Not too sure where this came from.. Hope y'all like it. :D
"So… What are we going to do tonight?" I asked; it was only about 11pm, but the club was closed for some reason that escaped my mind.
"I was thinking about a late dinner and maybe a movie night back at yours." He replied, and punctuated his sentence with another kiss.
"Hmm. Seems to me all the movie nights are at my house. Are you using me for my plasma screen and kick ass stereo system?" I laughed.
"You know it, since I have the same exact one back in Chicago."
"Oh, you really know how to make a girl feel special."
"That's what I do. Now, why don't we head out to some Italian food?" he asked.
"Alright, Italian it is." I smirked, and kissed him again. This could be the last time. He's engaged… but this was ours long before, I mentally rationed in my head.
"I'll take the fettuccine with creamy pesto sauce. Oh and can I get grilled chicken with that?" I asked, grinning up at the waiter.
"But of course, ma'am. And for you sir?"
"How about… Some regular spaghetti?" he shrugged.
"Can do. And would you two like anything to drink? The manager said the best wine is on the house." The waiter stated.
"Actually, we don't drink. But I'll take a regular Coke." He replied.
"And I'll have one too." I smiled.
"So, how long are we going to do this Pete? Cause I don't know how long we can take this." I asked.
"You know that I still love you. Maybe as much or even more than her, babe." He sighed.
"Yah, but at the end of the day, she comes off as yours, and me a little helpless whore." I scoffed.
"You're not a whore. And you should know better than that."
"Well then, when you were interviewed and a question came up about me, why didn't you correct Ashlee when she came out and said I was a whore? If you had any love for me, you would have fixed that."
"I didn't want to anger her. I can't let this marriage collapse." He sighed.
"But you're willing to drag your best friend through mud and shit? Really, I doubt your love." I hissed.
"Calm down babe. It's all going to be all right. Don't worry." Pete replied.
"And here's your pesto, and spaghetti. Would you two like anything else?" the waiter asked.
"I'll take more bread. And how about a bottle of your finest wine." I hissed.
"That'll be a negative. We'll take some more bread and refills, please." Pete countered.
"Peter! Don't override me like that." I hissed once the waiter left.
"You're being completely irrational." He calmly retorted.
"Irrational? Peter you didn't even stick up for me! I'm your best friend, and you can't even stick up for me." I felt the tears threatening to overflow. "I can't take this anymore. You can come over some other time. I need to be left alone." I sighed, as I walked away from the man I thought I had loved.
"I don't know what to do, Lan." I cried into my friends shoulder.
"Honey, you need to tell him what the problem is. Tell him you love him." He suggested.
"But baby, I already did. And he said he loved me back, but she's in the way. All she was supposed to be was a publicity stunt." I cried. "But I think she's become my replacement." I broke down into his arms.
"Shh, why do you say that?"
"Landon, she's the one wearing the ring in the end of the day; we've been together longer, but she's the one." I moaned.
"This will blow over quickly sugar, don't cry. Everything will turn out the right way."
"Did you hear what she called me? Did you hear what she called me, and he didn't correct it?" I sniffled, and Landon shook his head, "She called me a 'cheap whore' when Pete was asked about me. He didn't even correct her; he didn't say 'I was his friend'; I could have handled that. But calling me his whore? Never."
"That was low of him." Landon replied, and continued to rub my back. "Here, why don't you go start up the bathtub, and I'll heat you up some tea. After a nice soak, we can put on a movie, and then fall asleep while eating Ben and Jerry's. Does that sound good to you?"
"Yes." I sniffled, as I wiped my nose off onto my sleeve. "Oh, Lan, I'm sorry for getting your shirt all slimy." I pouted.
"It's alright. You're the one who does laundry anyways." He shrugged. "Can I add that it's a good thing you don't do this breaking up/boyfriend fuck-up thing a lot; because I'd be fat. And I can't handle that." He grimaced.
"I couldn't let you get fat. Plus if we did this more often, we'd have either fat-free ice cream, or something fruity and healthy." I laughed, "don't worry, I'd take care of our shapes."
"Now go and get ready. I don't need to walk in on you while you are still heating up the tub." He laughed and shuddered.
"Yah well, I still have nightmares about walking in on you in the shower. I'm not sure if it was the pink shower cap, the nakedness, or the singing that did me in…" I thought.
"Go!" he laughed, and pushed me to the bathroom.
"I can't believe how innocent Edward is. It's so adorable." I sighed, and placed another scoopful of some tropical sherbet into my mouth.
"You have a point. But I'm pretty sure that's how Burton planned it." Landon added with a laugh.
"Whatever. The doorbell just rang; you gonna answer it?" I asked, adding in puppy-dog eyes to add to my appeal.
"Fine. But, next time, you get it." He sighed.
