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It was the lights that bothered him. Well, no. What really bothered him was how hard it took to hold the position. And how that led to the cramping. And the twitching. And the kinks in the back. Shuichi tried to make his groan quiet as he rolled his shoulders. He hoped he hadn't moved too much.

The position had been worked out in advance. Shuichi sat on the hardwood floor, his knees tucked beneath him, his back straight, his hands folded on his lap, and his eyes looking forward. The last part gave him the most trouble. Why was Yuki taking so long? He must have been waiting here two hours. Shuichi stole a glance at a clock. Only forty-five minutes had passed.

"Shoot!" he whispered. Shuichi tried his best to re-assume the position. They'd been planning this for a week now. The toys had come in the mail, the time had been set, and they'd set down some rules. Any minute now Yuki would come for him. Any minute now Yuki would take him and ... Shuichi felt his cock twitch and counted to ten. The feeling subsided, but he couldn't stop blushing.

Yeah, the lights were definitely bothering him. He imagined he could feel their heat boiling his skin. Shuichi sighed. What if Yuki forgot about him? Or what if he hadn't done everything right? He went over all the steps in his head again. He was to come home, get ready, knock three times on Yuki's door and wait for him just like this. Yuki would then come for him when he pleased.

Or maybe this was it. Maybe Yuki wanted him to sit out here all night. The thought made Shuichi lonely. He could probably do that if Yuki wanted it that way. But the possibility that it wasn't deliberate, that Yuki could have just forgotten him, turned the whole idea sour.

Or maybe this was all to prove a point. Yuki had glared at Shuichi when he initially suggested doing this. Shuichi's mouth twitched when he remembered Yuki telling him he was too inexperienced, too naïve. That he was unaware of what he was asking. How old did Yuki think he was? Of course Shuichi knew. He had an internet connection after all. That was how he found out that Yuki once wrote about it in one of his novels - knew that Yuki hadn't portrayed it as a bad thing. Shuichi wanted to do it.

But for who? For you, or for me? Yuki asked.

Shuichi didn't know the right answer. He still didn't. But he wore Yuki down over the next few days, told him what he wanted and waited until they bought what they needed. And tonight was the night.

At least he hoped so.

Shuichi felt his shoulders begin to slump. Then he heard a sound of a chair rolling across the floor and straightened himself up again. He started to count back from one hundred as he heard the footsteps drawing nearer, then farther away. Shuichi wanted to scream. After another fifteen agonizing minutes, the footsteps drew nearer again.

He could feel Yuki's presence in the room. Shuichi tried not to look at him but silently begged for Yuki to come closer, to enter his line of vision. He could hear the sound of the bag hitting the floor. Yuki sat on the couch in front of him.

"You can relax a bit, but stay where you are." Yuki's voice was firm yet noncommittal.

Shuichi let out a sigh that was a bit louder than he liked and dropped his shoulders. He smiled at Yuki and looked him in the eye, getting excited as he took Yuki in. Yuki had changed from his morning clothes into a tight black shirt and black jeans. Shuichi couldn't help but stare. Yuki looked so cool.

"We talked about this before, but I want to go over it again." Yuki lit a cigarette and took a puff. "You gave me a basic idea of what you wanted to do and I'll stick to that. I may do a few things that will surprise you or challenge you. In fact, I hope to. But I won't do anything you specifically told me not to do. Do you understand?"

Shuichi nodded. "Yes, Yuki-san. I do." The "-san" was new. He usually wasn't so formal, but it was what Yuki asked for. Part of the game.

"Now I want you to know what I expect from you. Do you know what that is?"

Shuichi nodded again. "Yes, Yuki-san."

"And what is it?"

The words caught in his throat. It was one thing to think them, but to actually admit to it .... Shuichi blushed, lowered his eyes, and then spoke.

"Total obedience."

"Bingo." Yuki laid the cigarette on the ashtray. "I want everything followed to the letter. What I want, when I want. I expect you to be compliant and polite, no matter how rude you think I am to you."

Yuki stood up and looked down at Shuichi with what almost looked like a glare. Shuichi shivered out of both fear and excitement. This was it.

