Categories > Anime/Manga > Ouran High School Host Club

Losing You

by ElleBrat 3 reviews

Kaoru knows that he's losing his brother. He also knows that there's nothing he can do about it, other than hope that he's never completely forgotten.

Category: Ouran High School Host Club - Rating: PG - Genres: Angst - Warnings: [!] - Published: 2007-10-17 - Updated: 2007-10-18 - 877 words - Complete


A muffled groan.


A whine of protest.

"Hikaru, answer the phone..."

"You do it, Kaoru."

I buried my head into my pillow, kicking Hikaru as I did so.

"That's our Lord's tone. I don't want to answer it."

With a groan, Hikaru reached out and fumbled for his cell phone.

"Why does he have to call so early? It's third day of summer break." He muttered, sitting up. I sat, too, putting my arm around his shoulder and hugging him to me.

"Our Lord's an early riser." I didn't see the face he would've made at this, as I was too busy nuzzling his neck, trying to keep warm.

As soon as he flipped open the cover, our Lord's voice came through, making Hikaru wince and hold it at arm's length. I had shifted to the side slightly, pressing the sides of our heads together. After a while, my twin decided it was safe to put the phone to his ear. It was away again after a few seconds.

"Ne, calm down, maybe?" He snapped into the phone, probably tempted to throw it at the wall. I ran my hand over his arm in an attempt to calm him down. Neither of us liked getting up in the mornings, but Hikaru's temper was much worse than mine. It worked, and Hikaru was relaxing against me, but then he went rigid, eyes wide.

"Haruhi's missing?"


I knew it would be bad for me, right from the start.

Hikaru probably hadn't noticed her sneaking into our world, but I did. I made all efforts to avoid her, knowing that she would be the one to kidnap my Hikaru.

I knew I should've declined my invitation to the Host Club, but I couldn't - wouldn't - do that to Hikaru. He always has, and always will, deserve the best in life. He deserves friends, not some little twin brother who's the sole reason why he had none until High School.

Then, Haruhi joined. I had no choice but to act, act, act. Play nice. Pretend not to notice the looks Hikaru gave her, the way he treated her, the way he was slowly starting to pay more attention to her than to me.

We came home each day, and it was always the same. "Ne, Kaoru, do you think Haruhi knows which countries were involved in civil wars in the last ten years?" "Hey, Kaoru, what did you think of the way Haruhi handled our Lord?" "That was a great joke Haruhi made today, wasn't it, Kaoru?"

I don't think Hikaru noticed what was happening until we had our fight. When Haruhi pointed out who was who.

I remember how his hand fumbled for mine, how he clung to me like a lifeline. He was scared. I was, too, but I had become accustomed to it. Well, as accustomed as one could get to fear.

It was oddly comforting, knowing that Hikaru didn't want her in our world. But that didn't stop anything.

The way he looked at her after she told our customers that we switched colours... I knew, without a doubt, that I was losing my brother. A single glance out of the corner of my eye, with no returned look, was all the evidence I needed.

I had tightened my grip on his hand, and he was brought back down to Earth. He squeezed back, trying to offer comfort. I think he must have thought that I was still in shock at our world being visited.

...I think I would've liked that better than the reality.


The maids were in our room now. "Our room" is actually Hikaru's room. I do have my own, somewhere in the house, but I can never remember where it is. It's easier just to share a bed, anyway.

Besides, I wanted it - us - to last as long as it - we - could.

The maids were gone, Hikaru was resting his chin on his fingers, staring after them blankly.

"...It's boring without a toy." He said. I glanced at him from the corner of my eye again, and again, the look wasn't returned. I'm pretty sure my insides turned to steel then, my heart doing that thing where it constricts and becomes painful. Heart-break, I think they call it.

My brother was being stolen from me, and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it except to offer him my best wishes, and hope that I wasn't forgotten completely.

[Author's Notes:] This was written just after episode 15 was fan-subbed, and before emo!Kaoru was cool. No, seriously. I can't help it that a trend started and the manga only gave it canon backing. Though, if we really wanted to get into it, there's a pretty big argument that Hikaru's the one the angst writers should be picking on. That was a pretty big reaction from him, after all.

...Why yes, I do like referring to things only the readers of the manga know. It means I don't spoil anyone who doesn't read it, and that when I look back on this in a few months, I'll be amused when I try to figure out what I was saying. Small things, small minds, y'know? [/Babbling]
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