Categories > Anime/Manga > Naruto > To Kill The Pain
One Can Let Pain Fly Away
Free-falling from the Hokage mountain sounded like a really good idea at the time...
?Blocked
This is a book of firsts. Firsts, and lasts, and middles, and everything else too. But, this is not a book that ends. This is not a book of ends or endings or anything of that nature. It is also not about beginnings- in fact, this book never begins! The truth in a story lies in the fact that a story’s beginning starts with the conception of that universe and a story’s ending does not denote the end of that world. This book does not breathe, but in your mind, the characters will. They exist, as surely as you do. If only you had the will to explore, their story will unfold in thousands of dimensions every second with every minute shift of thought. When you put this book down and think about the characters, you bring them to life. You become the god of the story.
You hold the power.
Use it wisely.
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“Do you want me?” Itachi asked, his back towards Kakashi, as he stripped off his shirt. Kakashi nodded slightly and responded. The answer was like tumblers in a lock. The wrong answer and Itachi would leave. The slightest variable would have Itachi turn and give him that look, and he would leave Kakashi feeling like a chastised puppy.
“I want you like I’ve never wanted anyone else.” It was a touch of ego stroking that Kakashi did not mind. With how hard he had worked to find the right answer, the words did not matter overmuch. Itachi deserved the ego stroking response, and lies were easier than the truth anyway. He had wanted others more- one other in particular, but Itachi was worth it.
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“What you’re talking about, Kakashi, is opportunity cost,” Obito says, proud to have remembered the economics lesson from the Academy. The Academy seems so long ago, to all of them, though Kakashi was a chunin before they even entered the Academy. He never brings this up, and neither do they. “Anyway though…. Kakashi, I don’t think that’s the real question,” Obito says finally. “The cost is only everything we could have been.” Obito shook his brown hair out of his eyes and looked- really looked at Kakashi: in one of his rare serious moments. “I think the question you really want to ask-”
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“Do you need me?” Itachi asked, his fingertips skimming under the waistband of Kakashi’s pants, his head down, face blocked from view by that long ass hair of his as he undid Kakashi's pants. The light touches drove Kakashi to distraction, as always. His partner was a sadist, it was often said. Kakashi very nearly stammered. Only the fear of Itachi leaving kept his baser instincts from taking over.
“I need you more than the air I breathe.” This line Kakashi had paid very dearly for. Blood, sweat, and tears, and it was worth every drop to get Itachi to stay. Kakashi only feared one thing, and that was to be alone. Itachi was his teammate, and this made their teamwork seamless. Each motion corresponded to an emotion to a reaction that would have them moving in perfect sync without words. And sometimes Itachi felt whimsical.
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Jiraya stared down at his ink-stained hands and smiled. He had finally finished the foreword for his epic book and it was perfect. He sighed in contentment.
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The death of the child was never directly linked to that of her parents. In the record books, the hypothesis ran as follows:
8:14:05. An unknown assailant kills Saki and Yamcha in the dressing room. The eldest daughter Mayuri escapes the assailant.
8:30.24. Megumi finishes his set and is killed by an unknown perpetrator, presumed Shinobi, also presumed to be the killer of Saki and the youngest child.
9:47:42. a villager spots Mayuri running into the woods. No one is observed following her.
10:24:05. Presumed time of death for Mayuri. Victim’s body is viciously attacked and cleaved nearly in two. Body bears marks similar to that of rape, but investigation does not find seminal fluids or foreign particulates. Due to the violent and contradictory nature of the assault, it can only be assumed that a second assailant attacked the girl once she had escaped the first.
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“Do you love me?” Itachi asked, pulling his lips away for a moment to ask. This answer had taken Kakashi longest to earn. He closed his eyes against the distracting sensation of Itachi’s lips returning to his cock, but it only intensified the feeling and he jerked his eyes open, as always. Itachi swallowed him down all the way, as Kakashi opened his mouth to speak. He let out a breath of air, trying to calm himself. If he stammered, Itachi would leave.
“I love you more than anything in this world.” Itachi’s smile/smirk as his lips released Kakashi’s cock was a temptation onto itself. Itachi stood and allowed Kakashi to strip him. Sometimes Kakashi wondered what this meant to Itachi. Sometimes he hated the sound of moans. Sometimes he loved them. Kakashi tried to avoid making any kind of noise until Itachi had. Sometimes Itachi rewarded him for his patience.
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Sasuke slept, curled into the warmth Naruto provided. Sakura curled against him, though she lay awake. The night was cold and the ground was rough. Thus, in Kakashi’s mind, both time and place were perfect for camping. Sakura huddled against Sasuke a little more under the blanket and in sleep, his arms tightened around her. A few weeks ago, she would have been elated at how near she was to Sasuke, but now she had mixed feelings on the issue. He shifted a little, and Sakura tried to shift away, not wanting to wake him, but only managed to turn around in his grasp. She looked at both her teammates to distract herself from his nearness. Naruto’s face buried in Sasuke’s back as though he were a human space heater, one arm around his chest, the other one lower down, around his waist. Sakura tried hard not to think about what she had seen, but it was difficult. Her mind clicked off almost completely when Sasuke pulled her close again in his sleep. Sakura’s eyes closed and she drank in the delicious warmth emanating from the two of them. Sakura sighed, cuddling into Sasuke to get as much warmth as she could, wishing the next day would come soon.
