Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > Skeptics and True Believers
Taylor’s POV
I had barely knocked the door when I heard the stumbles on the floor and the door opened quickly. I chuckled.
“You… you…” William said trying to look mad. It didn’t work. “Get in.”
I rolled my eyes. “Hi, I was just passing by and decided to--” I couldn’t finish whatever I was going to say, cause William nearly jumped on me and kissed me forcefully.
“Whatever…” He mumbled against my lips and kept kissing me. I smirked and pulled away.
“Aren’t we eager?”
“I thought you wouldn’t come.” He said attacking my lips again, his hand tugging the bottom of my shirt. I squirmed out of his grasp and pushed him away. “What?”
“Nothing.” I said smirking. “It’s good to see you like this. Makes me feel… important.” I smiled and he smiled back.
“Whatever I said, I’m sorry.” He apologized, trailing little kisses on my neck and his hands under my shirt. “I know I’m not really fair with you sometimes. But I want you to want to be here.”
William stared at me for a few seconds before we both pulled our shirts off and kissed forcefully and hard again. He walked backwards to the bed while peeling my bra and unbuckling both jeans. He turned us around and literally dropped me on the bed, pulling my boots and jeans off, kissing his way up. My breath was starting to get ragged and I just stared at him as he lost his own pants and crawled on top of me, staring hungrily. It made me all hot to see him like that, cause I knew it was me who made him like that. Even if it was out of lust and nothing else, I liked it. Made it feel like he wanted me as much as I wanted him.
As the last of our clothes slid down and off, I managed to roll us over and straddle his hips, teasing him and keeping him down by pushing his shoulders to the bed. His hands gripped my hips, trying to move me, move himself inside. But I wouldn’t let him.
“C’mon, Taylor!” He whined, bucking his hips up.
I leaned down and licked his lips. “You think you’ve earned it?” William groaned.
“Want me to beg?” He pleaded and I nodded. “Please, please, [i]please[/i], Taylor.”
I smiled a little and allowed him to pull me down for a kiss, his hips still bucking up and rubbing against mine. I pulled away momentarily, adjusting my hips on top of his…
And then…
The phone starts ringing.
“Motherfuck!” He yelled as I retrieved from his lap. “Nononono… come back!” He said gripping my hips and pulling me back on top. But the phone kept ringing and I was starting to recognize the ring tone.
I sighed. “You better get that one. After all it’s not like her to call you at 4 in the morning.”
William grunted, cursed and spit while scrambling with his clothes, one hand still on my hip to keep me there. He didn’t even look at the phone when he snapped it open and clicked not the answer button, but the speaker one. I knew that when the sobbing voice of Christine flooded the hotel room. William just groaned and dropped his head on the pillow, making no attempt to shut the phone down.
“I’m sorry! I know it’s like 4 am there, but--” Christine sobbed and sniffled again. I rolled my eyes and leaned down to kiss him when she spoke again. “I’m- I’m pregnant, Bill…” She said breaking in tears. I froze staring right at him for like half a second before I scrambled off the bed.
His eyes bulged out as he reached for the phone and turned the speaker off, talking and asking things I didn’t catch. It wasn’t important. All that mattered is that I had to get out of there, so I dressed in a flash, even when William was trying to hold my arms and my wrists still on the phone.
“Wait, wait, wait Taylor, don’t go.” He whispered, covering the receiver with one hand.
I just bit my tongue and ignored him, pulling my shirt over my head and looking for my shoes. I was so mad I could have taken that phone and shove it up his ass.
“Damn it…” He muttered, going back to the phone. “Christine, honey, look. I’ll call you first thing in the morning, Okay? Okay… yeah… me too…” The phone was closed with a click and thrown on the bed at the same time I found my purse. “Where are you going? Don’t go. C’mon… Taylor…” William chased me and blocked my way.
“Just…” I sighed. “You better take care of that.” I walked around him, going for the door. “Congratulations, by the way.”
William sighed heavily and scratched the back of his head following me. “So, you’re just going to walk out on me, Taylor? Come on...” I stopped when he blocked my way again, looking at me pleadingly. “You think I wanted this?”
“I don’t know… I don’t care for that matter. All I know is that [i]I[/i] don’t want it.” I took a deep breath before continuing. “What do you want, William? You want things to be the same? Wanna keep going with this? How far do you wanna take it?”
I watched him shift his feet and bite his lip “I… don’t know… but I… I couldn’t leave her alone now…”
“And it seems you couldn’t when we were in Chicago either.” I said shaking my head and blinking fast. I wasn’t going to cry for this, let alone in front of him. “Yeah… you can’t leave her alone. I have to go.”
“Taylor…” He sighed again, but I didn’t turn. “What do you want me to say?”
I bit my lip again. “Nothing. Told you this could stop when I wanted and I want it to stop now. Nothing you say is going to change that.” I turned and leaned on the door. His staring eyes looking sad.
“So it’s over? Just like that?”
