The truth hurts worse
than anything I could bring myself
to do to you...
I've got all this ringing in my ears and none on my fingers - Fall Out Boy
My mind went blank and for a second I didn't feel anything at all. No shock, surprise, anger, fear... nothing. I simply stood staring at the man in front of me while Gerard muttered things under his breath and looked around angrily. I noticed how the small suns that lit the room seemed to strengthen their glow as a small vibration passed through the veins in my head.
"You're my... what?" I asked in disbelief, barely above a whisper, hoping that I had heard wrong.
Giving my shoulder another squeeze and smiling, he said, "Your father, boy. I am your real father."
The words finally registered in my mind. A wave of emotions hit me like a tidal wave, making my heart beat faster. I felt unbelievably stupid, staring at a man claiming to be my father when I knew the truth. I don't know why I stood there and listened to a word more of what he had to say... and yet something kept there. Glaring at him uncertainly, I removed his hand from my shoulder and took a step back. "My father died in a -"
"Car accident?" He finished, making me gape in shock and making me dislike him even more. A volcano seemed to boil inside of me, turning my gut into a burning pit. He turned around and took a few steps back towards the chairs, and then turned back to me. "Yes, that is what I made your mother believe. That and many other lies... necessary lies, but lies nonetheless."
"I've seen pictures of my father, and it's not you. I was a baby when he died and don't remember him but my mother wouldn't show me pictures of-"
Waving his hands around the room, Mr. D said, "Lies, Frank! All of them implanted by me into your mothers head. Your so called mothers head. I have mind powers, you see, I can manipulate peoples minds and make them think whatever I want."He stared at me with a half smirk on his face, as if waiting for a reaction, and getting it.
"Quit the bullshit! Speak clearly and tell me what the fuck you mean or I'm out of here!"The tiny vein that had begun throbbing in my head was increasing in force, slowly spreading an ache through my head and partially down the back of my neck. I was becoming certain that Mr. D really stood for Mr. Dickhead and not Delancy, as he had stated earlier.
Gerard noticed the stress on my face and urgently said to Stratton, "This is getting out of hand, he's going to lose control and the whole place is going to-"
"You're prettier with your mouth shut, Gerard," Delancy told him with a firm voice, silencing him with a deadly look. Gerard rolled his eyes and then covered them with a hand, trying to control his anger. I wondered why he took all this shit from this guy when I was about ready to kick his ass. The man with the long white beard exchanged a weary look with the old man sitting next to him but neither said a word.
"Frank..." Delancy continued, "Mary isn't your mother just like I'm not your father-"
Throwing my hands in the air in a questioning motion, I yelled, "But you just fucking said-"
"Don't yell at me, boy! I demand some respect! And if you would quit interrupting I could tell you what you need to know!"
I crossed my arms in front of me and nodded in defeat, still glaring at the man. What else could I do? I wanted this man to say what he had to say so I could get the hell out of there.
"You are one-of-a-kind, Frank. You have no mother... no father... no family whatsoever. Except for me. I am your creator."
I closed my eyes and rubbed my head. Nothing this man said made any sense. How could he say I had no parents, when I have so many memories of my childhood... toys, pictures, clothes... everything every normal family had, I had. I rubbed my temple softly, trying to ease away the increasing pressure that was accumulating there as Mr. Dickhead continued talking.
"I created you out of the ashes of powerful people that had been destroyed in the ever lasting battle against the ruins. People that gave their lives so that future generations could stand some chance against them and their leader. It is one of my powers, to create beings out of other already existing beings, but never again have I ever been able to create anyone even remotely as real and strong as you... and all of them end up dying within a few weeks... I used all the magical energy I had to create you just 2 years ago, on Halloween."
Ashes of dead people? Create human beings? Two years ago?
"This is unreal... you can't just go around creating human beings! It's just not possible... it's not..." The throbbing in my head was increasing by the second as I rubbed it in a futile attempt to make it stop. Looking at Gerard helplessly, I asked, "What is he talking about, Gee? He's lying, right? All of this is a lie... a joke... please tell me it's all just a bad dream."
The look on his face told me everything I needed to know. With his hands shoved deep into his pockets, he shook his head with his mouth open, not knowing what to say. But his eyes... his beautiful green eyes... were filled with terrible heartache at the impotence of not being able to do as I asked and make that nightmare disappear. I couldn't believe it... not even if Gee said it was all true.
I turned back suddenly to Delancy, my insides boiling with anger. "I am not some creation of yours. I remember my childhood, I had a childhood! I wasn't born two years ago; how would I have old pictures and all the shit I have up in the attic if I was made two years ago? Mary is my mother and my father died in a car crash!"
I suppose Delancy expected me to hear his story and then accept it all without so much as a questioning look, because he looked at me surprised, but then that surprise changed into an anger that matched mine.