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“Do you love me?” it is Kakashi’s turn to ask. He had not learned this one for a long while. Itachi’s answers were always different, to every question besides this one. Itachi liked when Kakashi bit his nipples and Kakashi did, through the ever-present cloth on his face. The nine-year age gap between them did not really affect them, but it did make them keep things secret. Not that Kakashi wanted anyone to know of this, in any case.
“I’m in love with my lust.” Itachi responded, letting out a soft sigh when clothed teeth grazed sensitized nipples. His head fell back when those same teeth set to his neck. “We’ll turn angel wings to dust.” Itachi allowed him to caress his bare ass, bites returned. “Our breaths are heated sighs.” His hand wrapped around the base of Itachi’s cock, stroking it slowly. “They take us far across the skies.”
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And when Naruto’s eyes fill with tears he tries so hard not to shed, when Sakura cries so hard her body shakes, when Tazuna realizes how hard the life of a Shinobi is for the young ones- even for the old ones, Kakashi is nearly paralyzed. Not because he had thought- he would never admit to himself that he thought this team would outlive him, Kakashi would live forever that his student was dead. Not because he had no words to give to help grief pass. When Naruto realizes for the first time- when Naruto realizes Wow, death is real… for the first time, Kakashi is not able to help him through it.
If the pseudo-death had belonged to Naruto, had it been Naruto who ‘died’, Kakashi would have consoled the other two and would have taught them that lesson quickly. Nevertheless, Kakashi cannot teach Naruto about death. Naruto’s birth killed his mother- and somewhere Kakashi is glad that childbirth killed that damn bitch, she did not deserve to live anyway- and his life killed his father, the father Kakashi knew and Naruto never met. When Sasuke miraculously returns to the land of the living, none there is more relieved than Kakashi.
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“Do you need me?” Kakashi asked, and here the answers varied. Sometimes Kakashi wondered what would happen if he just left like Itachi, but he knows he does not have the power. If he were to just leave, then he would never have another chance. After all, Itachi does not need this as Kakashi does.
“Only to watch my back and provide my pleasure.” The touches became rougher. Kakashi found himself up against the wall and he reversed them. Itachi’s soft moan when his back hit the wall was pure eroticism. Kakashi grabbed a tube of lubrication from the dresser next to them.
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It was a swift thrust to the throat, with a blade sharp enough to split hairs, thin enough so any cut received would seal almost instantly. It was a blade reserved only for ANBU, or for the elite, reserved for missions requiring torture.
His father’s blade pierced the girl’s throat, ended her screams. He stripped her of clothes as she sobbed, and when she struck out at him, he very deliberately broke two of her fingers. He shoved two fingers in her mouth, two fingers down her throat, the same number of fingers he had broken. She whimpered uncomprehendingly. His fingers entered her roughly, and if she had the ability to, she would have screamed. What came out was a sound like strangling a cat underwater. Blood covered his fingers from his breaking her hymen and he shoved his fingers in deeper, using them to fuck her ruthlessly. Her back pressed against the bark of the tree. The roughness of it tore open the skin on her back and made more blood. His left arm pressed her harder against the tree.
The fingers go back in her mouth, gagging her on the taste of her own blood.
The sword enters through her stomach, up through the diaphragm, bisecting the bronchial tubes. The eyes of the killer are cold, hard, ruthless, yet somehow darkly amused- pleased. Hands with broken fingers and torn off fingernails scrabble at the hilt of the sword. He smiles at her sweetly, and for a moment- a moment as precious and fleeting as a heartbeat, she does not feel pain, so entranced she is with the handsome boy’s smile. His lips find her in a sweet gentle kiss. A malicious wrench of the blade twists the blade within her and she makes a sound- a sound like betrayal, but didn’t she know that he was going to kill her? Didn’t she know what it meant to have a sword in her stomach? How can she sound so betrayed if he stabbed her before he kissed her? The murderer wonders to himself. as it aligns with her spine. A jerk of the blade has her on her feet. It sliced through her sternum with uncanny ease. The sound of flesh splitting, and bones breaking/cracking/shearing apart follows closely, [but not too close, perhaps a full .03 nanoseconds after] the flash of steel as it rockets up, over and back down.
The source of the pivot was the exact center of the skull. The tip of the blade swiveled at that very spot, and then continued with no loss of momentum on its downward path, truly now bisecting the spine, perfectly down to the pelvis, where the blade simply stops. The corpse falls to the ground with a dull, sickening thud. Its blood was everywhere.
To the assailant, the body no longer has gender. It is simply a body. A corpse with no name, no face, and no importance, except it is the first person that he has ever mutilated, the first mission that he had ever been required to kill someone on, his fourth kill in one day.
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Kakashi looked down at his blood soaked hands and wondered if he would be able to meet his sensei‘s eyes the next day.
He does not flinch away from meeting that blue gaze, but Minato can sense the change, feel the blood on his student’s hands, and inwardly, he grieves.
