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GIANTESS UNDYNE X ALPHYS

Dear Undertale fanatics, I have a very important question to ask you all: do you remember how, at the very end of the final chapter of Alphys VS Undyne, titular main protagonists Alphys and Undyne had a verbal wrestling match with each other, in which the two of them hyper-evolved into their Super Saiyan ultra-forms in a fit of pent-up, jealous rage and fist-bumped each other so hard that it caused the entire universe to explode in a blatant ripoff of the F-Zero anime's Falcon Punch finale?

Well, guess what? Unsurprisingly, as it turns out, most of the contests between Alphys and Undyne throughout that story were actually largely fake and scripted, especially the wrestling one. Yes, indeed; in reality, nothing of importance actually happened at the end of the day.

Alphys and Undyne put aside their differences with other, the latter reluctantly accepted once and for all that the former was indeed a way better character than her, and everyone lived happily ever after. And no, Sans did not become the new Royal Scientist; not yet, at least.

However, notice how I said MOST of them, not ALL of them; yes, indeed, as unbelievably preposterous as it may sound, Undyne's infamously degenerate and ludicrously fetishistic little shrinking incident with Alphys during the fourth-through-sixth chapters actually WAS, in fact, unscripted!

In fact, at about 10:00 PM on the very night of that exact same day when Alphys' and Undyne's rivalry had finally reached its conclusion, Alphys was busy sitting at her disorganized, cluttered desk in her disproportionately massive lab as always, typing out love letters to all of her proud and loyal fans on her pink-glittered, cat-eared desktop...when all of a sudden, at probably the most expected moment, she recieved a very unexpected email message from Undyne!

"Alphys, please meet me over at my house ASAP so that the two of us can have a sleepover with each other, and by as soon as possible I mean NOW! Don't even reply to this message, just pack up your shit and head right on over here immediately!" the message forcefully commanded her.

"Alright, FINE..." Alphys sighed, heading down her nearby bathroom elevator and coming back up a few minutes later with all five of the Amalgamates surrounding her.

"Alright, guys, so I'm heading over to Undyne's house to spend the night with her and I would like all of you nasty little demons from the deepest depths of scientific hell itself to come with me for a change...you guys know what to do, right?" Alphys asked the five equally nodding monstrosities, winking slyly at Endogeny, who then immediately hung his head and blushed in shame.

"You betcha!" Lemon Bread laughed, wrapping her slimy, muscular arm around Endogeny and hugging him lovingly. "So...does this mean we get to fuck the fish now?"

"Uhh...well...kind of..." Alphys stammered, blushing intensely and sweating nervously as yet another conspicuously urgent message notification suddenly popped up on her email account.

"Look, I'll explain it as we go along, just come on already!" Alphys encouraged the five equally horrifying and revolting masses of melted-together organic matter as they slowly but surely shambled their way out the front door, dragging along behind Alphys like wounded corpses.

"WAIT...FOR...ME..." Snowdrake's Mother coughed and wheezed, crawling along behind the rest of the group and collapsing onto the floor in exhaustion from Hotland's excruciating heat as half of her entire body melted off the other side and then reformed itself for just about literally the millionth time that day.

"Come on, old lady, there's no need to keep everyone waiting..." Memoryhead sighed, extending several tentacles out from his eyesockets, grabbing Snowdrake's Mother by the arms, and dragging her along regretfully.

"So, um...may I kindly ask you exactly WHAT in the actual living hell it is that I'm looking at right now?" the riverperson asked Alphys nervously, shivering with fear as Alphys' so-called housepets merged together into his ferryboat.

"Look, I'll pay you ten bucks if you don't ask!" Alphys snickered, pulling out an incredibly convincing (albeit counterfeit) ten-dollar bill from her interdimensional pockets.

ONE FILTHY SCAM LATER...

"AND STAY OFF!" the riverperson yelled furiously, punting Alphys onto shore like a fat yellow football as her and the Amalgamates finally arrived at their destination: Waterfall!

Upon finally arriving at the front door of Undyne's house, Alphys rang the doorbell and patiently waited for Undyne to answer while the Amalgamates hastily snuck their way around to the back of Undyne's house; sure enough, Undyne kicked the door down so hard that it ended up cartoonishly flattening Alphys into a cute little lizard pancake!

