(#) Electric_Sapphire 2006-12-29This is a wonderful, beautiful story, hon. It's clear that you put an awful lot of effort into description and prose, and it shows. It's times like these I wish the FidWad rating system went higher than 5- just for you, and this spectacular story. They say that a piece of fiction is never truly perfect, but you are a far better author than me, and so I can find very little that makes this less than perfect. I'm not quite sure if you mentioned what happened to Alphonse's book, though I might simply have missed it; also there's one punctuation error- a comma that should be a period- where you write, 'such a chord with him, It was... etc.' Otherwise, I can find nothing wrong, and everything spellbinding. Shame on the fools that haven't reviewed! Bless you, and keep on writing- especially this lovely pairing, sadly underwritten as it is.
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