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“Do you want me?” Kakashi stalled the question for a while, having had teased the Uchiha with his fingertips, touching the entrance lightly, stroking his testes with one finger until the slowness threatened to destroy him. Itachi loved it rough, and the light touches tormented him more than it tormented Kakashi.
“Yes!” Itachi gasps out. There is no preamble, no lyrical dissension or delaying tactic as with his other answers. There is only want, a want Kakashi is willing to fulfill. There is only need. There is only the pressing need for roughness, pain, to fuck, and be fucked. It is nothing more. That is why Kakashi shoves two fingers in now, with no hesitation.
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Itachi Knows.
He knows, and it’s so twisted that he’s just so [yes, he’s twisted, so twisted, everything is so fucking twisted, and he is no exception- fucked up, crazy, twisted like everything, everything is so fucking twisted and fucked up and over and sideways and upside down it makes you want to scream- go on, scream in this madness. Scream, my lovely, but no one will hear you. No one cares. Not in this twisted fucking world. Twisted like everything] so twisted, that he does not just not care, he likes it.
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Sakura’s face stung with the force of the slap, her head turned away, and her eyes became cloudy with tears. Naruto stared at his hand in [horror, you would think, since he just slapped his teammate, but no, he stares in] something akin to disgust.
“I don’t have a boyfriend.” He said, his voice empty, frighteningly so. Sakura has never heard Naruto sound so empty before this. He looked up at her, and she was afraid to speak, her mouth gaping open like a dead clam, the tongue meat no longer useful. “Don’t come to my house again.” The empty rings of defensiveness, something he feels like he needs to hide. The old man of the ramen shop who knows Naruto’s attachment to his teammate is surprised as well; he makes no sound, breathing hollowly, shallowly, even as the pink haired girl hyperventilates. “I don’t have a boyfriend.” He repeats, sliding off the chair. “I’m full.” His second comment is to the ramen man, coins to pay for the meals, both his and Sakura’s -as it congeals into a thick gelatinous mass that would be distasteful to even Naruto- clink on the counter. He does not look at Sakura.
“Naruto- Naruto-san, wait!” The added suffix froze him in place. Even Sakura was not quite sure why she had added it on, except perhaps to try to placate his cold rage. “I’m sorry I pried. I didn’t mean to, I was afraid you were hurt or something-”
“I wasn’t.” He said, a tad unnecessarily, And Sakura wonders at the change in him. Naruto used to be so open… now he was so secretive. His face was a book under lock and key, one whose cover you could only see behind a distorted silver pane of glass. Nothing could be read in his face at all.
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Itachi’s fingers curled under Kakashi’s mask. Kakashi slammed his hand over Itachi’s eyes. Stalemate. Kakashi waited until he heard Itachi whisper-
“Mangekyou Sharingan.” He felt the chakra flare that let him know that it was really on before he let go his hold. He had a brief moment of surprise, noting that the pattern of the tomoe was different from his own, borrowed Sharingan, different from the other times he had seen it on Itachi. Itachi yanked down his mask before-
-------------Flash-------------
Minato yelped when Kakashi entered him. There was an undeniable urgency, a need to be rough, be quick, there was no time, no time at all.
“Kakashi…” Minato moaned as the younger man thrusts repeatedly, harder, and faster and deeper.
-------------Flash-------------
A kiss, shared, roughly and intimately in the few moments before battle and Kakashi feels like heaven. A memory to savor, a life to live before the roar of the return of Kyuubi-
-------------Flash-------------
Understanding in pain, lips together with Itachi’s, muffling moans produced by the other’s mouth as he cums all over Kakashi’s chest. The genjutsu held for such a short time, Itachi’s lack of concentration- Kakashi does not care. He saw Minato again, even for a few, short, precious moments. He keeps moving his hips- he has not had his climax yet, and Itachi would not care if he kept going.
Sometimes he thinks he can make out the name that Itachi murmurs in pleasure, very low, and it makes Kakashi smirk. He knows he has heard it at least once before, when Itachi was top. There is no rigmarole, no tumbler series of locks when Itachi initiates things.
Kakashi understands that there is pain in him far greater than what he is experiencing right now. Kakashi knows that Itachi comes to him because they both understand that, sometimes, physical pain will cleanse the emotional pain. Kakashi wants the Sharingan, wants Obito and Minato, both of whom are irrevocably, irreplaceably dead. Kakashi is only twenty-two years old, but he feels older. He feels older than the Sandaime even, sometimes. The weight of his pain is like a curse. Itachi has pain that Kakashi cannot understand. No one feels more betrayed than Kakashi when Itachi leaves. He hates Itachi, hates him for leaving when he was the only one who understood. He under stood, Kakashi knows. In time, Kakashi could have understood him as well.
Pain was a living thing. Kakashi wondered what Itachi saw behind his eyes when he closed them. Who he thought of while Kakashi was fucking him, bringing him the pain that could- at least temporarily- obliviate all else. Pain lived, pain breathed, and pain provided an outlet for itself at every opportunity. Like addiction, pain was a drug.
Kakashi voided himself inside Itachi, emptying himself of seminal fluids. He slumped forward, his head on Itachi’s shoulder as Itachi eased himself down. Kakashi lifted him slowly off his cock and helped him down; head close to Itachi’s just to hear his little whimpering sigh when he slipped out.