"HAH! That shit NEVER gets old, am I right?" Undyne laughed, scraping Alphys off of the floor, blowing the air back into her through her mouth, dragging her inside by the hand and setting her down in the seat directly across from her lengthwise at the dinner table while Alphys' trusty Amalgamate friends leaked through the secret hatch into Undyne's basement cellar.

"So, uhh...what would you like to discuss with me?" Alphys asked, crossing her legs smugly on top of the table and wiggling her recently painted toes seductively at Undyne, who then immediately began panting and drooling at the mouth in response.

"MUST...RESIST..." Undyne stammered, desperately fighting the overpowering urge to lick, suck and kiss her beloved girlfriend's gorgeous soles like there was no tomorrow.

"Let me guess, it's about that little giantess incident you had last night, isn't it?" Alphys giggled, blushing with second-hand embarrassment and playfully curling her long, pointy toes as Undyne licked and slobbered all over her stinky, unwashed, sweaty lizard feet like a dog.

"Look, I'm sorry for sneaking inside your head and making a complete and utter fool of you on live television, and also for making a fucking disgusting, filthy, fetish-loaded spectacle of myself like I always do whenever you and me are together in private, okay?" Undyne sighed, briefly removing Alphys' toes from her mouth to speak before immediately stuffing them back in again.

"Mmm-hmm..." Alphys teased Undyne sassily as the latter whipped out her firmly erect cock, allowing the former to wrap her sexy lizard toes around it and stroke it up and down until Undyne just couldn't take it anymore.

"OHHH, SWEET FUCKING NEPTUNE, YOU'RE SO DAMNED GOOD AT THIS..." Undyne moaned as her dick spasmed and squirted out a steaming hot load of cum all over Alphys' eagerly awaiting, tightly scrunched soles, which Undyne then proceeded to passionately lick up with glee.

"Heh, let's just say I kinda sorta PRACTICED a lot with Asgore, if you know what I mean..." Alphys teased her flamboyantly, causing everyone in the general vicinity to bust out laughing.

"Alphys, my god, you never cease to absolutely fucking amaze me, do you? And neither shall I to absolutely amaze YOU! Come on up to the bedroom with me, I got something to show you!" Undyne laughed uproariously, wiping the laughter-induced tears from her eyes as she grabbed Alphys by the hand yet again and dragged her upstairs into the master bedroom.

"Lemme guess...your newly acquired secret stash of illegally downloaded pornography starring me and you?" Alphys sighed, rolling her eyes and trying not to think about where Undyne got said porn from...the keyword being THINK.

"Nope, even better!" Undyne laughed, crawling onto her bed, reaching into her pillowcase and feeling around in it until she finally got a hold of the thing she was looking for. "Guess what I now have that you DON'T?"

"With my luck, it's going to be the fucking shrink ray, isn't it?" Alphys shrugged and sighed dejectedly, facepalming herself and wishing someone would just come and end her life already.

"CORRECTAMUNDO, MOTHERFUCKER!" Undyne laughed maniacally, pulling out Alphys' stolen shrink ray from inside the pillowcase and pointing it directly at Alphys.

"GIVE ME THAT, YOU FUCKING DEMENTED PIECE OF-"

"UH UHH UHH! I don't think so, honey!" Undyne laughed, firing the shrink ray and hitting Alphys in mid-lunge right when she was about to snatch it right out of Undyne's filthy hands.

"So, how's the view down there, huh? You feeling SMALL and INSIGNIFICANT yet?" Undyne laughed, removing her clothing as Alphys (who was now roughly two inches tall) trembled in terror at the mere sight of the massive, neatly made landscape of memory-foam bedding that now all-too-familiarly laid before her, not to mention the towering female fish colossus that was currently occupying it.

"Listen up, pal: once I'm through with you, you'll wish you had been thrown in the Undertale fanbase's scrappy yard both sooner AND more thoroughly! YOU WILL FEEL MY WRATH!" Undyne boasted valiantly as she lifted up her massive, ever-so-gorgeous webbed-toed foot and readied herself to bring it right down on top of her formerly beloved lizard girlfriend.

"NO, GOD, PLEASE, NO! NO! NOOOOOO!" Alphys shrieked in horror, cowering face-up on the floor and blushing intensely as Undyne's massively unwashed foot pressed her firmly into the mattress. "MMMFFF!"

