Categories > TV > Power Rangers > Times Present, Times Past
/Disclaimer: /Not mine, no money, no harm intended.
/Note: /Well, this is more or less a continuation of the previous chapter, so hopefully I'll get it done a little sooner. Keep your fingers crossed, okay? (Can't cross 'em myself; it's hell trying to type that way!) Enjoy, and please pass the feedback box on your way out? DB
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Times Present, Times Past Chapter 17: Forgive, Forget ...
/Late Tuesday Afternoon/
/ /
Kimberly and Aisha were talking quietly about everything and nothing - avoiding the one thing that was on all their minds, namely the situation with Tommy, Jason and Katherine - as they wandered idly towards the Youth Center from the Campbells' house. They hadn't exactly agreed to meet the others there, but somehow both girls knew that sooner or later the rest of the gang would find their way there as well. After all, it was their home away from home, the place where they'd spent most of their time together while still at school ... where everybody had got to know the others, and where a lot of very momentous events in all their lives had taken place. So it was only natural, even though they'd been scattered through the winds, that they would meet almost instinctively again in the one place that they all knew and loved.
Thus, the girls weren't surprised at all when they found Rocky lounging against the wall in the entranceway.
"Hi, girls."
"Hello, Rocky," Aisha greeted her old friend with a smile.
"Fancy meeting you here," Kim grinned.
Rocky chuckled. "'Of all the gin joints in all the world ...', huh?"
"Something like that," the petite girl laughed. "Only, I'm not Ilsa, and no offense, but you're not cynical enough to be Bogie!"
Rocky pouted, but shrugged good-naturedly. "Never wanted to be. The guy went bald in his twenties!"
"Eww," Aisha shuddered melodramatically. "No thanks!"
Kimberly looked around. "Is anybody else around?"
"Well, the Turbos were here when I arrived, but-" Rocky lowered his voice cautiously, making sure they weren't overheard, "they broke several landspeed records doing the usual vanishing act not much later. Guess You-Know-Who is at it again someplace."
"Meh," Kim sighed. "Figures."
"Yeah. Then again, it's kinda good they aren't around anymore, isn't it?" Aisha commented, her face thoughtful. "I mean ... we /were /going to discuss ... um ... /things/, weren't we?"
That drew a grimace from Rocky. "Have we done anything but /discuss /things in the last few days?" His question wasn't meant to be rhetorical, but neither girl answered because he was right.
"Yeah, well ... where are the others?" Aisha asked, looking back across the parking lot. Rocky's small red jeep was near the hedge, making use of the shade there, and the sidewalk was as yet empty of friendly faces.
"Adam's picking Tanya up at the radio station, Trini and Zack got held up at registration over at AGU, and Billy said he needed to do something about getting his driver's license back," Rocky reported. "I'm assuming that means he's stuck in a queue somewhere over at the DMV in City Hall."
"Oh, okay," Kim pouted. "That could take awhile, then. Why don't we grab a table and see whether Lt. Stone makes smoothies as good as Ernie's?"
"Sounds like a plan," Aisha agreed; "let's go inside, shall we?" She reached for the door handle, only to be stopped by Rocky.
"I wouldn't."
"Why not? I'm thirsty, and my feet are killing me ..."
"You don't wanna go in there," he murmured. "Not now, anyway. Trust me."
Kim frowned. "We do, but ... is there any special reason why we shouldn't go inside and be comfortable? It's hot out here!"
Her former teammate shrugged and stepped aside. "Be my guest, but I for one don't want to watch Tommy beat the crap out of the exercise equipment."
"Tommy? How'd he get here?" Aisha wondered. "I don't see his car ..."
"He's parked around the corner," Rocky told her. "He'd already arrived when I got here, so he's been at the punching for quite a while. He looked pretty upset, too."
Kimberly groaned. "Not /again/! Did he at least remember to put on gloves this time? The last time he was blowing off steam like that, I almost needed to take him to the ER, his knuckles were so badly bruised!"
"To be honest, I didn't stay long enough to see - but Lt. Stone is minding the store himself, and you know he's a real stickler for safety, so I'd think he made sure Tommy can't hurt himself ..."
"I guess," Kim murmured, frowning. "Boy, he must be feeling real bad if he's hitting the bags like I think he is." She couldn't help but remember how her former boyfriend had acted when they had still been trying to locate Jason and Katherine. Besides, she'd seen his black moods before.
"Can you blame him?" Aisha asked. "Just think how upset the rest of us were - are."
"Not really," Kim conceded. "Still, I wonder if ..." She never got to finish her thought, because right that instant two cars entered the parking lot - Billy's old Radbug (minus the bulky special speed enhancer he once had attached to it) and Adam's black jeep (lately decorated with a green pattern on both doors). Their friends drove as close to the entrance as possible, and all five left the cars; it seemed Adam had picked up Trini and Zack on his way to or from the radio station.
"Hi guys," Zack hailed the three, his usually mobile face uncharacteristically serious. "Why aren't you inside? Is our table occupied, or what?"
"No idea," Rocky shrugged. "I didn't check. We just didn't want to get in Tommy's way while he's maltreating innocent punching bags."
Tanya winced. "Oh boy. How long has been at it?"
"Dunno, but a while, I'd say. He'd already worked up quite a sweat when I arrived, and I've been waiting here for you guys for fifteen minutes or so when Kim and Aisha came just now."
"That long? He must be feeling worse than usual, then," Adam commented.
"Yeah - I was just wondering if maybe I should go and try to calm him down," Kim mused.
"That is a moot point by now, Kim," Billy said quietly. "Because here he comes."
