FicWad

Chapter 52:- Conflict and Confusion

A/N: The normal, Malehorntaildragon cheers for your work and thoughts. GML thank you as well.



**

He was at home, at peace, even though he was walking towards the common room and his ‘supposed’ girlfriend he still felt calm and a little giddy. Harry suspected that every man felt a little like this after sex but for him this was something different: he didn't know why but he was sure that it was different. His magic felt alive yet under control, but it was his mind and body that told him he was different, the stresses and problems he had all day had just washed away by one beautiful act.

The last time that he had done anything sexual with Luna he had almost fled from the room but this time he had acted differently. He felt the corners of his mouth turn upwards as he remembered. After his last gasp and thrust, he had just laid there almost but not quite on top of Luna. Every emotion he could think of was running through his body but he still laid there. He remembered the feeling of her hands as they gently stroked his back in comfort or something. As he deflated and left her warm opening he had straightened up, part of him wanted to run and hide at what he had done but he still stood there and then she spoke to him.

She had talked about woman and men and about age. His mind had been full of new thoughts and old conflicts but eventually she pulled him back on top of her. The warmth of her body and the softness of her voice soothed away his worries. His mind felt sharper and in focus as it sorted through everything that she had told him. As he had lain there thinking she had continued to speak, soft words murmuring of her life. He couldn’t remember what she had said in that time, but he could vividly remember him holding her as much as she did him. It seemed she spoke of her life before school. It frustrated him slightly that he could not remember what she had said but he did feel that somehow he knew her more that he ever had. Eventually the cold drove them to leave their warm embrace and replace their shed clothing and with a long sensual kiss they left their sudden retreat.

Hand in hand once more they had walked the corridors towards the main entrance where Luna kissed him on the cheek and parted from him telling him that she had reading and homework to do but they should continue their ‘talks’ soon. Harry eyes had watched Luna as she had left him; he felt a little alone as he stood there but something touched his mind caressed it as only one person he knew could. He glowed in the felling of that gentle touch but was disturbed at what he had just done to his ‘Girlfriend’ and ‘Teacher’. Here he was standing in the main entrance with a little Veela girl caressing his worries from his mind and watching the very nice view of a retreating Luna while Ginny was in the Common room completely oblivious to what he had just done.

Turning to the stairs he started to make his way back trying to find the words that he could say to her but unable to think of them as his mind just wanted to bask in the memories of the past hour. Pushing open the portrait he climbed in and braced himself, he was sure that everyone would instantly know what he had done: it must be plain on his face. How could he even look at the room and especially Ginny, she must hate him more and more for being so selfish and unfaithful. However, tinged with all of this sudden guilt was the feeling that he had learnt something new today and it was important. He was not sure if it was what Fawkes had said or those words from Luna or even if it was something else but he had learnt something very important, he just needed some time to work it all out. As he stood rooted to the spot and looked into the common room, he saw all of the normal activities one would find yet he did not see either Ron or Hermione. Secretly he was pleased because his two best friends would not be able to help him now, especially Ron. Bloke’s do not normally talk about these things and especially if you were dating their sister.

With all of that said the Common room wasn’t deserted of all Weasley presence, he could not fail to notice Ginny, she had changed her clothes since this morning but to Harry mind’s eye she still looked beautiful and the guilt fully formed at his crass actions. Ginny raised her head up from the homework that she was doing and looked into his eyes. Harry could almost feel those soft brown eyes looking into his mind and soul; she must be able to read what had happened. She rose to her feet and started towards him her hips swayed as she approached him and he found it hard to read the look in her eyes.

He opened his mouth to say something, anything, to apologise, to confess what happened, yet he didn't know what to say but he had to say something to this girl. His eyes sought the boy’s staircase because that would hold his retreat if he could make it to them, then he would be safe, well safe until Ron came back, but he was drawn back to Ginny. She stopped in front of him for a moment and looked at him, Harry started to say the words he had dreaded to say but Ginny placed her finger on his lips to silence him. He felt it rub ever so lightly across his lips causing his exhausted member to react, he closed his mouth and waited expecting Ginny’s explosion but it never came she stepped closed and pulled him close to her.

“I already know and understand. I don't hate you, I never could.”

“But...”

Ginny closed her eyes as she remembered the vivid scenes from this morning.

“I do understand, I wish it could have been me but I realise that was never going to happen. I’ve my own problems but afterwards, then, yes, together we can have our own experience, you me, Gabrielle, Luna and Susan we are going to be different to others but the same to you I can see it, feel it, can you now?”

Harry listened to the words and felt the truth within him; it was as though more pieces of his life puzzle were coming together he felt the picture start to form. He wasn’t sure of all of the detail but it was there.

“Yes, I think so...I’m sorry-” He started to apologise but he once more halted by Ginny.

“No I knew what I was doing this morning, I had originally hoped for something slightly different but think this is more than fine. I imagine you have a lot to think about so do so, but remember the rest of us; we aren’t upset and never will be and don’t think of my brother. It doesn’t matter; we know: you, me, Gabrielle and now Luna that we will be together and if he can’t accept that then I’ll Hex him until he does....”

“I still had...and you’re my-” stammered Harry for a final time still trying to apologise for his actions.

“Yes I’m your girlfriend and still am...” she lowered her voice so that only he could hear it. “Having sex with one of the others would never stop that Harry, but don’t look outside or...”

Harry quickly looked at her face and saw the sudden steel in it. A small shiver ran through him but he would never consider anything like that, but yesterday he would never had considered having sex.

“...go on Harry. I have to finish my homework and I think you need some time.”

