sorry for the long update! i had so much in my hands, and I did not know what to type down.
"Yeah, but his mom said he went ahead already." I said, looking down. It was a cold November morning, and all I wanted to do was lie in bed, or sit in front of a fire, just doing something quiet, like reading, or drawing. But it was a pretty awful obligation to go to school.
"So, did those feelings calm down, or are they still alive?" she asked.
"Um..they're still kicking." I said, looking down.
"Of all the guys in the world, why--" she started to ask, until I interrupted her.
"Why him? I don't know. He's the only guy who I seem to know better. He's the guy that actually lights me up. He likes the same things I do. He's not a fake. And, he actually got a little cuter over the summer, if you've noticed." I said.
"Wow, Cass, I've never seen you this serious about a guy." Michelle replied.
"I know. Me neither. It feels awkward. I mean, I had crushes on other guys, but this is Mikey we're talking about."
"He is pretty cool." Michelle said. The cold breeze blew over me, and I wrapped my arms around me to warm myself down. And that's when I wondered. How the hell did I ever get these feelings for my very own best friend? I suppose less than a quarter of boy-girl friendships ever fall in love with each other. I never knew just what it was about him that I loved so much. All of the while I never saw this coming.
"Michelle, what do you presume is going to happen?" I questioned.
"For what?" she replied.
"What will happen if I never told him? Or if I did?"
"Well, it seems as if these 'feelings' of yours are just a normal high school crush. If you never told him, then possibly you'll slowly slip away, and just see him as a friend. But then you'll be living with a heavy secret you so desperately would love to let out. If you told him, I think there is a chance he will react. But telling him is a 50/50 risk. He'll either love you back, or end your whole friendship you guys had for what, 16 years?" she answered.
"Basically, I'm screwed." I sighed.
"Oh, Cass, it's not that terrible. Don't make this into a huge problem. He still is your friend." She chuckled lightly.
We continued our walk to school, until we reached there.
"Michelle, just please, don't mention this to anyone. I would like this to just be between us and only us." I told her.
"You have my word." She replied. A typical morning before classes had come on. Michelle and I parted our ways. She headed to her group of girl friends, and I headed to my locker inside the school building. There, I would leave the books and belongings of mine that I would not need for the day, and grab a book to read. Then, I head for the cafeteria where I'd usually join in Mikey and his group of friends. But of course, I wouldn't talk to them, as I'm too busy being engrossed in my book. But that morning, they weren't there. I saw a small group sitting at the table where Mikey and his friends would usually be at. I went up to them.
"Hey, um, did you see anyone, perferrably Mikey, come to the cafeteria?" I asked the group.
"Sorry, no. But I did see him outside, talking to some girl." One of them said.
"I think it was Janet." another added. I nodded and left the cafeteria. Why in the world would Mikey be talking to her? I never thought he had the guts to. But that was in my perspective. I mean, Mikey's the quiet, shy type, so obviously, you know. I headed for the library instead. I don't want to waste my time looking for Mikey and some girl. I had a whole chapter of my book to finish. Besides, I wouldn't want to ruin their wonderful conversation.
Later that day, Mikey approached me.
"Cassandra, hey!" He seemed quite bubbly then.
"Wow, Michael, you never call me Cassandra." I replied.
"Yeah, sorry, Cass, I'm just so ecstatic." He said with quite a spark.
"Why?" I said smiling in tact to is mood.
"I asked Janet out to the Christmas dance. And she said yes!" He exclaimed punching my arm.
"Great!" I cried. Total devastation.