As one, the group of friends turned to watch Tommy leave the building. He seemed freshly showered but was moving stiffly, and his expression was stormy under a forced veneer of calm - something they'd all seen before in one or the other crisis during their tenures as Rangers. Still, after exchanging a quick glance with Trini and receiving an encouraging nod, Kimberly took a step forward.
"Hi Tommy," she smiled, hoping he couldn't see how much his barely-controlled emotions affected her. "We were just about to join you ..."
"Don't bother on my account," he interrupted her curtly. "I'm leaving."
"Y-you are? Where to?" she asked, taken aback by his abrupt manner.
Tommy hesitated for a second, then apparently decided her question was innocuous enough. "I need to go talk to Kat."
Tanya barely swallowed a gasp. "I wish you wouldn't," she said softly, only to be silenced by a hard look.
"It's something I just have to do. Seeya." Without another word, Tommy wheeled around and strode off around the corner, leaving his friends staring after him. Seconds later, his car tore out of the Youth Center's parking lot and disappeared in the traffic.
"Man, he /is /worse than ever," Zack mumbled.
Trini sighed. "Let's just hope he'll be gentle with her."
"Yeah, especially today," Tanya agreed.
"Why, what's so special about today?" Kimberly wondered. "I mean, they /have /to talk things over eventually ..."
Tanya closed her eyes and shook her head wearily. "True, but I don't think Kat is in the right frame of mind for a confrontation right now."
"Is there any specific reason for your assumption, Tanya?" Billy enquired. "I called Jason last night for a lengthy conversation, and he seemed fine, albeit understandably subdued."
She stared at the blue-clad genius with a horrified expression. "Last night? You didn't," she exclaimed.
"As a matter of fact, I did," Billy replied, bewildered. "Why?"
Adam saw his girlfriend's eyes heat up and put a calming hand on her shoulder before she could say something he knew she'd regret later. "Tanya, simmer down. I guess Billy didn't know."
"Know what?" Aisha enquired as she watched her successor visibly calm herself. Tanya sighed.
"I called Kat after breakfast, to see whether she maybe wanted to talk anytime soon, and she told me-" she interrupted herself and drew a deep, steadying breath, "- Kat told me that today at eleven was their baby's funeral. The second one."
Rocky, Kim, Aisha and Billy paled as they realized what that likely meant for their friends. Adam, Zack and Trini just nodded sadly; apparently, Tanya had already told them on the way.
"Oh my," Kim murmured when she found her voice again. "Kat must feel totally bummed ... and Tommy's off to confront her /now/? In the mood he's in? Uh-oh."
"That's putting it mildly," Rocky agreed. Then he looked up, his brown eyes wide with sudden insight. "Guys - d'you think it's possible he's so pissed because he's already talked to Jason?"
Billy swallowed hard, fresh feelings of guilt assailing him. If I had known last night that Jase was facing such an ordeal today, I could have waited with confessing my own inadequacies instead of calling him. But I didn't, and instead only added to the pain he must have been feeling. He'd poured out his own anguish to his oldest friend, and had only found acceptance and absolution from his perceived wrongdoings. What that must have cost Jason, he could not begin to guess. How like Jason ... to put his friends' concerns over his own!
"A likely hypothesis," he said hoarsely. "Once Tommy has decided on a course of action, he rarely hesitates to implement it, and as he obviously is set on getting the explanations he's indubitably due today ..."
"... it's more than likely he was beating up the equipment because he already /has /spoken to Jase, and didn't like what he heard," Rocky finished. "Shit!"
"Uh huh. And knowing Jase, he never breathed a word of what /he's /going through, figuring he owes Tommy big time," Zack groaned. "What a recipe for disaster!"
"Affirmative," Billy nodded, looking unhappy. He was mentally kicking himself all the way back to Aquitar, but decided that /this /time, he was going to deal with his guilt by himself. /Under no circumstances will I burden my friends with my shortcomings again, /he vowed.
Aisha sighed. ""Well, let's hope Tommy won't be /too /hard on Kat."
"He's in love with her," Kim reminded her friend. It hurt to say it out loud, more than it should, but she had to face facts, not give in to unrealistic daydreams of what-might-have-beens. "That's gotta count for something, right?"
"Let's hope so," Adam said soberly. "But listen - now that Tommy's gone, is there any reason we can't continue this inside? I feel we're gonna be talking a long time today - again," he continued with a wry grin, "and I for one would prefer to be comfortable while we're at it. Or at least have something to drink to go with the talking."
"A good suggestion, Adam," Trini approved. "Come on, guys." She stepped up to the Youth enter's door, inviting her friends to join her with a look and a gesture. Shrugging, the others followed.
···
Tommy approached the Hillards' house purposefully. He had a few misgivings about confronting Kat, yes, mostly because he feared what she might tell him - what if she's leaving me for Jason? - but suppressed them in his overwhelming need to get to the bottom of everything. To find out the /truth/. Of one thing he was sure, despite everything that had happened - Kat wouldn't lie to him.
Kat owes me an explanation. Stuck in the past for long or not, she had no right to just go and shack up with my best friend - having a baby with him, even. There's no excuse for that!
/ /In the dark hours of night since Saturday, he'd asked himself if he could ever forgive his girlfriend for betraying him like that, but was reluctant to let her go nonetheless. His relationship with the lovely blonde meant too much for him to just toss it out the window without at least /trying /to understand why she'd done what she had.