"How can you reject the truth when it's staring you right in the face? I created you, I put all those memories in your head and in Mary's head, I placed all those toys and baby clothes in your attic, I had those pictures made, I did it all! I had to create false memories for you so you could have a normal life until it was time for you to enter the Underworld. I created fake report cards from school, a birth certificate, a fake x-ray from when you supposedly broke your arm when you were a kid - everything! I am the one that placed those tattoos all over your body you wear so proudly; all of them symbols of the past and future, words of hope, of guidance, words of importance!" While he yelled all of this, he walked up to me until he was towering over me. "I made you, you are /my/creation!"
I glared up at him, not at all intimidated by a man at least 6 feet tall and strongly built. My eyes and body filled with hatred with every passing second. Veins all over my head were throbbing violently, but I ignored the pain, too concentrated on the hatred I felt for a man I had just met. I wanted him to shut up... I wanted to break his jaw and make him shut up.
"I belong to no one," I said through my teeth as the ground began to tremble softly. "I'm not going to take another minute of this bullshit!"
"Frank..."Gerard warned, as the increasing tremble of the ground caused the elegant chairs to bounce around slightly, while Stratton Delancy and I glared at each other, oblivious to it all.
"Son," Mr. Dickhead, so well named, said grabbing me by the arm forcefully, "you need to face the-"
"Do not/call me son," I snarled, and then yelled, as I felt the familiar tension between my temples, "and do /not touch me!"
I grabbed my head as a sudden pulsation passed violently through my head, followed by a flash of incredible pain that left me blind for a few seconds.
"Control yourself, boy!" yelled Delancy, but it was too late. The ground was rumbling as the floor began to crack along with the high ceiling, making white dust fall to the ground.
Stratton Delancy stretched out a hand to touch me again, but I yelled "Don't!", sending him flying backwards with a surge of unintentional power. He crashed against his chair and fell to the ground, not moving a muscle after that. In that same moment, the ceiling began cracking and huge pieces of it starting falling to the ground. The two quiet elderly men got up from their chairs with an expression of fear on their wrinkled faces, as they slowly ran towards the door they had entered. Mikey simply stared at me, seeming oblivious to it all.
I glanced over at Gerard, tears filling my eyes in frustration and disbelief at all that Stratton had said and how my power had gotten out of control again. That man could be dead, and it's my fault! As much as I hated the guy, I wasn't a killer.
Not being able to handle the destruction I had caused, I turned and ran back the way we had entered, avoiding big pieces of ceiling as they continued to fall and crash on the floor. Running was hard because of the increasing tremble of the floor but I managed to reach the stairs, ignoring Gerard's pleads for me to wait for him.
I realized I didn't know the way back, but didn't care; I would just run until I found the exit of this hellhole. I had to go home and see my mother and make sure everything was alright. I just had to see her face... just her face would let me know everything was okay and that this was all just a lie.
As I ran through the dark and winding hallways, I suddenly felt as if I knew the way back for certain. Trusting my instinct, I turned when I felt I had to, and continued straight when I felt the same. When I finally reached the main doorway of the big stone building, I stopped dead in my tracks, surprised I had actually made it. It was as if an invisible hand had lead me all the way, disappearing once we reached the door. Wiping away tears from my face, I looked around and saw Aileen, Kat, Bob and Ray jump up from their seats at the table. They started yelling my name and asking what was wrong, what was the trembling, but I didn't have the strength to tell them all that had been said. Without a word, I started running again as their shouts of concerns and questions chased me down the hall.
I stopped at the door of the mausoleum and looked out, catching my breath. It was pouring like it hadn't in months. It suited my mood perfectly. I normally liked rain, but that was when I was at home and had nowhere to go. I flipped my hood over my head and continued my way home, running as fast as I could to get out of the rain sooner. The heavy wind blew leaves around my head and made plants and tree branches thrash at me violently as I passed them. I could see lighting bolts in the sky every once in a while, accompanied by a loud crack after a few seconds.
As I neared my house, an overwhelming sensation of doom grew inside of me. I felt as if someone was squeezing my insides and turning them to mush. I repeated to myself over and over again that everything would be fine once I got home... my mother would be waiting for me with a smile on her worn-out yet pretty face, and I could forget all the terrible lies that Delancy had said to me... and the whole Underworld community. Including Gerard. Especially Gerard. How could he stand there and let that asshole tell me all that bullshit, after saying a few hours earlier how much I supposedly meant to him? What kind of friend would put me through that? I felt horrible... I felt betrayed.
I slowed my pace a bit as my house came into view. I jumped up the two steps of the covered entrance and looked for the hidden key in its usual place; it wasn't there. Completely out of breath, I banged on the door impatiently, calling out to my mother.
I bent over to try and catch my breath. Hearing the door being opened, I shot back up straight and saw her standing there with an odd and almost frightened look on her face."May I... help you?"