He gave her lips the kiss that they were dying for, strangely for Harry’s mind nothing was said or heard from the other students it was though the pair of them were left alone. He was almost standing in the entrance to the common room in full view kissing Ginny but nothing, not one word, was said. As they separated, Ginny took and step back and mouthed the words ‘Thank you’ before she turned and headed to the table she had her homework on. Harry watched her go the whole way before he set off for his room and the solitude of his bed he needed to think through everything that had happened.

After undressing he pulled the curtains closed and laid back, exhaustion overtook him far quicker than he realised and soon he was breathing softly as he slept and dreamt.

**

If anyone had watched Harry through the night they would have seen a very troubled young man but no one had seen him, or no one who could or would do anything about it. He had dropped off to sleep quickly but sometime in the night his mind started to fight the battle within it and so throughout the early hours of the morning anyone could see the furrows on Harry brow has his mind wracked his body over what had happened. Eventually as morning broke he woke up, his eyes flashing open and he remembered the dreams.

Throughout the night he had dreamt of this and that but always returning to his Aunt. He could remember the talks, the raised voices and her teaching: sex was bad - only in marriage should it be allowed, he should never look at a girl, he was unworthy, useless, only good enough to cook and clean for his gracious Aunt. Yet every image, every memory seemed distorted they seemed changed, every time in his dream that he was made to suffer a new person was there arguing with him against his Aunt. The argument was always the same, ‘it wasn’t bad, it wasn’t wrong, love and sex are a part of life and they should be experienced by all.’

Swinging himself round so that he was sitting on the bed, he understood what had happened all night. He had argued with his inner self and this morning was the result. Getting to his feet he felt nearly as tired as when he went to bed but he dragged himself into the shower. Making sure he didn't wake the others he let the water run and wash over his body. His mind was exhausted from its night’s battle but Harry knew that his Aunt had been wrong. He raised his head up and let the water hit his face as he processed everything that he had learnt the day before yet to him it seemed easier. He no longer wanted to argue with himself, he had run that race and now there was acceptance.

Stepping back he looked up at the ceiling and spoke his first words of the day. “Perception is indeed everything, and nothing is wrong so long as we are happy.” Where this philosophy had come from he didn't know but what he did know was that he was happy and that mattered to him. Thinking through his life so far he could not find many times that he was happy before Hogwarts. The only time that he had felt anywhere close to happy outside of this castle had been the summer. That thought brought forth the next one, love, what was love? Everyone seemed to have a different opinion to his; to him love was something mystical between his parents and such but now after everything of the past day he had to think again.

Ginny constantly told him that she loved him, yesterday Luna had said the same but he could not feel that he could say the words in return. Did he love Ginny; did he love Luna; and what about Gabrielle or Susan? Somewhere he knew he wanted the others to be there with him, the Sunday lessons were always good but to him, they were much more than that, they were comforting. He would miss them if they ever stopped. Just being in the room with the other girls that he was connected too seemed to calm him more than anyone or anything had ever done. Was this Love? And if it was, did he love them all? He thought he loved Ginny, he must because she was his girlfriend, did he love Luna, she had sex with him but was that love? What about Gabrielle, deep down he wanted to be with her, she was mature yet needing; he felt safe, happy with her was this love as well? Then lastly was Susan, never demanding always helping he looked to her to help him and when she did pleasure coursed through him. Was this Love as well?

How could Love be all of these? Shouldn’t it be something certain, definite, not so confusing or complex. Quickly drying himself he returned back to get dressed, he didn't have long before he knew his dorm mates would wake but wanted to go to the common room he was sure that one of those in his thoughts would be awake.

He entered the common room and saw that a few people were already up and were doing homework, others were reading but his eyes easily locked onto the one that he wanted. Gabrielle looked up as her magic felt him, to her he seemed calmer than normal, she knew exactly what had happened with Luna but this change in Harry was a little worrying but mostly pleasurable. He crossed to her and sat down, not in his normal chair but beside her on the sofa. Chantelle looked up from Gabrielle’s lap as he did so and she felt the tiny rabbit start to move as it looked up expectantly at Harry.

“Morning” said Gabrielle.

“Morning” replied Harry who then looked down at the rabbit. To Gabrielle’s surprise he picked it up, something he had never done. He raised it up until they were looking at each other eye to eye then Harry lent forward and rubbed his nose against the rabbit’s very much like how Midnight greeted the rabbit.

“And morning to you too.” Said Harry in a cheery voice.

“You seem happy?” ventured Gabrielle.

“I think I am. I think I’m beginning to understand some new things although others parts are just confusing. I felt lost last year with just Cho around, now it's even worse; every time I think I understand, something changes.

"Harry that's just it, don't try and understand this just let it all happen."

"It's not that simple I feel...I think I'm...."

"Harry it is simple you just have to let it happen that's all. Everything will be fine, trust me."

Harry did not say anything in reply he just looked closely at the girl next to him. It was times like this that it sounded so strange to him to listen to someone who was a first year.

"Gabrielle, why do you sound so...mature?"

Gabrielle had to give herself a smile, she had expected a number of different questions after Harry's last night adventure but this really wasn't one of them. She looked at his hands as he absently stroked Chantelle before replying.

"It's you Harry.”

"Me?"

"Yes, it was the first thing that I learnt from my Grandmamma about my magic. When you first met me I had another goal in life, I wanted to be the 'pretty little girl' forever and my magic complied. It changed me, ever so slowly but it made sure that my one wish would come true. After...you, I had a different goal and I studied and learnt all that I could, my magic helped, it changed me, I became something you would want."

"I would want?"

Gabrielle could feel the blush in her cheeks but knew that nothing of it would show. She didn’t want to tell him that she would change to please him, it would be slow but it would happen. There would be nothing major but if he liked tall girls then she would grow or she would stay short: whatever would please him. She had unconsciously done it when she was small and she was sure that it would continue but if she told him now then....