Besides, Jason told me he was the one who made the first move... /Even feeling as angry and hurt as he did, Tommy reluctantly ackowledged to himself that Jason wouldn't have lied to him, not about something as serious as this. He pretty much admitted that he ... well, seduced her. In that case, I can't really blame Kat for taking what comfort she could ... and she probably felt like she kinda owed him something for protecting her all that time. She's nice like that. And she'd never have made it for two years in the past on her own./
/ /Tommy firmly rejected the idea that Katherine's role in the whole affair had been anything but that of a damsel in distress; after all, she had a habit of often calling on /him /for help and protection. Resolving to give her at least the benefit of doubt before he made a decision about their future together, he rang the doorbell. Within seconds, he heard someone cross the hallway.
The door opened, and he was greeted by a subdued-looking Doris Hillard.
"Tommy," she said with a tired smile. "How are you?"
/Lousy, /he wanted to say. /Your daughter betrayed me with my best friend. /But good manners, at least, forbade him to utter the words, so he just shrugged.
"Okay. Sorta."
Doris winced slightly, remembering why the young man would be feeling uncomfortable, but opened the door nonetheless. "Um, yes. Of course. Come in, please."
Tommy waited until she'd closed the door again before coming right to the point. "I'd like to ... no, I /need /to talk to Kat."
Doris sighed. "Yes, you do. But ... are you sure it can't wait until tomorrow?"
He nodded determinedly. "Yes."
"Very well then. Katherine is in the conservatory out back; you know the way, right?"
"Yeah, thanks." Doris gestured him on towards the living room through which he needed to pass and Tommy took a step forward, but was halted by a touch on his shoulder.
"Just ... be gentle with her, please? Kat's not exactly up to a lot right now."
It was the same request Jason's mother had made of him, and Tommy felt his irritation flare. With difficulty, he squashed the impulse to sneer and/or lash out at overprotective parents. Why the hell is everyone asking me to be 'gentle'? Your precious babies are all grown up now, for cripes' sake! And they created this mess all by themselves, not me!
"Sure, no problem," he muttered. "Can I go see her now?" As the question passed his lips, he was uncomfortably suspicious that he might have sounded like a petulant grade-schooler, but didn't really care; his need for an explanation overrode every other consideration.
"Of course. I'll be in the study if you should need me." With that, Doris let him go and stepped back. Sighing deeply, she returned to her book, knowing that she wouldn't remember a single word she'd attempt to read.
···
Tommy stopped at the French doors leading into the sunny conservatory. Kat was sitting on the small rattan love seat, curled up with her arms wrapped around her knees ... like she was freezing to death. What he could see of her face looked pale and drawn. She didn't react to his entry, seemed lost in her own, private little world, the very picture of dejection.
A part of his mind, the one seething with anger and indignation, gloated at the sight. /Serves her right! /But Tommy silenced that mean little voice. Kat was too obviously miserable. /As well she should be! /Tommy felt a preverse kind of satisfaction, though, as if her misery somehow vindicated and justified his own. Still, he couldn't help himself softening slightly towards his girlfriend. Not really knowing what to say or how to begin, wanting to avoid startling her, he cleared his throat. There was no reaction, so he did it again, slightly louder.
Still nothing. Aw, MAN!
/ /Somewhat exasperated, Tommy came closer until he stood almost beside the narrow sofa. "Kat?" he called out quietly.
She didn't even flinch. Just a minute stiffening of her shoulders indicated that Kat had heard him. As if in slow motion, the blonde head lifted and she turned her face fully towards him. Despite himself, Tommy was shocked at the expression in the reddened, swollen blue eyes - they were surrounded by dark circles, looking almost bruised ... and held the saddest, most tragic look he had ever seen on another being.
"T-tommy?" she whispered hoarsely.
"Yeah," he replied, warily watching her get up from her huddled position. Kat took a stumbling step towards him.
"Y-you came," she mumbled, a touch of incredulity in her voice. "You finally came!"
Non-plussed, he nodded. "Uh huh. I had to."
"Oh, Tommy!" With a cry that mingled a myriad of emotions - pain, relief, regret, guilt and a host of others he couldn't readily identify, Kat lurched forwards, directly into his arms. Surprised, Tommy could do nothing but catch her before she fell.
"I'm s-sorry," she wailed, clinging to his shoulders. "I never meant to hurt you, I would rather have died than hurt you, but I know I did it anyway, and I never meant to ... I'm sorry, so sorry," she babbled repeatedly, sobbing now, as she buried her head against his neck.
"I tried," he murmured, patting the slender back a bit awkwardly. "We didn't know about the time shift at first; we tried everything we could think of, but ..."
Kat hardly heard what he said, too lost was she in her own private grief. Tears were streaming down her cheeks and she was too exhausted to check them, even though Tommy's red shirt was already becoming soaked. The day had been even worse than she'd feared; burying her baby a second - and final - time, and Jason standing so close beside her at the tiny grave, yet at the same time so infinitely far away, had drained her to the utter limit. Nothing her parents could say or do - and they'd tried everything they could think of until they decided at last that the best they could do was just give her space and time to heal - had helped. Kat only knew that she needed to be held in the worst way, even more so than when she'd given up hope for rescue in the past, and now Tommy was /here/, he had come at last ...
"I needed you so," she mumbled through her tears, so choked-up that Tommy could barely make out the words. "I wanted you to come /so much/, but you never did, and I was so alone ... Jason was /there/, and he cared, and I needed to be held ... it was so long, and there seemed to be no hope, and I missed you every day ... oh Tommy," she cried, "why didn't you rescue me?"
"I would have if I could," he groaned, overwhelmed with emotions. To learn that Kat had yearned for him, that she'd /needed /him was like a soothing balm to his own pain. "But we didn't know, we had no idea ..."
