Life begins at the end of your comfort zone..
After an undefined amount of time, my self-pity marathon was interrupted by sounds of sheer amusement coming from the room next to mine. Frank's girly giggles and Gerard's maniac loud laughter echoed in the air, penetrating my bedroom door and the 12 layers of blankets I was currently located under, curled up in fetal position.
The shrieks and exclamations of joy were seriously starting to annoy the fuck out of me, I mean I was here doing the right thing after being a dickface and there they were, totally oblivious, having the time of their lives by the sound of it.
They could atleast show some motherfucking respect to my shame.
Gerard's laughter evolved into such hysterics I was getting kind of worried Frank was sexually assaulting him or something, and since my night of self-hatred had already been cancelled I decided to go out and kick some big baby butt. I let out a frustrated growl as I slowly unlocked the door and peeked into the living room.
Frank was laying on the floor on his back, giggling like no one's business all the while trying to hold his head up high enough to see the TV screen. Oh, so Mortal Combat it is. Couldn't they let a girl dispise herself in peace? All this ridiculous fun-having was side-tracking my thoughts, and re-directing my anger into these guys had now been made tremendously easy. Too easy.
Gerard sat on the couch, looking like a ragdoll someone threw into the corner and never cared enough to pick it up again, having a laughing fit. The whole thing- the reddish face, the tears, the disoriented eyes, shaking body, and still he managed to somehow kick Frank's player's ass big time.
If he didn't give two shits about how I'd behaved, then why the hell should I?
I marched into the kitchen, grabbed a coke from the fridge and stomped back into the living room. It was as if I'd had some stupid green genie in a goddamned empty rum bottle to have me turned invisible, I got absolutely no reaction from neither of the men. Zero. Nada.
I faked a cough that sounded exactly like what it was, a stupid fake cough. Frank's eyes wandered to me for no longer than a fraction of a second before they were back on the TV screen. How he was even able to concentrate in a position like that, was beyond me. I tapped my fingernails on the soda can and sat on the floor not two feet from Frank.
"Hello?" I called, irritated.
I held the unopened can above Frank's stomach, making gestures that inplied I was going to drop it any second. Failing at getting his attention, I grabbed the hem of his shirt, and pressed the ice cold can against his exposed, bare skin.
A shrill squeak escaped his lips and as he looked down to what I was up to, I noticed Gerard deliver the last kick to send Frank's player down some high as fuck bridge and into the river below.
"What the hell was that?" Frank yelped
"It's a can of ass-kicking, don't make me open it" I smirked, extremely happy with myself.
"I lost because of you!" He barked at me in disbelief.
Boys and games. Go figure.
"It's no big deal, Frank. I can Mortal Combat the shit out of you any time in real life" I chuckled.
Gerard was sitting there looking like an idiot with a permanent victory grin on his face, not caring the least bit about what we were talking about.
Frank glared, trying to make me understand through some telepathic messaging just how much he doubted me.I felt like changing the subject was a good idea.
"So you two seem to get along.." I mused, mainly to Frank.
Gerard was the one who hurried to answer, though.
"Yeah it turned out you're the only bitch in the building after all. Must get lonely."
"Well ya'know, it's hard to be a diamond in a rhinestone world" I made a face at him and came to the conclusion that changing the subject wasn't the best idea ever. I opened my mouth to go back to teasing Frank about the Mortal Combat thing, but didn't have time to spit one word out of my mouth when I heard the smartass talking again.
"Bitter bitch" He laughed "You're such a bitter little bitch"
"Frank, he's insulting me" I poked Frank on the ribs.
"I can hear that"
"No no, I'm not insulting her, I'm describing her..." Gerard smirked
"Frankie, do something..."
"It's not my job to blow sunshine up his ass, Em. In fact, it's not my goddamned job to blow sunshine up anyone's ass. Not even yours, Em"
I was a little taken back by Frank's words. I hadn't really meant him to do something about Gerard, I was just whining like I pretty much always did. Did he really consider me as someone who expected him to help me out and cheer me up all the time? Was I someone like that? I couldn't help but frown as I replayed the words in my head. I guess what he did for me could be called as blowing sunshine up my ass, nevermind the mental picture, but I thought it was a friend thing...an obligation that went both ways.. or something..
Frank must've noticed my horrified expression or my trembling lips, cause soon my worries were interrupted by his body slamming into mine. I was out of breath again, for fucking real, if I ever find out who taught Frankie to consider assaulting someone like this as a big, fluffy hug, I wouldn't think twice about smashing the person's brains out.
"I was joking" He laughed "Where's your wit, Em?"
