FicWad

If I wanted make that cup wash itself, thought Samantha, I could.
She looked at the chaos in the kitchen: there were dishes everywhere and the floor was looking kind of grimy too. She hated housework and she really didn’t have to do it. She was a witch.
She could just twiddle her nose and all the dishes would just rise from their places on the kitchen table where she had just eaten breakfast with her husband Darren and they would fly into the sink.
She noticed the plug had just inserted itself into the plughole and the tap had just turned itself on. She stopped herself before the washing up liquid bottle had raised itself from its position and dribbled its green ejaculate into the flowing water in the sink.
“That won’t do!” she said out loud even though the washing up liquid bottle was an inanimate object and the tap which she firmly turned off had no ears.

Darren her husband of a few months was human and Darren said “no” to her exercising her magic powers. So that’s what she would do.
No nose twitching, no flying and absolutely no virtual sex.
She did that sometimes when she was masturbating. The people in her fantasies came to life and then what bliss.
But she was married now and she was pretty sure that having sex with virtual people counted as adultery.
Even if the people were magic; and only in your head.

She was so bored. When she finished the washing up she would make the beds.
When she had made the beds she would clean out the cupboards. After that she might go to the library and get a book but that could be a bit of a double-edged sword.
She would only find herself in the romance section of the library reading erotic books and that would only set her off. The book she was reading was a very spicy book. T
He man on the cover had enormous … stomach muscles … and even bigger … pecks. He would be amazing to make love to thought Samantha. Darren can’t compare to that.
As she stood there gazing at the cover of the Mills and Boon Fantasy Romance edition she went into a daze. Only when a man’s hand gently caressed her arm did she look round.

To her horror a heavily muscled man was standing next to her in the middle of the reference collection, looking similar to the man in the book: horny and stripped to the waist.
She was so alarmed she pulled off the jacket she was wearing and whispered harshly to him “cover yourself up!”
The man didn’t seem alarmed by her reaction or being stripped to the waist.
“You summoned me up Samantha” he said in a fairly loud, reasonably normal voice. “Why don’t we go somewhere and make love?”
“I can’t make love to you -- ?”
“Tyson” supplied the fictional character in reply to her implied question.
“I’m married” she countered and was blocked by his fictional but quite physical smile.
“It doesn’t count” said Tyson, embracing her, ripping off her clothes and “accidently” brushing his hand against her breast. It felt really good.
Darren wasn’t much of a tit-man so it had been a long time since she had had someone touch her breasts.
“It does count” she said fighting against the urge to grab Tyson and have sex with him in the middle of the reference section.
“I’m married to Darren. You’ll just have to go away!”

Tyson just stood there in all his muscled enormity, his skin glazed with oil and sweat.
The aged and dingy occupants of the library were starting to notice his presence.
“OMG” thought Samantha. I’d better do something or someone will go fetch the librarian and then there’ll be hell to pay.
She tried to “zap” Tyson out of existence but he just stood there, tall and bronzed and just as fuckable as hell.
Tyson was going nowhere. He smiled at her. “I’m going to stay here until you stop summoning me up” he said mildly, “doing something just won’t work”.

That was quite some wake-up call thought Samantha. I’m getting it all the wrong way round. I’ve spent my whole life “doing things” – snapping my fingers, making a spell but in this situation it just won’t work (she didn’t say this out loud because you have to be quiet in a library, you understand).
What I have to do is shut off my inner critic and let my mind run free. She closed her eyes. Inside her head it was totally black. She took deep breath after deep breath. When she opened her eyes Tyson was nowhere to be seen.
She felt a lot more calm, but more embarrassed in her state of undress. She straightened her clothing and walked towards the entrance of the library building. I’ve got to get out of here she thought.
On the way out she spotted the Librarian. Samantha saw her look around for the offending naked man that one of the elderly patrons had told her about in the reference collection. But seeing no-one she went back to sit behind the desk.
“May I help you?” said the Librarian as she whisked past.
“No thank you” said Samantha and walked out of the door.

She was still thinking about that day as she continued with her house work.
How embarrassing was that? She wondered smoothing down the cover on the bed.
She hadn’t been back to the library since, it was like she was afraid that Tyson the muscle man was lurking there but in reality she knew he was only lurking around in her head.
She didn’t need the book. If she let herself she could conjure up the image on the front cover and she knew he would materialise here in this room.
“It won’t do” she repeated to herself trying to keep her and clear.
She started on the cupboard; it was quite a long job.
That was good she thought at last it’ll take my mind off the whole issue of her fantasy life and the tendency it had for making itself real.
She took some sweaters down she might need for winter. They smelt musty she should send them to the dry cleaner. She thought why am I doing this?
This is not the best way. All she really had to do was twiddle her nose, think of the sweaters, how they would took and smell if they were clean.
“Why do you make me do this Darren? It’s boring and slow.”