"I also want you to keep this in mind. You are to strive to be obedient - to be a perfect slave. If you think that acting like a brat or disobeying my orders will get you more attention, put that out of your head now. It doesn't amuse me or excite me and I'll stop the session entirely. If you want something there are ways to let me know, but misbehavior is not one of them. Understand?"

"Yes," Shuichi answered. He felt like he was going out to sing before a crowd of millions. No, that would have been easier. Much easier.

Yuki crouched down to meet Shuichi's eye level. "Now here's what you can expect from me. I will hurt you, but I will not harm you. If you ever feel like you can't do something, you can designate a special phrase and I will stop everything. Have you found one yet?"

"Nittle Grasper!" Shuichi grinned. His smile faded when he saw Yuki's frown. "Sashimi."

"Fine," Yuki stood up. "Take off your clothes."

Shuichi smiled. This was what he had been waiting for. He leaped to his feet and practically ripped off his shirt and pants, throwing them to the floor.

Yuki pounced on him and pushed Shuichi's head towards the ground. Shuichi cried out as he felt Yuki's hand slap his ass.

"How old are you? Pick them up and fold them nicely."

Shuichi's heart dropped into his stomach. They'd been playing for less than a minute and he managed to screw up. Shuichi hung his head as he bent on his hands and knees and folded the clothes, making sure to be extra careful and fold along the creases. When he was done he held them in Yuki's direction.

"Good, you're waiting for my orders. Put them under the coffee table."

Shuichi did so. Yuki said 'good,' didn't he? He was doing something right. Maybe Yuki wasn't too mad now. Shuichi turned back to Yuki and looked up at him.

"Lower your eyes when you face me."

Shuichi did so. "Yes, Yuki-san."

"Did I say you could speak?"

Shoot! "No. I mean ... wait. I'm sorry, I ..."

Yuki slapped him again. Shuichi couldn't help but cry out. How could he screw up like this? Shuichi's breathing became erratic as Yuki made his way over to the bag and opened it. Yuki barked at him to sit at the table and Shuichi did so, his eyes lowered so that he was staring intently at the patterns in the glass.

Yuki sat on the opposite side and placed a whip, a tickler and a dildo on the table. "Pick one."

Shuichi tried to speak and only a wheeze came out.

"I said, pick one."

"You can pick, Yuki-san. I just want what will make you happy, master."

Yuki growled and made another lunge for Shuichi. Shuichi let out another cry. "Ack! I'm sorry. I'm sorry!"

"What the hell are you apologizing for?"

"I ... I don't know," Shuichi tried to back away from Yuki. "I'm ... I don't know what I did wrong. If you tell me I promise I won't do it again, just ..."

Yuki's face softened. He drew nearer to Shuichi and laid a hand on his shoulder. Shuichi lowered his eyes and placed his hand over Yuki's.

"Can you do this?" Yuki asked.

"Yes, yes I can." Shuichi rested his head on Yuki's arm. "I'm sorry, I promise I'll behave better, and ..."

"Idiot. I'm your dominant." Yuki pulled his hand away. "And this is your first time. Did you think I expected you to be perfect? And even if you were, I could punish you for any reason I wanted to."

"I know, but ..."

"If you made a mistake, don't do it again but don't dwell on what went wrong before."

Shuichi sighed. "I ... I'm sorry."

"And don't do anything extra to defer to me. Take what I give you. I won't do it very often."

"Okay," Shuichi seemed to have gotten his breathing under control now.

"Good, now pick one."

Shuichi thought for a minute, and then pointed to the tickler. Best to start off with something that wouldn't hurt too much.

Yuki smiled and picked it up. "Why did you pick this? Because it looked like the most gentle choice? You can speak when you answer me."

"Yes, Yuki-san."

"I'm afraid I haven't been totally honest with you."

Shuichi couldn't help but look up. "Huh?"

"I let you pick one of the toys I would use on you - but just one. I had something else planned for each of them." Yuki reached into the bag and took out a long rope. "This was what was planned for the tickler. You may be sorry you asked for it later."

Yuki's grin scared Shuichi a bit. His lover looked like he was ready to drink his blood. Shuichi tried not to shiver.

"Stand up and keep your head locked forward. Keep your hands behind your back and your legs apart."