“I haven’t finished...growing. My Veela side will still control...my body for a while.”

"That...that..." Harry stammered. His mind rushed through what Gabriele had been talking about. He thought it was a simple question but it seemed that he had started something and he wasn’t sure what... the rudimentary sense he was getting through the bond was telling him something different than her simple words.

"Harry you don't see yourself, you just look at the those around you, never do you step back and think about you."

"That’s not right I do think about myself!" quickly replied Harry.

"Harry be honest what do you see when you look at me?"

"I see...a girl, a friend and my teacher."

"Exactly, you see all of that but you refuse to see what everyone else does. You know that I'm a Veela you can see my wings yet you never mention them or my heritage. You give me the only thing that I want. Everyone else looks at me differently they would look at me for what I am, something to be used and then traded away."

"I would...."

Gabrielle raised her hand to stop Harry from speaking.

"That's it Harry you give me everything that I want but take nothing. I am not the only one, you do that to everyone you meet. Hermione once said you had a saving people thing. That is true, but that is not all of it! You just want to help everyone."

Harry's hand had stopped it movement as he continued to look at Gabrielle.

"Think about the rest of us that are bonded to you. You give each one of us something yet you do not take anything back, each one of us offers you something yet you refuse. Think about Luna for a moment, how many friends does she have apart from us?"

"Um...none?" he ventured.

“Exactly, she doesn’t really have any. Because of that, she is finding ways to try to spend more time with you, and I’m sure she wants more than that, but you just try and be that friend and nothing more. Susan wants to help you, you let her, she helps to do your homework, you feel guilty but she is happy. You don't ask her to help you with anything else, that would be taking. Ginny you are trying to be the perfect boyfriend for her not understanding that there is no such thing as a perfect boyfriend especially when it comes to all of this."

"Well, what about you, what do you want?" he asked noting that she hadn’t mentioned anything about herself and the sense he was feeling from her needed explaining.

Gabrielle stiffened, she hadn’t expected that, she had come dangerously close a moment ago telling him straight out but had moved away from it. She looked at him in fear, shaking her head no. “I…I can’t tell you.”

“But why not? You have told me about the others.” He continued questionably.

“Because-“ She started shakily, “because I don’t want to be rejected. You, you won’t take what I offer and I need, “She continued tears in her eyes. Here it was, her chance, the one time they were alone and talking where she could tell him everything, but she knew, she knew with absolute certainty that he would reject her he was only now just looking at the others. If she said what she wanted him to do he would then see her as the 'little girl' who has a crush on him and she simply couldn’t take the chance on that rejection. “I can’t force, or tell you, it would be wrong. No matter how much I want to, I just can’t. It’s something you have to figure out on your own, and then act upon it.” She finished sadly.

Before he could reply Harry turned his head as they both heard a yawning coming from one of the stairs. Ginny was framed at the bottom with her hand over her mouth still trying to hide the yawn. Harry leapt to his feet and placed the rabbit back on Gabrielle before crossing to Ginny. His arms encircled her waist and he pulled her close giving her a quick kiss.

“Morning Ginny, still tired?”

“A little, I was doing homework until late.”

“Oh do you want a hand?”

“No it’s finished but thanks for the offer.”

Harry lent back and studied Ginny briefly.

“I see you are back in the old uniform today?”

“Yes I thought for the best.”

“Ok but you did look very good in it, did I tell you that?”

“Oh I can get changed if you want.” Ginny said with a little trepidation. She had to change yesterday when the looks she was receiving became too much, but if Harry really wanted her to wear it she could, it was still ooh so nice and she would for him any day.

“No...No I don’t mind what you are wearing it’s still nice. How about you, me and Gabrielle go for breakfast now.”

“What without waiting for Ron or Hermione?”

“I’m sure they will catch up with us come on.” He turned and grasped Ginny’s hand and led her towards the portrait hole. Gabrielle had risen and followed them as Harry knew; he stopped a few paces outside of the portrait and looked back at Gabrielle. Somehow he knew she would follow them to breakfast, it was like a thought or understanding but he knew.

Harry’s good but contemplative mood lasted until they reached the entrance hall. Gabrielle could feel his sudden drop in emotions instantly but this time she didn’t do anything as she knew the cause. Harry was happy, the conflict his mind had had over the night had seemed to clear it, he didn’t know where everything was going but he knew that now he was going to make his own choices he wasn’t going to follow his Aunt’s or anyone’s teaching. People kept telling him that it was up to him and so he was going to follow that advice but as he walked with Ginny, but every happy conclusion almost evaporated. Descending from one of the other stairs was Luna she looked exactly the same as normal but Harry felt his stomach drop, last night he had sex with her, the last taboo in his mind broken but now barely hours afterwards he was standing with his girlfriend looking at her.

Luna’s eyes looked over the group before locking onto Harry’s. He felt his mouth go dry as she approached him. Suddenly fear gripped him and he couldn’t move. Luna stopped in front of Harry and briefly glancing at Ginny she lent forward and kissed his cheek.

“Morning Harry, you looked happy.”

“He is.” Replied Ginny smiling seeing the embarrassment and abject fear running through Harry, now he may started to realise what she had been telling him.

“That was fun last night, if you want to talk more I’m sure....” but before she could finished Harry butted in.

“Ah...um...thanks Luna ...”

Ginny jumped in herself at Harry’s pause.

“Did you enjoy yourself last night?” she purred.

Harry sputtered at Ginny’s words, she seemed so happy and sure of herself he was beginning to think that she didn't know what really had happened but now he was sure that she did. A little bit a fear crept deeper into him at the sudden thought that she was going to say even more aloud.



“Oh yes it was wonderful.” .” Luna continued glancing at the struggling Harry and the clearly beaming Ginny. “I think he may have finally chased away the Warblers that were affecting his thought processes.”