"So, what do you think, SWEETHEART? You like the SMELL down there? You like the TASTE?" Undyne laughed, grinding her filthy, putrid, reeking toes into Alphys' face and watching as said face started to turn green with absolute disgust.

"Well, at least there isn't any nasty fungus growing in between them...OH FUCK, I JINXED IT!" Alphys screamed internally, her nose crinkling up like a sheet of tin foil and bleeding in untold agony while her eyes welled up with bitter, painful tears as she licked in between Undyne's toes, suddenly feeling rather grateful that she hadn't eaten recently.

"COME ON, WORSHIP ME HARDER!" Undyne laughed, digging her foot forcefully into the mattress and feeling the desperate, pitiful squirming of Alphys underneath her sole.

"FOR THE LOVE OF FUCKING CHRIST, WHY DID IT HAVE TO BE FOOT FETISHISM OF ALL THINGS?!" Alphys growled furiously as she frantically crawled around underneath Undyne's foot and licked all over the fascinatingly wrinkled underside of it before finally kissing the ball of her foot and almost passing out from the sheer stench of it.

"Aww, are you feeling tuckered out?" Undyne teased her sadistically. "Well, too bad, because there's WAY more where THAT came from, cutie-kins!" Undyne laughed, forcing Alphys to repeat the exact same process yet again with her other foot.

"DEAR GOD...I'M NEVER, EVER STEPPING ON PICNIC ANTS AGAIN..." Alphys cried and sobbed with regret as her tongue reluctantly swept across every last topographic detail of Undyne's other sole, right down to all of the little tendons and metatarsals.

"MAN, if I had known that it would make my feet feel THIS good, I would have subjected Alphys to this utterly heartless torment a LONG time ago..." Undyne moaned with pleasure, uncurling and relaxing her toes as she put her feet straight-up right next to each other in the footjob position and placed Alphys right in the conveniently elliptical little gap between her arches.

"Well, at least her SOLES are just as soft as they look..." Alphys blushed and laughed dementedly, pointing a finger-gun at the side of her head and firing it as Undyne began passionately kneading and rolling Alphys in between her soles.

"IMPACT GEL! APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE HEELS AND BALLS OF YOUR FEET!" Alphys randomly quoted Billy Mays like a complete and utter lunatic as her entire body flipped and flailed around like a ragdoll, becoming totally drenched in her own foot-sweat-infused-saliva in the process.

"Now, I don't know about you, but personally, I think it's about time you met your MAKER!" Undyne laughed uproariously, grabbing the dazed Alphys and shoving her straight into her vagina...which also hadn't been washed in quite some time, mind you.

"If I could reset literally EVERYTHING right now, I would..." Alphys gagged as she was squooshed in between the fleshy, disgustingly moist walls of Undyne's birth canal, legitimately feeling like she was about to throw up from the sheer stench of week-old-vagina and fish mixed together as Undyne forcefully jammed her in with her finger, causing her vagina to simultaneously bleed and ejaculate all over Alphys' entire helpless body.

"Sorry to jam a FINGER into your plans, Little Miss Evil Genius!" Undyne laughed as she pushed Alphys all the way into her uterus before finally letting out the loudest and nastiest-smelling vaginal fart of her entire life.

"DEEEEUUUEEEAUUUGGGHHH!" Alphys shrieked in unbearable pain and agony, literally passing out and slipping into unconsciousness from sheer loss of nose blood.

"Hey, Alphys? YOO HOO?" Alphys woke up a few minutes later and heard Undyne call out for her after she had finally pulled her out of her vagina by the tail with a pair of tweezers.

"What are you planning to fucking do with me next, Undyne, hmm? WHAT, are you going to fucking EAT me? Even after ALL of the fucking places I've BEEN recently?" Alphys growled bitterly and angrily at Undyne, already becoming even more extremely disappointed in her.

"You know what? Now that you mention it, no." Undyne sighed, freeing Alphys from the tweezers and holding her in the palm of her hand as she got out the shrink ray and shrunk Alphys even further until she was almost microscopic.

"I'm going to take that fucking shitty ATTITUDE of yours and snort it right up my fucking NOSE!" Undyne laughed smugly, flaring her nostrils and preparing to suck Alphys in...when all of a sudden, the Amalgamates busted the door down and leapt straight into action!

