Categories > Celebrities > Fall Out Boy > My Heart Is On My Sleeve
You can have your cake and eat it too
What will Patrick and Pete do next?! This time I made sure to include America's 'Suiteheart' Madison in the story! Since they don't have this in the warnings list, I thought I should include this. ...
?Blocked
Chapter 26- You can have your cake and eat it too
~Pete~
I woke up sore, but it made me smile.
I looked over on Patrick's side, and he was lying on his back awake. He looked over at me and frowned.
I raised an eyebrow. “What?”
“My ass and the rest of my body hurts.”
I laughed. “Yeah, I'm hurtin' too.”
He rubbed his butt. “Jesus, it felt great last night. What happened to that?”
I propped myself on my elbow and faced Patrick. “To me, sex is like alcohol. It's good at the time, but when you wake up the next morning, you feel like shit. I guess the moral of the story is sometimes good things come with a price.”
“Great story, Pete. I'm gonna get up and make breakfast. You get up too.”
I held out a hand and Patrick pulled me up.
We walked down the hallway and saw Madison out of her bed. She had a sharpie marker in her hand and a Toys R Us catalog.
I bent down next to her. “Honey, what are you doing?”
She looked up at me with her pretty green eyes. She reminded me so much of Patrick.
“I'm circling what I want Santa to bring me.”
I smiled. Santa. I should probably tell her about that sometime. I took the catalog from her and my jaw dropped. Everything except a few items were circled in black.
“Uh, I don't think Santa has enough room on his sled for all of this.”
“And in his budget.” I mumbled.
She smiled. “Silly daddy, I circled the things I don't want in black. The things I do want are in red.”
Patrick ruffled her hair. “Good girl.”
I flipped through the catalog and found the stuff in red.
“Okay, lets see. I see a digital camera, a portable DVD player, a bike, a trampoline...”
“AND, a $900 pool.”
She smiled. “See, I kept it short!”
“Patrick, could I talk to you for a second?”
We walked outside the door. “Holy shit, she really does want all of this?! What kid needs a digital camera?!”
“Pete, it's a plastic camera. It takes real pictures but it's unbreakable. Come on, I really want this to be a really good Christmas for her.”
I sighed. “Do you think we can afford all of this?”
He looked at me like I had grown an extra arm. “Yeah, Pete, we're rockstars. We can afford it.”
We walked back into the room and Madison was still sitting on the ground. Patrick picked her up and kissed her.
“Well, we'll talk to Santa and see what we can do. But he's been telling us that you've been a good girl, so you might get what you want.”
She giggled. “Yay, daddy! I'm a good girl!”
Suddenly, Patrick's face looked surprised.
“Sweetie, are you wet?”
She frowned. “Yes.”
“Come on, I'll get you a new diaper.”
He carried her over to the changing table and changed her real quick.
“Pete, we need to potty train her.”
I scratched my head. “Didn't we do that already?”
“Well, I said that we should, but you said 'Maybe later, babe' and went to sleep.”
“So, do you want to go to the store for a potty seat or something?”
He looked at Madison. “Are you ready for potty training?”
She nodded.
“I guess that's a yes. Let's go.”
We got dressed and got Madison ready.
When we got to Babies R Us, we headed towards the potty seats.
We stood there and looked over the selection.
“Pete, what do you think? Should we get one that goes over the toilet or one that stands alone?”
“One that goes over the toilet so we don't have to do any dirty work.”
He screwed up his face. “Good point.”
He grabbed a pink one and he started walking the opposite direction of the registers.
“Where are you going?”
“I think Madison should have big girl underwear if she's gonna start acting like a big girl, right?”
She kissed the tip of his nose. “Right! I'm gonna be a bitch girl!”
“Honey, it's big girl.”
He turned towards me. “I thought I told you to stop cussing in front of her.”
“Hey, don't look at me. It seems like every time I'm on the phone, the little monster's right behind me.”
She stuck her tongue out at me. “Bitch.”
“Hey, don't you call me that. That's not a nice word.”
Patrick looked her straight in the eye. “If you don't stop saying that word, I'll tell Santa to put coal in your stocking, okay?”
She giggled. “Okay, daddy, I love you.” She kissed him on the cheek.
He sighed. “I can never stay mad at you. I love you too, Madison.”
I came over and kissed her cheek. “I love you.”
“I love you, too.” And she kissed me back.
“Hey, Patrick, I love you. I know it's been awhile since I've said it, but I do.”
He kissed my lips. “I love you too.”
We stopped having our heart-felt moment and went to the girls section. Patrick found the little girl underwear.
“Maddie, which do you like better, these ones with the butterflies or these ones with the hearts.”
“I like both.”
He sighed. “Okay, we can get both.”
She smiled. “Yay!”
We got to the register. Just our luck, the cashier was reading a magazine with our faces on it.
She looked up and nearly passed out.
“You're Patrick and Pete! Oh my God, I love you guys! You make a cute couple. Is that your little girl? She's so cute!”
She kept going on until I set our stuff on the counter.