"Propably very lost and misplaced somewhere inside my body, you know, just like every single one of my organs.. You hug like a show wrestler, Frank"
"And you promised to show me some mortal combat" He laughed
"I think she meant sex, Frank" Gerard's grim voice came from behind us "Sex with someone like her would be one hell of a mortal combat, surviving a trauma like that is against all odds"
"Aaa - haaa- haa" I cried, Gerard was fast getting closer to my limits, once again. "Well it ain't my faut if someone can't take a real ride, and would rather fuck girls who just lay there like a dead person, unable to move because of the fear of getting her hair messed up. How does it feel to fuck a corpse, huh, Gerard? Do you feel like a man when she bites her lip, but not of enjoyment but because she waits for it to end, trying not to touch your body any more than necessary, hoping it will be over soon?"
Frank sat stiff on my side, I felt his body tense up. He knew I was starting to cross some serious boundaries again. He got up to avoid the confrontation. A moment later I heard some noises coming from the kitchen.
Gerard's face was expressionless, unreadable.
"Don't talk about Kat like that" He finally whispered sternly.
"I wasn't talking about Kat particularly, I was talking about every... single... girrll.. youu have. everrrrr. fucked" I sang but as the last syllabel was out of my mouth, I felt a firm grip on my throat as I fell back.
It took me a shamefully long time to realize that Gerard had launched, grabbed my throat and had me now pinned against the floor. With his free hand, he touched my face in a way which, oh fucking hell, turned me on like never before. His fingertips went through my hair, pulling and tugging on strands on the way, then came down to my cheek which he squeezed slightly, sending me a clear message that I was to keep my mouth firmly shut. His body was pinned against mine, and somewhere along the way he had managed to press his knee down to the floor, right between my legs, and was now pressing his hips against mine. His ragged breathing felt hot and wet on my skin and aching chills went up and down my spine. On a loose thought I wondered why Frank hadn't done anything yet, shouldn't he be rescuing me and tossing Gerard around, wrestling on the floor like no tomorrow?
I felt his finger on my lips now, as he tightened his grip on my throat. I wasn't exactly choking, but breathing definitely became more of a task, my breath wheezing as I exhaled.
Strangely, I wasn't the least bit intimitated. I was just turned on to the point of losing my mind and anxious and desperate with anticipation. His fingers traced my lips, parting them just enough to move his finger so that it looked like I was kissing it, which I after a second did. I met his gaze, making sure he knew what I imagined I had in my mouth as I twirled my tongue, circling the very tip of his calloused finger.
I felt something hard against my thigh.
I hesitated, for only a second, but it caught his attention.
"You feel that?" He whispered seductively. I didn't temporarily trust my voice, so I nodded, unsure of what he was getting to.
He pushed himself closer, so close that I had no choice but to breath in an out the same time he did in order to get any air at all. His body weight wasn't much, but his strenght caught me off guard.
I tilted my head a little, to get a piece of his skin between my teeth, and when I did, he tightened his grip again. I felt a strong urge to cough. The blood was starting to gather into my head, making my pulse very audible in my ears and I felt feverish pressure behind my eyes, as if they were to pop out any second now.
My hand flew to the back of his head, clenched around his hair and pulled. I glared at him defiantly, but with such sparks and twinkle in my eyes that left little to his imagination.
"You need some professional help with your temper, G" I tried to laugh, not exactly without effort, my voice cracking and hoarse.
"I don't need any anger management classes, you just need some serious shut the fuck up classes" He spat gritting his teeth, pressed me down with that much more force and then, finally, let me go and got up. He walked to the other end of the room, panting and shaking his head.
I was a little worried now, worried that I would start to bruise around my neck. I backed away and leaned on the wall, trying to catch my breath and compose myself, just in time to see Frank entering the room.
"You guys cool?" he asked, oblivious to what had just happened.
"We're cool" I nodded.
Something had changed. Gerard went from a spineless whimp to someone I very much wanted to have inside me right now, and all this had changed in just a few crazy seconds. I stared at him, glared more likely, but there was a certain factor of awe hidden in my eyes.
How on earth did I not see that before? His hair was out of place, wild and overgrown, dark as ebony. His eyes were fierce with anger and determination. His jaw was set, as if he was clenching his teeth, and I found even that somehow very sensual.. His lips were pursed and his posture screamed menace. I sat there, hand on my throat, and realized for the first time what kind of a man I was looking at.
Frank tossed a new can of soda at me, which I caught by some miracle. I couldn't get my eyes off Gerard. He wasn't paying attention to me at all, though, he was studying Frank as intently as I was him. He was propably scared Frank had seen or heard something and was an inch away from kicking the guy's ass.
"Anyone up for another round?" Frank asked, a little uncomfortable in the still tense atmosphere.
"Sure" Gerard muttered, composed himself and grabbed the joystick.
Me too, I declared in my mind.
Definitely up for another round...
After a while, I crawled into my bedroom to recover from whatever had just happened.
I think I made up a thousand ways to lure Frank out of the apartment and get Gerard in my bed, but acted on none. I had to get my head straight.
I really fucking had to.
sorry, i know it's terribly short but i felt like cutting it off here. the next chapter will make up for this one, lenght-wise!