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Kakashi closed the door behind Itachi slowly. He could feel the smile/smirk on his face but did not care…
“Who do you want me to be today?” Itachi asked, and Kakashi gave a smirk of his own as Itachi began pulling off his weapons and placing them- Thunk, thunk, Thunk, thunk, so rhythmically, it was a beat almost like club music, like heartbeats, and god knows what else- onto the solid mahogany table, keeping his back towards Kakashi. Minato, Itachi expected the answer to come. Obito. Sometimes even Gai. Sometimes, it would be just- be a victim. Sometimes, it was I will not be looking at you, so I do not care. The answer was always swift. The sound of his shifting, the soft intake of breath, Itachi usually knew the answer before Kakashi said it. However, today, there was only silence, and Itachi turned around to see-
Kakashi was directly behind him. Had Itachi been anyone else, he would have taken an involuntary step back at the nearness, at the invasion of his personal space, but Itachi stayed put. Not because he had something to prove, mind. He stayed because there was nowhere to go. Directly behind him was the pressure of the desk, already he could feel it. Itachi blinked at the disruption of the routine.
“I want you to be you.” Kakashi responded, his mismatched eyes boring into Itachi’s silvery-black gaze. Kakashi had the satisfaction of hearing the minute intake of breath that denoted surprise, the slight-very slight-widening of the eyes, before Itachi’s eyes narrow. “Who do you want me to be, hmmm?” Kakashi asks, invading Itachi’s space more to whisper in his ear. Itachi’s hands land on his chest, starting to push away.
“I-” Itachi’s words become a breathless release of air when Kakashi interrupts him, because Kakashi’s voice has become higher, and childish, and his warm breath in Itachi’s ear is driving him so to distraction that he could swear that he had heard- because one of Kakashi’s talents is mimicking voices, you see. Moreover, the voice Kakashi has assumed is young. Very young in fact, about six-and-a-half years old, filled with vibrancy and adoration. And the tone and timbre and cadence and everything is just right for it to be-
“Nii-san, I have a secret…” Sasuke’s voice, but Itachi knows it is not Sasuke in the room with them. Even as he backs into the desk from surprise, backs away from Kakashi, it is not enough. Kakashi only leans closer, his palms on the desk his mouth to Itachi’s ear in that secretive, arousing way that Sasuke does it… “Nii-san, you wanna hear my secret?” Itachi’s fingers are fisting in Kakashi’s shirt, but he slips free. One movement clears the desk of all weaponry and has Kakashi sitting on it, his arms around Itachi’s neck. Itachi can see Kakashi’s hand-sign, the transformation jutsu, and suddenly, there is weight on his back.
“What’s your secret, Otouto?” Itachi’s voice is faint, but it does not waver, which is not much, but it is something to be grateful for.
“Nii-san, I dreamt about you…” Kakashi feels Itachi shudder and knows he has won.
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“Well, Sasuke-kun…” Sakura said, looking at the boy she was infatuated with [and her mind did not register that she said infatuated with and not in love with] and sighing slightly, “Your real question is: Who makes us everything we are?” Sakura finished. Sasuke blinked and she continued.
“With me, I hate to admit it, but it would have to be Ino. Our rivalry pushed me to be the best I could be. Then I met you, Naruto, and Kaka-sensei, and I strived to be better. To not look from the sidelines, and call myself your teammate when I’m always in the background.” The words spilled from her mouth like snakes, hard, coils of them that could only be forced out of their warm home. Sasuke did not notice his metaphor, but in the back of his mind, he always had an affinity for snakes. “Sasuke-kun and Naruto and Kakashi-sensei always protect me. Now the three for you have made me decide that I will never let anyone protect me. I will protect others. And I don’t care what the cost is of that.”
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Kakashi’s eyes followed Kushina. She was not in her usual clothes today, and the muted flash had not caught his attention at all. In fact, had she not had the distinctive hair color, he might have overlooked her entirely. He forced himself to appraise her attire, to figure out why today of all days she was so toned down as to almost pass under his radar. It would not happen again.
She wore a cape of a deep forest green, faded from washing that covered a brown velour top. Her skirt matched it, hemmed at mid-calf, overlapping high, soft leather boots, the kind that would feel supple, best used for making whips. The muted colors and simple style implied that it she had purposely avoided standing out today. With her thick, slightly curled auburn hair and high cheekbones, she had a wholesome, earthy look to her. Her eyes shone with an intensely keen intelligence and a zest for life. Kakashi’s eyes narrowed. The more he saw of that bitch, the more he hated her.
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People say that time answers all questions and heals all wounds.
Tick tock…
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A/N: I am not entirely sure why my beta decided that this section should be so long. Maybe it was just a whim. In any case, this is the last section that contains OC’s, I believe, unless there is a short part in the next one. I had actually thought that the section with Kushina would be in the next chapter, but I suppose I was wrong. ~shrugs~ Whatever. ~wipes forehead~ whoa… I am so glad to have finally gotten this posted. Malaya’s story request, The Apocrypha, is to be next for posting, since I am going to beta it myself. In fact, it should be up later on today, so go check it out!. I am starting to get to the other story requests now. I am probably going to get carpal tunnel from all the typing I do. Well, I hope you enjoyed this chapter! The next one will be out as soon as I get it back, and it should be the last chapter. So, Novocaine, ~winks~ I hope you enjoyed it. ^__^
Ciao!
