Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > And I'd Give Up Forever To Touch You...
Chapter 1.
0 reviewsMy First rydon fiction, it starts off with brendon loving ryan but not wanting to, things unfold... you shall just have to read to find out! :P
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Brednons POV.
"why do you care so much what they do?" Audrey questioned me. "because Ryan is my bestfriend, i dont want to see
him get hurt". I lied, that wasn't the reason. I'm not actually very sure of the reason. I'm not sure of my feelings toward Ryan,
sometimes they're normal, sometimes they're not. I just get so jealous when he is with Keltie, i can't stand to be around them!
"sometimes i think you pay more attention to him than me!" and that fired me up. Something she had said had triggered
something, and anger rushed in the direction of my mouth. "MAYBE I DO! I DON'T LOVE YOU! I NEVER DID, AND I NEVER WOULD!
WE'RE OVER!" i yelled at her. I was so frightened and shocked at what had just happened. I looked her in the eye, to try and predict her first move, but i wasn't sure what she would do. Her eyes were full of anger and hurt, i had no idea what was going to happen. Then out of nowhere, she slaps me! "NEVER SPEAK TO ME AGAIN YOU TWO-FACED BITCH!" she yells at me, then whips around and storms out of the room furiously. And i dont blame her, after what i just said! I would of done alot more than slap someone if they said that to me. Then the shock was replaced by sadness. I slowly walked and sat on the window sill. What will Ryan think of me now? Will he be angry? shocked? upset? I couldn't tell, you could never tell with Ryan, he is soo unpredictable. I guess thats one of the reasons i like him soo much. But it isn't just a crush. I'm beginning to see now, why i feel these things. I love him, and that was wrong. I shouldn't of fallen for him. He is my best friend and my feelings could ruin everything that we have. And not being near him at all, i.. i would rather die. But he doesn't love me. He never will. He is completely straight, im 100% sure of it. But i can't not tell anyone, or i will explode! What about Jon? Spencer? how on EARTH would they handle something like that! Why do i feel this way about him!? I hate it! he doesnt love me! I could feel my eyes burning with tears, so i wiped them away. I looked out the window, trying to distract myself from my thoughts, but instead i saw Ryan and Keltie, sitting together on a park bench. I felt a rush of jealousy and anger. Suddenly, Ry looked up at me. I forced what i thought would be a convincing smile, but it mustn't of worked, because he gave me a questioning look. Before he could do anything, i stood up and walked from the room. Tears streaming down my face.
Ryans POV.
As i sat, twirling my fingers through Kelties soft hair, i couldn't help but think about Brendon. Somethings up. And i'm determined to find out what it is. Something about his personality has changed. Its been like that for a while, but lately its gotten worse. But everytime i try to confront him, he just waves it off and changes the subject. I was thinking of going to find him, getting it over with once and for all, when my thoughts were interupted by a loud bang of the front door. I sat up a little straighter to see who it was. And a distraught looking Audrey walked furiously down the pathway. I didn't exactly want to go near her at this point in time, so i asked Keltie to go and talk to her, while i speak with Bren. I was halfway down the hall when i heard muffled sobs coming from the door on my right. The Bathroom. I took a deep breath and pushed open the door. And there sat my best friend, on the floor with his head in his hands, crying his heart out. His body shook with every breath he took. "Ry-Ryan?" he looked up. "Oh no. I dont want you to see me like this!" he said, he sounded so sad and scared. I sat down on the floor next to him and put my arm around his shoulder. Which for some reason, made him cry even harder. "come on bren, whats up?" i asked, in what i hoped was a soothing voice. His body still shook harder with every silent sob. "I- I cant" he stuttered. "come on! of course you can! you can tell me anything brenny. anything" I encouraged him to talk. "come on. i will always be there. no matter what!" i gve him a squeeze. Suddenly he looked at me with eyes full of tears, and i couldn't help but notice they were the perfect shade of brown. He stopped crying and said "im sorry Ryan. This is something i really cant share with you right now." and he stood up and walked out. Leaving me on the bathroom floor. Wondering. Wondering what was going on with him. Why he is soo upset. Also wondering, what had happened to me.
