FicWad

“Reno! Reno, wake up! Come on, there’s a woman down there, maybe she knows where we are and how we got here.” Tseng said, shaking the redhead awake.

“Yeah, so? Whadda ya want me to do about it?” Reno grumbled, rolling over to better lift himself from the ground..

“Get up!” Cloud and Tseng shouted at the same time.

“She’s coming this way. I think we should just wait for her to get here. I mean, why waste our energy on a stupid human girl?” Loz stated, stretching his leather-clad legs out in the loose sand.

“Hey Kadaj, wanna keep your dogs on a leash?” Rude said, curling his lip into a snarl.

“Why you…” Loz said taking a threatening step toward him.

“Hey, we’re in this together, remember? We can kill each other once we’re back where we belong! Until then: Rude, behave yourself.” Rufus said calmly.

“He’s right,” Cloud said, “We need to figure out what to do right now, and we need to do it fast. That woman is going to be too far past us very soon.”

“I’ll get her.” Yazoo said, standing from the driftwood that he had claimed as ‘his’ seat.

“No no, I need to work off some energy, I’ll go.” Kadaj interrupted. Without another word, Kadaj leapt from the cover of the tall foliage that hid the group and slid down the bluff to the beach below. He landed gracefully in front of the woman.

She let out a startled gasp and then backed up a step. “Can I help you?” She asked, irritated.

“Oh yes, yes you can.” Kadaj stepped toward her.

She stepped back.

“You’re coming with me.” Kadaj said, as if the woman had no right to argue with him.

“Haha, very funny creeper, did someone forget to take his crazy pills this morning?”

Kadaj growled and lunged at her.


She put up a hell of a fight, managing to impress even those watching from the bluff top by landing an elbow to the youngest clone’s jaw.

Unfortunately, that was not enough. Kadaj lunged at her again, done playing, and effectively grabbed her. He threw her over his shoulder-despite her screaming in his ear and bruising his back with her delicate little fists-and jumped gracefully back up the cliffside.

Once he landed, he dropped the still-struggling woman on her behind in the dirt. She stood up, cursing and spitting, before noticing the other men around her.

“Oh dear God, I’m about to be gang-raped, aren’t I?” She wailed.

“Relax Ma’am, we just want to talk to you.” Rufus said, leaning forward in his wheelchair.

“Oh right!” the woman said. “I’m warning you, I’m a black belt!” She took the Drunken Fist stance.

“Reeeally?” Yazoo crooned, standing up and falling into a mirrored pose.

The woman stood up straight, bowing her head and looking embarrassed. “Oh…I was hoping that would discourage you…”

“Please Miss,” Cloud said, “We really do just want to talk. We need some help. Please just hear us out?”

“And if I refuse?” She asked defiantly.

“We kill you and look elsewhere.” Kadaj stated bluntly. No one argued.

The woman sighed and stared at her feet. After a moment, she nodded her head. “Alright. I’m listening.”

“Good.” Rufus said, smiling. “First of all, what may we call you?”

“Harmony…Or Hari for short.”

“Well, Hari, it seems my comrades and I have landed in quite the predicament…”