Lyanvis Suzusuke.
You hold the power.
Use it wisely.
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“Do you want me?” Itachi asked, his back towards Kakashi, as he stripped off his shirt. Kakashi nodded slightly and responded. The answer was like tumblers in a lock. The wrong answer and Itachi would leave. The slightest variable would have Itachi turn and give him that look, and he would leave Kakashi feeling like a chastised puppy.
“I want you like I’ve never wanted anyone else.” It was a touch of ego stroking that Kakashi did not mind. With how hard he had worked to find the right answer, the words did not matter overmuch. Itachi deserved the ego stroking response, and lies were easier than the truth anyway. He had wanted others more- one other in particular, but Itachi was worth it.
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“What you’re talking about, Kakashi, is opportunity cost,” Obito says, proud to have remembered the economics lesson from the Academy. The Academy seems so long ago, to all of them, though Kakashi was a chunin before they even entered the Academy. He never brings this up, and neither do they. “Anyway though…. Kakashi, I don’t think that’s the real question,” Obito says finally. “The cost is only everything we could have been.” Obito shook his brown hair out of his eyes and looked- really looked at Kakashi: in one of his rare serious moments. “I think the question you really want to ask-”
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“Do you need me?” Itachi asked, his fingertips skimming under the waistband of Kakashi’s pants, his head down, face blocked from view by that long ass hair of his as he undid Kakashi's pants. The light touches drove Kakashi to distraction, as always. His partner was a sadist, it was often said. Kakashi very nearly stammered. Only the fear of Itachi leaving kept his baser instincts from taking over.
“I need you more than the air I breathe.” This line Kakashi had paid very dearly for. Blood, sweat, and tears, and it was worth every drop to get Itachi to stay. Kakashi only feared one thing, and that was to be alone. Itachi was his teammate, and this made their teamwork seamless. Each motion corresponded to an emotion to a reaction that would have them moving in perfect sync without words. And sometimes Itachi felt whimsical.
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Jiraya stared down at his ink-stained hands and smiled. He had finally finished the foreword for his epic book and it was perfect. He sighed in contentment.
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The death of the child was never directly linked to that of her parents. In the record books, the hypothesis ran as follows:
8:14:05. An unknown assailant kills Saki and Yamcha in the dressing room. The eldest daughter Mayuri escapes the assailant.
8:30.24. Megumi finishes his set and is killed by an unknown perpetrator, presumed Shinobi, also presumed to be the killer of Saki and the youngest child.
9:47:42. a villager spots Mayuri running into the woods. No one is observed following her.
10:24:05. Presumed time of death for Mayuri. Victim’s body is viciously attacked and cleaved nearly in two. Body bears marks similar to that of rape, but investigation does not find seminal fluids or foreign particulates. Due to the violent and contradictory nature of the assault, it can only be assumed that a second assailant attacked the girl once she had escaped the first.
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“Do you love me?” Itachi asked, pulling his lips away for a moment to ask. This answer had taken Kakashi longest to earn. He closed his eyes against the distracting sensation of Itachi’s lips returning to his cock, but it only intensified the feeling and he jerked his eyes open, as always. Itachi swallowed him down all the way, as Kakashi opened his mouth to speak. He let out a breath of air, trying to calm himself. If he stammered, Itachi would leave.
“I love you more than anything in this world.” Itachi’s smile/smirk as his lips released Kakashi’s cock was a temptation onto itself. Itachi stood and allowed Kakashi to strip him. Sometimes Kakashi wondered what this meant to Itachi. Sometimes he hated the sound of moans. Sometimes he loved them. Kakashi tried to avoid making any kind of noise until Itachi had. Sometimes Itachi rewarded him for his patience.
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Sasuke slept, curled into the warmth Naruto provided. Sakura curled against him, though she lay awake. The night was cold and the ground was rough. Thus, in Kakashi’s mind, both time and place were perfect for camping. Sakura huddled against Sasuke a little more under the blanket and in sleep, his arms tightened around her. A few weeks ago, she would have been elated at how near she was to Sasuke, but now she had mixed feelings on the issue. He shifted a little, and Sakura tried to shift away, not wanting to wake him, but only managed to turn around in his grasp. She looked at both her teammates to distract herself from his nearness. Naruto’s face buried in Sasuke’s back as though he were a human space heater, one arm around his chest, the other one lower down, around his waist. Sakura tried hard not to think about what she had seen, but it was difficult. Her mind clicked off almost completely when Sasuke pulled her close again in his sleep. Sakura’s eyes closed and she drank in the delicious warmth emanating from the two of them. Sakura sighed, cuddling into Sasuke to get as much warmth as she could, wishing the next day would come soon.