Shuichi did so. Yuki took the rope and slowly lowered it around Shuichi's neck.

A wave of panic ran through Shuichi. "Sashimi! Sashimi!" He ducked beneath the rope and pushed himself away. "You said you wouldn't do that!"

"But you were fine with ... oh!" Yuki smiled a bit. "This isn't going to choke you."

Shuichi looked suspicious.

"Look, this is what I'm going to do." Yuki placed the rope over his own head, letting it fall around his neck like a sash. Slightly above his breastbone he tied a loose knot. "This is where I'm going to tie the first knot. Come back over here."

Shuichi walked back to Yuki. Yuki took the rope off his neck and put it on Shuichi's. Feels like some sort of bizarre marriage ceremony, Shuichi thought for a moment. Yuki then took the ends of the rope and threw them between Shuichi's legs.

"Move your hands to behind your head," said Yuki. Shuichi did so. Yuki wrapped the ends of the rope around Shuichi's torso, up his back and through the loop. The rope pulled the loop around Shuichi's neck apart. Yuki tugged on the rope and it tightened around Shuichi's body, pinching him not around his throat but around his stomach, ass and back. Shuichi gasped loudly. His cock became harder.

"See?" Yuki rubbed Shuichi's groin. "Feels nice, doesn't it? And you've got full use of your lungs."

Shuichi moaned in response.

Yuki pulled the ends of the rope out from the loop. He then tied more knots in the rope, creating a line of knots that ran down and up the back of Shuichi's body. When he was done, he pushed the ends through the loop again, wrapping the rope around Shuichi.

"This is my favorite part," purred Yuki. He took the two ends of the rope and threaded them through the ropes connecting the first and second knot. Then wrapped the ends around Shuichi's back and did the same to the loop in the back, then the next in the front, then the next in the back ....

The rope circling Shuichi from chest, to groin, to back had been relatively slack at first, despite Yuki's initial demonstration. But now as Yuki threaded the rope around his body it got tighter and tighter. Not enough to hurt, but Shuichi had trouble keeping still.

The loop near the groin was next. Yuki treated that loop no differently, but the brush of Yuki's hands against his privates combined with his growing excitement from the tightening rope made him harden completely. He tried to control his breathing as Yuki tied a final knot on the small of Shuichi's back.

Shuichi could feel Yuki's eyes looking him over. Yuki ran his hand over Shuichi's chest.

"Wonderful." Yuki took Shuichi's hands off his head and pulled them down to his back. He took one of the rope ends and tied loops around Shuichi's left wrist, then did the same to the right. He then tied both the ends together in a knotted bow. "Move your legs together."

Shuichi did so as Yuki took out another bit of rope. He looped the new rope around Shuichi's legs, just below his knees. After tying it around multiple times, he looped the rope around its own center, between Shuichi's legs, and then tied it. He took another rope and did the same to his area above his feet.

While he knew it may be disobedient, Shuichi couldn't help but test the ropes. He tried to pull apart his arms and legs. He barely squirmed.

"Tight enough for you?" Yuki asked, his amber eyes fiery with excitement.

Oh God, it was. It could have been tighter. Shuichi suddenly wanted to struggle, to keep fighting against the ropes. His body twitched again; blood pumped into his groin.

"Want to play?"

Shuichi moaned and threw back his head. "Yes, Yuki-san."

"You'll get to soon." Yuki ran a hand along Shuichi's back, stopping a bit to squeeze his buttocks. He circled around to face Shuichi and took his torso in his hands. "I'm putting you on the floor now. Bend your knees - I won't let you fall."

Shuichi slowly lowered his knees, transferring his weight onto Yuki's arms. As he surrendered his body to Yuki's more and more, he felt warm inside. It was like he was being taken care of, like he was safe. Yuki guided Shuichi's knees to the floor, and then pushed him so he lay on his side.

"Stay." Yuki ordered and took out another rope.

Shuichi wanted to cry out, he wanted to beg. His cock was pleading to be touched. He tried to tell himself that this was how it was supposed to be. This was a part of what he wanted.

