Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > A kiss and I will surrender
Pov. Frank.
Every word that fell from Ray's lips stabbed through my heart like hideous knives. How can he just talk about her so calmly? Tears burned my cheeks and i tried to keep myself under control, i bit my lip to try and stop myself from crying out in bereavement for Jamia even at the thought of her. My strength to keep calm was broken when i heard the next dreaded words i knew were coming.
"..She was pregnant..."
These words were enough to make me give up altogether. I made another mournful weep and buried my face into the floor and pulled my knees to me as close as possible. I just want to disappear.. Another load of heavy tears poured down my face onto the floor as thoughts of her came into my head, her smile, her laugh, the sparkle in her eyes when she talked about something she loved, the way she'd kiss me.. it all seems so surreal that she actually died. And yet the image of what i found that day wont leave my mind.
It feels like i could go home right now and find her in the back yard playing with our dogs as happy as she always was but i cant. All that's left there for me now are horrid memories and pain.
A soft voice interrupted my deadly thoughts.
"Are they dead?" Gerard's voice was full of grief and was barely above a whisper. Silence and then a low sigh came after. "i had no idea.. im so sorry.." He whispered, and he leant over me to touch my shoulder.
I flinched away from him, i didnt want anyone to feel sorry for me. the last thing i needed was one of my oldest friends seeing me like this. im so broken.
I used the wall to get up shakily. "im f- im fine, ger- gerard, dont worr-y.." I try and say through sobs. I cant see anything through my tears that seem like they are permanently flowing from my eyes, so i just try and move towards where i think the door is, bumping into walls and doors on the way. I find a chair inside and sit down immediately wiping my face with my old tattered hoodie. I was quickly followed back in by Gerard, Mikey and Ray. Of course not Bob; he didnt care. He was still sat in his chair in the corner of the room sipping his coffee avoiding eye contact. I pretended i didnt care either and just shot him a pissed off look in his direction, but of course it hurt. He was my bestfriend.
Every word that fell from Ray's lips stabbed through my heart like hideous knives. How can he just talk about her so calmly? Tears burned my cheeks and i tried to keep myself under control, i bit my lip to try and stop myself from crying out in bereavement for Jamia even at the thought of her. My strength to keep calm was broken when i heard the next dreaded words i knew were coming.
"..She was pregnant..."
These words were enough to make me give up altogether. I made another mournful weep and buried my face into the floor and pulled my knees to me as close as possible. I just want to disappear.. Another load of heavy tears poured down my face onto the floor as thoughts of her came into my head, her smile, her laugh, the sparkle in her eyes when she talked about something she loved, the way she'd kiss me.. it all seems so surreal that she actually died. And yet the image of what i found that day wont leave my mind.
It feels like i could go home right now and find her in the back yard playing with our dogs as happy as she always was but i cant. All that's left there for me now are horrid memories and pain.
A soft voice interrupted my deadly thoughts.
"Are they dead?" Gerard's voice was full of grief and was barely above a whisper. Silence and then a low sigh came after. "i had no idea.. im so sorry.." He whispered, and he leant over me to touch my shoulder.
I flinched away from him, i didnt want anyone to feel sorry for me. the last thing i needed was one of my oldest friends seeing me like this. im so broken.
I used the wall to get up shakily. "im f- im fine, ger- gerard, dont worr-y.." I try and say through sobs. I cant see anything through my tears that seem like they are permanently flowing from my eyes, so i just try and move towards where i think the door is, bumping into walls and doors on the way. I find a chair inside and sit down immediately wiping my face with my old tattered hoodie. I was quickly followed back in by Gerard, Mikey and Ray. Of course not Bob; he didnt care. He was still sat in his chair in the corner of the room sipping his coffee avoiding eye contact. I pretended i didnt care either and just shot him a pissed off look in his direction, but of course it hurt. He was my bestfriend.
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