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“Do you love me?” it is Kakashi’s turn to ask. He had not learned this one for a long while. Itachi’s answers were always different, to every question besides this one. Itachi liked when Kakashi bit his nipples and Kakashi did, through the ever-present cloth on his face. The nine-year age gap between them did not really affect them, but it did make them keep things secret. Not that Kakashi wanted anyone to know of this, in any case.
“I’m in love with my lust.” Itachi responded, letting out a soft sigh when clothed teeth grazed sensitized nipples. His head fell back when those same teeth set to his neck. “We’ll turn angel wings to dust.” Itachi allowed him to caress his bare ass, bites returned. “Our breaths are heated sighs.” His hand wrapped around the base of Itachi’s cock, stroking it slowly. “They take us far across the skies.”
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And when Naruto’s eyes fill with tears he tries so hard not to shed, when Sakura cries so hard her body shakes, when Tazuna realizes how hard the life of a Shinobi is for the young ones- even for the old ones, Kakashi is nearly paralyzed. Not because he had thought- he would never admit to himself that he thought this team would outlive him, Kakashi would live forever that his student was dead. Not because he had no words to give to help grief pass. When Naruto realizes for the first time- when Naruto realizes Wow, death is real… for the first time, Kakashi is not able to help him through it.
If the pseudo-death had belonged to Naruto, had it been Naruto who ‘died’, Kakashi would have consoled the other two and would have taught them that lesson quickly. Nevertheless, Kakashi cannot teach Naruto about death. Naruto’s birth killed his mother- and somewhere Kakashi is glad that childbirth killed that damn bitch, she did not deserve to live anyway- and his life killed his father, the father Kakashi knew and Naruto never met. When Sasuke miraculously returns to the land of the living, none there is more relieved than Kakashi.
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“Do you need me?” Kakashi asked, and here the answers varied. Sometimes Kakashi wondered what would happen if he just left like Itachi, but he knows he does not have the power. If he were to just leave, then he would never have another chance. After all, Itachi does not need this as Kakashi does.
“Only to watch my back and provide my pleasure.” The touches became rougher. Kakashi found himself up against the wall and he reversed them. Itachi’s soft moan when his back hit the wall was pure eroticism. Kakashi grabbed a tube of lubrication from the dresser next to them.
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It was a swift thrust to the throat, with a blade sharp enough to split hairs, thin enough so any cut received would seal almost instantly. It was a blade reserved only for ANBU, or for the elite, reserved for missions requiring torture.
His father’s blade pierced the girl’s throat, ended her screams. He stripped her of clothes as she sobbed, and when she struck out at him, he very deliberately broke two of her fingers. He shoved two fingers in her mouth, two fingers down her throat, the same number of fingers he had broken. She whimpered uncomprehendingly. His fingers entered her roughly, and if she had the ability to, she would have screamed. What came out was a sound like strangling a cat underwater. Blood covered his fingers from his breaking her hymen and he shoved his fingers in deeper, using them to fuck her ruthlessly. Her back pressed against the bark of the tree. The roughness of it tore open the skin on her back and made more blood. His left arm pressed her harder against the tree.
The fingers go back in her mouth, gagging her on the taste of her own blood.
The sword enters through her stomach, up through the diaphragm, bisecting the bronchial tubes. The eyes of the killer are cold, hard, ruthless, yet somehow darkly amused- pleased. Hands with broken fingers and torn off fingernails scrabble at the hilt of the sword. He smiles at her sweetly, and for a moment- a moment as precious and fleeting as a heartbeat, she does not feel pain, so entranced she is with the handsome boy’s smile. His lips find her in a sweet gentle kiss. A malicious wrench of the blade twists the blade within her and she makes a sound- a sound like betrayal, but didn’t she know that he was going to kill her? Didn’t she know what it meant to have a sword in her stomach? How can she sound so betrayed if he stabbed her before he kissed her? The murderer wonders to himself. as it aligns with her spine. A jerk of the blade has her on her feet. It sliced through her sternum with uncanny ease. The sound of flesh splitting, and bones breaking/cracking/shearing apart follows closely, [but not too close, perhaps a full .03 nanoseconds after] the flash of steel as it rockets up, over and back down.
The source of the pivot was the exact center of the skull. The tip of the blade swiveled at that very spot, and then continued with no loss of momentum on its downward path, truly now bisecting the spine, perfectly down to the pelvis, where the blade simply stops. The corpse falls to the ground with a dull, sickening thud. Its blood was everywhere.
To the assailant, the body no longer has gender. It is simply a body. A corpse with no name, no face, and no importance, except it is the first person that he has ever mutilated, the first mission that he had ever been required to kill someone on, his fourth kill in one day.
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Kakashi looked down at his blood soaked hands and wondered if he would be able to meet his sensei‘s eyes the next day.
He does not flinch away from meeting that blue gaze, but Minato can sense the change, feel the blood on his student’s hands, and inwardly, he grieves.
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“Do you want me?” Kakashi stalled the question for a while, having had teased the Uchiha with his fingertips, touching the entrance lightly, stroking his testes with one finger until the slowness threatened to destroy him. Itachi loved it rough, and the light touches tormented him more than it tormented Kakashi.
