Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Can't Be Saved
"Frank! Frank!" I heard someone shout, but its muffled. I try and open my eyes but everything is just so blurry. I can't see anything except three figures hovering over me. I blinked a few times before my name was being called again. "Frank! Frankie?!"
"Hmm." I managed to make a noise.
"Thank god you're alive, you stupid FUCK!" I realized it was Jeph when he slapped me and called me a stupid fuck.
"For fuck sake, Jeph," I said holding my cheek and trying to sit up only to become really dizzy and to have to grab my head to get the room to stop spinning. "What happened?" I asked.
"You're an idiot that's what happened. You shot to much up and passed out. You always do that shit after I get you off," Jeph said standing up with his arms crossed.
"Whatever, I do not."
"Yes you do, and I always think you fucking killed yourself," Jeph said kicking me in the leg.
"What's he doing here?" I asked pointing to Gerard.
"He's paid to have you tonight," said Jim.
"What?"
"He has paid to rent you for the night. Ya know we do that here, remember?" Jim said in a voice that made me sound stupid.
"Yeah, I know, but he's been following me ever since yesterday or something. I don't know, but he's been following me, and it's creeping me out," I said to Jim.
"Well that's to bad, Frank. You don't have a choice unless you wanna quit," Jim said looking at me .
Gerard reached over and started to help me up, I snatched my arm out of his hand.
"Don't touch me," I said angrily. "You don't own me till 10pm, and it's only 9."
"Okay. Well me me at this address at 10," Gerard said pulling a piece of paper of of his pocket and handing it to me.
"Sure thing, chief," I said smiling and standing up. I looked over at Jeph as Gerard turned to leave. "You still have some of that captain left?" I asked.
"Yeah, sure do," he said to me as he slipped on his pants.
"Good, I'm gonna need it," I said walking over and sitting down on Jeph's bench.
"Dude, I don't think it will be that bad. I thought you like doing that kinda stuff 'cause you make a lot of money?"
"I do. It's just he has been following me around, and it kinda creeps me out," I said standing up and grabbing my bag to go out back with Jeph. Once we made it to our spot out back, I took the bottle from Jeph's hands and chugged. "What do you think will happen?" I asked.
"I don't know man. He seems like a good person. I don't think it will be like last time," he answered.
"Oh God! I didn't even think about that. Shit."
Ya see last time someone 'bought' me for the night, I nearly ended up in the hospital. The guy had tied me to the bed and nearly beat me to death while he fucked me. I had never been so scared in my life. Jeph had found me that morning in the hotel room bloodied and scared. I wouldn't let him take me to the hospital. I hate hospitals.
"It will be ok dude," he said putting his hand on my shoulder.
"I hope so. I can't go through that again," I said taking a big gulp.
**
I showed up at Gerard's place right when i was supposed to, but I couldn't knock on the door. I was too nervous. But just when I was about to say fuck it and leave the door opened.
"Frank?" Gerard said standing the staring at me.
"Um....hi," I said shyly. I hated this. I hated this feeling.
"Come in," he said standing to the side.
"Um....ok," I said looking up and down the hallway of the apartment building. I stepped inside and felt like I was going to throw up. I should just leave.
"You want anything? Coffee? Food?" he asked. I just stared at him not knowing what to say. "I'll make some coffee then," he said, turning and going into the kitchen. I just stood there not knowing what to do or how to act. Gerard came back with two cups of coffee. I'm still in the same place I was before.
"Have a seat," he said, motioning to the couch. I just did as I was told, clutching my bag in my hands. "You don't have to be so nervous. I'm not going to do anything to you," Gerard said as he sipped his coffee.
"I, um, I just--" I had no idea what I was doing, and all I wanted was a hit or a drink or something.
"It's okay, Frankie. You don't have to be scared. I'm not going to hurt you or anything," he said looking at me as I clutched my bag.
"Can I use your bathroom?" I asked, feeling sick.
"Yeah, it's the first door on the left," he said, pointing to the hallway.
