FicWad

=/\=Disclaimer: I own nothing but my own characters; everything belongs to Tolkien the genius.

=/\= Warning: A character death is included in this chapter. Don't blame me, it was mentioned in one sentence in the Silmarillion.


Chapter Seven: Núrunna i Helcaraxë

"There is no other way to pass but over the ice," Finrod said to his companions. "All of the north is surrounded by it and no stable land is visible for us to cross over."

Fingolfin grimaced for a moment as his nephew informed him of the perils lying before them on their continuing path to the Hither Lands. After discovering the betrayal of Fëanor and his sons, Fingolfin felt bitter rage build within himself and knew there was no turning back anymore. He would meet his brother again in the eastern lands to confront him one day.

The pain of the treachery burned strongly within him as well as his sons and his niece, Artanis. They all came together to show the final assembly of Noldor that they would not leave them to die like Fëanor and his kin had. There was still some strength left in his followers and they believed in him as their king to lead them to a better place. He vowed to himself he would bring them there.

"Then we will have to cross the Helcaraxë to come into the eastern lands," Fingolfin determined. "We have come so far already but I have faith we will make it safely."

Fingon and Finrod nodded in unison at his decision as did Artanis.

"We shall follow you, father, wherever you will go," Turgon added.

Fingolfin attempted a warm smile to his following relatives, feeling somewhat heartened that they supported him at this time. If they had not, he did not know how he would have been able to go on.

"For several hours we will rest here. When everyone has eaten and rested, we will take the last leg of our journey across the hills of ice," he explained. "It may take a couple days to cross but we should not stop at all because the ice is mysterious and dangerous. It would not be safe to stay too long in one place."

The council of elves nodded and then dismissed themselves as they went about their duties to prepare food or take rest. Fingolfin stood and looked over the Noldor huddled close together for warmth. Frost clung to their dark, sable locks and they shivered against the cold wind that blew harshly from the far north. He turned away finally to gather what he needed for their most important part of the journey.

Turgon came upon where he left his wife Elenwë with Idril and Elrilya and found them huddled close, already attempting to sleep in the frigid cold. He was about to settle with them when he noticed a lone figure sitting upon a large rock not far away, green eyes watching him from underneath a hood.

"Glorfindel, you may come lay with us to keep warm. You need not be by yourself," Turgon said when he realized who the figure was.

"It is all right, Turgon," he answered. "I have not the need to sleep just yet."

"You haven't slept in many days," Turgon said, a sound of worry in his voice. "You should at least try so that you will have enough energy to cross the ice tomorrow."

"It is decided then," Glorfindel said with a sigh. "Perhaps you are right but I fear the darkness of sleep will not come upon me so easily."

"What ails you?" Turgon said as he kneeled in front of his friend.

"What do you mean?" Glorfindel replied.

"You have not been yourself as of late," Turgon said with a shake of his head. "Quiet pondering is not your way. You have not talked with me as you usually do."

Glorfindel's eyes flashed as he set them upon his close companion.

"This is something I must decide and think about with myself only," he said solemnly. "I'm sorry if that does not satisfy your worries but that is all I have to offer for now."

Turgon sighed, "If you ever do feel like discussing it with me, just let me know."

Glorfindel watched as Turgon made his way back to his family and settled down beside Elenwë and pulled himself closer to her so that he could hold her in a warm embrace. Idril slept soundly on her mother's other side and Elrilya on the other end was a dark shadow hidden within her cloak on the other end of the family, standing out somewhat from the light-haired mother and daughter.

Even though Turgon had been born with the dark hair of his father's Noldorian line, his hair was lighter than the average Noldor elf. His Vanyar blood, mixed with Elenwë's, certainly influenced the touch of golden blond in Idril's appearance. But Elrilya stood out from the three of them. To Glorfindel, she seemed very alone despite the comfort and support surrounding her.


Glorfindel sat alone upon his perch, a shiver coursing through him now and again that he was unable to hold back. The harsh wind from the north had died down to nothingness and so he continued to stare out into the white fog that hung solidly and thickly around the camp. He let his head drop upon his knees as he held his legs close to his body to keep the warmth in. He was content to stay in the position until he heard almost silent footsteps stop beside him. He looked up from his curled position to find Elrilya standing next to him beside the rock.