"Not on OUR watch, you won't!" Memoryhead laughed as Endogeny grabbed Alphys and shoved her literally all the way up Undyne's nasal passageway and directly into her brain!

"Whoa, dude, not so hard! You literally just poked me right in the BRAIN, for fuck's sake!" Undyne scolded Endogeny, suddenly freezing dead in her tracks as she made a truly terrifying realization. "WAIT A MINUTE...IN THE BRAIN?! OH, FOR THE LOVE OF THE SEVEN FUCKING-"

"YEAH-HAH, THAT'S RIGHT, BITCH, I'VE GOT FULL CONTROL OVER YOUR SKINNY ASS NOW! WHY, HELL, FOR ALL I CARE, YOU AND YOUR FREAKING SMARTASS ONE-LINERS CAN DIE TOGETHER!" Alphys laughed as maniacally as could be, communicating with Undyne directly through the microphone that was attached to her brain's main-system supercomputer.

"But...but...for fuck's sake, I thought that this stupid show was OVER already!" Undyne stammered, trembling in fear with her legs quaking at the thought of what Alphys (at her current level of anger) could potentially do to her now that history had quite frankly repeated itself.

"If by the SHOW you mean the first SEASON, then YES!" Alphys chortled, causing Undyne to suddenly develop an intensely strong urge to kill herself as she suddenly realized that this whole thing was actually being filmed on live public television this whole time.

"Alphys, WHY? JUST WHY?!" Undyne cried, her eyes glistening with fake tears.

"Undyne, I'm doing this because you fucking deserve it. Congratulations, DEAR FRIEND; you've officially pushed me SO goddamned far beyond my moral tolerance limit that I've decided it's about time I showed you who's the real BOSS here!" Alphys spat disgustedly, delving straight into Undyne's memory banks with a mere click of the mouse and browsing through each category.

"Hmm, let's fucking SEE here, SHALL we?! OOH, LOOK, IT'S ALL OF UNDYNE'S DEEPEST, DARKEST, KINKIEST, AND BEST OF ALL, MOST EMBARRASSING PERSONAL SECRETS! Oh, BOY, will this make for some truly, utterly HILARIOUS television!" Alphys laughed downright insanely.

TEN STRAIGHT MINUTES OF PURE, RELENTLESS, PUBLIC KINKSHAMING LATER...

"OH GOD, OH GOD, OH GOD, I'M SO HUMILIATED...I JUST WANT TO FUCKING DIE..." Undyne moaned in despair, burying her head in her hands and weeping in agony.

"Undyne, I SWEAR TO GOD, if you don't do EXACTLY as I command, I am going to bring out these fucking RAZOR-sharp claws of mine and cause so much MOTHERfucking damage in here that by the time I'm done, your brain will all but literally end up landing under the fucking SHREDDED PAPER category in the local hipster ART MUSEUM!" Alphys ranted furiously at Undyne, beginning to almost seriously consider actually doing so for real.

"Alphys, you're seriously fucking SCARING me shitless right now; I honestly didn't even know that was possible in the first place!" Undyne stammered, almost wetting her pants in fear.

"Anything's possible when you set your MIND to it, HONEY! NOW DANCE IN THE MOST PUBLICLY HUMILIATING WAY HUMANLY POSSIBLE FOR MY OWN DEMENTED SEXUAL GRATIFICATION! LEARN HOW IT FUCKING FEELS! YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS, UNDYNE?! YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU FUCK A STRANGER IN THE HEAD?!" Alphys roared at the top of her lungs, reaching into her pockets, pulling out the disc for a rather embarrassing song tailor-made for Undyne to sing, and finally inserting it into the disc drive of Undyne's brain.

"Remember, pal, it ain't over till the skinny lady sings!" Lemon Bread and Memoryhead laughed as they forcefully, deliberately dressed Undyne up in the most degrading outfit possible; her Naked Mew Mew Kissy Princess bondage costume!

"LOADING COMMAND PROMPT: 100% COMPLETE!" the computer informed Alphys.