"We waited so long," Kat hiccuped, hardly hearing him. "There was no one - no one - to help us, we had only each other, and we were so lonely, so tired of waiting ... we tried not to give up hope, but after a year ..." Kat sobbed again, her voice half-muffled by her tears and Tommy's strong shoulder. "If we had known why you didn't come ... but we felt really lost, and when we kissed, it felt so good, so comforting, we didn't want to stop, and ..."
Tommy understood only half of Kat's incoherent rambling at best because she was crying so hard. All he heard was, 'I wanted you, you weren't there, I was lonely without you'. Or at least that was what he wanted /to hear. He never caught the 'we', or if he did, his mind refused to process it. After what Jason had admitted to him earlier, he simply came to the conclusion that without him, Tommy, to protect or help her, Kat had just reached the end of her tether in the past, that she had been in need of someone - /anyone - to comfort her, and Jason had taken advantage of the situation. /My best friend. Yeah, right. Well, no more! /Instead of being grateful that there had been someone there for Kat at all, Tommy ruthlessly dismissed Jason and their friendship from his mind and instead focussed on the girl in his arms.
Kat was so obviously contrite and regretful, he felt himself gradually softening towards her. If she had really longed only for him, taken up with Jason only out of despair and loneliness, he supposed he could find it within him to forgive her. Eventually, anyway. Tommy knew himself well enough to realize that he wouldn't be able to just shrug off what had happened. But now, seeing that Kat was so deeply affected by everything, he was getting ready to let bygones be bygones. He tightened his arms and cuddled Kat closer to his chest, slowly beginning to relish the feel of her against him again. This is good. It's been far too long since I held her like this.
Kat sensed the gradual relaxation in Tommy's frame; at first, he had stood stiffly, like a stranger. Now, his embrace was growing warmer, more like she remembered it. The feeling steadied her frazzled nerves and enabled her to stop crying at last. She'd done way too much of that already over the past couple of days. Sighing deeply, she sniffled one last time and laid her head wearily on Tommy's shoulder.
/This is how it was when Jason comforted me, /a tiny little part of her brain whispered, but she ignored it. Jason was the past - literally - and she wanted Tommy back, craved his forgiveness, or at least his presence. Maybe, if he could find it in himself to look past her betrayal, she could find peace again ...
She swallowed hard and eased back a little, looking directly at him.
"Forgive me," she requested hesitantly, her voice still roughened with the tears she'd shed. "I know I have no right to ask it of you, but ... if you can believe me ... I never stopped loving you. I'm truly sorry for hurting you."
Tommy met her anxious glance, trying to read her intent. What he saw in the blue eyes was a deep grief and pain that probably equalled his own. /I wasn't the only one hurt by what happened, /he realized. /If I'd been able to come get her, Kat would never have betrayed me. But I wasn't, and Jase took advantage of the situation ...it wasn't really Kat's fault. /Deep inside, he knew that the situation couldn't have been this clear-cut, that there might have been other things at work, but he chose not to deal with that in the here and now. What counted was that Katherine still wanted /him/, that she was properly contrite, and that with any luck, they could put the whole sorry mess behind them.
/Besides, I won anyway. She's back with me, not with Jason. And she still loves me! /A small surge of triumph filled him, and when Kat repeated her plea for forgiveness, more anxious now, Tommy came to a decision.
"Sure," he replied, hugging her. He quirked a wry grin. "It'll take a while to forget what happened -" she's not getting off that easy, he couldn't help thinking,/ /"- but I do forgive you."
Kat bit her lower lip, hard, as she felt her shoulders sag in relief. "Thank you," she whispered humbly. I'll never want to forget my baby anyway. If I do, it'll be like she never lived at all ... and she did. She did! Cautiously, she dared return Tommy's hug and was glad to feel the answering pressure of his arms around her.
Tommy grunted a little. "Just let's not talk about it anymore, okay?"
"Wh-what do you mean?" Kat asked, bewildered.
"It's over and done with. You're back, with me, where you belong. If we're ever to get completely past it, we don't need to rehash everything," Tommy replied firmly. Surely that wasn't too much to ask? He did not /want to hear about what Jason had done, how he'd likely protected Kat from things that went bump in the night and stuff, and most of all he had no interest /ever /in hearing about the baby. It would just be a reminder of the very thing he wanted to banish from his mind most of all - that his girlfriend had once been intimate with his /former! /best friend. /The sooner she forgets about it, and Jason, the better it'll be. For her, and for both of us.
"I ... I guess," Kat murmured sadly, not entirely convinced, but willing to go along with his request anyway. She supposed Tommy had a point; if their relationship should have any chance of surviving, she mustn't remind him of what had transpired between herself and another man. Besides, she owed him for more than that. "If that's the way you want it ..."
"I do. It's the best way," he declared. "Best for /us/."
"O-okay." Kat gulped. Something about this course of action didn't seem right, but she was too exhausted to put a finger on exactly what, so she let it pass. Maybe at some later day, when they all had calmed down and emotions weren't running so high anymore, there'd be a chance to reconsider. In the meantime, she'd just concentrate on rebuilding her relationship with Tommy, to cope with her grief, to hopefully find a sympathetic ear in Tanya (and a shoulder to cry on if she needed it), and ultimately going back to school in London in a few short weeks.
/More than enough to deal with, /she mused, feeling herself begin to drift in contentment as Tommy kissed her brow tentatively at first, then with more determination as she made no protest. They sat down on the narrow sofa together, still hugging, when his lips wandered across her cheek towards her mouth. Giving herself gratefully up to that reunion, Kat had one last, slightly cheeky thought before she lost herself in the moment.
I'll just play Scarlett O'Hara for once.