"why do you care so much what they do?" Audrey questioned me. "because Ryan is my bestfriend, i dont want to see
him get hurt". I lied, that wasn't the reason. I'm not actually very sure of the reason. I'm not sure of my feelings toward Ryan,
sometimes they're normal, sometimes they're not. I just get so jealous when he is with Keltie, i can't stand to be around them!
"sometimes i think you pay more attention to him than me!" and that fired me up. Something she had said had triggered
something, and anger rushed in the direction of my mouth. "MAYBE I DO! I DON'T LOVE YOU! I NEVER DID, AND I NEVER WOULD!
WE'RE OVER!" i yelled at her. I was so frightened and shocked at what had just happened. I looked her in the eye, to try and predict her first move, but i wasn't sure what she would do. Her eyes were full of anger and hurt, i had no idea what was going to happen. Then out of nowhere, she slaps me! "NEVER SPEAK TO ME AGAIN YOU TWO-FACED BITCH!" she yells at me, then whips around and storms out of the room furiously. And i dont blame her, after what i just said! I would of done alot more than slap someone if they said that to me. Then the shock was replaced by sadness. I slowly walked and sat on the window sill. What will Ryan think of me now? Will he be angry? shocked? upset? I couldn't tell, you could never tell with Ryan, he is soo unpredictable. I guess thats one of the reasons i like him soo much. But it isn't just a crush. I'm beginning to see now, why i feel these things. I love him, and that was wrong. I shouldn't of fallen for him. He is my best friend and my feelings could ruin everything that we have. And not being near him at all, i.. i would rather die. But he doesn't love me. He never will. He is completely straight, im 100% sure of it. But i can't not tell anyone, or i will explode! What about Jon? Spencer? how on EARTH would they handle something like that! Why do i feel this way about him!? I hate it! he doesnt love me! I could feel my eyes burning with tears, so i wiped them away. I looked out the window, trying to distract myself from my thoughts, but instead i saw Ryan and Keltie, sitting together on a park bench. I felt a rush of jealousy and anger. Suddenly, Ry looked up at me. I forced what i thought would be a convincing smile, but it mustn't of worked, because he gave me a questioning look. Before he could do anything, i stood up and walked from the room. Tears streaming down my face.
Ryans POV.
As i sat, twirling my fingers through Kelties soft hair, i couldn't help but think about Brendon. Somethings up. And i'm determined to find out what it is. Something about his personality has changed. Its been like that for a while, but lately its gotten worse. But everytime i try to confront him, he just waves it off and changes the subject. I was thinking of going to find him, getting it over with once and for all, when my thoughts were interupted by a loud bang of the front door. I sat up a little straighter to see who it was. And a distraught looking Audrey walked furiously down the pathway. I didn't exactly want to go near her at this point in time, so i asked Keltie to go and talk to her, while i speak with Bren. I was halfway down the hall when i heard muffled sobs coming from the door on my right. The Bathroom. I took a deep breath and pushed open the door. And there sat my best friend, on the floor with his head in his hands, crying his heart out. His body shook with every breath he took. "Ry-Ryan?" he looked up. "Oh no. I dont want you to see me like this!" he said, he sounded so sad and scared. I sat down on the floor next to him and put my arm around his shoulder. Which for some reason, made him cry even harder. "come on bren, whats up?" i asked, in what i hoped was a soothing voice. His body still shook harder with every silent sob. "I- I cant" he stuttered. "come on! of course you can! you can tell me anything brenny. anything" I encouraged him to talk. "come on. i will always be there. no matter what!" i gve him a squeeze. Suddenly he looked at me with eyes full of tears, and i couldn't help but notice they were the perfect shade of brown. He stopped crying and said "im sorry Ryan. This is something i really cant share with you right now." and he stood up and walked out. Leaving me on the bathroom floor. Wondering. Wondering what was going on with him. Why he is soo upset. Also wondering, what had happened to me.
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