"Are you not able to sleep?" he asked, a white cloud of his breath appearing in front of his nose and mouth as he spoke.

She shook her head no and then said, "I wish to sleep but I do not want to see the images again."

Glorfindel looked at her curiously. This was the first time he had heard her speak since the Kinslaying many days before.

"What images?" he asked her as he motioned for her to sit next to him on the rock.

"My dreams show them all dying," she said softly once she had sat down.

"At Alqualondë?" he asked.

"Yes," she answered, a shudder running through her body but it was not from the cold. "I see my parents, too."

"Don't dwell on those thoughts," Glorfindel said as he turned to face his body to her.

"I do not want to," she said, a small sob breaking her voice. "But I cannot help but think about not being able to help them or save them."

Glorfindel paused as he noticed she was feeling overwhelmed by her grief once more. Though, this grief was becoming harmful to her because she was attempting to place blame on herself for her parents' deaths.

"There was nothing you could have done to stop it," he said, attempting to console her. "Fëanor led them into death, not you."

She shook her head, "I was supposed to be with them, I should never have left them."

Glorfindel then realized what she was speaking of. He opened his cloak and pulled her closer to him within it so that he could try to get through to her but also to show her she need not be alone.

"Do not blame yourself for not being with them," he said softly. "You may believe that you were not within their company enough in life but your parents will want you to remain happy and safe. They would not have wanted you to be with them in Alqualondë where you most certainly would have met death with them. They know now you are alive and safe with Idril. I am sure that comforts them and that they are gladdened to know you are surrounded by those who care for you."

Elrilya nodded slowly then laid her head upon his shoulder within the curve of his arm around her own shoulder. Glorfindel closed his eyes and took a deep breath as he leaned his own head upon hers. He felt some relief at being able to make her understand. If only he could keep her from these feelings of hurt.

"Please, sing me a song," she whispered.

"As you wish," he said, a little surprised by the request but sympathetic of her wanting to feel in a safe and comfortable place.

He kept his voice low as to not wake the others around them and began a small melody. She remained silent as he went through each verse singing softly into her ear. After he finished, Glorfindel thought he noticed Elrilya crying again. He was right in his assumption when he saw her move a hand to wipe the frozen tears away from her face.

"What is the matter, Elrilya?" he whispered, somewhat worried what came upon her now.

"Nothing," she sniffled. "It's just... when I was young, Atar used to sing that song to me before I would go to bed."

Glorfindel felt as if he had become dizzy and would fall from the rock they sat upon. He had not meant to remind her of memories that coincided with her family.

He inwardly kicked himself as he said, "I'm sorry, I did not mean to..."

"Do not apologize," she cut him off. "You sang it like he once did. I like that."

Still feeling guilt for inadvertently bringing her back to her parents, Glorfindel said nothing but kept her close to him so that she knew he was there for her if she needed to talk.

"Sing another, please," she asked. "If you do not mind."

"Not at all," he replied and began another soft song flowing into her ear.

Before long, Elrilya had fallen into a calm slumber next to him. When he was sure she was completely asleep, he carefully carried her back to where Turgon and his family lay and placed her beside them. Though, this time, he stayed sitting close to her sleeping form.


The Noldor marched on together across the fields of seemingly unending ice as they traveled to reach the Hither Lands. After a day's worth of walking, their numbers were fewer due to several unfortunate deaths. Many fell into the cold waters beneath when the ice unexpectedly broke beneath them as they journeyed slowly. Now, with utmost care and anxiety, the followers of Fingolfin carried on.

"We should be to the other side soon enough, I believe," said Ecthelion, Turgon's trusted captain of his royal guard. "The scouts who had gone on ahead gave reports that we should have no more than fifteen hours left if we stay at this pace."

"That is the best news we have heard in some time," Fingolfin said as they walked at the rear of the group.