/ /Tomorrow would be another day.
To Be Continued ...
/Note: /Well, this is more or less a continuation of the previous chapter, so hopefully I'll get it done a little sooner. Keep your fingers crossed, okay? (Can't cross 'em myself; it's hell trying to type that way!) Enjoy, and please pass the feedback box on your way out? DB
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Times Present, Times Past Chapter 17: Forgive, Forget ...
/Late Tuesday Afternoon/
/ /
Kimberly and Aisha were talking quietly about everything and nothing - avoiding the one thing that was on all their minds, namely the situation with Tommy, Jason and Katherine - as they wandered idly towards the Youth Center from the Campbells' house. They hadn't exactly agreed to meet the others there, but somehow both girls knew that sooner or later the rest of the gang would find their way there as well. After all, it was their home away from home, the place where they'd spent most of their time together while still at school ... where everybody had got to know the others, and where a lot of very momentous events in all their lives had taken place. So it was only natural, even though they'd been scattered through the winds, that they would meet almost instinctively again in the one place that they all knew and loved.
Thus, the girls weren't surprised at all when they found Rocky lounging against the wall in the entranceway.
"Hi, girls."
"Hello, Rocky," Aisha greeted her old friend with a smile.
"Fancy meeting you here," Kim grinned.
Rocky chuckled. "'Of all the gin joints in all the world ...', huh?"
"Something like that," the petite girl laughed. "Only, I'm not Ilsa, and no offense, but you're not cynical enough to be Bogie!"
Rocky pouted, but shrugged good-naturedly. "Never wanted to be. The guy went bald in his twenties!"
"Eww," Aisha shuddered melodramatically. "No thanks!"
Kimberly looked around. "Is anybody else around?"
"Well, the Turbos were here when I arrived, but-" Rocky lowered his voice cautiously, making sure they weren't overheard, "they broke several landspeed records doing the usual vanishing act not much later. Guess You-Know-Who is at it again someplace."
"Meh," Kim sighed. "Figures."
"Yeah. Then again, it's kinda good they aren't around anymore, isn't it?" Aisha commented, her face thoughtful. "I mean ... we /were /going to discuss ... um ... /things/, weren't we?"
That drew a grimace from Rocky. "Have we done anything but /discuss /things in the last few days?" His question wasn't meant to be rhetorical, but neither girl answered because he was right.
"Yeah, well ... where are the others?" Aisha asked, looking back across the parking lot. Rocky's small red jeep was near the hedge, making use of the shade there, and the sidewalk was as yet empty of friendly faces.
"Adam's picking Tanya up at the radio station, Trini and Zack got held up at registration over at AGU, and Billy said he needed to do something about getting his driver's license back," Rocky reported. "I'm assuming that means he's stuck in a queue somewhere over at the DMV in City Hall."
"Oh, okay," Kim pouted. "That could take awhile, then. Why don't we grab a table and see whether Lt. Stone makes smoothies as good as Ernie's?"
"Sounds like a plan," Aisha agreed; "let's go inside, shall we?" She reached for the door handle, only to be stopped by Rocky.
"I wouldn't."
"Why not? I'm thirsty, and my feet are killing me ..."
"You don't wanna go in there," he murmured. "Not now, anyway. Trust me."
Kim frowned. "We do, but ... is there any special reason why we shouldn't go inside and be comfortable? It's hot out here!"
Her former teammate shrugged and stepped aside. "Be my guest, but I for one don't want to watch Tommy beat the crap out of the exercise equipment."
"Tommy? How'd he get here?" Aisha wondered. "I don't see his car ..."
"He's parked around the corner," Rocky told her. "He'd already arrived when I got here, so he's been at the punching for quite a while. He looked pretty upset, too."
Kimberly groaned. "Not /again/! Did he at least remember to put on gloves this time? The last time he was blowing off steam like that, I almost needed to take him to the ER, his knuckles were so badly bruised!"
"To be honest, I didn't stay long enough to see - but Lt. Stone is minding the store himself, and you know he's a real stickler for safety, so I'd think he made sure Tommy can't hurt himself ..."
"I guess," Kim murmured, frowning. "Boy, he must be feeling real bad if he's hitting the bags like I think he is." She couldn't help but remember how her former boyfriend had acted when they had still been trying to locate Jason and Katherine. Besides, she'd seen his black moods before.
"Can you blame him?" Aisha asked. "Just think how upset the rest of us were - are."
"Not really," Kim conceded. "Still, I wonder if ..." She never got to finish her thought, because right that instant two cars entered the parking lot - Billy's old Radbug (minus the bulky special speed enhancer he once had attached to it) and Adam's black jeep (lately decorated with a green pattern on both doors). Their friends drove as close to the entrance as possible, and all five left the cars; it seemed Adam had picked up Trini and Zack on his way to or from the radio station.
"Hi guys," Zack hailed the three, his usually mobile face uncharacteristically serious. "Why aren't you inside? Is our table occupied, or what?"
"No idea," Rocky shrugged. "I didn't check. We just didn't want to get in Tommy's way while he's maltreating innocent punching bags."
Tanya winced. "Oh boy. How long has been at it?"
"Dunno, but a while, I'd say. He'd already worked up quite a sweat when I arrived, and I've been waiting here for you guys for fifteen minutes or so when Kim and Aisha came just now."
"That long? He must be feeling worse than usual, then," Adam commented.
"Yeah - I was just wondering if maybe I should go and try to calm him down," Kim mused.
"That is a moot point by now, Kim," Billy said quietly. "Because here he comes."