“Warblers?” Gabrielle asked in a confused tone, she knew exactly what had happened to Harry but this sudden talk about Warberlers didn't make one bit of sense.

Luna turned to the younger girl, and Gabrielle swore she could see a glint of amusement attempting to ruin Luna’s dreamy facade. Meanwhile Harry was still choking on his words, and looking more confused embarrassed by the second at this sudden conversation in such a public place.

“Yes, Wandering Warblers have been known to attach themselves to a person, and cause a slight buzzing sound inside their head. It really is quite hard to think straight with that going on. Luckily after a while they disengage themselves or are chased away but when they do they release a large amount of hormones into the host body which in turns needs to be released, for example in an orgasm or such like.” Luna finished.

At the word orgasm Harry looked about ready to run and hide, even as Ginny noticed the sudden tightness in Harry, including his trousers. Turning to Luna once more she saw the amusement trying to escape from Lunas normally tranquil face, the red head decided there was a lot more to Loony Luna than people thought

“Would you like to join us for breakfast?” she asked getting her thoughts back under control.

“I would love to but I promised Susan that I would sit with her today.” Replied Luna looking round to see if her friend had arrived yet.

“It’s alright she can join us.”

“No I don't think that she can handle it just yet, she’s still a bit silly about it, you know house rivalries and all that. Something tells me I will have to take care of a few more Warblers before she is comfortable joining us.” She replied smiling before turning and heading into the great hall.

Ginny turned to look at her Boyfriend. “See Harry it’s not just you? Now let’s have breakfast.”

Harry had almost recovered but then Luna had mentioned Warblers and Susan had set him off again. His mind easily brought forth the thought of Susan and Luna together. His body wanted to react to this sudden image but he forced it away, a lot had happened and most of it to him in the past day and a new thought like that wasn’t going to help him cope with it all. Yet the seemingly calm acceptance of Ginny towards Luna still stunned him, everything inside of him was telling him that she should be furious with him yet she seemed so happy.

Gabrielle giggled at the gobsmacked look on Harrys face, even as she fought for control her emotions as she picked up on Harrys thoughts through her connection.

“I think he’s broken.” She whispered to Ginny.

Ginny nodded in response trying to suppress a grin of her own. They each took an arm and they pulled him towards the Great Hall. Harry, still trying to clear images of Susan and Luna together, and then Ginny alone with him and finally Gabrielle out of his mind, allowed them to guide him to his normal seat.

Harry was back to normal by the time Ron and Hermione joined them but he had almost finished his breakfast. He looked at the red head next to him and then to the other side and the blond head of Gabrielle, both had been quiet but he saw that they each wore the exact same grin on their faces. Almost certain that they were having a little fun with him he decided to get his own back on them for there comments. So in a stage whisper, loud enough for Gabrielle to hear as well he asked Ginny.

“So do either of you two have a Warbler problem? I would be happy to help with the aftermath.” he said with a grin feeling very bold at the obvious sexual reference.

Ginny turned scarlet and Gabrielle instantly dropped her head their grins both fading from sight.

Harry turned to his food with a smug expression across his face pleased at what he had said. That was until Ron looked at him straight in the face waving his fork, which still had a half eaten sausage on it and said.

“What’s a Warbler Mate?”



***

Draco looked out of the enchanted window, Snape had charmed all of the windows in his classroom to be blank but he knew the counter charm. A small warning message flashed across his brain at this, where had he learned it? It seemed to scream this message to him but as quickly as if formed it was dismissed by a stronger voice. As he peered out awaiting his head of house to arrive he could see the forming clouds, he had spent too long in Scotland not to understand that it would soon snow, it might not be today but it would be soon.

The term was ending and the snow hailed its arrival, as did this meeting. Snape had asked him months ago to find these people and he had done so but it wasn’t until now that he had been asked to gather them all here. Bored at looking outside he let his eyes wash over those he had gathered. Many of them were his friends, if he could call anyone now his friend; they were people that would do his bidding. Most of them were like him, pure of blood and defiant to everything that this school stood for but some were different. He hadn’t been sure at first that they were the right people but they all had responded to him they could be just the fodder he needed in the coming time.

He looked over at the girl sitting next to him, there were not many girls present but those that were were all of strong character. Draco was sure that whatever was going to be offered, these girls might not like it. It did not worry him because of the girl next to him. No matter what happened, she would do as he told her to. Even this morning she had performed for him, he had awaked in ‘need of relief’ and she had given it to him. Now as he waited a new scheme crossed his mind, Pansy was good for him she would become his perfect wife but he was now looking for another.

Ever since cornering that Veela his mind had been on her perfect body. The status that it would bring would be almost as good as the pleasure he would gain from taking her. He almost licked his lips in the anticipation of having that girl writhing under him she would submit and if she did not then he would show her his displeasure. His scheme started to form it was simple yet brilliant she would be his before the week was out. Within this room were people who would help him, he would use them promise them a go with her, all he now needed was a room. Looking around the room once more but this time more closely he saw sudden possibilities. Snape would give him this room he was sure of that, he almost drew out his wand to see what spells had been placed within its walls but refrained from doing so. As long as the door was secure, all would be safe. He would make sure that she never said a word and even if she did, it would be her word against many.

The plan almost fell out of his mind in the speed it came together there were just a few problems left, contacting her and the time. He needed time, he didn't want to be rushed but she was always present around Potter and never alone, he had to get her away from him. He wasn’t worried about him, he had bested him on the train it was, that Potter would be inconvenience if anything thing went wrong.

