a song fic based on Heaven Help Us sort of random... but I quite like it
This old hotel where she squanders time, living without being, breathing without feeling. Sometimes she sleeps, sometimes she dreams, she hardly knows the difference anymore. She is sprawled out on the gates of eternity, spitting out the blood that poisons her veins. But her time has not yet come. Some part of her is still waiting, expecting him to come and take her away from this hell, but she knows he never will.
Some pray for her, knowing parts of the truth. Most worship her, taking her as their goddess. All pick her apart, using her, turning her into something she’s not. The shrapnel wounds have cut too deep; such petty things cannot hurt her. Yet still she is doused in gasoline, a single flame enough to set her alight, to send her spinning into emptiness. And they think she is flawless? What a perfect punch line.
They don’t know a thing about her sins, the misery and pain she must endure. They don’t see her burning up, consumed by her regrets. Her heart was left an open wound, her soul broken into a thousand shattering fragments. She is nothing beyond her anguish, her suffering makes her real. But soon her weak fire will extinguish and she will fade to black. Only heaven can help her now.