“Yes!” Itachi gasps out. There is no preamble, no lyrical dissension or delaying tactic as with his other answers. There is only want, a want Kakashi is willing to fulfill. There is only need. There is only the pressing need for roughness, pain, to fuck, and be fucked. It is nothing more. That is why Kakashi shoves two fingers in now, with no hesitation.
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Itachi Knows.
He knows, and it’s so twisted that he’s just so [yes, he’s twisted, so twisted, everything is so fucking twisted, and he is no exception- fucked up, crazy, twisted like everything, everything is so fucking twisted and fucked up and over and sideways and upside down it makes you want to scream- go on, scream in this madness. Scream, my lovely, but no one will hear you. No one cares. Not in this twisted fucking world. Twisted like everything] so twisted, that he does not just not care, he likes it.
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Sakura’s face stung with the force of the slap, her head turned away, and her eyes became cloudy with tears. Naruto stared at his hand in [horror, you would think, since he just slapped his teammate, but no, he stares in] something akin to disgust.
“I don’t have a boyfriend.” He said, his voice empty, frighteningly so. Sakura has never heard Naruto sound so empty before this. He looked up at her, and she was afraid to speak, her mouth gaping open like a dead clam, the tongue meat no longer useful. “Don’t come to my house again.” The empty rings of defensiveness, something he feels like he needs to hide. The old man of the ramen shop who knows Naruto’s attachment to his teammate is surprised as well; he makes no sound, breathing hollowly, shallowly, even as the pink haired girl hyperventilates. “I don’t have a boyfriend.” He repeats, sliding off the chair. “I’m full.” His second comment is to the ramen man, coins to pay for the meals, both his and Sakura’s -as it congeals into a thick gelatinous mass that would be distasteful to even Naruto- clink on the counter. He does not look at Sakura.
“Naruto- Naruto-san, wait!” The added suffix froze him in place. Even Sakura was not quite sure why she had added it on, except perhaps to try to placate his cold rage. “I’m sorry I pried. I didn’t mean to, I was afraid you were hurt or something-”
“I wasn’t.” He said, a tad unnecessarily, And Sakura wonders at the change in him. Naruto used to be so open… now he was so secretive. His face was a book under lock and key, one whose cover you could only see behind a distorted silver pane of glass. Nothing could be read in his face at all.
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Itachi’s fingers curled under Kakashi’s mask. Kakashi slammed his hand over Itachi’s eyes. Stalemate. Kakashi waited until he heard Itachi whisper-
“Mangekyou Sharingan.” He felt the chakra flare that let him know that it was really on before he let go his hold. He had a brief moment of surprise, noting that the pattern of the tomoe was different from his own, borrowed Sharingan, different from the other times he had seen it on Itachi. Itachi yanked down his mask before-
-------------Flash-------------
Minato yelped when Kakashi entered him. There was an undeniable urgency, a need to be rough, be quick, there was no time, no time at all.
“Kakashi…” Minato moaned as the younger man thrusts repeatedly, harder, and faster and deeper.
-------------Flash-------------
A kiss, shared, roughly and intimately in the few moments before battle and Kakashi feels like heaven. A memory to savor, a life to live before the roar of the return of Kyuubi-
-------------Flash-------------
Understanding in pain, lips together with Itachi’s, muffling moans produced by the other’s mouth as he cums all over Kakashi’s chest. The genjutsu held for such a short time, Itachi’s lack of concentration- Kakashi does not care. He saw Minato again, even for a few, short, precious moments. He keeps moving his hips- he has not had his climax yet, and Itachi would not care if he kept going.
Sometimes he thinks he can make out the name that Itachi murmurs in pleasure, very low, and it makes Kakashi smirk. He knows he has heard it at least once before, when Itachi was top. There is no rigmarole, no tumbler series of locks when Itachi initiates things.
Kakashi understands that there is pain in him far greater than what he is experiencing right now. Kakashi knows that Itachi comes to him because they both understand that, sometimes, physical pain will cleanse the emotional pain. Kakashi wants the Sharingan, wants Obito and Minato, both of whom are irrevocably, irreplaceably dead. Kakashi is only twenty-two years old, but he feels older. He feels older than the Sandaime even, sometimes. The weight of his pain is like a curse. Itachi has pain that Kakashi cannot understand. No one feels more betrayed than Kakashi when Itachi leaves. He hates Itachi, hates him for leaving when he was the only one who understood. He under stood, Kakashi knows. In time, Kakashi could have understood him as well.
Pain was a living thing. Kakashi wondered what Itachi saw behind his eyes when he closed them. Who he thought of while Kakashi was fucking him, bringing him the pain that could- at least temporarily- obliviate all else. Pain lived, pain breathed, and pain provided an outlet for itself at every opportunity. Like addiction, pain was a drug.
Kakashi voided himself inside Itachi, emptying himself of seminal fluids. He slumped forward, his head on Itachi’s shoulder as Itachi eased himself down. Kakashi lifted him slowly off his cock and helped him down; head close to Itachi’s just to hear his little whimpering sigh when he slipped out.