His mind started thinking back through the school year, trying to think of times when they wouldn’t be together. His mind brought back a day when he had spent in the library, and she was there. That would work, he thought to himself. It was one of the few times when she wasn’t with Potter, he’d be busy with something else, by the time he was done, she would be his. Draco couldn’t help but smile to himself Potter always spent so much time working on defending himself and others. The irony of destroying something that Potter worked on defending, sent sheer joy through him.

Draco brought his attention back as the sound of the closing door reached his ears. He was certain that most of the others would have missed it but not him he had been waiting for it. He watched Snape walk purposeful forward to Draco’s eyes he seemed less menacing than normal he almost look happy.

“Good evening Gentleman, Ladies.” Said Snape stopping at the front. He had never been so cordial in his life but those before him were going to be his core, no matter what happened in the years to come they were the core of his dream and so if he had to be a little nice then he would do so.

“You are all here because you have come to believe that this school is run by incompetents, so I’m giving you a chance to gain the knowledge you want.”

Draco wasn’t going to say anything at this meeting, the last message he had received from Mr Smith had alerted him to something that had been kept a secret from him. He was sure that he knew what Snape was talking about and it would be just perfect for him. Snape had offered him power and he had been right he would be a true power. He just sat back and listened as Snape spun his web; it was easy to see the eyes change in everybody around as they fell into his world. They would change schools and have a school run by the true master, there they would learn how wizards should truly be, have muggles wait upon them nothing would be outlawed they would all become kings, and Draco was sure he would be at the top.

**

Harry had become almost so familiar with Professor Dumbledore’s office this year as he was with the Gryffindor common room. He had waited the customary moment for the gargoyle to recognise the passwords and then move aside. He suspected that the passwords were more of a ruse than the actual way to enter the office but he never said anything. As he entered the office, he saw that it was arranged in a more open fashion. A small smile crossed his face as he realised that some time tonight they would actually practice a little more, the memories were interesting but he wanted to learn something more practical. After the past 48 hours he had felt so good that a little practice would be perfect for him. He glanced at the large desk and saw a little surprised that the pensive was out upon it.

“Harry, on time once more, good, please take a seat.”

Harry crossed to his normal chair and glanced up to the ceiling, he saw Fawkes high perch but the bird wasn’t present.

“Ah you have noticed, I’m afraid that Fawkes doesn’t want to be present tonight, well at least for the start. I think it’s to do with the memory I’m going to show.”

“Why what’s it about?”

“A very dark secret I suspect, she always becomes a little agitated whenever we talk about it.”

“Is it dangerous to do this without her present?” Asked Harry suddenly more than a little worried.

“To us, not directly, we will be safe, the information on the other hand well... as one wise man once said a little knowledge can be dangerous. But don't fret; no one knows the password so we shall be safe whilst we learn of this dark secret.”

“So viewing memories is dangerous?”

Dumbledore sat back and placed his hands together. Harry had never questioned anything that they had done before up until now. His mind didn’t process the answer for he already knew it; it processed this change in Harry. Minerva had mentioned that some people seemed different this year and she feared for them and one of them was Harry. He himself was trying to change the boy, time was short and he was pushing fast but was this was the first sign that he was succeeding.

Dumbledore carefully measured his voice as he started his reply “It can be, you see when we view the memories our mind is no longer present within our own bodies. The pensive transfers it to the bowl; if something happens to either it could be unwelcome.”

Harry easily recalled a conversation he had with Gabrielle and Ginny after the first lesson with Dumbledore when he had entered the Pensive, this new information started to make sense of what Gabrielle had spoken off, being able to sense him but not completely, not like normal. The way that the girl could sense him amazed him slightly, somehow she always knew how he felt, and he knew it was the connection but it was still amazing that the little first year was always present with a word or comment that lifted the veil of sadness or whatever from his mind. But his body reminded him that Ginny did the same, she used her own body: a hug or a kiss and always when he needed it.

He looked at the Headmaster and saw the gleam in his eye, he suddenly worried that the Headmaster was reading his thoughts. Like lightning he flowed over his mental barriers searching for a hole or an attack but found none. Feeling confident that nothing was happening he continued with his questions.

“So it’s like our mind or magic has been separated from our body.”

“Yes and if anything happens to the body the magic would have no home to return.”

“Would we die?”

“Yes without a connection to our core our conscious would die fairly quickly.”

Harry wasn’t shocked at the answer as he had suspected it, somehow he still felt calm. He wanted to slip into his magic but thought that it might seem rude but a new question formed so he asked it.

“Could the reverse happen?”

Dumbledore’s brow furrowed very slightly as he considered the question. This was another little piece of proof of the change within Harry; the question was very insightful almost probing yet he had never been like it. Always it had been Hermione with these types of questions not Harry.

“Well not really, we cannot interact with the memory so cannot be harmed. We could of course be shocked at what we see but that shouldn’t have any effect as we are aware of it being just a memory. The only danger would be if the pensive broke, the magic contained within the stone holds our conscious and that of the memory if it was interrupted or failed there could be problems but our mind should just return to our core. But I think that is something we don't want to test?”

“Yes sir.”

“Well then let’s get this last memory for the term over with.”

“Last one sir?”

“Yes with only a few weeks left I don’t think we can get another lesson in, after this you will have some homework which I fear will take some of your valuable time to complete and I have...other tasks I must see to as well.”

“Very well sir.”

“Ok then Harry we have seen a lot about Tom and now the next piece is rather a big one I think. Let’s journey through this one and then talk about it.”

Harry looked at Dumbledore as he lent forward and sort of fell into a trance. He closed his eyes and felt for his magic, he suspected it would be there and was please to find the gentle touch of magic. Gabrielle always seemed to follow him at these lessons, very lightly and he was sure she didn't think he noticed but he had become good at sensing her, he turned back to the swirling memory and let himself go.