"Thanks," I said practically running to the bathroom and closing the door behind me. Shit. What am I doing here? He's going to hurt me just like everyone else. I rummaged through my bag and found my stash. I pulled out everything I needed and got it ready, lighting the lighter and melting it down. I filled my needle up and shoved it into my arm with a sigh. I stumbled backwards and fell against the wall. I slid down the wall, pulling my knees to my chest and wrapped my arms around them, letting my head fall onto my knees. My eyes started to burn and fill with tears. I was so sick of my life the way things were. I wanna just end it all. I pulled out my needle again to fill my veins one more time, but just as I was about to push it into my veins there was a knock at the door.
"Frank? Frank? Are you alright?" It was Gerard.
"Y-yeah. I'll b-be out i-in a s-sec." The words stumbled out of my mouth.
"Are you sure your okay?" Gerard said. I hadn't notice but he opened the door and was just starring down at me trying to pull the needle out of my arm.
"Shit, I'm f-fine," I said back to him as he opened the door the rest of the way and sat on the toilet.
"You didn't have to do that," he said, pointing at my arm.
"Yes I-I do," I said, putting my head in my hands.
"Why?"
"It's what I do," I said, looking at him sadly, wanting to shoot up again already.
"Is this why your parents kicked you out?"
"What's it matter? Are we gonna fool around or what?" I asked. I wanted to get this going.
"No, that's not why I want you here," he said. I looked at him confused.
"What is that supposed to mean?"
"I want to help you." I just looked at him. "I find you cute, and you look like you're tired of they way thing are going in your life. Am I right?"
All I could think was who the hell is this guy? Randomly paying for a fucked up stripper just to help him? What. The. Fuck.
"Yeah, I guess. This is all I know, though," I said reaching for my needle and the stuff in my bag.
"Ok then. First, you don't need this stuff anymore," he said standing up grabbing the stuff out of my hands. "Is this all you have?" he asked. All I could do was freeze. I looked down at my bag. All I had was in there, and I couldn't get anymore till I got paid for this. "Is there more in here?" he asked, reaching for my bag.
"NO!" I said diving for my bag, but I was too late, too slow. He had all I had in his hand. He opened the toilet lid and dropped it in. My heart sank and I felt sick. I started to cry as he flushed my favorite things down to the sewer.
"Hmm." I managed to make a noise.
"Thank god you're alive, you stupid FUCK!" I realized it was Jeph when he slapped me and called me a stupid fuck.
"For fuck sake, Jeph," I said holding my cheek and trying to sit up only to become really dizzy and to have to grab my head to get the room to stop spinning. "What happened?" I asked.
"You're an idiot that's what happened. You shot to much up and passed out. You always do that shit after I get you off," Jeph said standing up with his arms crossed.
"Whatever, I do not."
"Yes you do, and I always think you fucking killed yourself," Jeph said kicking me in the leg.
"What's he doing here?" I asked pointing to Gerard.
"He's paid to have you tonight," said Jim.
"What?"
"He has paid to rent you for the night. Ya know we do that here, remember?" Jim said in a voice that made me sound stupid.
"Yeah, I know, but he's been following me ever since yesterday or something. I don't know, but he's been following me, and it's creeping me out," I said to Jim.
"Well that's to bad, Frank. You don't have a choice unless you wanna quit," Jim said looking at me .
Gerard reached over and started to help me up, I snatched my arm out of his hand.
"Don't touch me," I said angrily. "You don't own me till 10pm, and it's only 9."
"Okay. Well me me at this address at 10," Gerard said pulling a piece of paper of of his pocket and handing it to me.
"Sure thing, chief," I said smiling and standing up. I looked over at Jeph as Gerard turned to leave. "You still have some of that captain left?" I asked.
"Yeah, sure do," he said to me as he slipped on his pants.
"Good, I'm gonna need it," I said walking over and sitting down on Jeph's bench.
"Dude, I don't think it will be that bad. I thought you like doing that kinda stuff 'cause you make a lot of money?"
"I do. It's just he has been following me around, and it kinda creeps me out," I said standing up and grabbing my bag to go out back with Jeph. Once we made it to our spot out back, I took the bottle from Jeph's hands and chugged. "What do you think will happen?" I asked.