The last rope. Yuki tied one end to the rope around Shuichi's feet, and then tied the other end to the rope around Shuichi's wrists. Shuichi chewed on his own tongue. He tried to pull himself into a ball and barely moved an inch. He squirmed around on the floor.

Yuki crouched before Shuichi and laughed. "Like a cat in a ball of yarn."

Shuichi tried to bend himself again, the knots near his groin tightened around his cock and balls. He whined pitifully.

Yuki took the feathery end of tickler and ran it near Shuichi's nose. "Still want to play, little cat?"

Shuichi drew away from the tickler. Yuki then moved down Shuichi's chest and to his groin. "Oooh!" Shuichi exclaimed. He bucked his hips as much as they could move, which only caused the ropes to pinch more. He let out another loud moan.

"Oh, that's what I want to hear," purred Yuki. He ran a hand over Shuichi's chest as he forced the tickler between Shuichi's legs.

Shuichi couldn't stop moaning. He pulled even harder on the ropes, tried to pull them to their limit. No good. They were far too tight. Yuki brought the tickler up towards his groin; began to circle it around his cock. Shuichi tried to relax, tried to concentrate on what Yuki was doing. The ties put him on edge. Every time he moved he felt something else pinch or rub against him. When he tried to stay still the tickler would make him want to squirm again.

He's trapped me, Shuichi thought. But what a way to be trapped...

Yuki pulled the tickler away. "I'm bored with this."

He put it back on the table. Shuichi felt a twinge of disappointment, but that didn't last for long. Yuki unzipped his pants, pulled Shuichi's head up by his hair, and thrust his cock in Shuichi's mouth.

"Mmmm!" Shuichi started sucking as soon as he felt Yuki's cock. Yuki still kept a hold on his hair, and then began to pull and push Shuichi's head to and from his cock.

It was like being an object, like being a toy. Shuichi remembered the anxiety of their first time together. He was a virgin then, eager to please and prove himself. The old urge was dissipating by the minute. Shuichi didn't have to please, he just had to be. He just had to exist and to feel and to obey. Shuichi closed his eyes and took the feeling in.

Yuki pulled out his cock and let go of Shuichi's hair. Shuichi gasped and breathed heavily. Yuki let him go and Shuichi writhed a bit on the ground.

"I want more of you." Yuki trailed a finger down Shuichi's neck, down his chest to the first knot. He pulled on it a bit. "Why don't you get yourself out of these ropes?"

Shuichi stopped mid-moan. "Wait ... WHAT?"

"There's a knot right above your wrists that's well in your reach. Untie yourself." Yuki pulled off his shirt and threw it at Shuichi's face.

Shuichi sputtered and shook his head so the shirt fell off his head. "I could have untied myself the whole time?"

"You didn't seem to care. And by the way ..." Yuki pulled back his hand and smacked it again across Shuichi's ass. Shuichi let out a yell. "I still didn't say that you could talk."

Jerk. Shuichi thought. He felt shameful, stupid ... and a bit disappointed. He had really enjoyed the thought that there was no way out of the ropes.

Another hard slap across his ass broke his thoughts. "Be a bit more eager to please your master," growled Yuki.

In a panic, Shuichi jerked wildly and pulled on the ropes. As before, it only succeeded in tightening them. He rocked back and forth.

"You're tied up, idiot. You're not in a straight jacket."

Shuichi growled in frustration and let himself slack. The anger combined with his extreme horniness made his normally low patience even worse. He didn't want to please anymore. He whined and pulled on the ropes again and again.

"Stop that, Shuichi."

He didn't stop. Shuichi rocked back and forth. He tried to kick, but that only pulled the rope around his wrists tighter. He winced from the pain but kept on pulling.

"I said, 'Stop that.'" Yuki grabbed Shuichi by the hair and grabbed onto his ass, digging his fingernails in.

"Owwwww!" Shuichi cried.

"Shut up. You were doing worse to yourself!" Yuki yelled back. "If you kept that up you would have dislocated your joints or put a nasty rope burn on your skin." Yuki let go of Shuichi and stood up. He glared down at him. "Now get over your little fit and untie yourself."