**

Harry pulled himself out of the memory as soon as he felt Dumbledore leave. This time he sat back in his chair and calmed his mind. It had been obvious that something had played with as large parts of the memory as it just didn’t seem to fit and it was all to do with Horcruxes. Whatever it was must have been important. He could remember the look in both Professor Slughorns eyes and those of Voldemorts when the question had been asked. He listened to Dumbledore as he put the memory and pensive away but he knew that something very important had happened.

“Well there you have it Harry.”

“Umm.....”

“Deep in thought that is good, so you have some questions I imagine.”

Harry opened his eyes and looked at Dumbledore, he was sitting back in his chair with his hands pressed together waiting.

“What is a Horcrux sir.”

“Straight to the heart, very perceptive of you. It is the result of some of, if not, the most evil magic in existence. It is the process of splitting your soul and placing it somewhere else.”

“Your soul?”

“Yes the very heart of any living thing. A Horcrux is that piece of soul that has been removed and placed somewhere.”

“Why would someone do that?!?” Harry blurted out horrified.

“It’s a good question but not the best you could have asked, I’m sure you could work that one out yourself.”

Harry closed his eyes to try and think this new information through yet the shock still rocked around within him. Images flowed through his mind that all centred on one event the one he didn't want to see: that graveyard!

“Immortality”

“Very good.”

“But Professor Slughorn didn't tell him anything. How could he....” but Harry tailed off.

“But didn't the memory seem strange?” Prompted Dumbledore.

“Well yes sir it was a bit in places, it got fuzzy and everything.”

“Not the best description but accurate Harry. I think we were looking at something that had been modified.”

“Modified?”

“Yes I think Professor Slughorn did tell Tom what he wanted but has changed his memory about it.”

“Why would he....”

“This magic should never be spoken about, that is why for once Hogwarts library failed Tom’s research, and before you try I have made sure, myself, that there is no mention about this in the current selection of books. So this, Harry, is where your homework comes in. I want you to get the original memory form Professor Slughorn. We need to know if Tom did find his information from the Professor or somewhere else.”

“Me sir, but what about you?”

“I find that Horace no longer listens to me as much as I would like, whereas you have something he craves.”

“Power.” Whispered Harry his stomach slightly churning at the thought.

“Crude but correct, see if you can get that memory because without it we cannot continue. I only suspect what has happened but we need to find out the truth Harry.”

“Ok sir.”
“Now, let us see how you have been doing with your perception shall we?” asked Dumbledore, rising to his feet.

Harry nodded, his mind was still thinking through the problem but when he faced the old wizard he suddenly forced his mind to clear. He could think about Slughorn and Horcrux later now he had to concentrate.

“Shield!” barked Dumbledore.

Harry instantly cast his shield but let the magic continue to flow, he focused upon the spell that had left Dumbledore’s wand and then with ease he moved it in the way to slow the speed while moving himself out of the direct path.

“Good! And again!” This time the spell looked faster and more powerful, but Harry managed to shield himself. He calmed his mind and brought his sight forward, a little like seeing the balls at Quidditch it gave him a few more moments to react. Dumbledore started to release a small stream of spells, each travelled straight and there was enough time for Harry to move and he was pleased he block each one of them but suspected that Dumbledore was still going slow with him.

Dumbledore seemed to pause and Harry relaxed slightly but the next spell was released and looked more menacing than any of the others. Harry quickly cast the shield and started to move but the spell more powerful than what he had seen destroyed his shield in an instant. The spell hit his shoulder spinning him around. The next thing he could remember was looking up from the floor into the Headmasters face.

“I wasn’t quick enough.” He said feeling the residual pain in his arm flow away.

“Perception Harry, you have to think differently. In a dual or a fight you have to see things differently.”

“Yes sir.”

“I think I’ve taught you enough about shields Harry. Despite that last one you did very well indeed shall we move onto the next then? We may return when you have thought about your perception and shields.”

“Yes sir?”

“So let us begin ...”

The lesson continued into the nights eventually Dumbledore stopped what he was showing and sat heavily down. Harry saw that the Headmaster looked tired, a soft note trilled round the office and Harry glanced up and saw that sometime during the evening Fawkes had returned unnoticed.

“Age and time gets to us all. Well I think that is enough for now, I have shown you quiet a lot this evening but you need to think on it. Do not try to emulate it but think of perception. Finally, I do not need to tell you to be extremely careful about who you share this information with do I, the Memories and shat I have started to show you? Mr. Weasley and Ms. Granger, have of course earned your trust you can feel free to tell them but be wary of anybody else.”

“Of course sir.”

“Good night Harry.”

“Good night sir.”

**

Harry walked his normal lonely route back to the common room his mind on what spells he had seen. Dumbledore had moved onto differing charms, each one was more complex than the last. Harry had tried a few but found them, at the moment, too hard for him to do yet the Headmaster seemed pleased with what he had managed. His mind knew he was being shown interesting new magic but he was sure that wasn’t the only purpose to the spells.

As the portrait swung open and he climbed in, his mind turned back towards the Horcruxes. Almost a shiver of fear went through him at the thought of sole splitting. The lateness of the hour once more determined that the common room would be empty yet he knew that his two best friends would be waiting. He wasn’t wrong as he saw the pair sitting together both reading. He crossed to them and waited for them to put their books down.

“So learn anything new?” immediately asked Hermione.

“Yes...some things.”

“Well what did you learn then?”

Harry took a steadying breath and then recounted what he had seen and the talk that he had afterwards. Hermione once more had brought out her notes and started to write in them as he spoke but at the end even Harry could see that the news had shocked her.

“It that all you know about them?” she quietly asked.

“Yes, Professor Dumbledore knows more but he said that I need to get that memory first otherwise nothing will make sense.”

“How are you going to do that?”

