Categories > Original > Humor

Valentine's Day Special 2014

by ValentineRevenge 0 Reviews

Avengers. Thor won't stop pestering Loki to participate in Valentine's day until he gives in. However, Thor forgets his brother is known as the God of mischief for a reason.

Category: Humor - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Humor - Characters:  - Warnings: [?] - Published: 2014/02/15 - Updated: 2014/02/15 - 1219 words - Complete

Just a little speck of a fic meant for Valentines Day. Personally, I'm in no way, shape or form a fan of Valentine's Day, which you can probably tell by whatever this is.

"But why not?" Stark tower echoed with the petulant whine of Asgard's crown prince.

"As I have mentioned to you numerous times before, Thor, I see no point in a day specifically set aside for the celebration of such a fickle emotion as love." His younger brother Loki replied with a sigh.

"But love isn't a fickle emotion!"

This outburst wasn't dignified with an answer aside from a page in a spellbook being flipped.

"Come on, it's a time when people trade flowers, and candies, and little stuffed animals!" Thor pleaded, trying to get his brother to change his opinion on the holiday.

"Trade them for what exactly?" An eyebrow was raised to accentuate this reply.

"Well, more of the same."

"Now why would I want to trade one thing for something exactly like it?" Loki still hadn't looked up from his book.

"Because, brother, it's a symbol of loving someone!"

"So in essence, the Day of Valentines is a day set aside specifically intended for people to trade trinkets, plants, and sweets with each other to prove that they love them." The sorcerer stated in disbelief at the abject pointlessness of it all.

"Exactly!" Thor thundered in approval, a wide grin splitting his features. He had finally managed to make his cold-hearted sibling understand the meaning of Valentine's Day.

"That is easily one of the most pointless things I have ever heard of in my life."

As quickly as the smile came across the blonde's face, it was quickly wiped off. "Aww, come on, just give it a try!"

"I see no point in it."

"Please?"

"No."

"Come on!"

"My answer remains the same."

"Loki!"

"No amount of badgering is going to make me say yes, Thor."

"Will you just think about it?"

"No."

"I'll tell Stark to get rid of all your honey. And your books." Thor finally said, crossing his arms in frustration.

Loki huffed a sigh. His idiot brother had delivered a low blow. Previously, he wouldn't consider the moron capable of making a threat that would actually hurt him. Maybe the oaf was smarter than he let on. "Fine." He said in a monotone voice.

"You will?" Thor asked, grinning.

"Yes." The word sounded forced, and full of distaste, almost as if the speaker were choking on it.

"I knew you would come around!" Thor crowed, attacking the smaller male in a large hug, practically squashing him.

"Get off me!" Was the spluttered reply, accompanied by slender hands beating at the crown prince's large torso.

"The Day of Valentines is in 2 days time, brother!" Thor chirped as he let go of the offended sorcerer and exited the room.

Two days? How could Loki spin this in his favor to escape the Avengers' wrath?

The next day, he paced around his room, head in hand, scheming against his captors. After all, his brother did say that Valentine's Day was a day to exchange various plants, trinkets, and candies. The only thing is, the oaf hadn't quite specified what type of plants, trinkets and candies were to be exchanged. Maybe this whole Valentine's Day thing could work out for him. A devious smirk spread across his face.

The day after was Valentine's Day. Keeping somewhat true to his promise to his brother, Loki had given gifts to each of the Avengers. He had sent a boquet of stinging nettles to Black Widow, and poison ivy, tastefully arranged around a trellis, to Tony Stark. Hawkeye, Nick Fury, and Captain America had recieved plushies of themselves, with pins stuck in various places, mainly joints, the head, and vital organs, quite like a voodoo doll. The Hulk and Thor had recieved boxes of laced chocolates.

Through scrying, Loki was able to figure out the true extent of the damage that he had created, and sat back in his room, chuckling to himself. Natasha and Stark were both dealing with the unpleasant after-effects of handling the plants he had sent to them, and most likely would be unable to do very much with their hands without pain for the next several days. Nick was outraged at the audacity of the God of mischeif, while Steve and Clint seemed to be on edge, looking over their shoulder, and for every minor spasm or discomfort, questioning if that was just some bad sushi, or was it organ failure from the pins in the voodoo dolls.

Bruce and Thor, Loki was happy to say, were both glued to their respective porcelain thrones, courtesy of the chocolates, but he would have rathered he didn't have to see it for himself. He also would have preffered to be ignorant of the fact that whilst on the commode, Thor seemed to be rather taken with a magazine, "Seventeen", which judging by the cover, seemed to be geared towards Midgardian teen girls.

Loki was left in relative peace for several days, practically buzzing with joy over the outcome of his actions. However, after Thor had recovered, he stormed into the sorcerer's room, throwing open the door with such forced that it cracked the wall.

"What is the matter with you, brother?!" Thor bellowed.

"You told me that on the day of Valentines, one gifted small trinkets, plant arrangements, and boxes of sweets to others to express their feelings."

"Stark and Natasha are itching!"

"Poison Ivy and stinging nettles are plants, brother. They were also in a tasteful arrangement."

"Fury is pissed, and Steve and Clint are scared out of their minds!"

"Dolls, even voodoo dolls, are considered trinkets, are they not?"

"Bruce and me spent the last day on a toilet!"

"I should like to hope not the same toilet. Are you not aware that Exlax comes in chocolate flavors, and can be considered a type of chocolate, albeit not a very tasty one?" Loki replied, a smirk finally crossing his face.

"Loki!"

"I did exactly as you requested, brother. I gifted to the Avengers, yourself included, trinkets, plants and sweets on the Day of Valentines in order to express my feelings."

"But you made everyone sick or scared!"

"Maybe next time you will learn to take no as an answer, and comprehend that if I do not wish to participate in an activity, it is best left as such. Or at the very least, be specific about what sorts of an item you'd like for me to gift to you and your friends."

"I already said what to give!" Thor yelled, throwing his arms in the air in frustration.
"You gave me a category, not a specific. Stinging nettles are plants, just not one you'd rather enjoy handling."

"But you knew that!"

"You never said plants sans dangerous ones. You simply said plants." Loki replied with a shrug. "I did participate in your silly day of Valentines festival, did I not?"

"Yes but-"

"Then I see no further need of discussion on the subject then." The god of mischief dismissed his older brother with a wave of his hand.

He was in surprisingly good mood for the rest of the week, even when Jarvis informed him that they had run out of honey.
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