"OH, MAN, THIS FEELS SO GOOD...SWEET, SWEET REVENGE..." Alphys moaned with pleasure, clicking the DANCE button as Undyne began singing and dancing to an extended cut of the Mew Mew Kissy Cutie theme song, with the lyrics edited to address how big of a dick she was.

"My sex life was such a wreck, every time I would check AND SEE THAT ALPHYS WAS LITERALLY THE ONLY FUCKING HOPE I EVER HAD FOR A WIFE!" Undyne sang as she leapt to and fro, lovingly caressing the Alphys bodypillow from her bed, making out with it and doing the tango with it.

"I had erectile dysfunction all day but I just wanted to FUCKING SHIT AND PISS EVERYWHERE; OH, THE UNBEARABLE STRIFE!" Undyne sang, awkwardly crossing her legs and clutching her ass in pain as her bathroom duty substances came spilling right out onto the floor at the worst possible moment.

"And at school, everyone would always make fun of me BECAUSE I HAVE ALMOST EVERY SINGLE FETISH IN THE FUCKING BOOK AND I'M A HORNY BASTARD TOO!" Undyne sang as she smooched Reaper Bird's feet, sucked Lemon Bread's teeth, licked Memoryhead's eyeballs, and french-kissed Endogeny, all while twirling about the room like a total deranged lunatic.

"And also because I smell like rotten fish and LIVE IN A FUCKING ZOO!" Undyne sang as Lemon Bread shoved his cock so far up her throat that it literally went all the way through her digestive system, "came" out her butthole and skewered her while Endogeny and Memoryhead tickle-tortured and tentacle-raped her violently.

"I'M A SHAMELESS SLAVE TO ALPHYS! WHEN I LICK HER FEET, I BEG FOR MORE!" Undyne sang as Lemon Bread chewed her up, jizzed all over her through his teeth, then spat her out onto the floor.

"I READ YAOI AND YURI ALL DAY! I FAP TO CHILD AND INFLATION PORN!" Undyne sang as she breastfed Snowdrake's Mother and got a blowjob from Endogeny at the same time.

"ALL I KNOW IS HOW TO THROW SPEARS! I CAN'T COOK OR STUDY WORTH A SHIT!" Undyne sang as the Amalgamates poured cold, slimy leftover spaghetti all over her, piled together on top of her and gang-raped her furiously.

"AND THE ONLY THING I LIVE FOR IS TO BE ALPHYS' GIRLFRIEND!" Undyne sang as the Amalgamates dipped her in a massive pool of their own cum and rolled her around in it.

"OH, DEAR..." Undyne gasped, putting her hand over her forehead and fainting head-over-heels onto her bed from sheer embarrassment while the Amalgamates (and the general public) collectively laughed their ever-loving asses off at her expense.

MEANWHILE, DEEP INSIDE UNDYNE'S BRAIN...

"OHHH, SWEET EVER-LOVING JESUS, THAT WAS SO SATISFYING!" Alphys laughed, unclasping her hand from around her dick and admiring the sheer amount of cum she had just sprayed all over the computer screen as she began to feel somewhat ashamed of herself.

"Come on, guys, it's time for everyone to go home!" Alphys signaled to the Amalgamates through the computer's built-in microphone, prompting Memoryhead to reach in with his tentacles and unceremoniously pull Alphys out, using the shrink ray to grow her back to two-inch size...because he had accidentally put it onto the wrong setting.

"OH NO, YOU DON'T!" Undyne, who had suddenly woken back up from the sudden physical shock to her brain, laughed maniacally as she snatched Alphys right out of Memoryhead's grip

and brutally squeezed her in between the palms of her hands, causing her face to turn blue.

"ALPHYS, I'M NOT LOOSENING UP UNTIL YOU FUCKING APOLOGIZE, JUST SO YOU KNOW!" Undyne yelled frustratedly at Alphys as the latter's face began to turn purple.

"OKAY, OKAY, I'M SORRY! JUST PLEASE DON'T EAT ME, PLEASE, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, I'M BEGGING YOU!" Alphys screamed and cried, regaining her breath as Undyne reluctantly loosened her grip.

"And WHY NOT, may I ask?" Undyne sassily teased Alphys, shoving her straight into her massive, razor-sharp-toothed (well, actually, she had just recently trimmed the tips of them to make them flatter and therefore safer) mouth.

