- 34 reviews
Harry escapes britain, and learns the truth about the weirdest heritage ever. He learns stuff and gets some girls, too. There will be a lot of NC-17 here, and not much quality. I write to amuse my...5Original
The walrus said.
Harry learns more about himself, and loads about the female body. The fic's basic outline is revealed. Featuring ramblings, hints and a bit too much smut.
To talk of many things
Harry begins to adapt to his new reality. He learns some of the Who, the What and the How of things, and does his best. Featuring ramblings, bits of cow and some romantic smut. Guest star; The Gobl...
Of shoes, and ships, and sealing wax.
The arrival at the rabbit hole, and what harry found there. Letters, boobs and tailspinning Harry.
Of Cabbages And Kings
Smut and introductions. Harry gets his first lessons and a few shocks, too
- 16 reviews
Letters, Ladies, Lessons and Loopiness. His development continues, and he loses his legs. For a minute.5Hot
And Whether Pigs Have Wings
Sorcery? It's like riding a bicycle, right? The son-of-a-snake gets a challenge.
But Wait A Bit,
Awakenings. Bikes, babes and bondage. Lord of the mansion. He's finally getting somewhere.
The Oysters Cried
A memorial mishap, a teleological transformation and the hazard of helping hands. Oh yeah. Smut, too.
Before We Have Our Chat,
Some light housewarming, meet the inlaws and getting some real work done. Fluff alert, and a closing line i really wanted to use.
For Some Of Us Are Out Of Breath, And All Of Us Are Fat
Revelations, a wedding and a wedding night. Not for romantics or squeamish folks.
"No Hurry!" Said The Carpenter
The morning after, the Auror's oath, The Awakening of Lord Longbottom and Motala. Guest stars: Albus, Minerva and Luna.
They Thanked Him Much For That.
The Race. Dobby and the Director. Susan's wicked ways, and the downside to bicycle pants.
"A loaf of bread," the Walrus said,
Diagnosing Susan, a humble old bat, anecdotes of the great accountants, and one strange boarding school.
Is What We Chiefly Need
Farewell to scales, the Grand Old Ladies, and the enslavement of the Pureblood Princess.
Pepper And Vinegar Besides
In public again, Elaine's first public appearance, The Taunting of the Black Bella and a birthday.
Are Very Good Indeed
Battle, pressing engagements and Umbridge, round one. Vengeance, angst and some underage drinking.
Now If You're Ready, Oysters Dear,
A quick look at the world. Ginny, Luna and Hermione plans ahead, and the domestication of a feral Huldr, NC-17 style.
We Can Begin To Feed
The Lunarian Legion, a Poolside attack and the benefits of implants.One hell of an extreme makeover, a present for Ginny and Time to go to school.
"But Not On Us," The Oysters Cried,
Strangers on a train, Lordy Harry and the Pureblood oaths, buddies, twins and a Welcome Home worthy of Harry Potter
Turning A Little Blue
Hoggy Warty Hogwarts. Harry's first day in school, interrogation, intimidation, slight dismemberment, Deus Ex Machina and some smut, too. The birth of another legend.
After Such Kindness, That Would Be
Confrontation, intelligence gathering, a truly enchanted ceiling and Lady Hogwarts. A paper proves that Fudge is no thinking substance, and vanishing Bones.
A Dismal Thing To Do!
Violence, Hammerhead Diplomacy and the Ultimate Barmaids. War changes people, even when they don't quite happen. Another little slavegirl is acquired, and Draco gets off on the wrong foot.
"The night is fine," the Walrus said.
Of ravens with claws, a battle of Marks, the fate of Dawlish and i think there was some smut, too
- 19 reviews
The stupid fate of Theodore Nott, Goddesses by the bedside, Seamus' dream and the Them. There's explicit language in this chapter, but no actual smut.5Original
"It Was So Good Of You To Come!
A weekend off, and on. A most serious house warming party, and rent negotiations. Introductions, interrogations and one thoroughly distracted spy.
And You Are Very Nice!"
A morning after, a stroll downtown and a volatile approach to politics. Ron makes a distracted appearance, and a Girl and her elusive Prey.
The Carpenter said nothing but "Cut us another slice:
Re-flowering, investigation, conversation and some boinking, too.
I Wish You Were Not Quite So Deaf-
Heaven's on Fire, a decade of updates, a sex dream and a most unexpected letter. Meanie Harry and a truly horny girl. Smutty? You think?
I've Had To Ask You Twice
Voldemorts vacation, The woes of Miss Blue, the emerging Goddess,Jr and some cold November rain.
It seems a shame”, the walrus said,“To play them such a trick.
Tense fiends, lost robes and the proper use of a poop deck. A non-hunt for Horcruxes and the pure evil of a redneck armpit. Oh, there may be some senseless shagging too.
After we've brought them out so far, And made them trot so quick
Snapshots before Christmas. Not my best, but a continuation, anyway
The Carpenter said nothing but
An Other Christmas, and the woes of Jimmy Jinx.