"Fingon said he would send word back if he comes upon anything up ahead," Ecthelion added on, mentioning Fingolfin's son leading the way at the front.

"We shall be out of this soon enough," Turgon said with some enthusiasm. "Then we can leave this coldness behind us."

"I think everyone is in agreement with that," Glorfindel chuckled.

Breaking off from the group at that point, Turgon went along with Glorfindel a little ahead of his father and captain who continued to discuss plans.

"I see you are beginning to act like yourself again," Turgon mentioned.

"There is still much to be determined," Glorfindel said. "But I feel the weight of my problems lifting as we near our destination."

"That is heartening to hear," Turgon said and then motioned ahead and off to the side where Idril and Elrilya were walking together just behind Aredhel and Elenwë. "I see she is in better spirits finally. Elenwë was worried about her health if Elrilya did not open up again."

"I believe things are on the mend for her," Glorfindel said as he thought about her confiding in him not long ago.

"Idril seemed to know all along it seems," Turgon said as he took his eyes off the two maidens' heads close together in conversation.

A sound of cracking ice sprang up nearby and everyone stopped in sudden fear. The splitting ice sounds had echoed across the air preceding the collapse of ice and the following deaths of the Noldor so now all began to panic as they searched for where the ice would next give way.

Elrilya felt a rush of air and suddenly she was enveloped by an overwhelming coldness surrounding her. She had not the chance to catch her breath before falling into the dark water beneath the ice she had been walking on. She felt herself falling further but she could see nothing nor could she tell which way was up or down. Idril had been right at her side moment before and now there was a void. Her lungs burned for air and she opened her mouth instinctually but only received cold water into her mouth instead. Elrilya felt the suffocating iciness work up her limbs that were beginning to feel numb.

It felt like she had been under the water for so long already and she felt the creeping emptiness of death coming upon her as she tried to thrash her freezing body in one direction to the next. A strange golden brightness suddenly hovered above her and she perceived someone's urgent emotions over her as that person searched. Then it disappeared as suddenly as it had appeared.

No! Not like this. It's not my time!

Finding one last bit of energy within her, Elrilya kicked as hard as she could and moved her arms as if to pull herself up through the water. She felt the rising of her body and she knew she was nearing the surface. The chill of the air hit her like thousands of stinging needles upon her skin and Elrilya screamed out as her lungs surged with much needed air. She thrust her arms out of the water as she struggled to find an edge to hold onto but her wet, dark hair blocked most of her vision. But she realized she need not panic much more as she felt a strong hand grip her own.

"Elrilya! You need to hold onto my arm tightly!" Glorfindel called out to her. "We're going to pull you back onto the ice, don't let go!"

Holding on securely to his warm hand, she felt herself hauled onto the thicker ice as others pulled Glorfindel and herself from the hole where she had fallen through. A few blankets were thrown around her as she felt the cold through her wet clothing. Searching about with her eyes, she saw Ecthelion carrying a drenched and shivering Idril not far from where they both had been walking not too long before. Several others had managed to escape the cracking ice in time but a few others had fallen in as well and had not surfaced. Aredhel had narrowly missed the cracking ice but next to her, Elenwë had not been as lucky. Turgon would have thrown himself into the icy depths if Glorfindel had not come and held him back.

"She's out there still!" Turgon panicked. "Elenwë! Let me go! I need to find her!"

"If you go in there too, you might not come back!" Glorfindel said. "Stay with Idril, she needs you right now! Don't leave her alone. We will try to find Elenwë."

Turgon finally relented but turned hesitantly back to the gaping whole of black, churning water. He came to Idril and held her close as Glorfindel, Fingolfin, and Ecthelion continued to canvas the edges of the ice, looking for a sign of the golden haired elf. After several hours of searching, she never surfaced and nothing could be found of her.

With a heavy heart, Turgon took his daughter into his arms, wrapping her in blankets to remain warm against him. Glorfindel followed in suit and took up a shaking Elrilya as the Noldor continued their traveling to the Hither Lands.

Glossary
Núrunna i Helcaraxë: death on the Helcaraxë
Atar: father