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Categories > Original > Romance

Ongaku

Suzume is a girl like none other. Her perception of the world revolves around music or otherwise nonchalant sounds. With the constant problem of men attacking and/or raping her and falling in love ...

Category: Romance - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Angst,Drama,Romance - Characters:  - Warnings: [V] - Published: 2008/04/15 - Updated: 2008/04/16 - 1161 words

Reviews

• Ongaku

  (#) XxkyorocksxX 2008-04-15 09:35:47 PM

  That was pretty^^ r u refering to me when you say frind? YAY!!

• Ongaku

  (#) XxkyorocksxX 2008-04-15 09:36:46 PM

  PRETTY!!! I lubed it!>w<
  were you refering to me when you said friend??? huh?
  lol

  Author's response

  Yes, lmao, I was referring to you. Thanks by the way. ^_^ Yeah....and no need to review twice. (Although I assume that was a mistake)
  -is happy-

• Ongaku

  (#) MarkPoa 2008-05-19 03:36:57 AM

  The writing is fairly good and I think the use of music or instruments as descriptions is fairly unique.
  
  I do think you need to work on the pacing a little bit better. The ambiance was pretty good and evoked a moody feel, but the sentences (especially the long ones) made the story feel rushed. I thought it had a bad effect overall and removed some of the somberness of the piece.
  
  I do look forward to more of this.

  Author's response

  Wow, I never thought of that. Thanks.
  
  I think I see what you mean. I'm really weak at that sort of thing, so I don't know, but I'll put that comment into consideration.
  
  Thank you for reviewing.

• Ongaku

  (#) BlackAngelChick 2008-06-11 01:08:30 AM

  Ooohhh, I like it. Very original.

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