“I don't know.” Replied Harry rising to his feet and leaving the two behind to think through his problem as well.

**

Harry took the normal route to the room of requirements on Sunday morning, it was not a DA lesson it was just the normal ‘lesson’ that he had with the girls. His mind was full of what Dumbledore had told him the night before and so took little notice of his surroundings. He was also a little surprised that neither Ron nor Hermione had joined him. Since he had offered to show him what he was learning he thought that they might join him but not this morning. When he had mentioned it to them both Hermione and Ron had begged off. Harry was certain that the pair of them had concocted something last night. He suspected that Hermione was going to scour the Library for any reference on the Horcrux, he did not think that she would have any success as Dumbledore had explicitly told him that he had removed all book but that would not stop Hermione looking. What Ron was doing was any guess to Harry, he might be helping her or doing something completely different but it was unusual to be without both of them.

As he turned onto the seventh floor, he saw Luna and Susan waiting. They normally arrived together, not always before Harry and the rest but always together. Harry’s eyes swept over them and took in their appearance but that was all as he was still concentrating on Horcruxes. He stood in front of the blank wall and forced these new thoughts from his mind, he did his normal pacing and pushed open the newly appeared doors. Harry walked in first and looked around, the room looked the same but different. He could not see what was different but something felt very different to him.

The girls followed him in and walked over to the corner they normal used. Harry watched them as they arranged themselves and started on whatever Gabrielle was getting them to do. His mind did not want to concentrate on magic but he forced himself to, he turned to the table that held a number of objects he had been trying out his transfiguration upon. Forcing his mind to work on his magic he drove all other thoughts out and started to practice. It was hard work but slowly he was seeing the fruits of the hours of practice and study from the previous lessons. He was now sure that magic was a more precise art then he had ever believed simple changes of angle in how he moved his wand could produce differing results. The changes were not much but he could discern them all he had to do was see how he could use them.

Eventually he gave up on the transfiguration knowing that he wanted to try something else. He had watched Dumbledore last night when he had cast his spells at his shield and Harry was certain that he knew what the headmaster was doing differently. He wanted to practice that, not transfiguration, that type of spell would be what he used to defeat Voldemort would it? Even though he wanted to practice that spell he didn’t want to do it with the others around. Part of him was shy, he didn’t want to fail in front of these girls but part of him was worried if it went wrong he might hurt or even injure one of them and that thought turned his stomach.

He crossed the room and watched the girls absently, it seemed that each of the girls had their eyes closed and was searching for something. Harry closed his own eyes briefly, slipped into his magic, and looked. This was the first time that he had really looked at them when they had been practicing. The glows of their magical cores seemed bright and the ribbons streaming from them to him were easy but now he could make out more. This time instead of sensing the others magic, he could see it. It was like a small cloud around each one of them. It was hard very hard to spot but he saw it dance around their respective cores and onto the bond. Every so often he felt Gabrielle’s presence as she danced over his magic and so he concentrated upon her, he could almost see her cloud as it flitted along the bond to him and then to the others. It seemed to leap across the small gap and dance lightly over one of the girls before returning to Gabrielle. Harry had to smile, that girl was amazing, she found simple spells hard to do and had such limited magic but in this setting, she was queen, or was she?

Harry let his sight fade as he sank to the floor next to Ginny. He just watched the girl’s faces and was sure he could see when each of them realised that he was near. He continued to watch with his normal eyes and felt his mind wander back to the problems that Dumbledore had given him. Somewhere in his mind he was trying to justify what he was about to do. On the way to this lesson, his subconscious had come up with what he must do but it was against what Dumbledore had asked of him. Dumbledore had asked him only to tell Ron and Hermione about his lessons as they had earned the right to be trusted. Yet, had not these girls earned the right as well? He had told them of the prophecy so why couldn’t they be told the rest. Harry understood that if more people knew then the small advantage, whatever it maybe, could be lost but he could trust these girls couldn’t he. They had earned his trust? Luna had given him something that was so precious, couldn’t he trust her. Ginny stood by him and helped wherever she could, she would never betray him. Gabrielle was showing him this new magic, soothing his worries away. If she was on the other side wouldn’t she be trying to hinder him. Susan was doing everything to help him at school, she never said anything out of turn, never bragged about helping the ‘Chosen One’, she just helped him. So couldn’t he trust them all?

He looked back at the girls and saw that they had all stopped and where looking at him. Suddenly feeling a little self-conscious he felt a blush start to rise.

“You ok?” asked Ginny next to him.

“Um...yes...I was thinking.”

“What about?”

“All of you.”

“Us?” the all asked in unison causing them to giggle.

“Yes whether I can trust you?”

Harry looked at each of their faces; Ginny was by far the easiest to read it almost looked hurt. Luna was her normal blank self as well and Gabrielle she never let anything show, but Susan was the only one that Harry had trouble understanding she looked almost thoughtful.

“Oh.” Responded Ginny.

“Dumbledore has been...instructing me.”

“I know.” Quickly Responded Ginny but Harry saw the look of surprise on Susan.

“He has told me something...he said that I could tell....”

“Ron and Hermione.” Said Luna suddenly.

“Yes, but he felt that no one else should be told. He said that they had earned the right to be trusted.”

“It’s me...you don’t trust us because of my....” said Gabrielle looking down. She knew that her heritage would eventually harm Harry. He had always said that her wings, her heritage didn’t matter but he never looked at her like that. Never looked at her in the way she wanted she was hurt but understood. Harry needed help with something and the others would be that help she had to leave them.

Harry’s mouth dropped open at Gabrielle words but before he could say anything, she gracefully rose to her feet.

“It’s alright I understand...I’ll leave you so that...”

“No it’s not that, please sit down.” Said Harry quickly.