"I don't know man. He seems like a good person. I don't think it will be like last time," he answered.
"Oh God! I didn't even think about that. Shit."
Ya see last time someone 'bought' me for the night, I nearly ended up in the hospital. The guy had tied me to the bed and nearly beat me to death while he fucked me. I had never been so scared in my life. Jeph had found me that morning in the hotel room bloodied and scared. I wouldn't let him take me to the hospital. I hate hospitals.
"It will be ok dude," he said putting his hand on my shoulder.
"I hope so. I can't go through that again," I said taking a big gulp.
**
I showed up at Gerard's place right when i was supposed to, but I couldn't knock on the door. I was too nervous. But just when I was about to say fuck it and leave the door opened.
"Frank?" Gerard said standing the staring at me.
"Um....hi," I said shyly. I hated this. I hated this feeling.
"Come in," he said standing to the side.
"Um....ok," I said looking up and down the hallway of the apartment building. I stepped inside and felt like I was going to throw up. I should just leave.
"You want anything? Coffee? Food?" he asked. I just stared at him not knowing what to say. "I'll make some coffee then," he said, turning and going into the kitchen. I just stood there not knowing what to do or how to act. Gerard came back with two cups of coffee. I'm still in the same place I was before.
"Have a seat," he said, motioning to the couch. I just did as I was told, clutching my bag in my hands. "You don't have to be so nervous. I'm not going to do anything to you," Gerard said as he sipped his coffee.
"I, um, I just--" I had no idea what I was doing, and all I wanted was a hit or a drink or something.
"It's okay, Frankie. You don't have to be scared. I'm not going to hurt you or anything," he said looking at me as I clutched my bag.
"Can I use your bathroom?" I asked, feeling sick.
"Yeah, it's the first door on the left," he said, pointing to the hallway.
"Thanks," I said practically running to the bathroom and closing the door behind me. Shit. What am I doing here? He's going to hurt me just like everyone else. I rummaged through my bag and found my stash. I pulled out everything I needed and got it ready, lighting the lighter and melting it down. I filled my needle up and shoved it into my arm with a sigh. I stumbled backwards and fell against the wall. I slid down the wall, pulling my knees to my chest and wrapped my arms around them, letting my head fall onto my knees. My eyes started to burn and fill with tears. I was so sick of my life the way things were. I wanna just end it all. I pulled out my needle again to fill my veins one more time, but just as I was about to push it into my veins there was a knock at the door.
"Frank? Frank? Are you alright?" It was Gerard.
"Y-yeah. I'll b-be out i-in a s-sec." The words stumbled out of my mouth.
"Are you sure your okay?" Gerard said. I hadn't notice but he opened the door and was just starring down at me trying to pull the needle out of my arm.
"Shit, I'm f-fine," I said back to him as he opened the door the rest of the way and sat on the toilet.
"You didn't have to do that," he said, pointing at my arm.
"Yes I-I do," I said, putting my head in my hands.
"Why?"
"It's what I do," I said, looking at him sadly, wanting to shoot up again already.
"Is this why your parents kicked you out?"
"What's it matter? Are we gonna fool around or what?" I asked. I wanted to get this going.
"No, that's not why I want you here," he said. I looked at him confused.
"What is that supposed to mean?"
"I want to help you." I just looked at him. "I find you cute, and you look like you're tired of they way thing are going in your life. Am I right?"
All I could think was who the hell is this guy? Randomly paying for a fucked up stripper just to help him? What. The. Fuck.
"Yeah, I guess. This is all I know, though," I said reaching for my needle and the stuff in my bag.
"Ok then. First, you don't need this stuff anymore," he said standing up grabbing the stuff out of my hands. "Is this all you have?" he asked. All I could do was freeze. I looked down at my bag. All I had was in there, and I couldn't get anymore till I got paid for this. "Is there more in here?" he asked, reaching for my bag.
"NO!" I said diving for my bag, but I was too late, too slow. He had all I had in his hand. He opened the toilet lid and dropped it in. My heart sank and I felt sick. I started to cry as he flushed my favorite things down to the sewer.
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