I nodded. “Yes.” We stood there in silence, I was staring at the floor trying to gather strength to walk away, but my will was barely enough to prevent me from crying.
“Tay…” He said getting closer and then stopping and nodding. “If you want me to let you go… I’ll let you go.”
Truth is I didn’t want him to let me go, I wanted him to stop me. “If-- we just-- if you…” I looked at him and held my breath. “Nevermind. It’s over.”
I turned away and walked out, quickly shutting the door and nearly sprinting down the hall. I felt my eyes welling up and the tears bursting out. Next thing I knew I was hunched on the floor bawling my eyes out and must have been doing so for a good five minutes. I know I said I wasn’t crying over this, but it was stronger than me. Besides I was alone and I felt like a needed it: to have a good nice cry. And once I did all I had left was this empty space inside my chest: no more hopes, no more tears, no more him, no more anything really. At least for now…
I stood up and wiped my face, not really knowing what to do. I knew Nat was with Carden and I wasn’t in the mood to interrupt. Besides, going back to my room would mean lots of explaining and possibly more tears, I wanted to avoid both at the moment. I had at least 4 hours of doing nothing, so I started walking slowly down the hall thinking about going up to the rooftop. Heights always calmed me down. I waited for the elevator to reach my floor and when the doors opened, there he was.
Ryan.
“Hey, what are you doing up so late?” He asked with a smile. I tried to smile too, but I couldn’t.
“Nothing… I could ask you the same thing though.” I tried to hide my face in the dim light. I didn’t succeed.
“Are you okay? You look like you’ve been crying.” He said worriedly and rubbed my arm.
“I’m fine… just…” I stopped cause, really, what the fuck is wrong with me that I wanna cry again?
“It’s okay… it’s okay.” Ryan soothed me stepping a little closer. “Umm… want me to take you to your room?”
I shook my head. “Nat is… busy.”
“Oh.” I took a deep breath swallowing my tears back in. Ryan held my arms. “C’mon, you look like you need to lie down. I’ll take you to my room.”
“Ryan, I really appreciate it…” I started shaking my head again.
“Taylor. You have no room to go to, right? Where are you planning to sleep?” He said with a half smile. “I think I can give up my bed for the night. C’mon.”
It took me a couple of seconds to accept his invite. But I did, he was right I had nowhere else to go. Once in his room, we entered quietly and he told me to use the bed after stealing a pillow and a blanket. I thought it would take me forever to fall asleep, but surprisingly it took only a couple of minutes for sleep to claim me.
I had barely knocked the door when I heard the stumbles on the floor and the door opened quickly. I chuckled.
“You… you…” William said trying to look mad. It didn’t work. “Get in.”
I rolled my eyes. “Hi, I was just passing by and decided to--” I couldn’t finish whatever I was going to say, cause William nearly jumped on me and kissed me forcefully.
“Whatever…” He mumbled against my lips and kept kissing me. I smirked and pulled away.
“Aren’t we eager?”
“I thought you wouldn’t come.” He said attacking my lips again, his hand tugging the bottom of my shirt. I squirmed out of his grasp and pushed him away. “What?”
“Nothing.” I said smirking. “It’s good to see you like this. Makes me feel… important.” I smiled and he smiled back.
“Whatever I said, I’m sorry.” He apologized, trailing little kisses on my neck and his hands under my shirt. “I know I’m not really fair with you sometimes. But I want you to want to be here.”
William stared at me for a few seconds before we both pulled our shirts off and kissed forcefully and hard again. He walked backwards to the bed while peeling my bra and unbuckling both jeans. He turned us around and literally dropped me on the bed, pulling my boots and jeans off, kissing his way up. My breath was starting to get ragged and I just stared at him as he lost his own pants and crawled on top of me, staring hungrily. It made me all hot to see him like that, cause I knew it was me who made him like that. Even if it was out of lust and nothing else, I liked it. Made it feel like he wanted me as much as I wanted him.
As the last of our clothes slid down and off, I managed to roll us over and straddle his hips, teasing him and keeping him down by pushing his shoulders to the bed. His hands gripped my hips, trying to move me, move himself inside. But I wouldn’t let him.
“C’mon, Taylor!” He whined, bucking his hips up.
I leaned down and licked his lips. “You think you’ve earned it?” William groaned.
“Want me to beg?” He pleaded and I nodded. “Please, please, [i]please[/i], Taylor.”
I smiled a little and allowed him to pull me down for a kiss, his hips still bucking up and rubbing against mine. I pulled away momentarily, adjusting my hips on top of his…
And then…
The phone starts ringing.
“Motherfuck!” He yelled as I retrieved from his lap. “Nononono… come back!” He said gripping my hips and pulling me back on top. But the phone kept ringing and I was starting to recognize the ring tone.
I sighed. “You better get that one. After all it’s not like her to call you at 4 in the morning.”
