Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Beautifully Disfigured
Chapter 15
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"Hey Frankie, it's a boring day today."
It had been 2 weeks and Gerard hadn't left Frank's side, except to go to the bathroom, but there was a bathroom at the bottom of Frank's room, so Gerard didn't have to leave. Despite admitting that they both were better off without each other, Gerard wanted to wait until Frank was awake before he left. Gerard wanted to know that Frank was okay before he left his side, he wasn't just going to leave Frank here on his own. Gerard still felt a little guilty about all the event that had happened. Gerard didn't sleep though, how could he sleep with all these people around him? They could come in at any time and stare at him or touch him. He couldn't trust these people. And he never would.
"I really want you to wake up now, I don't like it here on my own," Gerard said from his chair beside Frank's bed, "You've forced me to do this, and I didn't want to."
Gerard had often done this, just let out his feelings to Frank while he was in his deep sleep, "You made me see them, and I didn't want to. You've made me come here, and I never wanted to. Don't you see that you're not helping me?"
Gerard's voice was squeaking in anger and he felt guilty then, because Frank had helped him so much. "I've ruined your friendship with Mikey, probably lost you your job and you still try and help me."
"You've helped me in some ways," Gerard breathed out a breathy laugh, "You've made me feel more beautiful than I ever have before. But this just proves that you're not good for me. You'll just be passing me on your life journey and then you'll leave me behind. Finding a girl and then getting married."
Gerard needed to say this to Frank, he felt like he had bottled it up since he found out that Frank was accepting of having Gerard's parents come to his house.
"I hate you, Frank," Gerard sighed and let go of Frank's hand, to glare at the floor, "I hate you so much because you're destroying yourself by being my friend. You could have left. I gave you the chance!"
Gerard was in his own world too much to notice that Frank's eyes were open and he was struggling to breathe with the machine still down his throat that was feeding him. His body started to arch as he tried to breath and nurses rushed in to help Frank. Gerard just stared in shock from the seat he was sat in.
The nurses pulled the tube from Frank's throat and he coughed and gagged and Gerard felt a little nauseous. Then the nurses spent the next 30 minutes asking Frank questions to check his memory and if he was okay. These questions usually consisted of trivial questions, like his name, the president's name, where he was born, his mothers name and if he had any pets.
"I remember everything okay?" Frank sighed, "Can I please talk to Gerard alone now?"
The nurse nodded and left, leaving Gerard and Frank on their own.
"Your voice is deep and scratchy. It sounds like you've been smoking for 10 years straight," Gerard pointed out, not really wanting to repeat what he had said to Frank. He knew that Frank could remember, he had practically just admitted it.
"Do you really hate me, Gee?" Frank asked, his head facing Gerard's while his body remained straight, "B-because I couldn't be more in love with you. And I'm not afraid to say it anymore, we've been through too much to be afraid of feelings now."
"But if you," Gerard coughed awkwardly, "If you loved me, why would you let them near me? I told you they hated me, I told you they would hate me and I told you that they'd always hate me."
Frank turned his head a little so that he was staring at the white washed ceiling, and thought for a while. He didn't really know how to respond correctly. He could tell the truth, but he could also lie. In this situation, he thought it would probably be best to just tell the truth.
"I wanted to make them jealous, or proud, I don't know." Frank ran a shaky hand through his greasy hair and grimaced, "I wanted them to see that I love you, and that you were amazing and that you had made something of yourself."
"They know that already Frank," Gerard pointed out fairly, "They're always going to know that and hate me for it."
"Gerard come on, please. Just, give me one more chance okay. I'll never let anyone get that close to hurting you again," Frank begged.
Gerard shook his head, "No, Frank. Because yeah, that punch would have hurt me. It would have hurt a lot. But you getting hurt, and being in a coma, hurt me more than that could have."
This time, Frank shook his head. "I'm going to prove to you how much you mean to me. I promise."
A/N: I had a lazy (sort of) week. It was a little weird. It was cold, and I spent a lot of time in bed, watching TV and then I had a little mishap midweek where I just hated everything. I then started to read Twist and Shout (A destiel fic) that made me sob, so I didn't have the energy to write this. Then, I was ill today so I thought that I'd use all the energy I have to write this.