"Nice PJS!!!" I yelled out, seeing his cowboy pajama bottoms and space men top. I bought them for him about a year or two after our high school graduation; it's amazing he still fits them.
"Hey, is she in there?" the guy at the door asked.
"This is her apartment." Landon sneered.
"She could be anywhere. Is she there? Cause if she isn't I'll just leave a note and be on my way."
"She's here, but I can't guarantee she'll talk to you. You hurt her." Landon sighed, and opened the door wider so the guest could enter. "Mi amor, you have a guest."
"Send it in." I replied from my spot on the couch. Minutes later he entered the room. "Landon. I see no guest here. Why is this person in here?" I seethed.
"Come on, Pixie, we have to talk about this." He sighed.
"I'm gonna head in early tonight. Babe, let me know if you need anything." Landon stated, before placing a kiss on my forehead and leaving the room.
"Night Landon." I replied the same time as he did. "You came to talk, so you start."
He opened his mouth to begin, but I quickly spoke over him, "Wait no. You should hear this hilarious thing I heard about on the Internet. This whore just got engaged to this really sweet guy, and it turns out he fucked her and got her pregnant. Really now Peter, I though shotgun weddings were below you." I chided. "But I guess when you break down to dating whores, two at once, you can't really go lower than that."
"Don't call her a whore." He hissed back."Oh so you'll protect her from that word, but not me." I laughed.
"You know I think maybe she's right." Pete stated barely above a whisper.
"You see Peter, there's a big problem with that statement. You see, we've been dating since... Let's see, high school. Before you were the shit, before Clandestine, Angels and Kings, hell even before Fall Out Boy. And not once did I do anything that would even connect me to being a whore; until you made me the other woman. It's all you." I growled.
"You knew what happened, I'm with Ashlee to appease the company." He sighed, knowing he had lost that battle.
"Why was I not good enough? Why would you have to have a money hungry bitch to replace me?" I cried out.
"I don't know." He whispered.
"This gone past where I can forgive you, because I don't think I ever can, Peter. You got her pregnant; she's now forever bonded to you. I can't be with you when you're with her now. I'm done." I cried, "Now go." I added pointing to the door.
"But Pixie, please baby, we can make this. We can make it through this." He was crying now as well, and holding my hand, trying to capture my eyes with his.
"No Pete. I can't. I won't. Move on with your life, and I'll move on with mine." I wrenched my hand away."What are you going to do?" he asked.
"I'm going to move away; away from here to keep you two out of my mind. Chicago, Los Angeles, New York; they are all tainted now. I can't watch TV, or read my magazines without seeing you both in them. So I'm moving." I sighed.
"You're really ending this then?" he sniffled.
"Yes. And nothing you do can stop me. Nor can anyone from Fall Out Boy. And don't you even dare to think of sending Dirty to stop me. I don't want this." I resolved.
"Well then. I guess I'll leave if you're set." He sniffled again.
"I am. Now go Peter." I paused, standing by the open door.
"I wish this wouldn't have to end."
"If this had happened some other way, it would have stayed strong; but it didn't." I replied and shut the door as soon as he left. I felt the pressure from him as he collapsed against the door. I lowered myself to the ground, and placed my hand over where he was on the other side of the door, "goodbye my Panda." I whispered, and kissed the door.
Five months later
Not supposed to fly in the later part of your pregnancy.
"You going to be ok?" Landon asked.
"Yes I'll be fine. You know where I'll be, and you have my new number. I'll call you when the plane lands, and the guys come and get me." I cried into his ears.
"I just wish you didn't have to leave." Landon cried.
"I know, but I wouldn't be able to stand seeing him with her everywhere. Maybe one day, I'll move back here. Go to a concert of theirs, but not now. Not for a while." I smiled, with tears running down my cheeks.
"Flight 3551 to Helsinki Finland is now open for boarding. Boarding is available to those with first class tickets or for those with children under four or disabilities in coach."
"That's you." Landon stated.
"Yah." I smiled, as the tears slid down my cheeks. I leaned over to pick up Lilith from her stroller and placed her on my hip. "Give your niece a kiss." I smiled, and he placed a kiss on both of our heads.
"Good luck." Landon smiled, and waved goodbye.
"Hello Ma'am, where will you be seated?" the flight attendant asked.
"I believe 2B." I smiled handing her the ticket.
"You may board now." She smiled.
I heard my name being called out from the distance, so I stopped and looked back. And there he was; tears in his eyes. But I was on my way; and never looking back again. Plus if he really wanted to know, Landon would tell him. Everything.
My phone chimed one last time before I closed it down, and featured the famous digits I had memorized. "She's beautiful." I quickly wrote back, "She was yours, and sweetie, you had me. However, now you lost us both."
Can't find my way home,
but it's through you and I know
what I'd do just to get back in her arms.
My Chemical Romance
…My Way Home is Through You…