That knocked him down. Shuichi suddenly felt sick. He liked submitting to Yuki, liked the ties. There was even a part of him that liked being hurt; he couldn't really explain it. Maybe a part of him liked the idea of being bad, of being deviant. No, there was no "maybe" - it was true. Yuki was so much more experienced than him. Even though he was only four years older it felt like they were a generation apart. Doing this had made Shuichi feel like he was on Yuki's level, like he was worthy of him. And Yuki had lied to him. No, he'd laughed at him.

Resigned, Shuichi grabbed onto the knot and started to pull on it, shifting his weight back and forth in an attempt to get leverage. He was such an idiot. Maybe he was supposed to have figured out this a long time ago. After some pulling, the knot began to loosen. God, he hated this. This was the way it was always going to be, wasn't it? No matter what he did he would always be the child, always be the "damn brat." Finally, the knot came undone, releasing his legs.

The wrists would have to come next. Shuichi tried to figure out where the knot was with the tip of his fingers. Then he heard Yuki panting hard. He looked up. Yuki was staring down at him intently, his blond bangs draping over his eyes like icicles, beads of sweat forming on his forehead. Shuichi lowered his eyes and caught a glimpse of Yuki's hand clenched around his cock.

Yuki was masturbating?

To him?

Yuki started to look up. Shuichi jerked his head down and reached again. He found the end of a tie and pulled on it. The rope came loose and Shuichi pulled his wrists apart.

The hard part was over. Shuichi pushed himself onto his back and then up for a second to stretch out his arms (and maybe he raised his hips a bit, just to give Yuki a bit of a view hey why not?). Then he lowered himself to the ground, his back facing toward Yuki as he bent over and grabbed the knots at his feet. Shuichi kicked the ropes away and moved onto the ropes above his knees, freeing them as well.

He had full range of motion now. All the ropes were gone except the web on his torso. Shuichi stretched his arms out, pushing his ass back towards Yuki. Then Shuichi crawled along the floor and slowly picked up the ropes with his mouth. He hoped he looked sexy as he slinked over to Yuki, making an effort to move in a way that would accentuate his body. He looked up at Yuki and tossed his hair.

"Meow," Shuichi muttered through the ropes, a wicked glint in his eye.

Yuki's golden eyes met his. He smiled, "Trying to dominate from the bottom, little cat?" He took the ropes from Shuichi's mouth and pushed Shuichi's head down on his cock again. Shuichi sucked it eagerly. "I shouldn't be so nice to you. Ooof! You're such a naughty little boy. Trying to get me going even more with that obvious posing? Trying to seduce me? You're lucky I like it better than your little tantrums."

Punish me then, Shuichi thought. He could care less at the moment. Yuki liked him - liked using him and watching him. Even the overwhelming desire to have himself pleasured, to ram his cock in or against Yuki, couldn't compare to this - couldn't compare to the knowledge that he was wanted. That he was sexy enough to impress him and turn him on and ... Shuichi sucked as hard and fast as he could. He tried every trick he knew, from using his teeth to pulling back and forth on the cock to circling the tip with his tongue.

Yuki moaned loudly, but then suddenly pulled Shuichi away and threw him to the ground. Before Shuichi could react, he jumped upon him and took Shuichi's wrists in his hand, pinning them over Shuichi's head. They kissed, violent and hard. Yuki grinded his cock against Shuichi's, making Shuichi howl.

"Naughty, disobedient little brat." Yuki bit down on Shuichi and dug his fingernails into his ass once again. Shuichi cried out. "Do you know what I do to little brats?"

Shuichi eagerly took the bait. "Punish them. I've been bad, Yuki-san. Punish me."

"Heh. You're not so stupid, are you?"

Yuki let Shuichi go and quickly stood up. Almost immediately Shuichi crouched before Yuki, the ropes digging into his skin as he did so.

"Now you want to be obedient. What about before?"

"I'm sorry, Yuki-san."

Yuki grabbed the paddle off the table and slapped it across Shuichi's ass. A moan this time. "I don't believe you."

"I'm sorry ... I'm sorry ..."

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Yuki mimicked in high-pitched voice. He grabbed a fistful of Shuichi's hair and slapped him again. "You have to do better than that."

"I'm sorry. I'm yours, Yuki-san. It was wrong to disobey you. I - OW! I deserve everything you - Ow, it hurts! Everything you give me."

