Corner Comic Store With Ray.
What is this? Really I've picked up the worst comic, Otterman? I've fouled my hands maybe Ray has some hand sanitizer; wait why would Ray have that. I'm still holding this piece of crap, Gerard walk away.
Two minutes later
Phew thank something, Hellboy!
"Mikey called me about Alice."
Oh my god! That little stinker of a brother, i knew he'd do that. Why do i always have to share my feelings.
"Did he," I say gritting my teeth.
Ray opens his mouth but closes it. He knows not to go there, that is my very good don't go there face though Frank has told me it looks like something's in my ass. Note to self : hit Frank when he comes round for dinner tonight. Oh my god what is the time! If i'm having everyone over tonight I need to buy food. Why do i always forget, elephants don't...why i'm i going there.
"Yeah," he says into a comic book.
"Okay i got to buy some food when everyone comes round tonight."
He doesn't look up, he nods. Or at least i think he did, I'm running out the store. I didn't take the hellboy, its back there in the store I mean. Anyways, maybe they can splice my genes with an elephant, what if I grow a trunk, wait why would I grow a trunk...why am I talking to myself.
My cell is screaming its ringtone.
"Hello," I shout as I'm running.
"I hate you."
"I love you."
"No seriously, you hung up on me like a woman!"
I hang up, nobody calls me a woman. If he calls back I'll eat my phone. Tonight he's gonna get cold shoulderies, and maybe I'll over pepper his steak...over something to it. Why don't i have a car, I never realized the supermarket was far, really far. I'm on a magically quest to buy the one dinner to rule them all and such. I'm really talking about this aren't I, the funny thing is I'm not just thinking about dinner tonight, but that girl in the cafe earlier today. What is her name, maybe I'll go back tomorrow.
Ouch! I've just slammed right into the "out" doors. It was very Hollywood, i even had a little spit fly on the glass when my face collided with it. Wow dizzy, oh my I've fallen on the ground everyone is quite literally staring at me, why can't the world swallow me right now into a hole.
"Are you okay?"
Oh my giddy pants stay on me. It's her! This is so jarring.
"I'm fine," I say, i'm pretty sure that came out as "gaa gaa goo goo" because she's giving me that huh? look, "I'm fine really."
"Are you sure, you ran full throttle at that door."
She's pointing at it, I wince. I really made an ass of myself this time clap clap Gerard. Kill me NOW!
"No, no I'm good."
Walk away, walk away! Why are my legs ignoring me?
"Are you sure?"
"Oh yes," I say finally moving a leg.
"Your," she pauses to laugh softly, "your getting a bump."
Oh my she's touching my head, that's a body part, so she's touching me. SHUT UP DIRTY MIND!
"I'm Dylan, Dylan Corbie."
No," i laugh, "That's my middle name sorry, it's Gerard, Gerard Way."
"Oh," she smiles, "Well," she looks to her watch, "I best be getting home, my boyfriends waiting for me."
"Okay, nice meeting you Dylan."
"You too Gerard."
There she goes, walking away to her car, -whats the millage on that thing- wait what am i saying?
I slump into the grocery store. Why am I in this situation, I'm talking to the frozen corn, like they have an answer. Maybe I'll buy a huge tub of ice cream while I'm here. It's only two steps to get happiness in a tub and for five bucks that's not bad. Oh jeez this is heavy, note to self: call sergeon for hernia operation.
"MOMMY That man's eyes are bleeding!"
Thank you squirt. Maybe I'll show a little fang, ha that kid can run...so can his mother. Oh boy.
How am I supposed to cook for the guys when all I'm thinking about is her, and she's taken. I must be the only single guy in the world. Even the peacocks have someone...