Categories > Celebrities > Fall Out Boy > This Isn't What You Wanted.

Chapter 8 - Ayla finally meets her.......Uncle?

by whatkatydid 16 Reviews

ugh! time for sappy stuff.

Category: Fall Out Boy - Rating: G - Genres: Drama - Characters:  - Warnings: [!] - Published: 2006/12/12 - Updated: 2006/12/12 - 2072 words

Reviews

  • This Isn't What You Wanted.

    (#) MMMramen 2006-12-12 07:19:36 AM

    I must have done something right...I mean, first you update Not Looking and now this. Despite the virus wreaking havoc on my immune system and my terrible case "man voice", this totally made my day. The relationship between Bea and Ayla is stunning and wonderfully written. You can tell she really loves her little girl and the feeling is mutual.
    What a morning they had, breakfast at their favorite bakery owned by Bea's good friend Charlotte. Is it me, or was the a shout out? It made me smile.
    I also liked Patrick's interaction with Ayla. I imagine he'd be really good with kids, given he's kind of teddybear-esque. I'm liking the tension between Michael and Bea. I'm glad she realized that she shouldn't be with him anymore. He's jerk-ass....ahahhaaa! Anyway, great chapter. I'm giving you yet another rating point. Don't forget to walk him and feed him. Wow. My. Longest. Review. Ever. I need a nap.

    Author's response

    I'm uber impressed with this review. Thank you for picking up on all my favourite bits too. xxx
  • This Isn't What You Wanted.

    (#) MMMramen 2006-12-12 07:21:01 AM

    Ooooooh AND first reviewer. Double whammy!
  • This Isn't What You Wanted.

    (#) FrostedGlass 2006-12-12 10:29:09 AM

    The scenes with Ayla were so touching, Katy. The Patrick/hat scene... my heart's in a puddle down on the floor. :*)

    One rating point will have to do, my love.

    Author's response

    wow. Alex. Emotion. Hearts. Puddles. interesting. indeed. notice. disjointed. sentences. are. being. used.
  • This Isn't What You Wanted.

    (#) FrostedGlass 2006-12-12 10:45:30 AM

    Silly me... forgot to mention how cute I found Pete "Winter"! ;)

    Author's response

    I thought it was cute too....
  • This Isn't What You Wanted.

    (#) mandi21 2006-12-12 11:10:07 AM

    i love this story i cant wait until update again

    Author's response

    thank you for reviewing! :)
  • This Isn't What You Wanted.

    (#) pixied_secrets 2006-12-12 03:26:23 PM

    the chapter title threw me off, katy. you are a clever spice...

    I can tell you like writing about children, and you have interaction with them…it shows through marvelously in your writing. The way Ayla called him “Peter Winter”…that’s just too cute. "Mommy, you're silly! You can't eat me, I'm a real person!" I chuckled ‘cause that was, again, cute. Your writing is turning me into a sap, Katy. How am I suppose to be the bitchiest member of the DoJ with that kind of reputation? However, I insist you continue…

    It would remind her she had moral integrity and that she would fight to keep it and not be so willing to throw her moral sense away at the drop of one of his smiles. – I sure hope so. Michael is a douchebag.

    "That's between you and Pete......this is between Pete.....and his daughter." – Patrick is a wise man. I also love that Patrick noticed Pete’s mannerisms in Ayla…it shows the reader that it’s not just Bea that sees them, so they are obvious traits she received from him.

    All in all, you wrote one hell of a good chapter, British Spice. Have I told you lately that I love you? ‘Cause if not, here’s a rating point…

    Author's response

    blushes Spanks. I am so in love with my sistas
  • This Isn't What You Wanted.

    (#) patrickdance4me 2006-12-12 04:34:09 PM

    aw that is cute to the max. update soon please!
  • This Isn't What You Wanted.

    (#) peterpanswore 2006-12-12 05:27:02 PM

    i just wanted to let you know that this is pretty much my favorite story on here.

    Author's response

    ok, the only thing I have to offer in response to that is my actual soul, will that do?
  • This Isn't What You Wanted.

    (#) duckapple 2006-12-12 05:56:24 PM

    awwe.
    cute.
  • This Isn't What You Wanted.

    (#) duckapple 2006-12-12 05:56:47 PM

    almost forgot, babies?

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