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Kakashi closed the door behind Itachi slowly. He could feel the smile/smirk on his face but did not care…
“Who do you want me to be today?” Itachi asked, and Kakashi gave a smirk of his own as Itachi began pulling off his weapons and placing them- Thunk, thunk, Thunk, thunk, so rhythmically, it was a beat almost like club music, like heartbeats, and god knows what else- onto the solid mahogany table, keeping his back towards Kakashi. Minato, Itachi expected the answer to come. Obito. Sometimes even Gai. Sometimes, it would be just- be a victim. Sometimes, it was I will not be looking at you, so I do not care. The answer was always swift. The sound of his shifting, the soft intake of breath, Itachi usually knew the answer before Kakashi said it. However, today, there was only silence, and Itachi turned around to see-
Kakashi was directly behind him. Had Itachi been anyone else, he would have taken an involuntary step back at the nearness, at the invasion of his personal space, but Itachi stayed put. Not because he had something to prove, mind. He stayed because there was nowhere to go. Directly behind him was the pressure of the desk, already he could feel it. Itachi blinked at the disruption of the routine.
“I want you to be you.” Kakashi responded, his mismatched eyes boring into Itachi’s silvery-black gaze. Kakashi had the satisfaction of hearing the minute intake of breath that denoted surprise, the slight-very slight-widening of the eyes, before Itachi’s eyes narrow. “Who do you want me to be, hmmm?” Kakashi asks, invading Itachi’s space more to whisper in his ear. Itachi’s hands land on his chest, starting to push away.
“I-” Itachi’s words become a breathless release of air when Kakashi interrupts him, because Kakashi’s voice has become higher, and childish, and his warm breath in Itachi’s ear is driving him so to distraction that he could swear that he had heard- because one of Kakashi’s talents is mimicking voices, you see. Moreover, the voice Kakashi has assumed is young. Very young in fact, about six-and-a-half years old, filled with vibrancy and adoration. And the tone and timbre and cadence and everything is just right for it to be-
“Nii-san, I have a secret…” Sasuke’s voice, but Itachi knows it is not Sasuke in the room with them. Even as he backs into the desk from surprise, backs away from Kakashi, it is not enough. Kakashi only leans closer, his palms on the desk his mouth to Itachi’s ear in that secretive, arousing way that Sasuke does it… “Nii-san, you wanna hear my secret?” Itachi’s fingers are fisting in Kakashi’s shirt, but he slips free. One movement clears the desk of all weaponry and has Kakashi sitting on it, his arms around Itachi’s neck. Itachi can see Kakashi’s hand-sign, the transformation jutsu, and suddenly, there is weight on his back.
“What’s your secret, Otouto?” Itachi’s voice is faint, but it does not waver, which is not much, but it is something to be grateful for.
“Nii-san, I dreamt about you…” Kakashi feels Itachi shudder and knows he has won.
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“Well, Sasuke-kun…” Sakura said, looking at the boy she was infatuated with [and her mind did not register that she said infatuated with and not in love with] and sighing slightly, “Your real question is: Who makes us everything we are?” Sakura finished. Sasuke blinked and she continued.
“With me, I hate to admit it, but it would have to be Ino. Our rivalry pushed me to be the best I could be. Then I met you, Naruto, and Kaka-sensei, and I strived to be better. To not look from the sidelines, and call myself your teammate when I’m always in the background.” The words spilled from her mouth like snakes, hard, coils of them that could only be forced out of their warm home. Sasuke did not notice his metaphor, but in the back of his mind, he always had an affinity for snakes. “Sasuke-kun and Naruto and Kakashi-sensei always protect me. Now the three for you have made me decide that I will never let anyone protect me. I will protect others. And I don’t care what the cost is of that.”
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Kakashi’s eyes followed Kushina. She was not in her usual clothes today, and the muted flash had not caught his attention at all. In fact, had she not had the distinctive hair color, he might have overlooked her entirely. He forced himself to appraise her attire, to figure out why today of all days she was so toned down as to almost pass under his radar. It would not happen again.
She wore a cape of a deep forest green, faded from washing that covered a brown velour top. Her skirt matched it, hemmed at mid-calf, overlapping high, soft leather boots, the kind that would feel supple, best used for making whips. The muted colors and simple style implied that it she had purposely avoided standing out today. With her thick, slightly curled auburn hair and high cheekbones, she had a wholesome, earthy look to her. Her eyes shone with an intensely keen intelligence and a zest for life. Kakashi’s eyes narrowed. The more he saw of that bitch, the more he hated her.
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People say that time answers all questions and heals all wounds.
Tick tock…
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A/N: I am not entirely sure why my beta decided that this section should be so long. Maybe it was just a whim. In any case, this is the last section that contains OC’s, I believe, unless there is a short part in the next one. I had actually thought that the section with Kushina would be in the next chapter, but I suppose I was wrong. ~shrugs~ Whatever. ~wipes forehead~ whoa… I am so glad to have finally gotten this posted. Malaya’s story request, The Apocrypha, is to be next for posting, since I am going to beta it myself. In fact, it should be up later on today, so go check it out!. I am starting to get to the other story requests now. I am probably going to get carpal tunnel from all the typing I do. Well, I hope you enjoyed this chapter! The next one will be out as soon as I get it back, and it should be the last chapter. So, Novocaine, ~winks~ I hope you enjoyed it. ^__^
Ciao!
Lyanvis Suzusuke.
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