William grunted, cursed and spit while scrambling with his clothes, one hand still on my hip to keep me there. He didn’t even look at the phone when he snapped it open and clicked not the answer button, but the speaker one. I knew that when the sobbing voice of Christine flooded the hotel room. William just groaned and dropped his head on the pillow, making no attempt to shut the phone down.
“I’m sorry! I know it’s like 4 am there, but--” Christine sobbed and sniffled again. I rolled my eyes and leaned down to kiss him when she spoke again. “I’m- I’m pregnant, Bill…” She said breaking in tears. I froze staring right at him for like half a second before I scrambled off the bed.
His eyes bulged out as he reached for the phone and turned the speaker off, talking and asking things I didn’t catch. It wasn’t important. All that mattered is that I had to get out of there, so I dressed in a flash, even when William was trying to hold my arms and my wrists still on the phone.
“Wait, wait, wait Taylor, don’t go.” He whispered, covering the receiver with one hand.
I just bit my tongue and ignored him, pulling my shirt over my head and looking for my shoes. I was so mad I could have taken that phone and shove it up his ass.
“Damn it…” He muttered, going back to the phone. “Christine, honey, look. I’ll call you first thing in the morning, Okay? Okay… yeah… me too…” The phone was closed with a click and thrown on the bed at the same time I found my purse. “Where are you going? Don’t go. C’mon… Taylor…” William chased me and blocked my way.
“Just…” I sighed. “You better take care of that.” I walked around him, going for the door. “Congratulations, by the way.”
William sighed heavily and scratched the back of his head following me. “So, you’re just going to walk out on me, Taylor? Come on...” I stopped when he blocked my way again, looking at me pleadingly. “You think I wanted this?”
“I don’t know… I don’t care for that matter. All I know is that [i]I[/i] don’t want it.” I took a deep breath before continuing. “What do you want, William? You want things to be the same? Wanna keep going with this? How far do you wanna take it?”
I watched him shift his feet and bite his lip “I… don’t know… but I… I couldn’t leave her alone now…”
“And it seems you couldn’t when we were in Chicago either.” I said shaking my head and blinking fast. I wasn’t going to cry for this, let alone in front of him. “Yeah… you can’t leave her alone. I have to go.”
“Taylor…” He sighed again, but I didn’t turn. “What do you want me to say?”
I bit my lip again. “Nothing. Told you this could stop when I wanted and I want it to stop now. Nothing you say is going to change that.” I turned and leaned on the door. His staring eyes looking sad.
“So it’s over? Just like that?”
I nodded. “Yes.” We stood there in silence, I was staring at the floor trying to gather strength to walk away, but my will was barely enough to prevent me from crying.
“Tay…” He said getting closer and then stopping and nodding. “If you want me to let you go… I’ll let you go.”
Truth is I didn’t want him to let me go, I wanted him to stop me. “If-- we just-- if you…” I looked at him and held my breath. “Nevermind. It’s over.”
I turned away and walked out, quickly shutting the door and nearly sprinting down the hall. I felt my eyes welling up and the tears bursting out. Next thing I knew I was hunched on the floor bawling my eyes out and must have been doing so for a good five minutes. I know I said I wasn’t crying over this, but it was stronger than me. Besides I was alone and I felt like a needed it: to have a good nice cry. And once I did all I had left was this empty space inside my chest: no more hopes, no more tears, no more him, no more anything really. At least for now…
I stood up and wiped my face, not really knowing what to do. I knew Nat was with Carden and I wasn’t in the mood to interrupt. Besides, going back to my room would mean lots of explaining and possibly more tears, I wanted to avoid both at the moment. I had at least 4 hours of doing nothing, so I started walking slowly down the hall thinking about going up to the rooftop. Heights always calmed me down. I waited for the elevator to reach my floor and when the doors opened, there he was.
Ryan.
“Hey, what are you doing up so late?” He asked with a smile. I tried to smile too, but I couldn’t.
“Nothing… I could ask you the same thing though.” I tried to hide my face in the dim light. I didn’t succeed.
“Are you okay? You look like you’ve been crying.” He said worriedly and rubbed my arm.
“I’m fine… just…” I stopped cause, really, what the fuck is wrong with me that I wanna cry again?
“It’s okay… it’s okay.” Ryan soothed me stepping a little closer. “Umm… want me to take you to your room?”
I shook my head. “Nat is… busy.”
“Oh.” I took a deep breath swallowing my tears back in. Ryan held my arms. “C’mon, you look like you need to lie down. I’ll take you to my room.”
“Ryan, I really appreciate it…” I started shaking my head again.
“Taylor. You have no room to go to, right? Where are you planning to sleep?” He said with a half smile. “I think I can give up my bed for the night. C’mon.”
It took me a couple of seconds to accept his invite. But I did, he was right I had nowhere else to go. Once in his room, we entered quietly and he told me to use the bed after stealing a pillow and a blanket. I thought it would take me forever to fall asleep, but surprisingly it took only a couple of minutes for sleep to claim me.
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