Yuki clutched Shuichi to his chest with one arm, his other moving down to pinch Shuichi's thigh. "Yes, yes you do."

Shuichi threw back his head and moaned, taking pleasure in the feel of Yuki's body against his. Yuki wasn't so gentle. He untied the final knot and roughly pulled the rope off of Shuichi's body, creating a lash as the ropes ripped across his ribs and back. As he did this he would stop every once in awhile to thrust his cock against Shuichi. When Yuki finally got Shuichi free, he held him tight and started to trace the lines in Shuichi's skin left by the rope with his tongue. Despite the lightness of the gesture, the now-sensitive patches of skin just turned it into a new type of pain. Oh God, why wouldn't Yuki fuck him? How much longer did he have to be good?

Yuki took a tube of lubricant out of his pocket and pulled down his pants completely, stepping out of them and kicking them away. He put some lube on his fingers and shoved them into Shuichi's ass. Shuichi couldn't help himself anymore. He bucked his hips and came, his head rolling back, yelling loudly in release.

A minute after he came, his eyes shot open. Oh no. As if on cue, Yuki pushed him to the floor. Shuichi barely had time to turn around when Yuki pounced on top of him.

"You don't have any control, do you?"

"No, Yuki-san," Shuichi tried to smile.

Yuki repaid it by ramming his cock inside Shuichi. Shuichi yelled. He didn't have enough time. He tried to relax as best as possible, tried to accommodate Yuki but he was going so fast, so hard. Shuichi couldn't decide whether to moan or scream.

"Does it hurt, little boy?" Yuki bit Shuichi on the shoulder, and then dug his thumb into a rope-mark. "I bet it does. I bet it does and I bet you like it."

Shuichi couldn't answer by this point. The pain and pleasure was too much for him. Both feelings had wrapped around him like Yuki's ropes. He couldn't feel anything else, could barely think. He closed his eyes and let it all take him over. Let Yuki take him over.

He was Yuki's. Totally Yuki's. He liked it this way.

The thrusts came harder now. Shuichi felt himself wanting to come again. He tried to hold it off until he heard Yuki's moans. He arched his back as Yuki pulled out of him and came on his body, the cum hitting his stomach. Yuki grabbed onto Shuichi's cock and squeezed it hard. Shuichi was a goner.

He lay on the floor; Yuki's warm cum already drying on him. Laying there he suddenly felt all of his wounds. The ropes, the paddle, Yuki's cock ... he could still feel the marks on him. Every inch of him felt painful and absolutely exhausted. And yet he felt wonderful, better than he had ever felt before.

Yuki wrapped his arms around him, gently. He lifted up Shuichi's head and kissed him. Shuichi hugged him tightly and eagerly kissed back, moaning at the feel of Yuki's warm skin against his wounds. He could have stayed in this moment forever.

"I love you," Shuichi whispered.

"Some people would call you insane."

Shuichi could only smile.

Yuki broke the hug and looked into Shuichi's eyes. They were unusually affectionate and kind. Shuichi felt like melting. Yuki was right, if anyone saw that they probably would think he was crazy. Let them think so. He loved Yuki - words couldn't possibly describe how wonderful it was.

His eyes didn't stay that way for long. Yuki turned away. "I need a smoke. You can use the shower if you want."

"Okay," Shuichi got up and started to run to the bathroom. "I'll be waiting until you get in bed - ACK!" he almost tripped over the carpet. "Wait for me."

"Yeah, sure." Yuki reached for his pack.

Shuichi ran into the bathroom and closed the door behind him. He stretched out his aching limbs. As he did so, he caught a glimpse of himself in the full length mirror on the other wall. He turned to look at it.

The rope marks were still visible on him. He hadn't gotten a good look at them while tied up. They were perfect, symmetrical. Like a bit of calligraphy. Over the indentations he could see the red marks on his ass from the paddle, the purple marks from Yuki's pinching, the bite marks on his shoulder.

Shuichi stood to face himself in the mirror, reached up his arms to get a look at himself. And he thought about what Yuki said to him.

Who are you doing this for? For you, or for me?

Shuichi smiled back at himself. He had his answer now.

The End.