“Oh, sorry. I need to check you guys out. Not that I haven't been already!”
She scanned our stuff and put them in a sac.
“Have a nice day!”
We left the store and went home. Patrick attached the potty seat on the toilet.
“Okay, Madison. Step one is to pull down your pants AND underwear.”
“But daddy, I don't have to go.”
“It's okay, it's just practice.”
She pulled both down.
“Step two, use this step stool to get on the toilet seat.”
She shuffled her way to the toilet and got on.
“Step three would be to just go, but I guess you don't have to right now. And after you were done, you'd use this toilet paper to wipe yourself.”
Madison sat there.
“So, you can get up now and do what you want.”
“I want to stay here until I can go.”
He knelt down beside her. “Honey, that may be a long time. It's best if you wait to do it later.”
She shook her head stubbornly. “I'm staying.”
He shrugged. “Suit yourself.”
I kissed her on the cheek. “Good luck, Maddie.”
We left the bathroom and closed the door behind us.
Patrick busted out laughing. “She looks so cute sitting on that toilet waiting for something to happen.”
I smiled. “I know. She'll get off soon, though. She can't sit still for long.”
“You're right. She'll be up in ten minutes.”
An hour passes and Madison is still in the bathroom.
I walk into the kitchen where Patrick is making a cake.
“What's with the cake?”
He smeared frosting on my cheek and licked it off. “It's for when Madison finally gets of the toilet. For the effort, basically. I know she's bored to death.”
“I brought her a book so she could read a little, but yeah, she's probably bored out of her mind.”
I suddenly felt something grab my hand.
“Daddy, I did it!”
I looked down at the smiling Madison. “You did it?”
“Yes, daddy, I made it in the potty!”
I picked her up and kissed and hugged her. “Great job! I'm so proud of you!”
Patrick kissed her cheek. “Me too! Oh, Maddie! I have a cake waiting for you right now.”
She pointed to the bathroom. “Go look!”
We walked into the bathroom and sure enough, there was yellow liquid inside.
Patrick smiled. “Wonderful, Madison! Now, I forgot to teach you step four and five. Step four, flush the toilet,” And he did so. “And step five is to wash your hands.”
She walked up to the step stool in front of the sink and washed her hands with soap and water.
“Are you ready for cake?”
“Yeah!”
“Okay, lets go cut it!”
We took her back into the kitchen where we had our victory cake. Potty training. Piece of cake.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Awwwwwww, Madison finally is potty trained! She just can't get any cuter, can she?! Hahahaha, I beat you guys to the story. I wrote it before you had a chance to make a suggestion! That's okay. After you read this one, I'm still taking suggestions!
Three words. READ AND COMMENT. Oh, one more word. NOW.
~Pete~
I woke up sore, but it made me smile.
I looked over on Patrick's side, and he was lying on his back awake. He looked over at me and frowned.
I raised an eyebrow. “What?”
“My ass and the rest of my body hurts.”
I laughed. “Yeah, I'm hurtin' too.”
He rubbed his butt. “Jesus, it felt great last night. What happened to that?”
I propped myself on my elbow and faced Patrick. “To me, sex is like alcohol. It's good at the time, but when you wake up the next morning, you feel like shit. I guess the moral of the story is sometimes good things come with a price.”
“Great story, Pete. I'm gonna get up and make breakfast. You get up too.”
I held out a hand and Patrick pulled me up.
We walked down the hallway and saw Madison out of her bed. She had a sharpie marker in her hand and a Toys R Us catalog.
I bent down next to her. “Honey, what are you doing?”
She looked up at me with her pretty green eyes. She reminded me so much of Patrick.
“I'm circling what I want Santa to bring me.”
I smiled. Santa. I should probably tell her about that sometime. I took the catalog from her and my jaw dropped. Everything except a few items were circled in black.
“Uh, I don't think Santa has enough room on his sled for all of this.”
“And in his budget.” I mumbled.
She smiled. “Silly daddy, I circled the things I don't want in black. The things I do want are in red.”
Patrick ruffled her hair. “Good girl.”
I flipped through the catalog and found the stuff in red.
“Okay, lets see. I see a digital camera, a portable DVD player, a bike, a trampoline...”
“AND, a $900 pool.”
She smiled. “See, I kept it short!”
“Patrick, could I talk to you for a second?”
We walked outside the door. “Holy shit, she really does want all of this?! What kid needs a digital camera?!”
“Pete, it's a plastic camera. It takes real pictures but it's unbreakable. Come on, I really want this to be a really good Christmas for her.”
I sighed. “Do you think we can afford all of this?”
He looked at me like I had grown an extra arm. “Yeah, Pete, we're rockstars. We can afford it.”
We walked back into the room and Madison was still sitting on the ground. Patrick picked her up and kissed her.
“Well, we'll talk to Santa and see what we can do. But he's been telling us that you've been a good girl, so you might get what you want.”
She giggled. “Yay, daddy! I'm a good girl!”
Suddenly, Patrick's face looked surprised.
“Sweetie, are you wet?”