I promise it will get better, but opinions are welcome xox
P.S ALSO CAN WE SAY CLICHE PLEASE?! SIGH
It had been 2 weeks and Gerard hadn't left Frank's side, except to go to the bathroom, but there was a bathroom at the bottom of Frank's room, so Gerard didn't have to leave. Despite admitting that they both were better off without each other, Gerard wanted to wait until Frank was awake before he left. Gerard wanted to know that Frank was okay before he left his side, he wasn't just going to leave Frank here on his own. Gerard still felt a little guilty about all the event that had happened. Gerard didn't sleep though, how could he sleep with all these people around him? They could come in at any time and stare at him or touch him. He couldn't trust these people. And he never would.
"I really want you to wake up now, I don't like it here on my own," Gerard said from his chair beside Frank's bed, "You've forced me to do this, and I didn't want to."
Gerard had often done this, just let out his feelings to Frank while he was in his deep sleep, "You made me see them, and I didn't want to. You've made me come here, and I never wanted to. Don't you see that you're not helping me?"
Gerard's voice was squeaking in anger and he felt guilty then, because Frank had helped him so much. "I've ruined your friendship with Mikey, probably lost you your job and you still try and help me."
"You've helped me in some ways," Gerard breathed out a breathy laugh, "You've made me feel more beautiful than I ever have before. But this just proves that you're not good for me. You'll just be passing me on your life journey and then you'll leave me behind. Finding a girl and then getting married."
Gerard needed to say this to Frank, he felt like he had bottled it up since he found out that Frank was accepting of having Gerard's parents come to his house.
"I hate you, Frank," Gerard sighed and let go of Frank's hand, to glare at the floor, "I hate you so much because you're destroying yourself by being my friend. You could have left. I gave you the chance!"
Gerard was in his own world too much to notice that Frank's eyes were open and he was struggling to breathe with the machine still down his throat that was feeding him. His body started to arch as he tried to breath and nurses rushed in to help Frank. Gerard just stared in shock from the seat he was sat in.
The nurses pulled the tube from Frank's throat and he coughed and gagged and Gerard felt a little nauseous. Then the nurses spent the next 30 minutes asking Frank questions to check his memory and if he was okay. These questions usually consisted of trivial questions, like his name, the president's name, where he was born, his mothers name and if he had any pets.
"I remember everything okay?" Frank sighed, "Can I please talk to Gerard alone now?"
The nurse nodded and left, leaving Gerard and Frank on their own.
"Your voice is deep and scratchy. It sounds like you've been smoking for 10 years straight," Gerard pointed out, not really wanting to repeat what he had said to Frank. He knew that Frank could remember, he had practically just admitted it.
"Do you really hate me, Gee?" Frank asked, his head facing Gerard's while his body remained straight, "B-because I couldn't be more in love with you. And I'm not afraid to say it anymore, we've been through too much to be afraid of feelings now."
"But if you," Gerard coughed awkwardly, "If you loved me, why would you let them near me? I told you they hated me, I told you they would hate me and I told you that they'd always hate me."
Frank turned his head a little so that he was staring at the white washed ceiling, and thought for a while. He didn't really know how to respond correctly. He could tell the truth, but he could also lie. In this situation, he thought it would probably be best to just tell the truth.
"I wanted to make them jealous, or proud, I don't know." Frank ran a shaky hand through his greasy hair and grimaced, "I wanted them to see that I love you, and that you were amazing and that you had made something of yourself."
"They know that already Frank," Gerard pointed out fairly, "They're always going to know that and hate me for it."
"Gerard come on, please. Just, give me one more chance okay. I'll never let anyone get that close to hurting you again," Frank begged.
Gerard shook his head, "No, Frank. Because yeah, that punch would have hurt me. It would have hurt a lot. But you getting hurt, and being in a coma, hurt me more than that could have."
This time, Frank shook his head. "I'm going to prove to you how much you mean to me. I promise."
A/N: I had a lazy (sort of) week. It was a little weird. It was cold, and I spent a lot of time in bed, watching TV and then I had a little mishap midweek where I just hated everything. I then started to read Twist and Shout (A destiel fic) that made me sob, so I didn't have the energy to write this. Then, I was ill today so I thought that I'd use all the energy I have to write this.
I promise it will get better, but opinions are welcome xox
P.S ALSO CAN WE SAY CLICHE PLEASE?! SIGH
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