"OH, LORD SAVE ME...AGAIN WITH THE FUCKING STENCH! UNDYNE, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, AT LEAST SPARE ME MY GODDAMNED NOSE, WOULD YOU PLEASE?!" Alphys ranted angrily atop Undyne's slimy nasty tongue, nearly puking yet again from how absolutely atrocious Undyne's breath smelled.

"You spare mine and I'll spare yours!" Undyne laughed as she placed Alphys in between her terrifyingly massive rows of teeth and readied herself to gently (but still very painfully) chew her.

"UNDYNE, PLEASE, CAN'T WE JUST WORK THIS OUT?!" Alphys cried and screamed as she weakly and hopelessly attempted to push Undyne's jaws away from each other with her hands and feet.

"Oh, believe me, you'll have PLENTY of time to work shit out when you're fucking DEAD! I bet there's gonna be hours upon HOURS of DELIGHTFUL paperwork to fill out! HAVE FUN, MOTHERFUCKER!" Undyne laughed as Alphys finally gave in and accepted her fittingly gruesome fate.

"JUST...KILL ME...ALREADY..." Alphys winced in pain as Undyne crushed her in between her immensely ferocious rows of yellow, plaque-coated teeth.

"MY ENTIRE LIFE...HAS TRULY BEEN NOTHING BUT A LABYRINTH OF BAD CHOICES, HASN'T IT..." Alphys moaned in despair as Undyne began forcefully grinding her in between her teeth.

"WHO'S A SICK, DEGENERATE FUCK? YES WE ARE, ALPHYS, OH YES WE ARE!" Alphys laughed dementedly as she crawled up onto the roof of Undyne's mouth, hung face-down from it on all fours, and began moaning with pleasure as Undyne's saliva-drenched tongue eagerly began licking all the way up and down her entire body, causing her clothing to drip with saliva.

"Hmm, looks like the little mouse is a bit too BIG to swallow! Here, let me help you with that!" Lemon Bread laughed, handing Undyne a nice, tall, half-empty glass of Reaper Bird's puke.

"OH SHIT, OH SHIT, OH SHIT, WHAT AM I GONNA DO, WHAT AM I GONNA DO?!" Alphys panicked, standing barefooted (as always) atop Undyne's tongue as the latter slowly but surely tilted the glass toward her mouth and prepared to wash the former right down her throat.

"HURK?!" Undyne gagged as Alphys leapt straight up and grabbed tightly onto her big, dangling fish uvula!

"Uh...coochie-coochie COO?" Alphys giggled awkwardly as she began tickling Undyne's violently swinging, extremely sensitive uvula with her claws.

"HIC...HURK...BLEEEAUUUGGGHHH!" Undyne gagged, bent over and threw up, effectively puking Alphys straight into that very same vomit glass that Lemon Bread had given her.

"UGH...I think I'm gonna be SICK..." Alphys moaned in disgust as she struggled to keep her head above the...ahem...water, what with her god-awful swimming skills and whatnot.

"HASTA LA VISTA, AMIGO!" Undyne laughed maniacally as she poured the entire glass of vomit down her throat in one fell gulp, bringing Alphys along for the ride with the rest of its contents.

"WHY DO PEOPLE HAVE THIS FUCKING FETISH IN REAL LIFE, IT MAKES ABSOLUTELY NO GODDAMNED SENNNSE!" Alphys screamed in terror as she tumbled down Undyne's esophagus and landed face-first in her ravenous, pulsating stomach.

"AHH...all in a horrible, awful, despicable night's work!" Undyne sighed with relief, burping loudly and patting her rumbling belly while Alphys clung for dear life to the fleshy, veiny internal wall of her stomach as the stomach in question began filling up at an alarming rate with digestive fluids.

"UNDYNE, IN THE NAME OF ALL THAT IS HOLY, JUST FUCKING STOP!" Alphys screamed and cried, crawling up onto the ceiling of Undyne's stomach and struggling to maintain her natural-born lizard grip as Undyne's stomach lubrication process began to kick in.

"And why SHOULD I, may I ask?" Undyne laughed, rubbing her belly triumphantly.

"UNDYNE, DON'T YOU REMEMBER WHAT YOU SAID TO ME THE LAST TIME THINGS CAME TO THIS?" Alphys sobbed miserably as she held on so tightly that Undyne's stomach actually began to bleed (dust) a little. "I KNOW YOU'RE STILL IN THERE SOMEWHERE, RIGHT?!"