She frowned. “Yes.”
“Come on, I'll get you a new diaper.”
He carried her over to the changing table and changed her real quick.
“Pete, we need to potty train her.”
I scratched my head. “Didn't we do that already?”
“Well, I said that we should, but you said 'Maybe later, babe' and went to sleep.”
“So, do you want to go to the store for a potty seat or something?”
He looked at Madison. “Are you ready for potty training?”
She nodded.
“I guess that's a yes. Let's go.”
We got dressed and got Madison ready.
When we got to Babies R Us, we headed towards the potty seats.
We stood there and looked over the selection.
“Pete, what do you think? Should we get one that goes over the toilet or one that stands alone?”
“One that goes over the toilet so we don't have to do any dirty work.”
He screwed up his face. “Good point.”
He grabbed a pink one and he started walking the opposite direction of the registers.
“Where are you going?”
“I think Madison should have big girl underwear if she's gonna start acting like a big girl, right?”
She kissed the tip of his nose. “Right! I'm gonna be a bitch girl!”
“Honey, it's big girl.”
He turned towards me. “I thought I told you to stop cussing in front of her.”
“Hey, don't look at me. It seems like every time I'm on the phone, the little monster's right behind me.”
She stuck her tongue out at me. “Bitch.”
“Hey, don't you call me that. That's not a nice word.”
Patrick looked her straight in the eye. “If you don't stop saying that word, I'll tell Santa to put coal in your stocking, okay?”
She giggled. “Okay, daddy, I love you.” She kissed him on the cheek.
He sighed. “I can never stay mad at you. I love you too, Madison.”
I came over and kissed her cheek. “I love you.”
“I love you, too.” And she kissed me back.
“Hey, Patrick, I love you. I know it's been awhile since I've said it, but I do.”
He kissed my lips. “I love you too.”
We stopped having our heart-felt moment and went to the girls section. Patrick found the little girl underwear.
“Maddie, which do you like better, these ones with the butterflies or these ones with the hearts.”
“I like both.”
He sighed. “Okay, we can get both.”
She smiled. “Yay!”
We got to the register. Just our luck, the cashier was reading a magazine with our faces on it.
She looked up and nearly passed out.
“You're Patrick and Pete! Oh my God, I love you guys! You make a cute couple. Is that your little girl? She's so cute!”
She kept going on until I set our stuff on the counter.
“Oh, sorry. I need to check you guys out. Not that I haven't been already!”
She scanned our stuff and put them in a sac.
“Have a nice day!”
We left the store and went home. Patrick attached the potty seat on the toilet.
“Okay, Madison. Step one is to pull down your pants AND underwear.”
“But daddy, I don't have to go.”
“It's okay, it's just practice.”
She pulled both down.
“Step two, use this step stool to get on the toilet seat.”
She shuffled her way to the toilet and got on.
“Step three would be to just go, but I guess you don't have to right now. And after you were done, you'd use this toilet paper to wipe yourself.”
Madison sat there.
“So, you can get up now and do what you want.”
“I want to stay here until I can go.”
He knelt down beside her. “Honey, that may be a long time. It's best if you wait to do it later.”
She shook her head stubbornly. “I'm staying.”
He shrugged. “Suit yourself.”
I kissed her on the cheek. “Good luck, Maddie.”
We left the bathroom and closed the door behind us.
Patrick busted out laughing. “She looks so cute sitting on that toilet waiting for something to happen.”
I smiled. “I know. She'll get off soon, though. She can't sit still for long.”
“You're right. She'll be up in ten minutes.”
An hour passes and Madison is still in the bathroom.
I walk into the kitchen where Patrick is making a cake.
“What's with the cake?”
He smeared frosting on my cheek and licked it off. “It's for when Madison finally gets of the toilet. For the effort, basically. I know she's bored to death.”
“I brought her a book so she could read a little, but yeah, she's probably bored out of her mind.”
I suddenly felt something grab my hand.
“Daddy, I did it!”
I looked down at the smiling Madison. “You did it?”
“Yes, daddy, I made it in the potty!”
I picked her up and kissed and hugged her. “Great job! I'm so proud of you!”
Patrick kissed her cheek. “Me too! Oh, Maddie! I have a cake waiting for you right now.”
She pointed to the bathroom. “Go look!”
We walked into the bathroom and sure enough, there was yellow liquid inside.
Patrick smiled. “Wonderful, Madison! Now, I forgot to teach you step four and five. Step four, flush the toilet,” And he did so. “And step five is to wash your hands.”
She walked up to the step stool in front of the sink and washed her hands with soap and water.
“Are you ready for cake?”
“Yeah!”
“Okay, lets go cut it!”
We took her back into the kitchen where we had our victory cake. Potty training. Piece of cake.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Awwwwwww, Madison finally is potty trained! She just can't get any cuter, can she?! Hahahaha, I beat you guys to the story. I wrote it before you had a chance to make a suggestion! That's okay. After you read this one, I'm still taking suggestions!
Three words. READ AND COMMENT. Oh, one more word. NOW.
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