I really shouldn't but I would..
Mikey and Ray shouldn't be home all day, Mikey was spending time with Linda and Ray had a new job.
I brought some food to my room.
Billy held the juice bottle and frowned at it, "Don't you have something stronger?".
I shook my head, "Mikey eliminated every bit of alcohol from the house, you were the only one who was giving me booze all this time. I think he threatened them or something".
"This Mikey guy sounds like a real pain in the ass", Billy made a face at the juice bottle.
My heart dropped, I didn't appreciate Billy saying that about Mikey but I didn't say anything, and I felt bad about it because I knew that if someone said I was a pain in the ass Mikey would bite their head off, I was such a bitch.
We worked a bit on our project but I continued to beat myself up for not standing up for Mikey when I saw a new cut on Billy's wrist, "Do you have something sharp with you?".
Billy followed my gaze to his wrist and nodded, he took a blade out of his wallet and handed it to me.
I got really excited and hot when I held it.
I gently marked a little line across my wrist, it wasn't even that painful anymore.
I was disappointed and I guess it showed on my face.
I got so frustrated that I couldn't even cut much deeper, I groaned with annoyance
Billy watched me with a smirk on his face, "Let me".
I gave him the blade, he took my arm and held the blade close to it, I could feel the coolness of the blade when suddenly I heard the front door slam and Mikey's voice echoed through the empty house, "Sky? Ray? Are you home?".
I jerked my hand in surprise and the blade in Billy's hand cut through my skin, making me cry in surprise.
I never cut that deep, it stung really badly and blood came from the wound. A lot of blood.
"Sky is that you?", Mikey got closer to my room.
I panicked. Mikey would freak out, my hand was bleeding like crazy and Billy was standing there with a fucking blade in his hands.
"Under the bed!", I hissed grabbing my bleeding wrist.
"What?", the smirk on Billy's face disappeared.
"Under the fucking bed", I kicked him to prove my point.
"Sky", billy looked at me with his jaw open, still clutching the blade I stained.
"He can't find you here like this! Hell would break loose. Under the bed Billy! Now!", I kicked him again.
He murmured something but did what he was told.
That very second the nob turned and mikey's head appeared in the doorway, "I didn't know you were home".
I smiled, sitting on the bed with my hand behind my back. I prayed he wouldn't come in and see the stained sheets.
It felt sticky and I felt weak, I didn't know if it was the blood I lost or was it the fear of Mikey freaking out on my ass.
He studied my face for a while, "Are you feeling OK? You're really pale".
"I'm fine. Everything is fine", I blurted really fast.
I started sweating, I could never pull this out. Mikey knows me better than I know myself.
"Are you sure?", he opened the door to come in.
"No", I exclaimed, "I'm sure. Just a bit tired. I think I'm going to take a nap now", I pretended to yawn.
He studied my face really carefully, I smiled a fake smile.
"I'm going to practise my bass now, if you need anything just say", he closed the door behind him.
I can't believe Mikey didn't just read me, I think the connection between us faded slowly away.
I totally forgot about my bleeding wrist until Mikey's bass brought me to life.
Billy crawled from under the bed, "I can't believe you made me hide under the fucking bed".
"Oh Mikey would've raised hell if he saw us like this", I whispered back.
"We should go back", he picked up our sketched and put them in his bag, I was grateful Mikey didn't notice his stuff.
"I'll just go wash my hand", I turned to leave, "Do you have a wrist band for me? Gerard kinda ripped mine".
"Always", he beamed.
I felt sick and his smile looked evil, the whole room was spinning.
At the bathroom I looked at myself in the mirror and hated the reflection.
I lied to one of the only guys who cared about me and let Billy say bad things about him.
I deserved the bleeding wound on my wrist.
I deserved the pain that went along with it.
I deserved the feeling of loneliness that came with it.
I deserved every shit I get.