A window lift brings a surprise to Joan on a day where she thinks everything is going so wrong.
I wiped a tear off of my face before continuing to write in my notebook.
“For once I want to be put before the band. I want to be important to him again. I want to be near him and be his best friend again. But Ryan has taken over that roll, and I know Christine is disappointed about that too. We just want our boyfriends to be our best friends, yet we can’t even have that anymore. I want to go back to the way it was before they went on tour and I went away to college. It wasn’t going to tear us apart, but at the same time it was tearing us farther apart than we’ve ever been. We’ve been friends since kindergarten, best friends since seventh grade, and a couple since sophomore year of high school. I don’t know how to function without him in my life. He is my everything and holds the key to my heart. As cliché as it sounds, he completes me, and, without him, I don’t know who I am. Maybe it will be good for us to be apart? It’s decided. Tomorrow, I’m ending this, and I’m going to live my life without him in it.”
Just then, my phone started playing “Build God, Then We’ll Talk,” and I knew Christine was calling.
“Hey Chris,” I answered sorrowfully.
“Hey Joan,” she answered with the same amount of sorrow in her voice. “I just got off the phone with Ryan, and apparently they’re in town, but can’t see us at all. Do you know what’s up with that?”
“I have no idea what’s going on with that. But I do know that I’m ending it with Brendon tomorrow. I’m tired of putting up with this crap. I just want to be with my boyfriend, but I can’t because of the stupid band.”
“Oh, Joan. I totally know how you feel; I’m sick of it too. But are you sure you want to break up with him?”
“Positive. I’m sick of all this bullshit. If they’re in town, they could at least tell us to meet them somewhere, if even for five minutes, and I would be happy. But he can’t even give me that.”
Christine sighed on the other end of the phone. “Okay, just know I’m here for you. No matter what, I still love you.”
“Thanks Christine. Well, I’m going to go. I’ve got to get some stuff done and then I’m going to sleep so that I can be well rested for when I break my heart.”
“Don’t be too hard on yourself. If it’s what you need, then it’s what you need. You shouldn’t let Brendon control your life.”
“And you shouldn’t let Ryan control yours.”
“I don’t. Everything I have done is because I have wanted to do it. Ryan just pushed me to do the things I wanted to do. Now, you get some sleep and clear that head of yours.”
“I will. Night. I love you dear.”
“Night. Love you too darling.”
I closed my phone and collapsed face first onto my bed. I was dreading the day to come when I fell into a fitful sleep.
I woke up at about 2:30 a.m. according to the clock I was facing when I opened my eyes to a noise outside of my window. I sat up a bit to gain my bearings before turning my face towards the noise. I gasped and hid under my covers from the shock of seeing a hooded figure right outside my window, which is quite a feat as my room is on the second floor.
Slowly, I heard my window creak open and I burrowed myself farther into my covers wishing that this was all a dream. I heard the rustling of cloth and then felt my bed sink where the creeper had sat next to me. I then felt a hand run down my back as I froze and then I felt another pull back the covers from my head.
I was about to scream when I heard the soothing voice say, “Shh, you’ll only wake everyone else up and we won’t be able to be alone.” I knew that voice and when I turned my face to look at him, he smiled. “There you go, now I get to look at your beautiful face.”
“Get the hell away, Brendon,” I said with malice in my voice. His smile immediately turned into a frown. “I’m tired of all this bullshit. Get out.” I pointed back to the window in which he came in through.
Much to my dismay, he didn’t move to make his way back outside. He bent down and gave me a huge hug. “I’m sorry I’ve been such an asshole. I really never meant to be. But everything is really crazy right now.”
I pushed his arms off of me. “So crazy that you can’t even ask me to meet you somewhere, just so I can see you and be close to you. Hell, Brendon, I wouldn’t even care if we didn’t speak to each other, as long as we were in the same vicinity. But you don’t see that do you? Just go away. I’m through with feeling like crap because of you.” I turned my back on him and stared down my frog “Urie,” who is ironically named after the boy sitting next to me.
“Joan, look at me,” he pleaded as he rested his hand on my arm. I shook my head no and brushed his hand off of me. “Joan, come on. Please look at me,” I just shook my head again. “Fine, I guess I’ll just tell you with your back turned, because then you won’t be able to see that I’m not lying,” he said sarcastically.
I slowly turned around to face him. “Go, tell your excuse,” I said flatly.
He tried to take my hand in his, but I just pulled both hands away. He shrank back and started his story. “Fine, the only reason I’m even in town today was because I needed to ask someone a question in person and then plan something. That is why I couldn’t be with you today.”
I looked him straight in the eyes and told him, “That’s a crappy excuse. What did you have to ask and then plan?”
“That’s for me to know and you to find out,” Brendon said with a smile as he stood up and offered his hand to me. “Come with me.” After I shot him a glare, he added, “Please.”
I thought of my options for a bit and decided to go with him. I could give him that much. I allowed him to pull me up, and I put on my hoodie when he handed it to me.
He grabbed my hand again and pulled me to the window where a lift was resting so one could easily access my room. He wiggled his way out of the window and onto the lift before helping me do the same. He then lowered the lift and helped me out before scrambling off muttering, “Be right back,” and leaving me standing in my front yard. I started at the light snow beneath my feet and looked up only when I heard my name being called.
There Brendon stood in front of a horse drawn carriage. My mouth dropped open as he walked over to me and pulled me into the carriage with him. “Come on my little emo princess, your carriage awaits,” he hummed. It was a line he had written me in a song while in high school and from the day he wrote it I had always been his emo princess. And now he had gotten me the carriage to go along with the title.
Tears started to form in my eyes as I sat down, and I didn’t protest when Brendon put his arm around my shoulders.
The driver pulled away from the curb and started towards the park. “I am terribly sorry for not being here for you all the time, but you know the band is a huge part of my life.”
“But it is still no excuse for me to forget about my one and only true love. I really, really am sorry I’ve been neglecting you lately. My lack of sleep isn’t really an excuse, but it’s all I can give you. I wasn’t thinking straight at all. One night, I thought Ryan was a girl.” He lightly kissed my temple. “I’m so sorry. I love you so much. I just took you for granted. But I promise I will never do that again. You mean the world to me, and without you, I am nothing.”
“I love you too. And you are forgiven, just as long as it never happens again.”
“I promise it won’t. I love you.” He pulled me into a kiss, and I melted into his arms. This is just where I belonged – in the arms of my famously, stupid, idiot of a singer, boyfriend. I just wished I could stay in this moment forever, but he broke away and looked me in the eyes. He spoke those four words I had been waiting to hear for years from his lips: “Will you marry me?”
I pulled him into another passionate kiss before I even answered his question. When I pulled back, my smile was the largest I’ve ever worn, and I practically yelled, “Yes! Yes! Yes! Of course I’ll marry you!”
He pulled a ring out of his hoodie pocket and placed it on my ring finger before kissing me again. When we pulled back, I settled against him and we both looked down at my hand while he played with the ring on my finger. The smile would not leave my face.
It’s amazing how one little fight with Brendon can turn into the best moment of my life. Suddenly, I was hit with a thought, and I gasped.
“What?” Brendon asked.
“I’m going to have to share my husband with a bunch of teeny-boppers!”
Brendon laughed and pulled me closer to him. “You’ll never have to share me with anyone. I’m all yours. Yours and only yours. No one else could ever compare to you.”
Shivers ran down my back at his words and I reveled in the amazingness that my fiancé has about him. Even if he is the only twenty-two year old I know who wears Spongebob Square Pants pajamas.