laughed at me again.
"I sure hope you've been raised well enough to take care of your guest" I scoffed.
"You want me to take care of you?" He asked, his voice raspy and oddly dangerous. He leaned in and I insinctively leaned back in response, I didn't like his face quite that close to mine. He took a deep drag and blew the smoke on my face and even though I'm a full-time smoker, he caught me off guard and made me cough and my eyes itch.
He stood still, cocking his head from one side to the other.
"Yeah, so go get me a soda" I managed to blurt out. My voice trembled, which I hated, I would rather die than have him notice that he was actually scaring me for a second there. He pulled away, quitely laughing to himself.
Why did I have to become enemies with a fucking maniac? Cause that's what he seemed like all of a sudden. There was a dark, ominous edge to his presense. I shuddered behind his back, after he started walking back inside. I smoked my cigarette in despair, hoping it would last forever so I would have an excuse to stay on the deck and never set foot in that house again. Not as long as Gerard was the only one in it.
Eventually, the cigarette died out and I forced myself back inside.
I locked the patio door behind me. Gerard was nowhere to be seen. There was a can of soda carelessly placed on the sofa table, but the TV was shut off and slowly it came to my understanding that so were most of the lights, too. Or had it been so dark in here before we went out? I didn't think so.
Gerard gave me the creeps and for the life of me I don't know why I grabbed the soda can and went to find him. I could've just sat on the couch, switched the TV on and get down with the Mtv Cribs or something. But no, I had go loooking for the dipshit because quite frankly, the thought of being alone in their big house got me a little jumpy, which I hated to admit even to myself.
I hadn't been to Gerard's room since elementary school. You know, the dares I told you about before. I was still a little traumatized by those, and the closer I got to the damned door the more I started to feel like watching TV alone had in fact been a conciderable option.
I touched the door, and crooked as it was, it didn't need more force than that to slowly open with a loud creak.
"Gerard?" I called tentativelly "Are you in here?"
I stepped on the first wooden step and almost got a heatattack as his irritated, husky and somehow nasal voice came with a reply.
"Yeah, but no sluts in here, please"
I was too preoccupied trying to restart my heart to fully register the insult. I frowned a little, but motsly at myself for being so easily scared. I still had some goosebumps on me after Gerard's gloomy dark behavior on the deck.
I went down a few steps and almost tripped on something that felt like a rubber band around my ankles. As I lifted it up I felt a strong urge to wash my hands, use Derm-X, and then wash em again.
"Oh, but I think there's already been one down here" I yelped and walked down the last remaining steps and held the item tightly between my thumb and forefinger, crinkling my nose as I raised it up high for Gerard to see.
He was up in a insant, launching at me from across the room.
"Gimme those!" He hissed and grabbed the pink lace thong that had been laying around, almost causing me to fall over in the stairs and die. I had a silent moment as I realized that a pair of slutty panties could've been the death of me. Huh, wouldn't that be a cause of death worth writing on my tombstone.
August 4th 1979 - November 25th 2000
Beloved, though ignored daughter
Respected, but unpopular friend
Deceased due to misplaced lacy underwear of an unidentified skank.
I kinda liked the sound of that.
"I didn't know you still spent time in here. I mean, I understand you do have your own place in the city? Or have those been here since your teen years? If so, they must be either yours, which I try not think about, or they must be stolen from someone" I laughed
"Shut up. They're Kat's - wait, why am I telling you this?" He spat while tucking the very tiny piece of clothing in the closest drawer.
"To protect your reputation - not that you particularly have one" I shrugged.
He went back to whatever he was working on at the desk.
"So who's Kat?" I asked. He turned to give a look with his eyebrow raised high, then turned right back again.
"Just making conversation" I huffed. "No need to be a jackass. Remember, I'm your fucking guest."
He turned again, the office chair making squeaky noises as he did.
"Really, Em? You hate my guts, I hate yours, so why don't I stay here and you get the hell out. Why are you visiting my Ma anyways? Who invited you?"
"Mikey did" I whispered, trying to keep up my defiance.
"Then go back up to drink that soda of yours, or was it something stronger you needed? I have vodka in the cabinet right there, word is on the street that offering you vodka is the best way for a man to get you to fucking comply" he mocked with ice in his voice.
I know he was just mocking me, but a girl can't help her nature.
"I'll take the vodka, please" I said loudly and stomped to the cabinet he'd pointed out, grabbed the glass and loudly made my way back upstairs.
"You have got to be kidding me" I heard him call from behind me, but I didn't stop to think about what he said, or even what Mikey would say to me once he'd find me at his mother's house completely wasted. If Mikey thought he could out-rant me after leaving me here with that shithead of a brother of his, he had another thing coming.
I marched forward, out onto the deck, pulled up a lawnchair and cracked open the cheap bottle.
I was a guest, and I'd been offered a drink.