As one, the group of friends turned to watch Tommy leave the building. He seemed freshly showered but was moving stiffly, and his expression was stormy under a forced veneer of calm - something they'd all seen before in one or the other crisis during their tenures as Rangers. Still, after exchanging a quick glance with Trini and receiving an encouraging nod, Kimberly took a step forward.
"Hi Tommy," she smiled, hoping he couldn't see how much his barely-controlled emotions affected her. "We were just about to join you ..."
"Don't bother on my account," he interrupted her curtly. "I'm leaving."
"Y-you are? Where to?" she asked, taken aback by his abrupt manner.
Tommy hesitated for a second, then apparently decided her question was innocuous enough. "I need to go talk to Kat."
Tanya barely swallowed a gasp. "I wish you wouldn't," she said softly, only to be silenced by a hard look.
"It's something I just have to do. Seeya." Without another word, Tommy wheeled around and strode off around the corner, leaving his friends staring after him. Seconds later, his car tore out of the Youth Center's parking lot and disappeared in the traffic.
"Man, he /is /worse than ever," Zack mumbled.
Trini sighed. "Let's just hope he'll be gentle with her."
"Yeah, especially today," Tanya agreed.
"Why, what's so special about today?" Kimberly wondered. "I mean, they /have /to talk things over eventually ..."
Tanya closed her eyes and shook her head wearily. "True, but I don't think Kat is in the right frame of mind for a confrontation right now."
"Is there any specific reason for your assumption, Tanya?" Billy enquired. "I called Jason last night for a lengthy conversation, and he seemed fine, albeit understandably subdued."
She stared at the blue-clad genius with a horrified expression. "Last night? You didn't," she exclaimed.
"As a matter of fact, I did," Billy replied, bewildered. "Why?"
Adam saw his girlfriend's eyes heat up and put a calming hand on her shoulder before she could say something he knew she'd regret later. "Tanya, simmer down. I guess Billy didn't know."
"Know what?" Aisha enquired as she watched her successor visibly calm herself. Tanya sighed.
"I called Kat after breakfast, to see whether she maybe wanted to talk anytime soon, and she told me-" she interrupted herself and drew a deep, steadying breath, "- Kat told me that today at eleven was their baby's funeral. The second one."
Rocky, Kim, Aisha and Billy paled as they realized what that likely meant for their friends. Adam, Zack and Trini just nodded sadly; apparently, Tanya had already told them on the way.
"Oh my," Kim murmured when she found her voice again. "Kat must feel totally bummed ... and Tommy's off to confront her /now/? In the mood he's in? Uh-oh."
"That's putting it mildly," Rocky agreed. Then he looked up, his brown eyes wide with sudden insight. "Guys - d'you think it's possible he's so pissed because he's already talked to Jason?"
Billy swallowed hard, fresh feelings of guilt assailing him. If I had known last night that Jase was facing such an ordeal today, I could have waited with confessing my own inadequacies instead of calling him. But I didn't, and instead only added to the pain he must have been feeling. He'd poured out his own anguish to his oldest friend, and had only found acceptance and absolution from his perceived wrongdoings. What that must have cost Jason, he could not begin to guess. How like Jason ... to put his friends' concerns over his own!
"A likely hypothesis," he said hoarsely. "Once Tommy has decided on a course of action, he rarely hesitates to implement it, and as he obviously is set on getting the explanations he's indubitably due today ..."
"... it's more than likely he was beating up the equipment because he already /has /spoken to Jase, and didn't like what he heard," Rocky finished. "Shit!"
"Uh huh. And knowing Jase, he never breathed a word of what /he's /going through, figuring he owes Tommy big time," Zack groaned. "What a recipe for disaster!"
"Affirmative," Billy nodded, looking unhappy. He was mentally kicking himself all the way back to Aquitar, but decided that /this /time, he was going to deal with his guilt by himself. /Under no circumstances will I burden my friends with my shortcomings again, /he vowed.
Aisha sighed. ""Well, let's hope Tommy won't be /too /hard on Kat."
"He's in love with her," Kim reminded her friend. It hurt to say it out loud, more than it should, but she had to face facts, not give in to unrealistic daydreams of what-might-have-beens. "That's gotta count for something, right?"
"Let's hope so," Adam said soberly. "But listen - now that Tommy's gone, is there any reason we can't continue this inside? I feel we're gonna be talking a long time today - again," he continued with a wry grin, "and I for one would prefer to be comfortable while we're at it. Or at least have something to drink to go with the talking."
"A good suggestion, Adam," Trini approved. "Come on, guys." She stepped up to the Youth enter's door, inviting her friends to join her with a look and a gesture. Shrugging, the others followed.
···
Tommy approached the Hillards' house purposefully. He had a few misgivings about confronting Kat, yes, mostly because he feared what she might tell him - what if she's leaving me for Jason? - but suppressed them in his overwhelming need to get to the bottom of everything. To find out the /truth/. Of one thing he was sure, despite everything that had happened - Kat wouldn't lie to him.
Kat owes me an explanation. Stuck in the past for long or not, she had no right to just go and shack up with my best friend - having a baby with him, even. There's no excuse for that!
/ /In the dark hours of night since Saturday, he'd asked himself if he could ever forgive his girlfriend for betraying him like that, but was reluctant to let her go nonetheless. His relationship with the lovely blonde meant too much for him to just toss it out the window without at least /trying /to understand why she'd done what she had.