Gabrielle dropped to the ground on Harry words without even thinking about it. Her mind was still trying to process what he had said but her body would always react to his voice.

“No, that hasn’t got anything to do with it. I have thought through what Professor Dumbledore has said and I... I think he’s wrong. I think I can trust you.”

“Of course you can.” Replied Luna for the group.

“Thanks. I think you may want to get comfortable because this may take some time.”

Ginny immediately snuggled a little closer to Harry, she was sure that Gabrielle wanted to do the same but she had checked herself. Glancing across she saw that Luna had moved closer to Susan, the older girl looked shocked but Luna continued until she was leaning against her.

Harry watched all of this but took none of it in. He was organising how and what he was going to say. Eventually he started, he told them everything, everything that he had told Ron and Hermione he told these four girls. When he started, he felt as though he was going against Dumbledore but as he continued he felt relieved, he was doing the right thing, somewhere he knew this to be right.

He looked at each of them as he spoke about Horcruxes he could see the same shock as everyone seemed to have. At the end, he waited for their reaction and questions but they said nothing. He could feel the gentle stroking of Ginny’s hand upon his, he didn’t know when that had started but it felt comforting. His other hand could almost feel Gabrielle’s, it was so close he almost wanted to reach out to it but he still checked himself.

“Well I think you need to get that memory.” Said Luna eventually.

“I know but I don’t know where to start.”

“I may be able to help.” Ventured Susan timidly.

“You can?”

“Yes I think between us we can get that memory. It might mean an appearance or two at one of his clubs but you should be able to get it.”

“Well I could try but I’m not really very good at that type of thing, you how I was in the train carriage, I’m just not…comfortable.”

Susan glanced very nervously at both Ginny and Gabrielle. Ginny was Harry’s girlfriend and Gabrielle, well she wanted that and more, but how could she suggest what was going through her mind with those two here? Luna would understand there was something between them but what about Ginny and Gabrielle?

Gabrielle looked into Susan’s eyes, she had not felt much from the girl through their lessons but now it was as if she could sense, her nervousness and unease. She was about to speak when Ginny broke the silence.

“It’s alright Susan say it. I think I know what you are going to suggest.”

Susan steadied herself but still looked nervously at Ginny as she spoke.

“I could go with Harry. Professor Slughorn wants me there as well, I know I can handle him especially if-with Harry there.” Susan dropped her head at the brazen statement and the implied suggestion.

Harry wanted to agree, but the good boyfriend part of him made him stay silent. He cautiously looked at Ginny.

“Great idea Susan and you can look after him for the rest of us. I’m sure that there would be...others there that might want to...but you’ll look after him for us right?”

Susan’s face lit up and she understood that both Ginny, and by the way Gabrielle was smiling, that they had accepted her near Harry and to look after him when they could not be around.

“Yes, with my heart, yes...”she turned back to Harry before continuing “... We, we could start by going to his Christmas party or the first one back in the New Year.”

“You sure it will work?”

“No, but it’s worth a try.”

“What can the rest of us do?” asked Ginny.

“I don’t think there is anything we can do for the moment, we just have to help Harry where we can.” Replied Luna for Harry.

They all sat in silence for a moment before Susan started to rise to her feet. “I’ll start now, I’ll see if I can find anything more about Professor Slughorn that we can use.”

Luna rose with her as well. “I think I’ll see if any of Daddies book mentions anything. I don’t think there is anything but there might be.” She closed the gap to Harry and before he could do anything she bent and gave him a brief peck on the cheek. Harry was about to say something but Luna just said “Thank you.” And turned and walked towards the door.

Susan too started too walked towards the doors but stopped and stood before Harry.

“Yes thank you for trusting me...us.” then she too bend quickly and gave him a very chaste kiss on the cheek before she turned and caught up with Luna. Ginny smiled when she saw this and to her it seemed a perfect opportunity for one other. She rubbed his hand a final time causing him to look at her and not the retreating girls. She gave him a quick kiss, not on the cheek but the lips before she too rose.

“I need to look at some of my homework, see you two later.” She said as she walked out leaving Harry alone with Gabrielle. Harry turned towards Gabrielle and was a bit apprehensive, something about the setting or how he was feeling made this seem so different to any other time.

“Thank you Harry...”she started to say, without looking up.

“Gabrielle, I trust you I really do, your...”

Gabrielle could not hold it anymore, it was dangerous but she was sure she could control her desire but she had to do it anyway. Ginny had given her the opportunity and she just had to take it. She flung her arms around Harry and pulled him close. Her body almost melted at this touch but she forced herself to keep everything under control. With supreme effort she managed it but she could not stay like this for much longer before she lost herself, she closed the gap between her lips and his and pressed. Not hard not wanting but lightly, gently, as only she could. Emotions boiled with her as she felt his lips, she wanted to let those emotions go but could not; she just had to luxuriate in this moment and wait for the next time. She could feel the tears start to form and so released Harry; she couldn’t bear his touch any longer without acting upon it.

“Thank you Harry you mean...” but the little girl inside of her didn't allow her to finish before she fled the room.

Harry watched her go, every part of his body was on fire, the kiss had been unexpected, he felt the sudden attack on his emotion and on his will. She had told him the touching was dangerous so he had slammed his defence down hard to protect both of them, sadness overwhelmed him when he had done so but he was sure he had done the right thing. Yet when her lips had touched his he felt his resolve weaken, he wanted to hold her, touch her, explore her. However, she had broken it off and then departed. He felt so alone as she left him. He had wanted to call out to ask her to stay but he dared not for if she had done so where would it have ended.

Calming his emotions, he rose to his feet and looked about the room. Forcing everything that had just happened away for the moment, he drew his wand. They would be safe, he would make sure of it, he had to practice that spell because that might save their lives.

**