"Uhh...what exactly was it that I said again? I forgot..." Undyne sighed, blushing regretfully as her stomach acid began to violently boil and splash into Alphys' face.

"You literally said, and I fucking quote: ALPHYS, I'M THE ONLY TRUE FRIEND YOU EVER HAD! WHAT'LL YOU DO WITHOUT ME, FUCKING KILL YOURSELF?!" Alphys wailed in agony.

"OH...OH MY GOD, WHAT HAVE I DONE? WHAT HAVE I DONE?!" Undyne screamed internally, clutching her head as she realized that her best friend in the whole wide world was about to die the most brutally horrible and tragic type of death in all of existence because of her!

"Don't worry about it, just eat some Taco Bell and let your stomach do the talking FOR you!" Memoryhead chuckled, reaching into his interdimensional storage rift, pulling out a huge load of leftover double-deckers, and rapidly force-feeding them down Undyne's throat.

"Oh, dear, I'm not feeling very good..." Undyne moaned in gastrointestinal discomfort immediately after she finished eating, putting her hand over her stomach and hastily running outside to the local cesspool, where she then sat over the edge of its boundaries and waited for the inevitable to happen.

FIVE MINUTES LATER...

"OH, LORD HAVE MERCY ON MY POOR INNOCENT STOMACH, THE PAIN IS JUST DOWNRIGHT FUCKING UNBEARABLE!" Undyne wailed in agony, clutching her violently rumbling stomach with both hands as manly tears of suffering leaked from her eyes.

"Well, I suppose this is definitely ONE way to flush me out, so to speak!" Alphys laughed, blushing and sweating from the sheer indignity of the current situation she was in as Undyne's stomach literally flushed itself like a toilet, sending Alphys careening through her intestinal tract at ludicrous speed.

"Wow, it feels like I'm in a waterslide! WHEEE!" Alphys laughed excitedly as she slid through Undyne's intestines at almost neck-breaking speed, giggling girlishly as the thousands of villi within brushed against her body and tickled her.

"OH BOY, HERE COMES THE EXIT!" Alphys shrieked with joy, holding her nose and bracing herself as Undyne's rectal opening (in laymen's terms, her anus) came into view.

"AUUUGGGHHH!" Undyne could be heard screaming in pain from all the way back at her house as she took a massive diarrhea dump into the cesspool, actually managing to turn the water brown for quite a few seconds despite the water's magical instant-purification process.

"Alphys, can you really still find it in you to forgive me, even after all of the absolutely atrocious and utterly despicable things I've done to you?" Undyne asked Alphys, gently stroking her like a mouse as she scooped her up into her hands and set her in between her plump, juicy fish tits, causing poor, poor little Alphys to turn rosy-red and squeak loudly with embarrassment.

"Aww, there, there, there's nothing to be afraid of, you silly little sweetheart! Apart from dying of obesity, that is!" Undyne playfully teased Alphys, gently squooshing her in between said fish tits and watching as she buried her head in her hands and trembled in utter humiliation.

"Well, I guess our work here is done!" the Amalgamates sighed, heading back home and vowing to never, EVER speak of what had just happened between Alphys and Undyne again.

THE NEXT MORNING, AT UNDYNE'S HOUSE...

"So, Alphie, how does it feel watching your favorite episodes of Mew Mew Kissy Cutie from such an a-CUTE-ly fascinating new perspective with me?" Undyne giggled as she sat on the couch and watched Mew Mew and Ruff Ruff duke it out in yet another giantess mecha battle for at least the hundredth time, briefly averting her eyes from the utterly nonsensical madness going on in the show to peek down into her cleavage...which Alphys was still firmly stuck in, by the way.

"Oh, how I yearn for death's sweet embrace...not to mention a very, very, VERY long and cleansing shower..." Alphys moaned in despair as eye-gougingly bright colors, characters ranging from just plain cloyingly cutesy to obnoxiously melodramatic and everything in between, stupid facial expressions, inane and excessively drawn-out plotlines, goofy sound effects, over-the-top filler action sequences, and a comical overabundance of toilet humor filled the screen.

And Alphys LOVED this show.