Besides, Jason told me he was the one who made the first move... /Even feeling as angry and hurt as he did, Tommy reluctantly ackowledged to himself that Jason wouldn't have lied to him, not about something as serious as this. He pretty much admitted that he ... well, seduced her. In that case, I can't really blame Kat for taking what comfort she could ... and she probably felt like she kinda owed him something for protecting her all that time. She's nice like that. And she'd never have made it for two years in the past on her own./
/ /Tommy firmly rejected the idea that Katherine's role in the whole affair had been anything but that of a damsel in distress; after all, she had a habit of often calling on /him /for help and protection. Resolving to give her at least the benefit of doubt before he made a decision about their future together, he rang the doorbell. Within seconds, he heard someone cross the hallway.
The door opened, and he was greeted by a subdued-looking Doris Hillard.
"Tommy," she said with a tired smile. "How are you?"
/Lousy, /he wanted to say. /Your daughter betrayed me with my best friend. /But good manners, at least, forbade him to utter the words, so he just shrugged.
"Okay. Sorta."
Doris winced slightly, remembering why the young man would be feeling uncomfortable, but opened the door nonetheless. "Um, yes. Of course. Come in, please."
Tommy waited until she'd closed the door again before coming right to the point. "I'd like to ... no, I /need /to talk to Kat."
Doris sighed. "Yes, you do. But ... are you sure it can't wait until tomorrow?"
He nodded determinedly. "Yes."
"Very well then. Katherine is in the conservatory out back; you know the way, right?"
"Yeah, thanks." Doris gestured him on towards the living room through which he needed to pass and Tommy took a step forward, but was halted by a touch on his shoulder.
"Just ... be gentle with her, please? Kat's not exactly up to a lot right now."
It was the same request Jason's mother had made of him, and Tommy felt his irritation flare. With difficulty, he squashed the impulse to sneer and/or lash out at overprotective parents. Why the hell is everyone asking me to be 'gentle'? Your precious babies are all grown up now, for cripes' sake! And they created this mess all by themselves, not me!
"Sure, no problem," he muttered. "Can I go see her now?" As the question passed his lips, he was uncomfortably suspicious that he might have sounded like a petulant grade-schooler, but didn't really care; his need for an explanation overrode every other consideration.
"Of course. I'll be in the study if you should need me." With that, Doris let him go and stepped back. Sighing deeply, she returned to her book, knowing that she wouldn't remember a single word she'd attempt to read.
···
Tommy stopped at the French doors leading into the sunny conservatory. Kat was sitting on the small rattan love seat, curled up with her arms wrapped around her knees ... like she was freezing to death. What he could see of her face looked pale and drawn. She didn't react to his entry, seemed lost in her own, private little world, the very picture of dejection.
A part of his mind, the one seething with anger and indignation, gloated at the sight. /Serves her right! /But Tommy silenced that mean little voice. Kat was too obviously miserable. /As well she should be! /Tommy felt a preverse kind of satisfaction, though, as if her misery somehow vindicated and justified his own. Still, he couldn't help himself softening slightly towards his girlfriend. Not really knowing what to say or how to begin, wanting to avoid startling her, he cleared his throat. There was no reaction, so he did it again, slightly louder.
Still nothing. Aw, MAN!
/ /Somewhat exasperated, Tommy came closer until he stood almost beside the narrow sofa. "Kat?" he called out quietly.
She didn't even flinch. Just a minute stiffening of her shoulders indicated that Kat had heard him. As if in slow motion, the blonde head lifted and she turned her face fully towards him. Despite himself, Tommy was shocked at the expression in the reddened, swollen blue eyes - they were surrounded by dark circles, looking almost bruised ... and held the saddest, most tragic look he had ever seen on another being.
"T-tommy?" she whispered hoarsely.
"Yeah," he replied, warily watching her get up from her huddled position. Kat took a stumbling step towards him.
"Y-you came," she mumbled, a touch of incredulity in her voice. "You finally came!"
Non-plussed, he nodded. "Uh huh. I had to."
"Oh, Tommy!" With a cry that mingled a myriad of emotions - pain, relief, regret, guilt and a host of others he couldn't readily identify, Kat lurched forwards, directly into his arms. Surprised, Tommy could do nothing but catch her before she fell.
"I'm s-sorry," she wailed, clinging to his shoulders. "I never meant to hurt you, I would rather have died than hurt you, but I know I did it anyway, and I never meant to ... I'm sorry, so sorry," she babbled repeatedly, sobbing now, as she buried her head against his neck.
"I tried," he murmured, patting the slender back a bit awkwardly. "We didn't know about the time shift at first; we tried everything we could think of, but ..."
Kat hardly heard what he said, too lost was she in her own private grief. Tears were streaming down her cheeks and she was too exhausted to check them, even though Tommy's red shirt was already becoming soaked. The day had been even worse than she'd feared; burying her baby a second - and final - time, and Jason standing so close beside her at the tiny grave, yet at the same time so infinitely far away, had drained her to the utter limit. Nothing her parents could say or do - and they'd tried everything they could think of until they decided at last that the best they could do was just give her space and time to heal - had helped. Kat only knew that she needed to be held in the worst way, even more so than when she'd given up hope for rescue in the past, and now Tommy was /here/, he had come at last ...
"I needed you so," she mumbled through her tears, so choked-up that Tommy could barely make out the words. "I wanted you to come /so much/, but you never did, and I was so alone ... Jason was /there/, and he cared, and I needed to be held ... it was so long, and there seemed to be no hope, and I missed you every day ... oh Tommy," she cried, "why didn't you rescue me?"
"I would have if I could," he groaned, overwhelmed with emotions. To learn that Kat had yearned for him, that she'd /needed /him was like a soothing balm to his own pain. "But we didn't know, we had no idea ..."