I could practically hear the sound of my world crashing down around me. All my hopes dropped to the ground as I looked into her face. She didn't know who I was."Mom, it's me! It's Frank!"
Closing the door a bit more and frowning at the name, she said, "I'm sorry, you must be confusing me with someone else... tell me your mothers name, maybe I know her."She looked me up and down, concerned and cautious at the same time.
I took a step forward trying to get into the house, but she closed the door a bit more, alarmed at my quick movements. Pulling the hood off my head, I exclaimed, "Mom, please! It's me! I'm sorry I didn't come home last night or the night before, but I'm here now!"
She shook her head, looking sad. "I'm sorry, but..."
"Don't you remember me? My room is upstairs on the left, I love the Misfits, I have posters of them all over the walls! My birthday is on Halloween... I just turned 17!"
She looked at me confused as her eyes filled with tears. Her confusion was quickly replaced with another emotion: anger. "I don't know who you are, or how you know any of that, but I want you to leave now."
I wouldn't have been more shocked if she had ripped her head off to show a green-faced alien under it. "What...? Mom, I know all of that because I'm Frank! I-"
"My son Frank died last year!" She yelled as tears flowed down her face, opening the door suddenly to look me square in the eye. "How can you come here, pretending to be him to his own mother? Do you know how much I've suffered because of his death!?"
I gaped at her. Died... last year? It was all too unbelievable to take in. Pushing past her through the door and ignoring her surprised shouts, I ran up to my room to find everything just the way I had left it, except for a picture on the nightstand. I walked over to it and picked it up; it was a black and white picture of atombstone surrounded with beautiful flowers. It read:
Frank Anthony Iero Jr.
Beloved son and savior to those that knew him
We will always remember and love you
I placed the picture back on the nightstand and looked around in panicky disbelief... it couldn't be true. I saw pictures of the supposed dead Frank on the walls and it wasn't me... it wasn't my face! Everything in the room was mine, the facts, the name, the birthday, everything... and yet the person in the pictures wasn't me. I stared at the boy with black hair and an eyebrow piercing as I suddenly felt short of breath. Who was the stranger in the picture if all of this, this /life/was mine? I didn't understand anything, except for the fact I had to get out of there.
"Please..." said a weak voice from the doorway, "please leave... don't make me go through all this pain again."
My tears flooded with tears as I saw the look of deep distress on her face. I rushed past her towards the main door, slamming it shut behind me. I dragged my feet down the two wet front door steps where I finally dropped down to my knees and hands in despair, making a slapping sound as I hit the soaked cement. I placed my head on my legs as I sobbed, not knowing what to do or where to go as the rain pounded hard on my back. The life I had known was over... my own mother didn't recognize me. The sonofabitch Mr. Dickhead was right after all... nothing about my so called life was real. Even I was a fake. I slammed my fists against the ground as I cursed the entire world for making me exist, just as a loud crack of thunder sounded.
"Frank..." said a gentle voice as I heard someone walk up to where I was and drop to the ground next to me, his voice full of regret. "I'm so sorry, Frankie, I... wish I could fix everything and make it all better..." He placed a hand on my back but I shrugged my shoulders angrily to get it off.
"Don't," I warned, glaring at him through tears and soaked bangs. "Why didn't you tell me it was all a lie, Gerard, if you knew it? My whole fucking life is a movie! A script was written and given to the actors, and I was one of them without even knowing it! Nothing I knew exists... even I don't..." I finished, dropping my head back to my legs again as hot tears overflowed my eyes again, disguised by the drops of rain.
"I didn't want to hurt you, Frankie... I just couldn't tell you, it's not an easy thing to tell someone, especially someone you give a fuck about..." he said with his voice cracking, wiping his clinging hair from his face and glancing up at the relentless sky.
"Yeah, well you sure show that very well!" I looked around helplessly... I hated that feeling. "I'm not who I thought I was, my own mother doesn't know who the fuck I am... I don't know what to do... I probably killed that guy down there, on top of everything else... and my fucking head won't stop throbbing!" I yelled, clenching it, making my vision blur and sending a loud vibration through the ground. I wanted the rain to come down faster and harder; I wanted it to drown me and end it all right then.
Gerard put his arms around me; I tried to push him away, but he insisted and I ended up giving up and letting him hold me. I sobbed into his already soaked arm, letting out everything I had welled up inside of me. He rocked me gently as if I were a child that had lost his favorite toy, when I had in fact lost the person I most cared about and the world as I knew it.
Awww, Frankie-boy loves his momma. Well his fake momma. You understand me.
Everything happens to poor Frankie... or does it? Gerard has his own serious problems to deal with... problems that are only going to get worse before they get better; if they do get better.
Review and rate. Every time you do a fairy comes back to life. Oh, come on, haven't you seen Peter Pan?!
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