At that moment the phone rang. Please don’t let it be a call centre she thought.
Instead it was her mother Endora. “Why are you ringing me?” She asked.
“Because I thought you were doing this human thing” said her mother materialising in the room.
She looked her old self. Long flowing robes, mad hair. The whole thing floating like she had just dropped from a cloud, which she had, let’s face it.
She looked at what her daughter was doing on the bed. Why are you covered with dust?” she asked Samantha “it’s not a good look?”
“I’m tidying my cupboards” she told Endora.
“Well they look very untidy indeed”.
Her mother clicked her fingers and the sweaters and all the other clothes on the bed disappeared.
Samantha knew that when she looked her cupboards would be meticulously ordered and the sweater would be sweet smelling and clean.
She gave her mother a frustrated look “mother!” she said.
“What did I do?” said Endora looking innocent but knowing exactly what she had done.
“I just came to invite you to party on Mount Olympus with a few minor deities and Zeus.
Samantha knew what it would be like: imagine the worst orgy you’d ever been to and then add geese.
“You know I can’t come” said Samantha wishing she could, “I’m married To Darren now, I have sex with only him”.
“How boring!” said Endora eager to be off, “they don’t count in human terms, they’re only Gods”.
Samantha thought about having sex with Zeus, who was a hell of a lover, but stood her ground.
“I’m Darren’s wife mother, please leave me alone!”
“Zeus will be very disappointed” her mother said, and promptly disappeared in a puff of smoke.
Samantha sat down on the bed with a sigh. It would have been great to have sex with Zeus.
He could turn himself into animals and his semen was like gold. Ask anybody.

Maybe I can work this off she thought, reaching into her bedside drawer and bringing out a tube of KY. If I masturbate I’ll relieve the tension and it will all go away.
She took her pants off and lay down on the bed. She squeezed out a bit of lube. Then she spread her legs and applied it to her clitoris. It felt wonderful.
She started to describe circles around and around. She closed her eyes, soon she would reach orgasm. Almost like a reflex the old fantasy popped into her head: Tyson the muscle man, fantastic abs and long blond hair flowing down his back.
It was so vivid. She imagined in full glowing colour, like technicolour on speed or a morphine dream. She thought: I’m getting closer and closer, and she started to moan.
Then she nearly catapulted off the bed when she felt a man’s hand. She opened her eyes. It was Tyson in all his muscled glory, lying beside her on the bed, gently stroking her thigh.
“Would you like me to put it in?” he asked jovially, “I promise I won’t cum”.

Samantha’s orgasm disappeared. Tyson remained there on the bed.
“Get out of here!” she screamed “my husband can’t catch us together; he’ll think you’re a man”.
“I am a man” he told her “in a literary sense”.
She was freaking out. What if the neighbours saw them? That Gladys Kravitz was always peeping through the blinds.
Tyson said “look if you make love to me, then I’ll go”.
“You’re fiction, you don’t get to make conditions” she said.
*
After half an hour of this type of conversation she gave in and they started to make love.
He was the best. Half way through she actually let herself go.
That was when there was a knock at the door.
“OMG!” screamed Samantha leaping off the bed. Tyson grabbed his cock.
The door flew open; it was Darren who had come home from the office and a crappy day at work (a campaign he’d been working on had fallen through).
He was always grumpy but seeing his wife semi-naked with a fictitious man (who looked real, and very naked to him).
The naked man lying on his marital bed, made him even grumpier still.
“Samantha!” he groaned looking at his wife of some months lying there trying to cover her boobs, “what the hell are you doing?”
She couldn’t think of anything to say. “I was just having a lie down”.
“Yes but your lying down with a naked man”. He thought he’d better address the “elephant” in the room (Tyson was very well hung).

“He’d had to adjust to Samantha’s friends coming in and out of their home at inconvenient hours but when they had sex with his wife that was really going over the line.
“You haven’t introduced us” he said.
His voice had that haughty tone he had when she’d done something really bad, like “zap” in a takeaway or ask her mother for lunch.
He hated Endora. She was the mother in law from hell. She never remembered his name.
“His name is Tyson” said Samantha a little defensively, it wasn’t his fault he was in this room, she had conjured him up, “he comes from a Mills and Boon”.
“Why are you reading that rubbish?” he said.
If she’d read Ibsen or Chekhov none of this would be happening (better stay away from Nabokov she thought).
“I’m just so bored” said Samantha, sitting there on the edge of the bed. “You never let me go anywhere or do anything”.
“I just want you to be normal baby” Darren said. Tyson was still lounging on the edge of the bed.
“But she’s not your kind of normal” said Tyson from the bed, beaming and naked, “she’s a witch”.
“You stay out of this!” snapped Darren, he didn’t like being told his fortune a work of fiction, especially when that work was sitting there in the nude (he was a very competitive man).
“If you let Sam be herself sometimes you’d have fewer problems” the sage-like Tyson said.
“Can’t you get rid of him?” Darren said.
“He seems to have a life of his own” said Samantha sighing heavily, thinking of their stolen moment of passion; and the row that lay ahead.

Summary: Samantha is bored and conjures up Tyson a character from her romantic pulp fiction book who scratches her itch.