"We waited so long," Kat hiccuped, hardly hearing him. "There was no one - no one - to help us, we had only each other, and we were so lonely, so tired of waiting ... we tried not to give up hope, but after a year ..." Kat sobbed again, her voice half-muffled by her tears and Tommy's strong shoulder. "If we had known why you didn't come ... but we felt really lost, and when we kissed, it felt so good, so comforting, we didn't want to stop, and ..."
Tommy understood only half of Kat's incoherent rambling at best because she was crying so hard. All he heard was, 'I wanted you, you weren't there, I was lonely without you'. Or at least that was what he wanted /to hear. He never caught the 'we', or if he did, his mind refused to process it. After what Jason had admitted to him earlier, he simply came to the conclusion that without him, Tommy, to protect or help her, Kat had just reached the end of her tether in the past, that she had been in need of someone - /anyone - to comfort her, and Jason had taken advantage of the situation. /My best friend. Yeah, right. Well, no more! /Instead of being grateful that there had been someone there for Kat at all, Tommy ruthlessly dismissed Jason and their friendship from his mind and instead focussed on the girl in his arms.
Kat was so obviously contrite and regretful, he felt himself gradually softening towards her. If she had really longed only for him, taken up with Jason only out of despair and loneliness, he supposed he could find it within him to forgive her. Eventually, anyway. Tommy knew himself well enough to realize that he wouldn't be able to just shrug off what had happened. But now, seeing that Kat was so deeply affected by everything, he was getting ready to let bygones be bygones. He tightened his arms and cuddled Kat closer to his chest, slowly beginning to relish the feel of her against him again. This is good. It's been far too long since I held her like this.
Kat sensed the gradual relaxation in Tommy's frame; at first, he had stood stiffly, like a stranger. Now, his embrace was growing warmer, more like she remembered it. The feeling steadied her frazzled nerves and enabled her to stop crying at last. She'd done way too much of that already over the past couple of days. Sighing deeply, she sniffled one last time and laid her head wearily on Tommy's shoulder.
/This is how it was when Jason comforted me, /a tiny little part of her brain whispered, but she ignored it. Jason was the past - literally - and she wanted Tommy back, craved his forgiveness, or at least his presence. Maybe, if he could find it in himself to look past her betrayal, she could find peace again ...
She swallowed hard and eased back a little, looking directly at him.
"Forgive me," she requested hesitantly, her voice still roughened with the tears she'd shed. "I know I have no right to ask it of you, but ... if you can believe me ... I never stopped loving you. I'm truly sorry for hurting you."
Tommy met her anxious glance, trying to read her intent. What he saw in the blue eyes was a deep grief and pain that probably equalled his own. /I wasn't the only one hurt by what happened, /he realized. /If I'd been able to come get her, Kat would never have betrayed me. But I wasn't, and Jase took advantage of the situation ...it wasn't really Kat's fault. /Deep inside, he knew that the situation couldn't have been this clear-cut, that there might have been other things at work, but he chose not to deal with that in the here and now. What counted was that Katherine still wanted /him/, that she was properly contrite, and that with any luck, they could put the whole sorry mess behind them.
/Besides, I won anyway. She's back with me, not with Jason. And she still loves me! /A small surge of triumph filled him, and when Kat repeated her plea for forgiveness, more anxious now, Tommy came to a decision.
"Sure," he replied, hugging her. He quirked a wry grin. "It'll take a while to forget what happened -" she's not getting off that easy, he couldn't help thinking,/ /"- but I do forgive you."
Kat bit her lower lip, hard, as she felt her shoulders sag in relief. "Thank you," she whispered humbly. I'll never want to forget my baby anyway. If I do, it'll be like she never lived at all ... and she did. She did! Cautiously, she dared return Tommy's hug and was glad to feel the answering pressure of his arms around her.
Tommy grunted a little. "Just let's not talk about it anymore, okay?"
"Wh-what do you mean?" Kat asked, bewildered.
"It's over and done with. You're back, with me, where you belong. If we're ever to get completely past it, we don't need to rehash everything," Tommy replied firmly. Surely that wasn't too much to ask? He did not /want to hear about what Jason had done, how he'd likely protected Kat from things that went bump in the night and stuff, and most of all he had no interest /ever /in hearing about the baby. It would just be a reminder of the very thing he wanted to banish from his mind most of all - that his girlfriend had once been intimate with his /former! /best friend. /The sooner she forgets about it, and Jason, the better it'll be. For her, and for both of us.
"I ... I guess," Kat murmured sadly, not entirely convinced, but willing to go along with his request anyway. She supposed Tommy had a point; if their relationship should have any chance of surviving, she mustn't remind him of what had transpired between herself and another man. Besides, she owed him for more than that. "If that's the way you want it ..."
"I do. It's the best way," he declared. "Best for /us/."
"O-okay." Kat gulped. Something about this course of action didn't seem right, but she was too exhausted to put a finger on exactly what, so she let it pass. Maybe at some later day, when they all had calmed down and emotions weren't running so high anymore, there'd be a chance to reconsider. In the meantime, she'd just concentrate on rebuilding her relationship with Tommy, to cope with her grief, to hopefully find a sympathetic ear in Tanya (and a shoulder to cry on if she needed it), and ultimately going back to school in London in a few short weeks.
/More than enough to deal with, /she mused, feeling herself begin to drift in contentment as Tommy kissed her brow tentatively at first, then with more determination as she made no protest. They sat down on the narrow sofa together, still hugging, when his lips wandered across her cheek towards her mouth. Giving herself gratefully up to that reunion, Kat had one last, slightly cheeky thought before she lost herself in the moment.
I'll just play Scarlett O'Hara for once.
/ /Tomorrow would be another day.
To Be Continued ...
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